Humorous and funny Cancer poems and/or funny poems about Cancer. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Cancer funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Cancer Poems.
anti bullying, appreciation, cancer, cry, faith, humor, hurt,
Come into my house,
Sit anywhere you like.
No, not at my table,
No, not on my chair.
Come into my house,
I invited you,
I opened up my home.
Oh, I changed my mind,
It is a vaulted tome.
Come into my house,
You really are not welcome.
You are a phantom guest,
And a sadly, unwanted pest,
It is a perfect place,
You should have been more proud,
Just to be invited,
And permitted, in the crowd.
With rules and hidden spaces.
And a common thought out plan,
You do not fit, so do not sit,
friendship, funny, life, love, cancer,
Sitting in the backseat ~ yackety
she drives like
crackers ~ wackedy
speeding to the movies?
we can’t be late?
Driver ahead asleep at the
panic stop she makes ~ 5 seatbelts lock
backlash! ........... flying wig
plops smack in my lap . . . .
Screaming fits of laughter all around.
Late to the movies after all,
not nearly as good.
Dedicated to my friend, Kate.
Breast cancer survivor.
body, cancer, humorous, husband,
My hair is dyed to hide the grey and how my boobies sag
But I have it on good authority I’m a ‘Walnut Wag’
A ‘Walnut Wag’ … what’s that you may ask
I will enlighten you for that’s my task
A ‘Walnut Wag’ is the partner of someone with prostate cancer
This cancer can be cured so don’t let your man be a chancer
From our experience early detection is the key
With treatment your man can be cancer free
15th January 2016
body, cancer, health, humorous,
Squashed like two pancakes
Mammograms detect cancer
Please kiss me better
Follow up to my mammogram poem – my poor aching ‘Bristol Cities’
body, cancer, emotions, humor, memory, pain, remember,
My transport is broken, it's falling apart
well, physically speaking I mean
Rust and corrosion, abuse and neglect
add up to a miserable scene
Headaches and pain, and depression and such
all taking their toll on it too
But there's part of the mind, that no trauma can touch
the part that is pulling me through
I can still travel, though walking is hard
and I can still fight through the pain
I can still see, all those wonderful things
The ones that I've stored in my brain
Nourishment comes, from the back of my mind
That place where my memories are kept
Bringing me pleasure and happiness too
Once all the cobwebs are swept.....
courage, dark, dedication, farewell, forgiveness, funny, hope, cancer,
Today is Doomsday.
Some believe today is Doomsday
Some say maybe the end of the year
However, do we really care?
How would the earth end?
In a ball of fire or
would it swallow us up into puff of dust
in a matter of an hour..
I rather am buried under pile of snow.
Eternal Preservation "what a nice way to go
However do we have option in a world?
Where lunatics have taken over asylums
where deranged souls spreading like a social cancer
Is doomsday the answer..?
funny, women, women, cancer,
Women over fifty
need to have a mammogram yearly,
It is an important test
that involves squeezing a woman's breast.
It is for cancer screening
but leaves some women really screaming,
Place your breast on machine which
clamps down on it like a fish sandwich.
Then it's tender to the touch
not many women like this too much,
I do believe it's a man
who invented this type of torture plan.
Why don't they screen men this way
put their member on this thing I say,
Then prostate cancer will flee
I'm just laughing at this imagery!
body, cancer, humorous, poetry,
So my poems may not be perfect
And some of them don’t even rhyme
I write about poop and farting
But scatology is not a crime
I don’t know a person who has never done a pooh
So I’ll continue to write poems about going to the loo
On a serious note bowel cancer has killed three of my dad’s family
So I’ll always have a vested interest on the topic of scatology
There once was a man born under Cancer
Who was a lover and also a dancer
The girls he would waltz
With devious thoughts
The Cancer dancer wants to depants her
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
america, anger, cancer, humor, mental illness, patriotic, political,
There once was a bully named Ump
With broom handle stuck up his Rump
He bragged, "I'm a rat!"
And they voted for that
As they scavenged for food at the dump.
confusion, funny, life, mystery, on writing and words, cancer,
RUT- that's the title,
Insanity- I'm a disciple.
You guys make me think,
in ways untried,
I'll treasure this site,
until I've died.
And maybe even after that,
How many lives for this cat?
Survived cancer twice,
And though it was not nice,
Worse pain I've suffered
Those sharp knives
that pierce the soul,
From anger seemingly
out of control,
Eight inch switchblade scar,
Which my skin did so mar
I hear words I question why said,
As if one were brain dead,
Like "that door is ajar.."
How crazy you think you are?
A door is a door,
A jar is a jar,
No way to confuse them
No matter who you are...
A brain just too lazy,
Or one who's simply crazy?
body, cancer, humorous,
a theme we can write about -
I write poop poems
(some folk may prefer this alternative ending! )
Jan's poems are poop
a small testing kit
will plop through your letterbox
it’s simple to do
just three smears of pooh
for bowel cancer screening
it could save your life
this cancer can be treated ...
don't leave it too late!
if you should notice
a change in bowel habits
then get it checked out
don't be embarrassed
get to the bottom of things ...
dying for a pooh?
joke about their condition
appreciation, cancer, humor,
Tall IV polls pass in the hall
Outside the patient bathroom
The owners flash smiles
Ignoring the wires
Basic society 101
Smiling While Pole Dancing Artimus (C) Susan Manley 11/13/2023