Humorous and funny Care poems and/or funny poems about Care. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Care funny poems!
Written by
Anais Vionet
Categories:
11th grade, care, christmas, feelings, holiday, humor
Old Fashioned Christmas
It’ll be an old fashioned Christmas,
with Santa due down the chute.
I bet he Purells his reindeer,
and Lysols his hazmat suit.
It’s an old fashioned Christmas.
We’ll all have on our masks,
and our muffled yuletide carols,
will be just like seasons past.
We’ll observe all the guidelines.
We’ll eat six feet apart.
We’ll have disinfectant under the mistletoe,
and keep safety in our hearts.
Sure, it’s an old fashioned Christmas.
One unique to the times.
The love this year might be careful,
but the feelings are genuine.
Written by
David Aaron
Categories:
allusion, care, funny, humor, imagery, pain
Fourteen
When someone says break
A leg is never offered
As the sacrifice
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
anger, care, celebration, drug, humor, relationship
I love and kiss the CVS people
I’ll get to the pills with a twist
The scripts filled by my pharmacist
If there’s a hiccup
Delaying the pick-up
Watch out as I might just get pissed
Written by
Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories:
body, care, feelings, humor,
- Star World X- Rays -
No one asks how you feel
Ready for some squishing
Cold hands that tugs and pulls
The breast is squeezed down and keep me captive
First right breast ~ left breast the same treatment
Totally humiliated, with you head glued to this Star World X-rays
I am sure that this machine was created by a man
Ten minutes you're done ~ your worst enemy is breast cancer
24.08.2016
- Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
- Published in the Newspaper 29.08.2016
Written by
Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories:
beauty, care, humorous, truth,
- Poem For Women -
Small or large breasts is something one is born with
It is easy to become blinded by the glamorous fashion
The quest for the perfect body
It's all about illusion
Focus on what is good for your body
New breasts can cost you dearly
No one need operations,
be grateful for the breasts you have
Most of the breasts hanging down ...
sooner or later
19.01.2017
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
(unrhymed couplets)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
Written by
Michael Ward
Categories:
body, care, confusion, funny, health, life
Ear Plug
I swallowed an earplug down my left ear and I said to my wife I can't hear and she said we will have to go and see doctor Ofreea Who gave me a prescription for 4 cans of beer which will have to be drunk here in case you feel *****.
So I drank down the beer and I never felt *****
And doctor Ofraya said the plug in my ear should disappear
But it hadn't so doctor Ofreea gave me another prescription for 12 cans of beer
Which we both drank until it was clear we could be here until mid year
Let's have another look down your ear said doctor Ofreea
And he declared I was right it has now disappeared and i replied
But doctor Ofreea
your looking down the wrong ear.
Written by
Scott Harris
Categories:
appreciation, funny, imagery, together, uplifting,
Take Good Care of Your Egg
Aww, a blanket of men
With 18 hands
And happy feet
Around me stands
By smokey fires
Like a hippy
And keep me warm
When it gets nippy
Deep inside the penguin pile
Absorbing love, burrow and smile
18 arms and 18 legs
8 men and one happy egg :-)
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
care, funny, funny love, good morning, good night, goodbye
The Oversized Plastic Coffee Cup Says
The oversized
Plastic coffee cup
with the plastic lid
says
Caution!
I am hot and wet
Handle me with care
Do not microwave
Written by
Jack Clark
Categories:
care, character, humor, humorous, love, together
You's and Me's
It’s not “I’ll do what I can”,
That defines for women, her man
Nor his strength
Nor hair length.
It’s the “you’s” ... not me’s” ... of his plan
Written by
Lorenthia Clayton
Categories:
care, character, friendship, funny, silly, simple
Nancy, My Friend
You're kind of silly, and quiet too
You smell like chili and bird poo
This poem seems mean but its really nice
I hear your room is full of mice
Your hair is curly like my favorite fries
You've got booger brains in your eyes
Okay Ill stop now you're really my friend
& this poem has come to an end!
Written by
Derrick Shane
Categories:
care, cute love, funny love, kiss, love, lust
Hey Cutie
Your sheer arrogance makes me giggle
Your butt does the cutest wiggle
I really hope you like me
I want to call you baby
Or maybe my little piggle.
:)
Written by
Mariam Traore
Categories:
care, courage, funny, school, stress, truth
Idiots Like You
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Idiots like you,
belong in a school'
Don't get upset,
I went there too,
I passed all my classes,
cuz I was smarter than you,
But hey don't you worry'
You wont be one for long'
Just pass all your classes,
Go on what you waiting for,
an invitation?
No I don't think so
go right now.
Written by
Mary Jane Randall
Categories:
anger, best friend, betrayal, care, funny love, hip hop
Empty Words
Did you hope I wouldn't notice you gave me empty words to drink?
well my tongues tasted more lies
than you would ever dare to think of.
You're not the only one with truth like poison in their veins.
whose ribs are shaped like cage
holding tightly to the pain
I knew even touched that wretched cup
pour a glass of words to cover what you hide
perhaps don't leave your secrets clinging tightly
to the side
but then again empty words.
Written by
Ayesha Karim
Categories:
black african american, care, caregiving, child, childhood, giggle
Mama
Mama
I was only five years old,
getting my hair pressed for the first time.
I heard my mother’s voice.
She was reading to me as she was pressing my hair.
Mama always called me “my-Esha”.
She was so kind a woman.
She still is.
All the people I knew as friends called me Esha.
My family did too.
Mama would wash my hair and then press it.
The pressing comb would get very hot.
The sides would singe with steam and heat from the pressing comb.
The back of my hair was my least favorite part to get pressed.
She knew it and we joked about it when she was threw fixing my hair.
Written by
Emma Anonymous
Categories:
children, funny,
A Bear Care
There once existed a fierce bear
Nothing with anybody would he share
Then one day he cried
Because friends he denied
Then he vowed to always play fair
Written by
Jean Murray
Categories:
care, celebration, humorous, , persona,
My Psychiatrist
My psychiatrist makes me laugh,
because he laughs at me.
I have a odd personality you see.
He laughed when I told him
my heart almost burst.
From stress of course.
I'm better now in mind and body.
My gaiety must be infectious.
He laughed and became raucous.
We agreed it was best
if we met no more.
Then laughed some more.
Thank you Dr. O Donnell,
For looking after me so well.
Letting me have a voice.
Treating me so swell.
It's thrilling to be in control
of my mind once more.
Written by
Terri Cannan
Categories:
care, cheer up, depression, divorce, encouraging, funny
Bee
I'm changing my name to bee. I'm busy as a bee. Cooking meals, paying the bills and then there's the groceries. Floors to sweep, floors to mop and the laundry too. So much to get done, always on the run. I'm busy as a bee.
I'm busy as a bee. Doctors appointments and physical therapy. Wash the car and fill up with gas. Taking out the trash. Watching the clock, no time to stop. Gotta move fast.
I'm busy as a bee. Takes my mind off of me. Life's too short to sit in self pity, so if I'm feeling down I guess I best get up and get busy.
Written by
Phatt Matt
Categories:
beautiful, care, deep, funny, humorous, love
One of Those Wonders
Through strength
I found love
in time I’ll find what I was looking for
I feel like a man at a bar
that has been there for too long
it is going to take a lot
to drag me away from the counter
there is nothing that a thousand men can ever do
I will fight for you
listen to my heart every time you want to run away
I am doing time
taking my mind right back to you
when I hear that whistle blow
it is those wonders
when you listen to meddling rain
let me love you
heart of darkness is brought to the light with your love
I know your troubled heart let me blow your cares away
M.CUPIDO
Written by
Aj Merlino
Categories:
funny, care, care,
Barack Obama
Is it true Barack Obama?
Is it true you caused national drama?
Now I’m not one to judge
But from what I see, you need a departing nudge
I feel that you only care about yourself
You only care about the merits on your shelf
But lets be honest Mr. President
Do you really think another term is evident?
I guess we’ll have to wait and see,
What we receive in two thousand and thirteen
Written by
Mark J. Halliday
Categories:
care, friendship, funny love, girlfriend, love, wife
Don'T Jinx It
Whatever you do, don’t jinx it!
Don’t mess up something pointlessly!
If it isn’t broke, don’t fix it!
I’ve heard these words repeatedly.
I tend to over analyze--
(Whatever you do, don’t jinx it!)
Not a good thing, I realize.
She loves you. Don’t over-think it.
Her heart is tender. Don’t break it!
Even though this might sound sappy.
Whatever you do, don’t jinx it!
Do your best to keep her happy.
One day she might end up your wife;
If you break her heart, then fix it!
In case she’s the love of your life,
Whatever you do, don’t jinx it!
Written by
Anindya Mohan Tagore
Categories:
care, funny, love, poetry,
Forty
I love women at forty
Because they too become snorty
Now whom to complain dear...
Equality expels all my fear
Forty makes you more matured
Love bond makes us endured
Now finding poetry in you...
Living poetry gives me cue
25.01.16
Written by
Al Juman
Categories:
beautiful, care, dog, funny, garden, heartbroken
Said Hyacinth
Said Hyacinth
Shadow is in my garden again.
That Ugly chubby plumb British bulldog.
Why can't the Hamilton's keep her over there.
This a place for birds, bees
and gently dragon fly.
Yet comes this slob rubbing up on my roses.
You rascal!
Just look at you,
sprawled legs scattered up in the air
soaking in the sunshine.
Never mind,
just take your fat overfed self and run along.
Yes I am talking to You!
© Al. Juman The "said" Poet 6/24/2016
Written by
Reynaldo Mast
Categories:
care, clothes, fear, funny, health, humor
My Own Foot Quote
Washing your feet do not smell
You will be alive to tell
With soap smell of rose
Keeps your feet compose
Wear shoes that fit well
Written by
Juan Ramirez
Categories:
care, friendship, funny love, i love you,
My Best Friend
the most unstable best friends/
together till life's end/
You are the tornado/
And I am the volcano/
we clash and it's epic
We hurt, need a medic
It's a beautiful disaster, I love the way it hurts/
I'm a bad person I guess, the pain is just desserts/
But I love it when we laugh, the connection is so real/
Our friendship is everlasting, my heart enjoys the feel/
learned that not to screw with Alexis/
She's tougher to mess with than Texas/
Written by
Sheila Van Zant
Categories:
allusion, care, confusion, emotions, fantasy, funny
Random Thoughts
We are about to take a journey thru random thoughts that cannot hide;
As long as I have known you I write you letters in my mind;
To tell you how I feel, to tell you whats inside;
I never cease to wonder how little that you know;
You bungle trip and blunder and make up your own show;
You seek and justify to me those things you keep inside;
But all in all you see I take it all in stride;
Not trying to deceive by hiding whats in me;
All the words I wrote to you still linger in my brain;
Wondering if you'd read them or hear them just the same;
Promises you've broken so many and so vast;
I wish I was 6 foot 7 and I'd just kick your *******!!!!!!