These are funny poems written by international poets. Funny poems are added daily and hundreds of new funny poems are added weekly for your reading pleasure.
Poem Details | by
Healey, Jim |
Categories:
humor,
There once was a baker who loved to boast
about his bakery down by the coast.
But the bakery burned down
and he exclaimed with a frown,
Now all of my business is toast!
Poem Details | by
Logerie, Hebert |
Categories:
adventure, books, character, emotions, humorous, satire, writing,
Many poems are about the titles
Not the contents
Many books are about the titles
Not common sense
Many stars are about the names
Not the distance
Many actors about the names
Not the actions
Nonsense sails
And common sense rarely prevails
Color does not matter all the time
In many situations, it can be characterize
As a major sin or a colossal crime
Of enormous proportion or incredible size
It is the darn title
Giselle and Lionel.
Copyright © April 2024, Hébert Logerie, all rights reserved.
Hébert Logerie is the author of several collections of poems.
Poem Details | by
Blake, Clive |
Categories:
bird, fun, funny, humor, life, philosophy, poetry,
Everybody makes boobies,
Put our big feet in it,
Just some clumsy footwork
And we find ourselves in a pit.
Everybody makes boobies,
Everybody makes mistakes,
When shooting our life’s film,
There is bound to be out-takes.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
father, flying, humor, love, mother, mythology, sun,
In a house, half-mad, with mother and dad,
And a labyrinth he couldn’t escape -
He trudged the maze, with a string ball, so sad.
The sky’s warm, gay orb, too, was round in shape.
So pretty was she, he dreamt as he marched,
And he constructed a bright plan in his head,
Sweating through shirts which his mother had starched,
He remembered what his father had said.
He would see his girl (the sun in the sky),
Augmenting his arms with two waxen wings.
A catapult shot him o’er clouds so high.
He burned, melted, crashed, his arms then in slings.
Dad said, “too close”, but his expounding lacks -
It was - his wings were inferior wax.
Poem Details | by
Fowler, Linda Alice |
Categories:
environment, fish, fishing, fun, humor, nature, sports,
Oh how I’m wishing that I were fishing!
I’d love to see the swishing that I’ve been missing.
\\\\ ///\\\ ////
\fins ‘n skins/
catfish
dogfish
goatfish
lizardfish
goosefish
queenfish
angelfish
devilfish
kingfish
fish!
\|/
Hungry! I am getting wolfish for a pescatarian dish!
Oh, how I wish I could catch a fish!
Poem Details | by
Edmonds , Beryl |
Categories:
dream, humor,
I had a dream, it was obscene
Read on if you dare
I was at a masquerade ball
And all there were bare.
Except for wearing masks of course
No one cared at all
Just got on with naked dancing
Bouncing round the hall.
The funny part was when they parked
Backsides on a pew
When they came to stand up again
The seat stood up too.
There was lots of piercing screaming
As seats were parted
And some very red rosy cheeks
On vision as folk partied.
At midnight came the final dance
The dream came to its close
I switched on the light, got such a fright
The floor was strewn with clothes.
Poem Details | by
Wolf, Gershon |
Categories:
education, food, fun, humorous, irony, nostalgia,
Too stoned to care
wild eyes and hair
My friend and I dare
to order four pizzas
Where are your friends
the manager inquired
Oh, they’ll be here in a bit
our tongues purebred liars
Well, we snarfed down the pizzas
though ‘our friends’ never showed
So, when we asked the proprietor
how much we owed…
He told us $200 bucks
‘coz it’s just your good luck
to meet up with a fellow sleaze
who understands your ‘munchies’
~ and has already contacted the fuzz
Poem Details | by
Rigoler, Maurice |
Categories:
humor,
Flackmoth says he wouldn’t be
caught dead in a suit and tie;
but then ruefully reflects he
likely will – unless he doesn’t die.
Either way, with or without,
he still will have to be laid out –
and if stripped of every thread of clothes
and stark naked, please, keep the coffin closed.
Poem Details | by
Rigoler, Maurice |
Categories:
humor,
Flackmoth chuckles when he hears
chickens have neither teeth nor ears.
Nothing strange about that, he said?
“I’m nearly deaf now and in a few years
I expect no tooth left in my head.
Deaf and toothless chickens will still push
eggs, if they’re lucky, through their tush
whereas mine will only provide an outlet
for the same old crap, forget an omelette!
Poem Details | by
Sarvida Jr., Hugo |
Categories:
age, baby, happiness, humor,
Someone asked my age
I said, "I'm still quite young".
They call me, "Baby".
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The northern pintail does not hesitate.
For mating season, he's never late.
When he espies the first spring flower,
He heads north at fifty miles per hour.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The peregrine falcon inspires fear
In 'most every bird, far and near,
Such air pressure as he swoops so fast!
Three eyelids protect him from the blast.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The monk parakeet, decked out in lime green,
In communal nests they can oft be seen.
To raise kids, they don't depend on granny.
Instead, they hire a helper or nanny.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The barred owl - is he really wise?
He climbs trees instead of flies.
It is mostly in this regard
That he runs the risk of being disbarred.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
You may know the greylag from a Mother Goose Rhyme.
This sort of goose lays 3 to 5 eggs at a time.
If clutch size distribution is uniform, I'm
Pretty sure the egg number will likely be prime.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The green-winged teal is both cute and fat
And likes to seek food upon a mudflat.
He is known to eat a stem or a seed.
When he eats maggots, should I intercede?
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The Baltimore oriole sports an orange coat,
But I haven't seen one; to L.A., they're remote.
Their rich whistling song is a sweet herald of spring.
Ones like Frank Robinson have a great home run swing.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The black-throated blue warbler is wee and cute,
But to a caterpillar he is a brute.
With a sweet melody, he attracts his mate,
And they eat spiders when they go on a date.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
The belted kingfisher is a cool dude,
But his girlfriend is even brighter hued.
He's loaded with dazzling features, but
What I like best is his spiky haircut.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
A red-tailed hawk soars in an azure sky,
Majestically gliding - oh so high!
Is it any wonder he inspires such awe
In those who study education and law?
Poem Details | by
Kelly, B. Andrew |
Categories:
allegory, anxiety, funny, life, silly, surreal,
air rockets skyward
uppercutting inside
plastic neon flesh
contorting at inhuman angles
what does my body language spell?
ankles anchored into the Earth
to stay grounded as the wave
of time and space crashes
a flood of stagnant flux
there is a symphony of bones
snapping and cracking
in twisted orchestrations
the act of existing for me
is a resilient demonstration
Poem Details | by
Rusch, Brian |
Categories:
dream, earth, happiness, humor, life, nature, philosophy,
There must be always
Room for wild and free humor
Laughing at ourselves...
We do cry enough
Trying to better ourselves
In this journeying
Living together
This magnificent planet
Manifesting dreams
Beyond what we know
All, curious, within dreams
Searching for what's real.
So the days do pass
Perhaps Nature too, learning...
Higher Self-being.
____*____
Find comfort in this
Skirting Chaos like we do...
Better than Nothing.
Poem Details | by
Schatz, Robert |
Categories:
funny, future, humorous, time,
Then, the Good Old Days
Better than what’s now, always
This law, all obeys
When, in good times past
Bygones better, Everlast
Nows always surpassed
And, back further still
Even better then, until
The best be all's it’ll
But, this trend is woe
Each past better than then's now
Life keeps getting worse
‘Till, the Now-a-Days
At the bottom of the hill
Things aren't looking up
No, they’re not and won’t
All generations to come
The next Kids Today
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
dad, funny, memory,
(To be sung to the tune of "Cruella DeVil from Disney's 101 Dalmations)
Dadella DeVil, Dadella DeVil
If he don't make you laugh, no funny thing will
I think of him, and now I'm laughing still
Dadella, Dadella
You'll wait for him to come home from work until
You see your Dadella DeVil
At first you think Dadella's kind of nutty
He might pick you and to twirl you aroun'
But just when you think, for him you are quite ready
He'll change it up and turn you upside down
This crazy man, this lighthearted guy
I'll never forget him to the day I die
When Dad came home, it sure gave me a thrill
Dadella, Dadella DeVil
Poem Details | by
Woofsson, Woof |
Categories:
confusion, humor, science,
I buy my shoes by the foot,
Tend my front lawn by the yard,
Groom the dog by the furlong,
That’s why metrics are so hard.
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