Funny Poems About Boat or Boat Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Boat poems and/or funny poems about Boat. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Boat funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Boat Poems.

Poem Details | by Poet Destroyer A |
Categories: adventure, anti bullying, boat, humor, slavery, violence, voyage,

Pirate Bay

```Pirate Bay the Haiku``` 

pirates fierce and mean 
drowning fish, sea to sea 
parrots on their butt 

```Polly Wants A Cracker``` 

bloodthirst & brutal 
Quartermaster Gone Wild 
dirty wings on deck 

```Sea World Adventure``` 
ship crew goes on strike 
sailing the Caribbean 
wooden leg splashing 


Poem Details | by Michael Wise |
Categories: boat, humorous, ocean,

The Lark In the Dark

Sammy went out on a lark
sailing his boat in the dark
and while he got drunk
his little boat sunk
so his hangover went to the shark

Poem Details | by Bartholomew Williams |
Categories: boat, fun, funny, humorous, light, sea, youth,


A young man shipped out on the sea;
No care if ‘twas windward or lee.
	But storms came along,
	His stomach not strong,
Now sees ships only on TV!

Date:  7/15/18

Poem Details | by Brittney Lopez |
Categories: absence, age, angel, april, baptism, beautiful, beauty, bible, birth, blue, boat, body, books, boyfriend, bridal shower, flower, for her, forgiveness, freedom, funny, games, garden, girlfriend, goodbye, graduation, poetry, voice, wisdom, women, words, writing, youth,


You send bolts through my skin 
something I was never to 
accomplish with you, when I 
saw you it's like my heart sank 
to my stomach and I was in 
shock my body still my body 
heavy felt like when I moved I 
was about to fall to my knees 
you make me want to get 
inside my brain pick you up and 
take you out pick you one by 
one like a flower because I do 
love you and love you not.

Poem Details | by A.O. Taner |
Categories: betrayal, boat, change, computer, confusion, cool, crazy, cute love, emotions, fantasy, funny, funny love, heart, heartbroken, hello, irony, light, loneliness, lonely, lost love, love, love hurts, parody, relationship, river, romantic, sad love, satire, soulmate, voyage, wisdom,


I had my heart put on auto-pilot,
set to navigate towards you; 

the low-battery signal just came on,
I don't know what to do.

Poem Details | by Anisha Dutta |
Categories: boat, funny,


Goat on Boat Contest

                        A goat with white coat took a boat to float.
                         It did not notice a hole in the boat.                        
                                      Goat was so stupid.
                                      Water entered rapid.
                         Boat sank down, goat swam swift with wet white coat.


Poem Details | by Martin Kloess |
Categories: boat, funny, humor, sports,

Another Sailor's Tail Tale

They paddled till we reached the shore
Where I set them free to explore
Then back to the sea
This sailor did flee
They’ll not paddle me anymore

Poem Details | by Dorian Petersen Potter |
Categories: boat, funny, humor, humorous,

Sail and Nail


A fellow was pleased with a sale 
Till noticed the boat was missing a sail 
He was very sad 
And got so mad 
He hit the man who did the SALE with a NAIL! 

Dorian Petersen Potter 
Aka ladydp2000 

September, 8, 2014

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: adventure, america, beach, boat, cheer up, fishing, humor,

Sea Food

once a skindiver named neal

daily would make swimmers squeal

in town from new york

he carried a fork

dining on fresh ocean krill.

Poem Details | by Vincent Ray |
Categories: boat, humor,

A New Boat Owners First Emergency

A moment of much worry!
Oh...friend's phone's ring tone

Poem Details | by James Edward Lee Sr. |
Categories: adventure, character, conflict, courage, funny,

Three Monkeys On a Boat

Three Monkeys On a Boat

three monkeys on a boat
One had money, the others broke
The Second monkey rowed
As the third one stole
The first one said that was bold
The second one sworn
He call the cops, as soon as they get a shore
The third one fled
Jumped over board
The first one said "ooot-oot-hEY YOU CAN'T SWIM"
So the second one threw a life preserver and vest
No monkey No  that's candy
So the first monkey jump into the river
And so did monkey two
Then all of a sudden monkey three got back on board
The others swam to shore
Monkey three crash and drown
Guess it doesn't pay to steal

written by James Edward Lee Sr.

Poem Details | by Gry Christensen |
Categories: boat, desire, funny, heart, humor, ocean, sea,

The Anchor

I once loved
an anchor
one of those
that sails
on skin
one of those
that has 
a rowing heart
and pelting blood

One of those
who blows
mussel covered
one of those
that tells
mermaids salty lies
one of those
go down with
rum and shackles
the day he finally

© Gry W Christensen

Poem Details | by Sam Jameson |
Categories: boat, funny, humorous, sea,

Sail For Sale

The rain 
takes the rein 
to reign, 
For the seas 
will seize the ability 
he sees to have ease,
And when waters raise
they'll raze his boat 
beneath the rays 
leaving him lost
for days
I say--

Then, if it stays afloat,
I can buy a new used boat;

March 18, 2016

Poem Details | by Jerry T Curtis |
Categories: boat, humorous, nostalgia,

A 3hr Tour With 5hr Energy

For the Lady of Shallot Contest

Just sit back and hear a tale
About some folks that chose to sail
In a boat, that was so frail 
Caught up in a mighty gale
Surely, not my style

Watch the ship as it gets tossed
It sure looks like,  "All is lost"
If not for the courage of the crew and Boss
They never could've, made it across 
Here to Gillian's Isle

Poem Details | by Arthur Vaso |
Categories: humorous, sea,

The Pirate Who Stole My Boat

On the seas of turquoise green
A pirate ship approached
And stole my boat
All cargo was aboard

I was saddened at the loss that day
For the ship was a fine seaworthy vessel
I hope they take good care
Of both vessel and my wife

I shall miss them both
They been sailed many a year
Thank god I have insurance
For the vessel I held so dear


Note: No boats or wives where actually stolen, kidnapped or harmed in the making of this poem!!

Poem Details | by Cheryl Hoffman |
Categories: boat, humor, vacation,

Viking Cruise

They read all about the Viking cruise
going for the first time they hadn't a clue
the addendum read
and actually said
no raiding allowed which means the fridge too!


Poem Details | by Robert Kinard |
Categories: art, dedication, fun, happy, humor, life,

Little Man In the Boat

Ladies please take note 
this is a massage for
the little man in the boat.
To whom so much of myself 
I willingly devote. 
I hope you understand,
the way you melt in my mouth
and not in my hand.
I am forever 
your number one fan.
You spend more time 
than any dentist, 
looking down my throat.
And I have to admit,
I've always admired your boat.

From the first time
you taught me what to do.
We had fun like teenagers
skinny dipping in your canoe.
As I became the engine
to your motorboat,
you laugh whenever a hair 
gets caught in my throat.
You say I'm doing it right
when I can't breath.
I thought it was funny 
the first time I sneezed.

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: boat, funny, humorous, ocean, sea, sick, silly,

My Rare Disorder

I have a rare disorder that causes me to see everyone in the cast of any submarine movie as Don Rickles. Every bloody person is Don Rickles. Once saw a submarine movie wherein a woman was saved from a sinking ship and the captain on the submarine made love to her and they both were Don Rickles.

Poem Details | by Anisha Dutta |
Categories: funny, humorous,

Boat Ride By Goat Nursery Rhyme


             A goat wore white satin coat,
             not calling due to sore- throat.
              It hired wooden boat to float.

                             Depth of stream was hundred fathoms.
                             Water entered through hole at bottom.

           Boat sank slowly what to do!
           Goat swam to bank as I knew.
           So!  I must stop my rhyme too.


                                                  Third Place
  'Nursery Rhyme 5 ' Contest by Eve Roper

Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: funny

It's Just a Boat

There once was a boat made of wood
And named after his wife as it should
     But the name was so harsh
     When he called it fat ****
Oh why are men so misunderstood

Poem Details | by Randy Steele |
Categories: animal, boat, fishing, humor, sea,

Sea Woes

I chartered a boat for sea fishing
Those waves just kept swelling and swishing
But when the boat stopped
My stomach had flopped
To be back on land I was wishing

To go swim in the sea is so sweet
Though I swim like I'm made of concrete
That white sand's so near
There's nothing to fear
Except jellyfish stinging my feet

August 4, 2019

Poem Details | by Ema Kenyon |
Categories: boat, funny, humor, humorous,

Dastardly Crumbs, March 3, 2017 Cassidy's Poetry

I can feel the seemingly invisible shards creeping along my skin,  cutting me like glass. 
The presence of these creatures alone swallows me whole and leaves me restless. 
I promised you and myself that i wouldn’t open the doors to allow them in again, 
But here we lay unsettled, in the shadows of the broken and the fragmented that were left behind. 
I’m sorry that I ate saltine crackers in bed again.

Poem Details | by Andrew Fairchild |
Categories: boat, cute love, funny, love, marriage, memory, miss you,

I Remember That We Rowed, You Were Afraid

I remember that we rowed.
You were afraid.
And so, I gave the oars to you,
I thought, you see – control
Would help you feel
It was your boat that moved
Beneath your unsure feet.
And then, I saw your leg, and I liked you!
You laughed, hysterical!  You always laughed
When you were afraid.
I… I talked about ‘meaningful relationships’,
But you, as bold as only newness can make a person,
You wanted marriage!

You didn’t mean, with me!  Although, you married me!

And now, I’d give a bucketful of  suns,
To see you row, again!

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: anxiety, boat, courage, fear, funny, sea, voyage,

The Sunken Ship

There once stood a ship explored
Sunk at sea but was restored

But people were scared
And nobody dared

When they would say, "all aboard!"

Poem Details | by Krish Radhakrishna |
Categories: blue, boat, cute love, dream, first love, funny love, love,

Mystery Lover

in the green, green garden,
under the blue, blue sky,
did you throw me a rose
on the sly?

on the slow slow river,
in the wooden log boat,
did you sneak in for me 
a love note?

in the loud, loud thunder,
of stormy, stormy night,
did you send me signal,
with flash light?

during hot hot coffee,
in the greek restaurant,
was it you who left a 
gold pendant?

in my deep, deep slumber,
I dream and think of you,
wish you would just tell me
“I love you!”

6th place
John Lawless sponsored
Just Thinking ..... contest
Written 26/12/2020
Sapphic stanza modified to 6,6,6 3 syllables