Funny Poems About Child or Child Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Child poems and/or funny poems about Child. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Child funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Child Poems.

Poem Details | by Sneha Rv |
Categories: child, childhood, children, christian, christmas, funny, mom,

Keeping Mum

Reindeer wait
   by the pane
I see shapes

A present!
   Santa thinks
I’m asleep 

Smells like mum 
   lent Santa 
her perfume...  ?

Poem Details | by Annika Johnson |
Categories: child, childhood, family, humorous, sympathy, teacher, child, school, child, school,


Why does a child have to go to school?
Why do we have to spend so much time working?
This seems simply cruel.
Isn't it just irking?

Some people say school is important for learning
Couldn't a child learn on their own?
It would cause much less yearning,
After all, we can learn from our phones.

I can somewhat see a parents point in sending their child to school.
But why would you choose what we wear?
It just allows us to look like fools,
We may as well come to school bear.

As you can see school is not fair,
So please don’t force us to go if you care.

Poem Details | by Arthur Vaso |
Categories: 3rd grade, character, child, humor, humorous, introspection, urdu,


Long ago
a year or so
I received accolades a plenty
I won this, and I won that
I was on top of it all
I was almost the whole shebang
I was important
I was all about me
I pandered and pounded
I wanted attention and I won
I was sad, when my cheating was undone

Caught with the red herring deep in my mouth
I left to sulk a bit and have a wee pout
then I figured out after I was caught
there was a way to still receive
the praise I so sought
once a month
that's how she works
post only then
the egoists trophy is my new perk

Poem Details | by Line Gauthier |
Categories: child, fantasy, fun, humor, joy, spoken word, youth,

Joy Joy Joy

what ever is going on
in that joyful
little brain of yours

only six years old
and you’re brimming
with imagination
a vivacious fantasy world
in those big bright eyes
and words spewing out
like an overzealous fountain

a bottomless sense
of giddy humor
a full-blown half-pint comedian

AP: Honorable Mention 2020

Submitted on November 11, 2018 for STANDARD CONTEST NO.135 sponsored by BRIAN STRAND

Originally posted on November 7, 2018

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: child, food, funny, horror, murder, nursery rhyme, scary,

The Clown's Song

Bring me a child to eat
I'm too weak to stand on my feet
All I need is meat
So bring me a child to eat.

Poem Details | by Michael Degenhardt |
Categories: children, funny, happiness, nostalgia,

The Child In Me

Soda pop and gum drops
A river full, so sweet
To be that child I once was
All that candy, I would eat

Not worry about a cavity,
the dentist or my skin
Just concerned with getting more
And filling it within

A jawbreaker, some nonpareils
Bazookas and candy dots
Sour apples and baby ruths
Oh I love it all a lot

Poem Details | by Gail Debole |
Categories: child, children, cute, humor, innocence, kid, mother,

The Wrinkle Mystery

Written on 9/26/2022
Updated on 9/27/2022
by Gail DeBole

The young boy was watching his mom
Straighten sheets on his bed with her palms.
He began scratching his head
Looked at the floor and his bed
And seemed to be mildly alarmed.

The young boy who was not quite four, 
Said, “The wrinkles are not on the floor.
It did not take long 
For them to be gone,
But why did they not fall to the floor?"

Poem Details | by Caren Krutsinger |
Categories: child, humor,

These Mashed Potatoes Are Bleeding

“These mashed potatoes are bleeding,” the six-year old said.
I looked at them, curiously.  
A white mound with a bit of yellow.
No gravy or ketchup.
A curious observation, I thiought,
pondering it.
“Just go with it, Grandma,” her nine-year-old sister told me.
So I did.

Poem Details | by Kim Rodrigues |
Categories: child, humorous,

The Reeling Batmobile


Batman unmasked -  a child
sits in the reeling batmobile.

“Grandma, your Superman”
“Okay,”  I say,

“Then who’s Grandpa?”
The three year old replies:

“He’s Wonder Woman,”
The car roars with laughter.


Poem Details | by Subimal Sinha-Roy |
Categories: child, christmas, humorous,

Santa and Christmas Tree

My small grandson heard friends say in fun spree, Santa can change to what he wants to be. He asked me, face worried stiff- who would bring him his gifts if, Santa decides to become Christmas tree.
November 23, 2019 Syllable count : 10/10/7/7/10 Checked in Contest : Holiday Themed Limerick Sponsor : Tania Kitchin

Poem Details | by Paula Goldsmith |
Categories: child, dog, food, humor, love, sleep, smile,


Quote By Poet "Puppies and kittens are what little kids dreams are made of." 

My puppy is tan and small,
she likes to sleep in mommy's shawl.
She loves to play ball,
while I play with my doll.
We like to play outside,
where she will run and hide.
I will put her in my doll buggy for a ride,
her smile becomes a mile wide.
It's time to go inside,
dinner is ready with chicken that has been fried.

Poem Details | by Hidden Sister |
Categories: child, humorous, slam, son,

Teenage Blues

My whinny,crabby, hungry teen
Your stinky,spoiled and quite mean
You want, you need, you have to have
The latest,newest, modern fad

Your greasy, grimy, hands smear
My wall, light switches, and the mirror
Empty snack bags,with sweet and sour
Create tall,extensive buildings that tower

Your messy,your dirty,in need of a shower
Please make it quick,not loiter an hour
Your smelly,nasty, disgusting shoes
Are slowly  poisoning every room

Even with big mouth,rolling eyes and sighs
I would not trade you, I surmise

Poem Details | by Briana Williams |
Categories: character, child, children, kids, fun, funny, giggle,

Spongebob Squarepants: Patrick Star Sonnet

Patrick Star is quite an odd ole starfish. 

Considering he’s a star, pointy, and bright pink. 

The Krabby Patty is one of his favorite dish. 

Bikini Bottom know that Patrick stink. 

Only a job at the Chum Bucket and Krusty Krab. 

Patrick loves to be with his friend SpongeBob.

He always go to Sandy’s to destroy her lab. 

Patrick eat and chews on nasty pink gum blob.

Run to Squidward who despises yellow. 

Patrick loves to fish at Jellyfish Fields. 

Plankton find Patrick to be extremely slow. 

Secretes from SpongeBob was very concealed. 

Patrick Star does live under a brown rock.

Patrick Star will always give you an shock.

Poem Details | by Smail Poems |
Categories: age, angel, baseball, beauty, butterfly, caregiving, celebration, character, child, father daughter, feelings, film, fishing, flower, football, children, for her, friend, fun, funny, gender, girl, girlfriend, giving, graduation, grandfather, grandmother, grandparents, growing up, growth, hair, happiness, happy, health, heart, hero,


Pretty princesses
Dancing all around
Frolicking through fields
Very beautiful
Just like you!

Poem Details | by Khalil Franklin |
Categories: black african american, child, childhood, children, food, children, funny, metaphor, middle school, social,

Oodles of Joy

"Oodles of Joy"
In the morning of everyday i 
I make a food that's really 
Crunch'em, rip'em, and pour'em out 
As saliva pools form in my 
Put it in the mic for just about 
Impatiently  watching those 
beautiful noodles waiting for 
When the time Is up
I Pop it open and take them out 
And start shoving "Oodle's of 
Noodles" into my mouth. 
Khalil Wali

Poem Details | by Anthony Scandrick Ii |
Categories: anniversary, baby, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, child, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, freedom, goodbye, graduation, growing up, happiness, hope, humorous, lonely, lost love, love, mystery, passion, satire, slam, sorrow, sorry, success, suicide, teen, thank you, uplifting, write,

Dear Michelle

You almost had me,
I wanted you,
The way you stuck to me like super glue,
I was feeling you,
But I knew,
I could never have you,
But, the way you looked at me,
The way my body pleads,
We can never be,
Because I’m too old,
And your only thirteen.

Poem Details | by Laura Breidenthal |
Categories: beautiful, child, childhood, children, emotions, family, feelings, kids, giggle, growing up,

Water Balloons

stretching it
balloon breaks on faucet
spray giggles


Poem Details | by Arlene Smith |
Categories: funny, drug,

Flower Child

psychedelic drugs
population explosion
making love, not war

Poem Details | by Katherine Stella |
Categories: character, child, childhood, children, dog, fantasy, film, children, giggle, happiness, humorous, imagination, nature, nostalgia, remember, smile, storm, uplifting, visionary, weather,

There's No Place Like Home

Once was a gal who felt so alone
Tornato came up rooted farms home
Landed on wicked  witch
Munchkins came out of ditch
Gave dog lollypops instead of bone

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: child, food, fun, humorous,

Silly Sausage

Silly Sally scoffed six succulent spicy sausages Six succulent spicy sausages silly Sally scoffed Silly Sally succumbed to sickness! 11~16~16

Poem Details | by David Sollis |
Categories: child, children, humor, humorous, nursery rhyme, parody,

Monday's Child - Parody

Monday’s child will slap your face,
Tuesday’s child is a disgrace,
Wednesday’s child stamps on your toe,
Thursday’s child just won’t go,
Friday’s child is most unforgiving,
Saturday’s child won’t work for a living,
And as for the child that’s born on a Sunday -
– they’ll tell you lies and steal your pay.

Originally posted on my blog with a supporting cartoon & story, which can be seen here:

Poem Details | by Rita A. Simmonds |
Categories: beach, child,

Funny Beach Poem For Kids

I saw you playing on the beach,
the sky so blue but out-of-reach.
You started throwing sand so high
it hit the sun right in the eye!
He pulled the clouds around his head
like fluffy pillows from a bed.
Then rain poured down from darkened sky;
You didn’t mean to make him cry.

Poem Details | by Tahira Parveen |
Categories: art, child, children, funny love, giggle, hilarious, love,

Little Bee

I've been given a fancy name for my illness
Clinically obese
It may be contagious
Never before seen in my colony
I can't work or lift a finger
Nice to see every one rally around me 
Even the queen bee is worried 
As what happened to me
Even sent the worker bees
All for one, hopefully one for all
Giving me a hand
I'm going to a special unit for unique bees.

Poem Details | by Emile Pinet |
Categories: child, funny, imagery, imagination,

A Donkey Spy

Meet Dorothy the donkey she has a weird googly eye, when she’s staring straight at you you will either laugh or cry. For you see, whenever she seems to be gazing ahead, her crazy googly eye is looking to her side instead! If you think she can't see you, you forgot her googly eye; hard to believe, but it's true, some say she's a donkey spy. With her googly eye, oh my! (Rhyme) 8/21/2015

Poem Details | by Eve Peterson |
Categories: child, daughter, funny, son,

Rubber Duckie

Rubber duckie you're the one
You're the reason I'm the one
Rubber duckie
You're the one for me