Humorous and funny Free Verse poems and/or funny poems about Free Verse. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Free Verse funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Free Verse Poems.
Poem Details | by
Maureen Mcgreavy |
Categories:
funny love, woman,
Out there
With her flair for chasing inspiration
She draws you in her reason
Connecting dots and constellations
Tripping
She takes you by the hand
Her world as messy as her mind
You need a guide
And as you wade through her chaff
Her heaps of half thoughts
Her every whim expressed
The only thing you know for sure is
Out there exists
Date: 11.19.2019
Contest Name: Disarray
Sponsor: Nina Parmenter
Poem Details | by
Charlie Smith |
Categories:
fantasy, humor, imagery,
When the sun kisses each drop of rain,
spirited colors warm the heart...
like a wind wisped feather,
landing lightly on the soul.
Romance calls,
from a fresh faint whisper
mingled cleverly among the fallen.
A daydream smiles,
in a seductive voice.
Conjured memories evolve,
from indifference to fact,
plunging deep into fantasy,
erotically eager,
intoxicatingly anxious.
All is euphorically joyful.
05/16/2021<>
Poem Details | by
Eric Nolan |
Categories:
funny, happiness, life, satire, upliftingme, me,
My butt crack
Is quite a split
It supports the rest of me
when I sit
you thought I was gonna say something else didn't you ?
My butt crack
Is a marvel to behold
It was cute when I was young
but now offensive since I'm old
My butt crack
Is pretty darn straight
can you imagine if it was crooked
pretty weird sight I would rate
My butt crack
Is funny to me
when I bend over in my jeans
It peeks out
for you to see
My butt crack
wanted me to write this today
for no other reason
then just to say......................
I gotta split
LOL
Eric (and sometimes not)
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, life,
No one wants to be left on the shelf for years
Guess you could say I’ve popped my cork
Now I’m fully mature with a rich full body
I could be described as a little fruity with a hint of spice
Please don’t keep me bottled up
Just give me time to breathe
Contest :- A wine Connoisseur
Sponsor: Chase Trevi
08~14~15
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous,
One look at you – that’s all it took
Your long long legs that seem to go on forever
Those eyes staring at me
All I feel for you is revulsion
Hate – it’s a horrible word but I simply detest you
There will never be a place for you in my life ...
Goodbye
Then I flushed the spider down the plughole!
26th March 2015
Poem Details | by
Arthur Vaso |
Categories:
art, dark, evil, funny, humorous, internet,
Skip ad
poem will resume very soon
wait
pause
turn off ad block
and
ad blocker
get dressed
is not that kind of poem
vote
please favorite me
I am flavor to be
like me
love me
photoshop me
pause for second ad
add ads, subtract ads
multiply wine ads
get more wine
is a long damn add
ok
bought the Mercedes
make love
to words
iPassion
is in
snap snap and chat
latex friendships
hollywood dreams
with amex
I never leave home
there she rests
in the trunk
blood mixed
with that new car smell
everything is modern these days
even my jail cell
Poem Details | by
Maureen Mcgreavy |
Categories:
humor, writing,
The page
bears so eagerly
the weight
of everything
inside of me
my pen prostrate
leaves a dent
I muse
this paper could use
some weightlessness
I make an airplane
instead
Poem Details | by
Ann Foster |
Categories:
anti bullying, appreciation, cancer, cry, faith, humor, hurt,
Come into my house,
Sit anywhere you like.
No, not at my table,
No, not on my chair.
Come into my house,
Sit anywhere.
I invited you,
I opened up my home.
Oh, I changed my mind,
It is a vaulted tome.
Sit anywhere.
Come into my house,
You really are not welcome.
You are a phantom guest,
And a sadly, unwanted pest,
Yet still...
Sit anywhere.
It is a perfect place,
You should have been more proud,
Just to be invited,
And permitted, in the crowd.
Sit anywhere.
With rules and hidden spaces.
And a common thought out plan,
You do not fit, so do not sit,
“Sit anywhere”.
Poem Details | by
Scott Thirtyseven |
Categories:
giggle, humorous, morning,
MORNING
Good morning World.
Damn you!
and your warm
sunray fingers
prying open my eyes.
Robbing me of my
nocturnal fantasies,
my semiconscious bliss.
Leaving the remnants
of my peace
and tranquillity
laying scattered across
my face and through
my hair.
Your rising light
shrinking the shadows
of my freedom.
I will not be seduced
by your clear blue promises.
For your pressing realities
already taste foul
in my mouth.
Leave me Morning
to my diminishing serenity.
I have performed this piece and it shows on you tube (I hope this works, if not try copying to your address bar):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egYjy4Iu5e8&feature=youtu.be
enjoy
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
car, humorous,
The day started badly as I had a bat flattery on my vodge diper
It was roaring with pain when I arrived at the par cark at the mall
Went to put my bopping in the shoot and I turned into a bowel feast
I’d had a blushing crow… there was a rent in the dear
It had been hit by a bunken drum - I was mopping had!
He tried to apologise but was whiring his slords
I got out my phobile moan and a policeman cook my tall
He arrived at the mall in his canda par at the lead of spite
After my lad buck I went home to tell dumb and mad
Dad teased my ears, said I could use the buttle shush until it was mended
Contest: Spoonerisms Sponsored by Roy Jerden
02~29~16
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, love,
Just one look at you
Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me
I hate the feelings you evoke
Greed
Desire
Lust
Just want to hold you, devour you
I don’t want to see you go
But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box!
9th March 2015
Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton
I chose Love as my theme
~awarded 1st place~
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
food, humorous, thanksgiving,
Turkey so dry that I can’t speak
Brussel sprouts boiled for a week
Roast potatoes burnt to a crisp
Lumpy gravy
I feel
Sick
Jan Allison
26th October
Inspired by Andrea’s contest but not written for it!
Poem Details | by
Liam Mcdaid |
Categories:
funny,
Out shopping met an old friend from school
he turns to me serious looking
what are you at these days
Well says I
working for a China man
picking up crumbs
for disabled birds
Those with broken wings
who are unable to fly smiling
to warmer sunnier climates
Whoa he sounded shocked
he said what a job
What's the money like
he asked laughing out loud
I said less than peanuts
out all weathers
Barely feed a mouse
God I am glad he said
that I have bumped into you
saying you have just really cheered me up
What a man really needed
Peanuts I replied
He began laughing
saying that I was a character
really brightened up his dull day
leaving all I heard was him laughing
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, valentines day, roses are red,
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I’m up for a quickie
Do you fancy one too?
13th February 2015
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
color, crush, food, humorous,
I met this cool dude called Jaffa
At the beginning he was so sweet to me
Sadly after a while he gave me the pip
In the end he ran out of juice and I had to squash him
Then I pulverised his flesh to a pulp
Cheers!
Contest: United Colours Orange Sponsored by Silent One
03~04~16
Poem Details | by
Rhona Mcferran |
Categories:
food, humor, humorous, silly,
Love me or hate me
few people can take me
plain, unadulterated, true to myself
their compulsive need to gussy me up
or completely disguise me
gives me nightmares...
Horrible- horrible!
The worst is where
they try to make me
Savory.
Suffocated in sauces, sweet relish
and pickled beets
garnished with green olives
and fussy-cut vienna sausages
all dancing in fancy chorus lines
on top of me
Oh No! I can't take it...
It just can't be!
What are they thinking?!
I awake with a snug sensation
as something warmish
drapes and
drizzles
down my back
AAAAAHHH!
Caramel sauce-
Thank God!
Poem Details | by
Moonbee Canady |
Categories:
daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, mother, nature, nostalgia, peace, people, seasons
Its Raining…
God’s Cleansing Tool
Cloud-Concerto… How Cool !
Plop-Plop Plopping into Pothole Pools
On the Grass, Pavements and On My Own-Sweet- Fools…
who, don’t have Sense enough, to get out of the Rain…
… I think I’ll go Join Them… Again
Amen
Poem Details | by
Jannie Breedt |
Categories:
best friend, funny, grandfather, old,
Redeployed in an ugly skin
Pleated and spotted and grumpy within
What I call walking ,they call shuffling
I'm bending down to tie my shoe
While Im down here what else can I do?
When driving down my lip protrudes
Only for the dentist will I open mouth
Okay , Ill wave at you but I wont smile
The dog and the toilet are my only true friends
You get up to go and then you go again
Memories are yesterday
Forgetfulness is all over today
Ill tell you what it is
But forgot what I was going to say
Got to buy dogfood
Where are my glasses?
Who am I talking to?
They've all gone away
Poem Details | by
Terry L. Allen |
Categories:
funny,
Nothing in the world so disarming,
so charming in it's domain.
Across a crowded room or two feet away
it's all the same.
The shortest distance between two people
despite any other claim.
Is for now and will forever be
with no denial the human smile.
Poem Details | by
Anya Chebukina |
Categories:
funny, love,
This is just for fun..=)
In the basement of my heart
there is a basement
and in that basement there are two basements.
You open one
and enter the basement
only to find out there is yet another basement
That basements basement
was light and blue
But that basements basement
was black
from basement to basement you walked
until you couldn't anymore
The basements basements
basements basements basements
basements basements basements basement
of my heart.
You found my love...
Poem Details | by
Roger Wilson |
Categories:
animal, betrayal, fate, giggle,
The frog croaked
The cricket chirped
The cricket croaked
The frog burped
Poem Details | by
Nick Bagnall |
Categories:
funny, loss
She was wonderful and powerful
My object of desire
Her smooth clean face so beautiful
The apple of my eye
My love she had an accident
She fell from up on high
I found her broken body there
'Twas lying on the ground
Now all I have's her memory
The songs we used to share
Oh how I miss that ipod
My heart it megahertz
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
animal, death, funny, humor, satire, silly, spiritual,
Each of us have two wolves living inside us
One wants to eat burritos
and watch horror movies.
The other wants to walk about
in its underpants all day
snacking on cheetos between long naps.
The wolf that thrives is the one
who lives on with diabetes while the other
dies of a heart attack.
Poem Details | by
Paula Goldsmith |
Categories:
hate, humor, love, relationship, today, together, uplifting,
Today,
I love you.
Today,
I hate you.
This week,
I love you,
This week,
I hate you.
Can this go on,
it has for years.
This love hate relationship,
is now over.
I am kicking you to the curb,
to the trash can you must go.
Did you figure me out,
I am your bathroom scale.
Hooray~you are gone.
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, poetry, word play,
Deer poet tree righters fore the cite
Pleas will ewe bee sweet
and worn me if ewe have scene any miss stakes eye have maid
butt eye no my speeling and ewes off English is prefect!
Eye am knot shore if eye have ever tolled ewe
that when eye right poet tree at knight ore in the mourning
eye don’t knead too ewes a smell chequer ore a theo sorearse
Off coarse, eye don’t no weather aisle get a first plaice inn the con test
butt eye want John too chews me sew eye can crews two victory!
HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU THAT...... Poetry Contest
Sponsored by John Lawless
11/11/20