Humorous and funny Christian poems and/or funny poems about Christian. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Christian funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Christian Poems.
Poem Details | by
Sneha Rv |
Categories:
child, childhood, children, christian, christmas, funny, mom,
Reindeer wait
by the pane
I see shapes
A present!
Santa thinks
I’m asleep
Smells like mum
lent Santa
her perfume... ?
Poem Details | by
Arthur Vaso |
Categories:
animal, bible, christian, humorous,
Chirp chirp chirp
Cluck cluck cluck cluck
Drivel
Snivel
Dirty little men
One insane wee little hen
Let me introduce you
To a really big huge man
A heart sent from angels
A voice lowered from the heavens
A man whose humble heart
Can squash a 1000 little men
So when in life you see a fork in the road
Remember
You can be the Hen
Or you can be the bigger man
Poem Details | by
Caren Krutsinger |
Categories:
2nd grade, 3rd grade, 4th grade, 5th grade, christian, humorous, music,
No one knows the rubble I’ve seen.
Nobody knows but DEEEshus.
I stop washing dishes and turn around.
My four-year-old is belting this out with gusto.
These dishes?
She nods.
Where did you learn it?
In church.
Okay.
Poem Details | by
Isaiah Zerbst |
Categories:
bible, christian, funny, silly,
1. Walls of Jericho:
Giddy
City
2. Moses:
Hopper
Stopper
3. The Egyptians:
Water
Fodder
4. Jael:
Hammer
Slammer
5. Sampson:
Pillar
Killer
6. Laban:
Fuzzin'
Cousin
References:
1. Joshua 6:20
2. Exodus 10:17-19
3. Exodus 14:28
4. Judges 4:21
5. Judges 16:29-30
6. Genesis 31:41
Written July 2d and 3d, 2013
Poem Details | by
Verlena S. Walker |
Categories:
character, christian, culture, depression, emotions, feelings, funny,
sip your coffee and smoke cigar
you the *** holy and mob boss
catholic faith noth
protestants’ hybrid
St. John the Baptist spurious
Poem Details | by
Sam Ruby |
Categories:
adventure, angel, angst, art, beautiful, black african american, business, butterfly, caregiving, christian, confusion, courage, dedication, devotion, dream, faith, family, fear, freedom, funny, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, history, hope, inspirational, life, lonely, love, philosophy, spiritual, visionary, world, love, money,
If its money I got its money ill keep.
If its money I have its money ill weep.
If its love that I give its love ill receive.
For I am but no one who just see's beneath.
Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.
Poem Details | by
Brenda Mcgrath |
Categories:
christian, dad, father, humorous, religious,
She was a Preacher’s daughter and a little Georgia peach,
With a slow southern drawl in her unassuming speech.
Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a shape that caught the eye,
Which made her God-fearing father just want to sigh…
He preached in his sermons to turn the other cheek,
But she had to conquer an unrelenting stubborn streak.
“Stay on the straight and narrow,” her Dad warned her with a frown.
“God is watching up there… you don’t want to let Him down.”
Poem Details | by
Roland Fleming |
Categories:
christian, faith, funny, god, happy, humorous, life, song, song-uplifting, work,
Quit my job, smashed my car
My back does throb, need to learn guitar
So I can make, a silly song
And I can sing, it all day long
About how, my God is strong
So that even now, nothing’s wrong
Even though, I quit my job
smashed my car, my back does throb
Life is hard, but I’ve got God
So I won’t let any thought
Any worry or fear
Convince me you’re not near
Even when, I quit my job,
Smashed my car, my back does throb
Life is hard, but I won’t sob
I need to learn guitar
Poem Details | by
Deborah Turner |
Categories:
christian, funny, giggle, inspiration, inspirational, jesus, joy,
Look, to your left a pot of gold, this is not real.
Well, look to your right a pot of silver, this is not real also.
Then, look down money all around, this is not real.
On the other hand, Look! Look! Up at the sky Christ lives, now this is what is really real.
God Bless
Poem Details | by
John Beam |
Categories:
allusion, christian, first love, funny, satire, valentines day,
The day for the love if this was every day not love for the day
Poem Details | by
Robert Amure |
Categories:
christian, encouraging, funny, tribute,
Prayer For Bad Noose
(The Goitre Psalm)
The Lord is my Shepherd
I shall not want a Swollen Neck
He Leads me to the BEST Physician
He Restores my Throat
He Leads me through the dangers of Surgery
for His Name’s Sake
Yeah, thou I work through the Shallowest of Breath,
I fear it’s just “Goitre Go!!”…Thyroid -
and Thy Staff comfort me.
Thou Prepared an Operating Table for me……
You anointed my body with Anaesthesia …my Calm Runs over.
Surely with Your Goodness and Mercy shall I swallow…
….all the Days of my Life.
(The Fg 81.5.8)
Poem Details | by
Chukwuemeka Mbah |
Categories:
allah, allegory, angel, baptism, boyfriend, business, christian, devotion, funny, jesus, spiritual,
On earth on a Mission
purpose redefined with singleness of vision
clarity came cause i sat to look
through the pages of the book
Some days skipped with nothing to dine
some nights slept with nothing to wine
yet more nourished than a royal cook
for i am best fed from the pages of the book
When I lost focus and fell
drowning in the depths of the well
yet I was lifted by an unseen hook
as i flipped through the pages of the book
What about you my dear friend
when the terrestrial race comes to an end
and death vomits all that it ever took
will your name be found on the pages of the book
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
christian, giggle, religious, sexy,
~ Revised Repost ~
There once was a minister so meek
His sole desire, the Lord for to seek
Despite babes everywhere
Never once did he stare
He just smiled, then turned her other cheek
Poem Details | by
Clive Blake |
Categories:
bible, christian, christmas, fun, hilarious, humor, humorous,
Heading into Bethlehem ...
Three Wise Men,
In search of a stable.
Heading out of Bethlehem ...
Three Wise Turkeys,
While they were - still able.
Poem Details | by
Rico Leffanta |
Categories:
christian, funny, political,
Saint Peter at the Golden Gate
Is a man that Trump loves to hate
After The Fall
God needs a Wall
So build one before its too late!
Poem Details | by
Just That Archaic Poet |
Categories:
christian, death, god, humorous, jesus, religion, satire,
I twice am Christ, self-loved and prized;
Above the Earth, to lift -Arise!
The Devil's deeds seem sweet indeed
(By them, truly, am quite enticed!)
A magic Martyr- now crucified,
To my own great feigned dismay
A Crown of Horns; the King of Lies!
(The Romans make such grand displays...)
If but one of you would thus believe,
Repeat the Gospel, and for me grieve
A lesson to learn should I not return:
There can be nothing that's good about being
misunderstood-
You could be nailed the same as me!
Poem Details | by
Jacqueline R. Mendoza |
Categories:
christian, feelings, happiness, happy, how i feel, humor, life, mother, nature, self, spiritual, world,
Jacqueline R.
Simple but Elegant
Daughter of my mother
Lover of Nature, colors Green and White
Who feels sad that the world is overpowered with darkness
Depressed that people are fighting
Happy that I'm different
Who would like to see all people in one faith, loving each other and have patience over all things
Reside in Daly City, California
Mendoza
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
beautiful, beauty, celebrity, christian, humorous, woman, women,
Just one is the most beautiful in the lists
both of Lindas and of the evangelists.
Volodymyr Knyr
2015
Poem Details | by
Carolina Na-Ibo Gandah |
Categories:
christian, society,
Man; He is very powerful yet powerless
He trusts in his abilities yet he has nothing
He says tomorrow I will, yet tomorrow he isn’t
Oh Man, have you not yet learnt that there is nothing that you have that is yours???
Poem Details | by
Yasemin Balandi |
Categories:
adventure, analogy, child, christian, christmas, humor, love,
Christmas
Her words flow effusive
Like lava, molten. Melting rocks
Mellow is the background music
She is tired of boondoggle. Cacophony
Of the Guests. Bright are the Christmas lights.
When had the Christmases became for the bourgeois
Champagne is what Christ would disapprove of.
She is sure. Quid pro Quo?
Christ was a socialist
No longer can she feign Elan for these capitalist festivities
ALAS the Turkey is well cooked
Tinsels and presents make her children ecstatic
More mulled wine, anyone?
Poem Details | by
Jerry Wells |
Categories:
best friend, christian, funny, giving, happy, hello, sleep,
POEM 23 BIG PAPA WORLD
BIG PAPA WORLD HAS HAPPINESS
LOVE, JOY, & WISDOM THAT IS
SPREAD ALL AROUND.
BIG PAPA WORLD PEACE & HARMONY
CAN BE FOUND IN EVERY ONE LIVES IN
THEY OWN WORLD.
MR. PROFESSOR. JERRY”BIG PAPA” WELLS
AUTHOR
Poem Details | by
Alfonso II Warally Ngengethe Mussabwa Chris |
Categories:
12th grade, christian, education, humor, jesus, religious, student,
I remember when I was in school,
The weather was so cool
Our teacher of religion said," Jesus is God"
One pagan colleague objected ," He is not God."
Teacher was not happy to hear that word
Then I said loudly ," He is the Lord of lords."
All Christian students clapped their hands
Teacher was so happy and called her friends.
Jesus Christ is yesterday, today and forever
Our best teacher , strength, authority , power,
Our saviour, redeemer , Consolation,
Revelator, protection and solution.
We adore and worship Him daily
He is goodly , peacefully and kindly.
May 06/2023
Written for poetry contest
sponsored by Sotto poet.
Form: COUPLET
Poem Details | by
John Beam |
Categories:
absence, allusion, christian, feelings, humorous, jesus, life,
a tasteless stone soup everyone puts in a stone offering nothing
Poem Details | by
Anil Deo |
Categories:
america, betrayal, christian, community, discrimination, faith, funny love,
When the erstwhile Tweeter-in-Chief vents
It is "Freedom of Speech," a First Amendment Right
When Democratic Party will "fight" tyrant-efforts
Defense rests on moral equivalence, yet last night
As many as seven Republican Senators got Party censures
For voting to convict Christian Trump of incitement (01/06/2021)
(c) Deo sheltering in place while US democracy blows over this planet.
Poem Details | by
John Beam |
Categories:
allegory, animal, christian, freedom, funny, humor, humorous, satire,
rocking the boat - Hey Hey what are you doing There is a snake