Funny Poems About Bread or Bread Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Bread poems and/or funny poems about Bread. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Bread funny poems!

Written by Jillian Sabecky
Categories: caregiving, family, food, for him, funny love, giggle, passion,

Banana Bread

Today my husband said ' I can really go for some banana bread' 
But this is what I made instead.

A gallon of Sweet Tea.
A bowl of Green Pea's.
Turkey Club on whole wheat followed by Smoked Meat.
Corn on the Cob along with Broccoli Raab.
Chicken Wings. Shoe Strings.
Pineapple upside down cake. A chocolate Shake. 
Baked Potato served with a Stuffed Tomato

Now my husband has a belly ache. 
I don't think he likes it, when I bake.

Written by John Williams
Categories: children, funny,

Bread Roll

Hungry Jimmy from Baker's Drift
Received a bread roll as a gift,
He sliced tomato and some cheese,
Added mayo just to please,
It went down so very swift.


Written by Fritz Purdum
Categories: children, fun, funny, repetition, silly,

White Bread and Butter

We have no jelly
We have no jam
The children mutter
What shall we now eat?
              White bread and butter

We have no syrup
We have no honey
The children utter
What shall we now eat?
              White bread and butter

We have no cream cheese
We have no cheese spread
The children find no peanut butter
What shall we now eat?
              White bread and butter

We have no lunch meat
We have no avocados
The children stutter
What shall we now eat?
             White bread and butter

We have no white bread?
We have no white bread!
The children blubber
What shall we now eat?
             Another stick of butter.

Written by Ralph Sergi
Categories: humorous,

Bred By Bread

Bred by Bread
I was told in youth I was BRED by BREAD
To eat and full my skinny frame
And I ATE at least EIGHT slices of bread
Until my hunger could be sated
But there was some bread I really hated
I don’t know why but when it came to RYE
My expression came on very WRY
When that day comes that I will wed
I’LL walk my bride right down the AISLE
For sure the reception’s down the shore
And there’ll be food and bread and more
and afterwards we'll rent a SUITE
To be with her will be so SWEET

Only Homos Allowed Contest Jerry T. Curtis
Ralph Sergi March 26,2015

Written by Danielle Thompson
Categories: food, funny

Raisin Bread Break-Up

Raisin Bread of which I bought
the wrong one.
You are white, I wanted wheat.
You are hard, I prefer soft.
I will return and buy a new
Raisin Bread.
But you,
I will never forget.


Written by James Marshall Goff
Categories: humor

Shopping For Bread

This should be easy
Store Baked? (assumes better)
Brand Name? (assumes integrity)

Store baked:
39 lines of ingredients
4 of those lines real food

Brand names:
Same as above, but
Ahhh!
Found!

A brand from Milwaukee
(rye)
4- lines
Edible ingredients!

Nice slice of spam
Perfect!


11/27/13

Written by Bill Lindsay
Categories: allusion, funny,

Bread V Beer

So every single loaf of bread tells the tragic story of grains that could have been turned into beer, but ultimately failed

Written by William Robinson
Categories: food, children, funny, on work and working, people,

Bread of Kindness

Baker Bob brought breakfast biscuits
To big, bad Bennie Barker's bed.
Bob believes, sadly, that Ben behaves badly  
Because Barbara Barker rarely bakes bread.

Written by Muhammad Safa Thajudeen
Categories: humor,

The Bread Winner

They found the bread first,
To joy,arranged a contest next,
Rewarded the winner this,for his breakfast.
That's how the word bread winner came in the list!

Written by Elton Camp
Categories: humor,

The Revolting Loaf of Bread

By Elton Camp

An insect we found in a loaf of bread
But, at least, it was very safely dead

How the bug came there, I don’t know
Such things can easily happen, though

Though not very pleasant to mention
The baker had a moment of inattention

Into the batter the critter took a dive
But only for seconds remained alive

The loaf was baked at a high heat
There it was, antennae, body, feet

Any germs were surely destroyed
So the bread can safely be enjoyed

But some might not find it so keen
To have this bit of added protein

Others on the bread will munch
And not mind the extra crunch

Written by Panagiota Romios
Categories: humor, imagery,

Spaghetti and Garlic Bread

Steaming spaghetti and garlic bread.
      On a warmed red-checkered plate.
               With aromatic, hot, garlic bread.
For my epicurean tastes is just fine and dandy!
       Would be nice though, if served by a handsome,
                 Italian waiter.
 ~~~~I call that, some ravishing eye candy~~~~

       
                    1/28/2021
                       ~ 1 ~

Written by Sandra Haight
Categories: funny,

Magic Brown Bread


Magic Brown Bread


Baker fully aware
     brown bread baked gaily
          would later cause ardor
while eaten daily.

Since Muira Puama added,
     spicy amour arose.
            Basic logic found,       
bread eaten, oomph grows!

Baker grins, beams, avows
     lover pairs visit daily,
          stand perky, await turns;
munch magic bread gaily.


February 20, 2018

Contest: A Little Laughter Five
Sponsor: Edward McCall 
Rules: All words must contain 5 letters only

*Muira Puama is an herb used as an aphrodisiac

Written by Elton Camp
Categories: humorous,

The Revolting Loaf of Bread

The Revolting Loaf of Bread

By Elton Camp

An insect we found in a loaf of bread
But, at least, it was very safely dead

How the bug came there, I don’t know
Such things can easily happen, though

Though not very pleasant to mention
The baker had a moment of inattention

Into the batter the critter took a dive
But only for seconds remained alive

The loaf was baked at a high heat
There it was, antennae, body, feet

Any germs were surely destroyed
So the bread can safely be enjoyed

But some might not find it so keen
To have this bit of added protein

Others on the bread will munch
And not mind the extra crunch

Written by Raki Lyon
Categories: celebration, destiny, funny love, happiness, inspirational love, love, poetry,

The crispy crusty bread

The crispy crusty bread
Was as lonely as it gets
As handsome as he was
He had no bride to wed

The crispy crusty bread
He tries all that he can
But to woo a bride he can't
Except the rickety stickety jam

The crispy crusty bread
At last, at noon he said
By this time tomorrow
Bride or death, I'll have instead

The crispy crusty bread
At last,wooed a lass called butter
They had a wedding on the stars 
And lived happily ever after

Written by Alkas Poetry
Categories: allusion, boy, extended metaphor, humorous, imagery,

Boy In Charge of Buying Bread

daily I went to  Roldan' bakery
task that I performed with mastery
 it rained the bag of bread  wet...
to solve  it  I doffed my shirt
   bread safe... was applauded for bravery