Humorous and funny Apple poems and/or funny poems about Apple. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Apple funny poems!
Written by
Theresa Cw
Categories:
fun, humor,
Humdinger Spice Apple Pie
Humdinger Spice Apple Pie
Yesterday I baked a humdinger spice apple pie
Then my daughter called said she’d stop and give it a try
She was smacking her lips
Couldn’t take any tips
She told me I’m the queen of all the best apple pies.
Written: 2014 in the Autumn
Theresa Marie
Written by
David Dowling
Categories:
art, food, funny, philosophy, visionary,
A Poem About An Apple That Is Sure To Disappoint the Reader
I see an apple.
There it is.
Written by
Robert L. Hinshaw
Categories:
history, humorous,
The Day the Granny Smith Apple Fell
When the apple dropped on Sir Newton's bean,
He cursed naughty words making quite a scene!
He was somewhat placated,
When to him 'twas related,
He'd found gravity, wholly unforeseen!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2015 All Rights Reserved
Written by
Ali Alnamer
Categories:
kids, funny,
Apple
An apple a day
Keeps the doctor away
So be sure
That you eat more
You will be strong
Belive me that's not wrong
Written by
Probir Gupta
Categories:
beauty, hilarious, imagery, nature,
The Bitter Apple
The city tops in murder
But is among the safest
So says well known newspaper
Last night the apple was sweet
This morning it is bitter
Time so weird inside the brain
Till the other moment no
Doors there were in the closed room
Now five doors as you can see
Pitch black night as sun rises
Very dense packed cloud in sky
Many a lie in the truth
Such is life in cup and cone
Flat land where we seek fine hills
World is an oxymoron
______________________________________
31/8/2016
Written by
Sabrina Robillard
Categories:
food, funny,
Apple Pie
Apple pie is so divine,
I eat it all then feel like swine.
Written by
Raj Napal
Categories:
food, fruit, health, humorous, silly, symbolism, tribute,
Apple
Round with a crispy white core.
Crunch it, taste its juicy play.
Teeth strong and healthy, its lore.
Apples will keep docs away.
Play with it, throw ball, catch it.
Use as a target to train.
It is hard, good throw and hit.
Swollen eye, it can give pain.
Apple cider is best sweet.
Cider better when it’s brewed.
Cider moment, sways falls prat.
Spirit juices got to his head.
Apple crumble, sweet delight.
Custard adorns, rich flavor.
Moms use it to make nice treats.
Kids gobble It in wonder.
Apples good like wine and grape.
Tasty like strawberry.
Can cause pain like banana.
It was a forbidden fruit!
Written by
John Williams
Categories:
children, funny,
Toffee Apple Tragedy
A little boy had a big lick
Of a toffee apple on a stick,
His tongue got stuck
When he had a huge suck,
Poor little red-tongued Rick.
Written by
Leon Wilson
Categories:
food, funny
Apple Pie
My jeans are tight I don't know why
It must of been that apple pie
I couldn't resist it piping hot
With lots of custard draped on top.
That soft lush pastry just makes me go yum
As my mouth competes with my tum
I feel so bloated and fit to drop
When I tuck in, I must remember to stop.
I know I ate a little too much
But an apple pie wasn't meant just to touch
So get stuck in and start to eat
You know you deserve a little treat.
Written by
Mark Goodson
Categories:
food, funny, philosophy,
The Apple
The green of an apple is a forth coming blessing
With its confirmed ripeness our lips begin the pressing
But remember to address it for any worms
Less in thy mouth they wiggle and squirm
For like bleu cheese dressing the experience is quit depressing
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
food, humorous,
Please Don'T Grumble About My Apple Crumble
With sugar, butter and flour I fumble -
it’s a great way of cleaning my nails
Don’t grumble when finding specks in your crumble ...
but I’ll know when I see your face pales!
A pure tongue in cheek poem... but we have been given lots of cooking apples and I'm going to make apple crumble!!
10-23-17
Written by
Randy Johnson
Categories:
food, funny, humor, people,
An Apple a Day
People started returning apples to my store.
Because of word of mouth, they don't want them anymore.
I got pretty irritated because of all of those returns.
People don't want my apples because they have worms.
People don't want them even though I've started selling them half price.
They don't want my apples because they're smart enough to think twice.
Some say an apple a day keeps the doctor away but I disagree.
Because if you eat one of my apples, a doctor is what you'll need.
I'm unhappy and if you could see my face right now, you would see a frown.
The health department just examined my apples and they've shut me down.
Written by
Randy Johnson
Categories:
food, funny, on writing and words, eve,
If Eve Hadn'T Ate That Apple
If Eve hadn't ate that apple, we'd be going out in public in the nude.
We could go to the library in the buff and not get sued.
If Eve hadn't ate that apple, Hugh Hefner would be out of work.
We could visit our neighbors with nothing on and not be called jerks.
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
humor, new york,
Big Apple Eye Scream
Central Park's cool event in May
Brings the gigolos out to play
Ilene says, "Its true!
They're all over you!"
Its Banana Split & Run Day
Written by
Fritz Purdum
Categories:
encouraging, food, humor, introspection, wisdom,
Black Coffee and Apple Pie
Everything a body could need
How happy could it make you be
When nothing can make you is fulfilled
As black coffee and apple pie ending your meal
Written by
Terry Miller
Categories:
humorous,
2 Rose-Apple Avenue
Along Lemon Lane
Down Clementine Close
Round banana bend
Past Persimmon Place
Just down Rhubarb Road
At 2 Rose-Apple Avenue
You will find old Jackfruit
On his blueberry bike
With its watermelon wheels,
Tamarind tires,
And strawberry saddle.
It's plum tricky to ride.
But he doesn't give a fig!
A Watermelon Fantasy Ride To Feed My Imagination Poetry Contest, placed 7th
Sponsored by: Mystic Rose Rose
Date wrote: 7th July 2022
Written by
Izzy Gumbo
Categories:
faith, friendship, funny
The Ticklish Apple
Adam pleaded with Eve
“darling, swallow it “
Her brow went up with ease
“tease me to need you”
she said…
it’s been so long since
words carry on in sense
interest held intense
enough to be scent….
mental intensity
reaches insanity
and breaches the soul
hear, the orgasmic tones
teaching, in subtle moans
...The Art of Love.
Ala.mode in a cart eh?
“madman… come this way”
she said
the galactic pipers playing
musical notes are swaying
butterflies dancing
and your eyes
just write
while I sing awhile
and just smile
here, on a long mile. ;)
“I am a ball, but not the chain.”
"Adam's apple" ;)
Written by
Alfred Berggren
Categories:
humor,
Apple Pie
There was an old maid named Clorenza Brown.
She had her eye upon Willian Lee Crown.
She baked him apple pie
the hard crust was so dry
that poor William caught first stage out of town.
Written by
Trevor Mcleod
Categories:
analogy, assonance, character, funny, giggle, identity, nursery rhyme,
Apple Lay
I'm being followed by an apple
I feel like I've been picked
I wonder if it rolls on by
I'll have a bushel wit
I try to say it isn't me
who sees it as it falls
For me; I'm certain love is me
and gravity can't call
So on I go remembering when
I saw it light the way
And say this apple isn't me
and kick it where it lay
Written by
Donald Meikle
Categories:
funny, mystery, on writing and words,
Apple Sand
to time the rhyme or range of orange
when to smile and when to cringe
nothing fits but on the fringe
yet I find red yellow wonder
defining moments to unhinge
My orange dingy dinghey
the cold sea it's under
icily swelling nicely
A weighted wait
To float a boat
Written by
Geoffrey Brewer
Categories:
humor,
Try the Apple Pie
When Adam and Eve
Set up house down in Eden
With do-it-yourself
They had no time for breedin
Expansion was slow
Hardly bothered to try
But took off when Eve baked up
That first apple pie
8 December 2019
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
humor, new york,
Big Apple Eve
I pictured her milking an udder
And it made my whole body shudder
Then mum piped up,
"Forget her, pup!
She's bound to be some buddy's mudder!"
Written by
Lu Loo
Categories:
cat, humor,
An Apple a Day Keeps the Vet Away
an Apple a day,
keeps the vet away...
streaming and searching
and thinking while purring-
the claws on my paws
won't stop Google surfing!
an Apple a day,
keeps the little mice away...
January 24, 2017
Written by
James Edward Lee Sr.
Categories:
analogy, appreciation, engagement, funny,
The Blue Apple Not True Not 4 U-Cd
Tho! there's the apple blue
Thine favorite color hue
There's a worm in it
Eating of it makes you sick
Royalty is true, but this apple was not for you. God's got something
A better a big ole cold watermelon
6/5/22
Written by James Edward Lee Sr. 2022©
Written by
Krish Radhakrishna
Categories:
beautiful, crush, cute love, first love, funny love, love, romance,
Apple of My Eye
I bargained for apples at lesser price,
said she with a smile “Take it or leave it!”
“they are so delicious and bigger size!”
I bargained for apple at lesser price,
She and I had already dated thrice,
I was there for her and she knew it!
I bargained for apples at lesser price,
said she with a smile “Take it or leave it”!
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sponsor Edward Ibeh
written 01/11/2020
theme - Hobson’s Choice
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