Humorous and funny Cat poems and/or funny poems about Cat. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Cat funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Cat Poems.
funny, pets, cat, cat,
I have a cat
A real fat cat
My cat is all black
My black fat cat
It is a cat with a knack
A true fact about my cat
My fat black cat
She has a knack to catch a rat
My all black cat brought me the rat
This is why my cat is a fat black cat
So rats watch your back
From my cat with the knack
Or you will become a snack for my fat black cat
From Life of Cat
From life of a cat what can we learn?
Never have seen one wearing a sunburn
Our cat we do have that does exist
Seems to think he is a ventriloquist.
Took meow test and great grade he made;
To write poems even tried to persuade
Sweet and low chariot was met by a meow
And what I am about to learn no one knew.
In our house, cat has a humble place to live
Sufficient food and water to him, we will give
But when he wants to eat by himself alone
He likes ice cream served on a crunchy cone.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
So where is the cat poem contest at?
Mrs. River got a black cat named Mr. Right
The day her husband disappeared from sight
Now neighbors all shiver
Is Mr. Right—Mr. River?
And what spell might she cast Halloween night?
Carol Louise Moon
Hot Night, Cold Milk
The night was hot, I couldn't fall asleep
and so I rose to get a glass of milk.
I tiptoed past the cat who slept so sound
and envied her the ease in which she slept.
She woke and followed slippers down the hall.
The milk I poured was for myself, alone.
Her eyes a perfect glow, a begging plead
convinced me that the milk was really hers--
(a half a cup and nothing more for me.)
She lapped and lapped until was satisfied.
And I, a sleepy dupe, hauled off to bed.
animals, funny, pets
Sprawling over bedsheets
Crowding limited sleepspace with
Tiddles didn’t like his new tinned tea
Self catering cat
Caught in the rain
Time for a sneaky sleep
March of the Footles Contest Sponsor Timothy Hicks
oh lovely bed, dishevelled bed,
warm and cosy snuggle bed
too nice to get out of bed
too big for one it should be shared
crisp clean sheets, to curl the toes bed,
pack of pillows for my head.
duvet to wrap around me, bed
wish you served meals, need to be fed.
coffee and toast make it a special bed
crumbs to lie on, isn’t good it’s said
best you throw me out, get a shower,
oh bed, can I sneak back in an hour,
my bed I love you.
Penned 11th April 2013
adventure, best friend, cat, crazy, cute love, friendship, funny,
March 21, 2015
you shan't win
not this day my furry friend
watch me run
head start - yeah!
close to end he leaps down ledge
watch him fly
wins and rubs it in my face
prissy proud prance
cat, children, fantasy, fun, humor,
I Do not want a window seat .
I do not want to freeze my feet..
I do not want a waiter cat .
I do not like his pin striped hat..
I do not want him to touch my food.
And how he speaks is down right Rude..
So won't you take my order Jerry.
I know the menu, and I'm in quite the hurry..
Scrapple , egg and cheese on toast,
that is the meal I love the most..
The tall cat can have his green eggs and ham.
He's not from Philly but Sam I Am..
animal, cat, humorous,
Here kitty, kitty. Come out and play
I have a new bow for you today
You tore the blue one out so quick
With angry paw…you seemed quite ticked!
I want to dress you and show you off
So all the other bows I now have tossed
No purple or green to match your eyes
Or orange, nor pink that you despise
Polk-a-dots were just not right for you
You tore them to shreds a time or two
No stripes or plaids are in my hand
For these I know you could not stand
The white one was lost in your white fur
When it came out you purred and purred
Here kitty, kitty, now don’t you tease
I’ve a red one here that’s sure to please
Written for “Hello Kitty (World)” members contest.
M. L. Kiser
animal, cat, humor, pets, poems, poetry,
Ah, sweet slumber of nip-laden dreams;
the milk of mother moon bestowed,
a blessed drink and lactose-free
to this mine humble, feline throat.
Running freely through outer space,
I touch upon thy blessed universe.
My home of emerald and lapis lace,
is where in I lay in furred repose.
Chasing neon rainbows in nebulae bright,
my dreams are filled with gold doubloons.
I’ll spend them on treats and nip-delight,
and chase away any greedy tycoons.
A feline black as obsidian night,
in a home filled with human love;
among the faeries and tree sprites,
mind flies just like the doves.
bird, cat, humorous, tree,
He listened for them, in the wood
as daylight blossomed, poised to prowl
For breakfast, breast meat sounded good
and Cat could feel his stomach growl
Soon, struck by a cacophany
of cheeps and chirps, of coos and caws,
Cat snuck up on them, tree by tree
and hushed each cluck with teeth and claws
They, unobservant, were plucked clean
from every nook where they would sing
Think; had they looked, they might have seen
him slink toward them - and took wing!
When Cat had eaten every bird,
he retched a ball of beaks and feet,
then stretched out on their bones and purred,
at peace atop the spongey peet...
Tiddles didn’t really like the new cat food
The result of the new cat food
BUT THEN ….
Tiddles returns from a long walk in the rain
Contented Cat when towel dried
Any theme two liner – March 2017 Standard Contest
Sponsored by Brian Strand
Shark, the cat, is sitting catty-wampus today. He is a contortionist. His head is to the north,
His tail to the west, paws to the east, crossed in a southwesterly way, except for one which is
Somehow sticking up in the air like a lone feather. He is licking his Neverland region, as I step
Over him. At first when I noticed him on the porch, with all these extensions, I thought he was a
Fat, giant spider. Shark is an older cat, there is no way he should have this kind of agility, but
He does, and I am in awe.
bird, cat, humorous,
Knows Sylvester is sly
Of the cat he is wary
What a clever canary!
Will seethe and fester
When Tweety makes a mad dash
He exclaims 'suffering succotash!
Cleritoons Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Joseph May
cat, fun, humorous,
I walk toward you less and less,
cringe and hunch at your caress.
Outside oozes from your pores.
I steal my chance to get outdoors.
My eyes reflect the magic night.
Excitement bodes within my sight.
The winds of wildness set me free
on my first romantic spree.
My feline fancy, you’re the one.
In full moonlight we jump and run.
Lady, Lady, my sweet Lady
will you have my litter, Baby?
Where I live? It matters not.
Let’s enjoy, the time we’ve got.
I’m hanging loose, trying to be feral.
Oops just remembered, I’m fixed and sterile.
8/6/18 Marathon Mile 23 3rd Place
baby, grandchild, grandmother, grandparents, humor, humorous, relationship,
She was born with cat ears.
So cute! Everyone lied.
Some of us felt them.
They were striped, and furry.
Odd for a human head.
Gray, pink in the middle.
“Adorable!” some of us said.
“Can they be removed?” the new grandmother asked.
Making her daughter-in-law her enemy for life.
humor, word play,
THEY GAVE THE CAT A TONIC.....NOW HE IS.
John G. Lawless
M. L. Kiser
animal, cat, funny, nature, pets, poems, poetry,
My toilet paper
out of the bathroom,
throughout the whole house,
no, it is not trained.
If it were trained
I am certain
it would proudly
stay nice and neat.
My cat walks
Ronald D Thompson
cat, humorous, silly,
All I hear is 'kitty, kitty!’
Such a shame. Such a pity.
I want my food. That’s where I’m at.
After all, I’m just a cat!
cat, fun, humor,
my attempt at a simplistic limerick suite
"cats and hats"
I once went to the beach with hats
and noticed in the back seat were my cats
I couldn't leave them in the car
so we ended up sitting at the bar
later I placed them on cool mats
we stayed until the sun went down
in between they managed to be a clown
they nestled and played with my hats
in style as true diplomats
now for all it was a showdown
as our day was nearing end
we were happy and could not pretend
my cats were never alone
my love and patience had grown
but now my hats I need to mend
Feline on the Town
Tried to bathe cat in my kitchen sink,
She ran out the back door in a wink!
Kitty, my kitty,you are bad.
Too much beer you indeed had!
Here you recline in public,very stoned.
Taking you home right now, to atone!
animal, children, class, hilarious, homework, humor, pets,
I own a big fat cat-
The fattest for miles around.
Wherever there's lots of food,
that's where he'll be found.
He's really good at eating.
It's a talent, I suppose.
I'm sure if he keeps at it
He'd win the talent shows.
I own a big fat cat-
He weighs at least a ton
He couldn't run to save his life
Yes, he isn't much fun
His favourite room's the kitchen,
(I'm sure we all know why).
He eats just about everything,
So that's why with a sigh...
I'd like to tell you teacher,
I'd like to tell you straight,
I might have "accidentally" dropped
My homework in his plate.
cat, funny, horror,
There once was Princess the cat
Who found a big fat hairy rat
She brought it in to play
But mother said no way
And found her a very big metal bat
Harold Hunt sr
Who's knocking at my door?
I hear someone at the door.
But when I go I do not see one there.
The sound comes there once more.
Still no one there.
The door bell does not go off.
A knock I do hear.
I watch out the window once more.
And there to my surprise.
Was the old rocker hitting the shutter and the old cat rocking away.