Funny Poems About Brother or Brother Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Brother poems and/or funny poems about Brother. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Brother funny poems!

Written by Skat A
Categories: adventure, brother, fantasy, funny, funny love, giggle

Monkey See

Monkey See~

There once was a monkey named Frank
Who loved to walk the plank
He said too many jokes
Pulled too many hoaxe-s 
Ha! Ha! Ha! Then he got a good spank

*

Who's that monkey in front of me
I dare to hang with you on a tree
Oh! What I do? Will you do?
Together we are like glue
Is that my flea or your flea?

~ Skat ~

Contest~

Written by Andrea Dietrich
Categories: funny,

Brother Told Us

Brother told us sometimes that he peed
sitting down with a good book to read,
but with his ding-a-ling
he was having a fling
when we spied on him.  Good book indeed!


Written 5/20/14 for Roy Jerden's Bawdy, Bawdy, Bawdy, Miss Clawdy Limerick Contest

By the way, from comments I am getting, I need to let everyone know this is simply a fabrication. My brother told us nothing, and we never spied on him. And our small bathroom shared by ten people would not have suited this purpose! hahaha


Written by Victor Nwakanma
Categories: brother, freedom, giving, happy, humorous,

One Race

The firmament above, beneath we exist,
This diversity in divine artistry
Same eyes divers sizes
Different skin same sin
Different color same honor
Same human same humor
Why try to sort out maize from corn? They are all same
Cus just one shot, your race wont spare you

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: brother, conflict, humorous, sister,

My Bedroom

Daddy look at this place Mommy said it’s a disgrace cos nothing’s in the right place the floor’s an obstacle race and my best book on space isn’t in the book case BUT my kid sister Grace is lurking on the staircase she’s got a grin on her face - That smile I’d like to erase! Daddy I can only assume she’s been in my bedroom As she can now reach the door Daddy I’ve warned her before One day there’s gonna be war! Daddy just hear my plea Please please give me a key Then I can lock my sister out And then mommy won’t shout… At me! Look At This Place! Poetry Contest Sponsored by Matt Caliri 04/12/21

Written by Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories: children, funny, wisdom,

- Seven Years and Big Brother -

I am 7 years old and have already learned a lot
as ...
"God's wife is called Godmother
  She is the mother of all her grandchildren:
  Noah, Jesus and Santa Claus "

This is my second year at school
"All children start with clean hands"

(laughter ......... :)

By the way
  ... do you know?
"Grandmothers have very big bra
They are so big that
I get the whole butt and two knees into one bowl
... the second my brother can use a cradle "









From the child's mouth :)

02.02.2018
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved


Written by Cona Adams
Categories: angst, brother, children, clothes, family, funny

School Days

(and long brown stockings) 

I detest these stockings,
they're coarse, brown and ugly.

I hate the garters more;
elastic circles that cut off 
circulation and fail to halt 
the laddering down my skinny legs.

If only . . . I picture myself
in warm jeans and no teasing
from Tommy Rogers.

I put the garters to better use,
roll the repulsive stockings
down around my ankles. 

Tommy taunts,
"Who gave you
jointed toothpicks for legs?"

I lost it.

Now, Tommy has a black eye
and my nose is in the corner.

Written by Darlene Gifford
Categories: baby, brother, funny, pollution,

He's Fully Loaded

Stinky-Butt crawls
like a snail and leaves a trail.
My baby brother.




.

Written by Richard Karr
Categories: funny, brother, brother, farm,

If I Beat You To the Barn

Farm boys, farm boys, go and do your chores
Better take your hat for it’s sunny out-of-doors
Farm boys, farm boys, gotta milk those cows
Milk-em twice a day and feed the hungry sows
Make your mother butter in the butter churn
Argue with your brother when you think it’s not your turn
Measure off the distance you both will have to run
Where it is you’ll need to go to get the milking done
Toe the mark to challenge your brother at the gate
Divvy up the pails to balance out the weight
Farm boys being farm boys down there on the farm
And you’ll milk the cows if I beat you to the barn

Written by Joseph Spence Sr
Categories: brother, funny, history, imagination, mystery, visionary

Big Little Oxymoronic Foot

Bigfoot had a bubbling baby brother—
They labeled him "lively little foot!"

© Joseph S. Spence, Sr., (Epulaeryu Master) 5/25/2010
All Rights Reserved, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Senior Advisor, to Founder of Motivational Strips
Ambassador De Literature
Noble Star of Literature 2018
Living Legend of the 21st Century
Pentasiv B World Friendship Poetry Featured Poet 2019

Written by John Williams
Categories: children, funny,

Clean Sister, Dirty Brother

Leany Reany was so cleany,
She bathed five times a day,
She washed herself with ropey soapy
After every little play.
Dirty Burty was so shirty
When he had to take a shower,
He washed himself with muddy buddy,
Never smelling like a flower.


-more poems like this can be found at:

kidscomedypoetry.com.au

Written by Jimmi Canada
Categories: brother, caregiving, crazy, dark, funny, goodbye

Maturity

Two prates,

sick paste,

wanton waste,

yet terrible brain.


One more way,

for me in the daze,

then the song with the wait,

then the bong and your faith-

yes it's gone,
but no you're still to gait-

you're still to frame,

you're still to blame.

Written by Cona Adams
Categories: brother, childhood, funny,

Only Brother

He was the eldest,
tall, handsome, all knowing 
(by his own assessment).

He could roll a ‘guide and wheel’
all the way to school
without a stop. That wheel
kept rolling as if by magic.

He could shimmy up a tree
in search of wild grapes.

He could swim in deep water,
catch snakes for pets.

He could hunt squirrels with Dad,
shoot a 22 rifle.

He could milk a cow,
hitch a horse to the wagon.

He could zing you, square on,
with a dry corn cob.

He could run barefoot 
through woods, creeks, fields,
and over dirt roads.

But he missed the rafter,
fell through to the floor below,
knocked himself out cold,
chasing his cat through the attic.

Written by Joyce Johnson
Categories: brother, funny,

When Daddy Did the Cooking

My brother was first at the table
to pile six pancakes on his plate.
I don’t know how he stayed so skinny
given the enormous amount that he ate.
My daddy had made the hot syrup
from white sugar or so he had thought.
After one bite my brother was choking,
hair rising as though he’s besot.
Then Dad yelled ,”Don’t pour the syrup. 
Instead of sugar, I grabbed Epsom Salt. "


Won No. 5

Written by J.W. Earnings
Categories: brother, confusion, funny, life, brother, brother

Feet Burn

While doing sit-ups,
My big, arrogant brother stomps on my feet
“That burns my feet, bro!!”

While in recital, My oldest brother motions to stop clapping …My hands are red, bro…

Written by Jacob Cra
Categories: brother, christmas, funny,

I Personally Know a Monster

*Please note: This poem was written for MY brother this Christmas. He is twelve w/braces.
He annoys me twenty-four seven!
And sometimes I can’t even sleep!
Especially when he snores and claims
in the morning that he didn’t make a peep!

He is filthy, disgusting, and appalling!
Picking food out of his mouth after  meals!
Often I think he is crazy!
I mean c’mon... he doesn’t even walk on his heels!

But no matter how strange he is,
Nasty and smelling like scat,
I've got to put up with his vexation
because he’s my brother and I kinda have to love him for that.

Written by Robert Ronnow
Categories: brother, clothes, death, hope, humor, morning

Brother Death

Even in the last days you need clean clothes; 
therefore you may be found in the laundry
mornings, small task against the larger one
of not breathing. With simple joy
men may forget to fear their deaths.
Six inches of snow reminds us of its dominance
in a pleasant way. Coming and going of sleep, 
circling of the moon around the earth, earth
around the sun. The great man dies
and this makes death more noble for us all.
It is with joy that I accept the pains
that herald my end. I do my job well.
I go to the well and break the ice for water.
The bucket comes up full of dying wonder.

Written by William Krichbaum
Categories: humor,

Ol Brother Cadence

Wish in one hand and crap in the otherrrrr,
       pick which one you would give to your brotherrrrr.

Written by Jen H.
Categories: brother, family, funny

It!

A sibling for me
I don't feel very lucky
I sell IT for free!

Written by Kate Sparks
Categories: brother, child, children, daughter, funny, humor

Little Willy

Little Willy mad as hell
pushed his sister in the well.
mother said while drawing water
it's so hard to raise a daughter!

Written by Nikki Reynolds
Categories: brother, friend, funny, growing up, kid, sister

Bad Kids

Little Joyce Ann and her friend Glenn
decided to play a trick one day
They took a rope and each grabbed an end,
then laid it across the alleyway

They hid in the bushes on each side
and waited for just the right time
One on the left and one on the right 
waiting patiently for him to come by

Then came Little Johnny on his bike,
riding without a care
Right on time they snatched the rope tight
and flipped Little Johnny up in the air

Written by Andrew Crisci
Categories: brother, family, funny, world war ii,

Greaser

You didn't go to fight World War II in Japan,
You didn't ever go to FAT CITY,
but smooched with a DOLLY
in my washed and waxed Chevy van!


Looking like a real DUCK-BUTT,
you have the looks of a clown, not a CAT...
staring at that long-legged PAPER-SHAKER!
Eat more cereal, ANKLE-BITER!


You didn't learn to drive and lead,
for a grown man that's a NOSE-BLEED!
You didn't go to those night BASHES...
never being attracted to fake eyelashes!


GREASER, PILE-UP-Z'S or GET A LIGHTER!
Put down the HORN you bought at the Country Fair;
don't answer back as you usually do...CUT-THE-GAS,
or AGITATE-THE GRAVEL with quick toes!

Written by CayCay Jennings
Categories: brother, chocolate, funny, giggle, halloween, humorous

Naughty Brother Bobby

Inspired by Real Life Brother Billy, My Halloween Candy Thief
Every year when it is sweet Halloween time, my selfish big brother commits the same crime - he quick gobbles his candy and then steals mine! I can't tell cause my parents will say I whine so, this Halloween my mean brother, Bobby, will feel regret and correct his theft hobby. Tonight, this sis is a sinister zombie who will see Bro turn squatty, potty sorry! I foil wrapped sweets he favs as delicious – he will soon steal Exlax-styled Hershey kisses. By the time naughty Bobby grows suspicious his guts will have already turned most vicious!

Written by Arthur Vaso
Categories: appreciation, brother, fate, humorous, psychological,

King Arthur's Proclamation

I knight thee
master chef of the Royal S Soup
let them pick their poison
and serve them their just desserts
little cupcakes hiding in the pan
why even peter was more of a man
Every kings chef has a great kitchen
The masons have built you a great stoic oven
lets put this to good use
after we shall have an ale or two
along with some laughs
leprechauns and trolls we turned
to ash

Written by Randy Johnson
Categories: brother, food, fruit, funny, humor,

That Damn Peach

My peach tree only had one peach and my brother decided to pick it.
I grabbed it out of his hand and you know where I decided to stick it.
My brother was really pissed.
He had to go to a Proctologist.
He took me to court and the judge ordered me to pay the doctor for removing the peach from his ***.
That made me very mad and I started giving that judge sass.
I threw a punch at the judge when he held me in contempt.
But he had a black belt in karate and now I walk with a limp.
When it came to that damn peach, I should've let my brother eat it.
This has been a bad experience and I sure as hell will never repeat it.

(This is a fictional poem)

Written by Dennis Sheffer
Categories: birth, brother, care, funny,

Small Tid-Bits These Days

Could we engage further through attempting light
Can the light make us kiss under the sun again
Should we be so close that the gravity hurts
Akin to two massive bodies that split each other in half 
(Saturn and Jupiter)
Will the love of self be overshadowed by a greater sense
Of the perfect need to be amazing 
Do we move with the motivation of the gods
Has the new language made sense to no one
As the wind moves across the frontal lobe
The cortex keeps it incredible 
A fifth dimensional kiss within a dream