Funny Poems About Christian or Christian Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Christian poems and/or funny poems about Christian. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Christian funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Christian Poems.

Poem Details | by Sneha RV |
Categories: child, childhood, children, christian, christmas, funny, mom,

Keeping mum


Reindeer wait
   by the pane
I see shapes


A present!
   Santa thinks
I’m asleep 


Smells like mum 
   lent Santa 
her perfume...  ?

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: animal, bible, christian, humorous,

Little Men and the Hen

Chirp chirp chirp
Cluck cluck cluck cluck
Drivel
Snivel
Dirty little men
One insane wee little hen

Let me introduce you
To a really big huge man
A heart sent from angels
A voice lowered from the heavens
A man whose humble heart 
Can squash a 1000 little men

So when in life you see a fork in the road
Remember
You can be the Hen
Or you can be the bigger man


Poem Details | by Caren Krutsinger |
Categories: 2nd grade, 3rd grade, 4th grade, 5th grade, christian, humorous, music,

Nobody Knows the Rubble I Have Seen

No one knows the rubble I’ve seen.
Nobody knows but DEEEshus.
I stop washing dishes and turn around.
My four-year-old is belting this out with gusto.

These dishes?
She nods.
Where did you learn it?
In church.

Okay.

Poem Details | by Isaiah Zerbst |
Categories: bible, christian, funny, silly,

Ancient Footles

1. Walls of Jericho:
Giddy
City
 

2. Moses:
Hopper
Stopper


3. The Egyptians:
Water
Fodder


4. Jael:
Hammer 
Slammer


5. Sampson:
Pillar
Killer


6. Laban:
Fuzzin'
Cousin


References: 
1. Joshua 6:20
2. Exodus 10:17-19
3. Exodus 14:28
4. Judges 4:21
5. Judges 16:29-30
6. Genesis 31:41

Written July 2d and 3d, 2013



Poem Details | by Verlena S. Walker |
Categories: character, christian, culture, depression, emotions, feelings, funny,

laugh out loud brawy limerick

sip your coffee and smoke cigar
you the *** holy and mob boss 
catholic faith noth
protestants’ hybrid
St. John the Baptist spurious


Poem Details | by Sam Ruby |
Categories: adventure, angel, angst, art, beautiful, black african american, business, butterfly, caregiving, christian, confusion, courage, dedication, devotion, dream, faith, family, fear, freedom, funny, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, history, hope, inspirational, life, lonely, love, philosophy, spiritual, visionary, world, love, money,

I

If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.

Poem Details | by Brenda McGrath |
Categories: christian, dad, father, humorous, religious,

Little Georgia Peach

She was a Preacher’s daughter and a little Georgia peach,
With a slow southern drawl in her unassuming speech.
Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a shape that caught the eye,
Which made her God-fearing father just want to sigh…

He preached in his sermons to turn the other cheek,
But she had to conquer an unrelenting stubborn streak.
“Stay on the straight and narrow,” her Dad warned her with a frown.
“God is watching up there… you don’t want to let Him down.”


Poem Details | by Roland Fleming |
Categories: christian, faith, funny, god, happy, humorous, life, song, song-uplifting, work,

Quit My Job, Smashed My Car

Quit my job, smashed my car
My back does throb, need to learn guitar

So I can make, a silly song
And I can sing, it all day long
About how, my God is strong
So that even now, nothing’s wrong

Even though, I quit my job
smashed my car, my back does throb

Life is hard, but I’ve got God
So I won’t let any thought
Any worry or fear
Convince me you’re not near

Even when, I quit my job,
Smashed my car, my back does throb
Life is hard, but I won’t sob
I need to learn guitar

Poem Details | by Deborah Turner |
Categories: christian, funny, giggle, inspiration, inspirational, jesus, joy,

What is real

Look, to your left a pot of gold, this is not real.

Well, look to your right a pot of silver, this is not real also.

Then, look down money all around, this is not real.

 On the other hand, Look! Look! Up at the  sky Christ lives, now this is what is really real.

God Bless

Poem Details | by John Beam |
Categories: allusion, christian, first love, funny, satire, valentines day,

Sugar Coated

The day for the love                                                                                                                                                                if this was every day                                                                                                                                                              not love for the day

Poem Details | by Robert Amure |
Categories: christian, encouraging, funny, tribute,

A Prayer for Bad Noose

Prayer For Bad Noose
(The Goitre Psalm) 

The Lord is my Shepherd
I shall not want a Swollen Neck
He Leads me to the BEST Physician
He Restores my Throat
He Leads me through the dangers of Surgery
		for His Name’s Sake
Yeah, thou I work through the Shallowest of Breath, 
I fear it’s just “Goitre Go!!”…Thyroid - 
and Thy Staff comfort me.
Thou Prepared an Operating Table for me……
You anointed my body with Anaesthesia …my Calm Runs over.
Surely with Your Goodness and Mercy shall I swallow…
….all the Days of my Life.

		(The Fg 81.5.8)

Poem Details | by Chukwuemeka Mbah |
Categories: allah, allegory, angel, baptism, boyfriend, business, christian, devotion, funny, jesus, spiritual,

Pages of the Book

On earth on a Mission
purpose redefined with singleness of vision
clarity came cause i sat to look
through the pages of the book


Some days skipped with nothing to dine
some nights slept with nothing to wine
yet more nourished than a royal cook
for i am best fed from the pages of the book


When I lost focus and fell
drowning in the depths of the well
yet I was lifted by an unseen hook
as i flipped through the pages of the book


What about you my dear friend
when the terrestrial race comes to an end
and death vomits all that it ever took
will your name be found on the pages of the book

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: christian, funny, political,

Trump Versus Heaven

Saint Peter at the Golden Gate
Is a man that Trump loves to hate
After The Fall
God needs a Wall
So build one before its too late!

Poem Details | by Just That Archaic Poet |
Categories: christian, death, god, humorous, jesus, religion, satire,

Twice the Christ

I twice am Christ, self-loved and prized; 
Above the Earth, to lift -Arise! 
The Devil's deeds seem sweet indeed 
(By them, truly, am quite enticed!) 
A magic Martyr- now crucified, 
To my own great feigned dismay
A Crown of Horns; the King of Lies! 
(The Romans make such grand displays...) 
If but one of you would thus believe, 
Repeat the Gospel, and for me grieve
A lesson to learn should I not return:
There can be nothing that's good about being 
misunderstood-
You could be nailed the same as me!


Poem Details | by Jacqueline R. Mendoza |
Categories: christian, feelings, happiness, happy, how i feel, humor, life, mother, nature, self, spiritual, world,

Me

Jacqueline R.
Simple but Elegant
Daughter of my mother
Lover of Nature, colors Green and White
Who feels sad that the world is overpowered with darkness
Depressed that people are fighting
Happy that I'm different
Who would like to see all people in one faith, loving each other and have patience over all things
Reside in Daly City, California
Mendoza

Poem Details | by Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories: beautiful, beauty, celebrity, christian, humorous, woman, women,

Linda Evangelista

Just one is the most beautiful in the lists
both of Lindas and of the evangelists.

Volodymyr Knyr
2015


Poem Details | by Carolina Na-ibo Gandah |
Categories: christian, society,

Funny World

Man; He is very powerful yet powerless 
He trusts in his abilities yet he has nothing 
He says tomorrow I will, yet tomorrow he isn’t 

Oh Man, have you not yet learnt that there is nothing that you have that is yours???

Poem Details | by YASEMIN BALANDI |
Categories: adventure, analogy, child, christian, christmas, humor, love,

CHRISTMAS

Christmas

Her words flow effusive
Like lava, molten.  Melting rocks
Mellow is the background music
She is tired of boondoggle. Cacophony
Of the Guests.  Bright are the Christmas lights.
When had the Christmases became for the  bourgeois
Champagne is what Christ would disapprove of.
She is sure.  Quid pro Quo? 
Christ was a socialist
No longer can she feign Elan for these capitalist festivities
ALAS the Turkey is well cooked
Tinsels and presents make her children ecstatic
More mulled wine, anyone?

Poem Details | by Jerry Wells |
Categories: best friend, christian, funny, giving, happy, hello, sleep,

B8-POEM 23 BIG PAPA WORLD

POEM 23 BIG PAPA WORLD 


BIG PAPA WORLD HAS HAPPINESS

LOVE, JOY, & WISDOM THAT IS 

SPREAD ALL AROUND.



BIG PAPA WORLD PEACE & HARMONY 

CAN BE FOUND IN EVERY ONE LIVES IN 

THEY OWN WORLD. 







MR. PROFESSOR. JERRY”BIG PAPA” WELLS 

AUTHOR 





Poem Details | by John Beam |
Categories: absence, allusion, christian, feelings, humorous, jesus, life,

A nihilism

a tasteless stone soup                                                                                                                                                                             everyone puts in a stone                                                                                                                                                                offering nothing

Poem Details | by Clive Blake |
Categories: bible, christian, christmas, fun, hilarious, humor, humorous,

Wisdom In Triplicate

Heading into Bethlehem ...
Three Wise Men, 
In search of a stable.

Heading out of Bethlehem ...
Three Wise Turkeys,
While they were - still able.

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: christian, giggle, religious, sexy,

Never Once Did He Stare

         ~ Revised Repost ~ 


  There once was a minister so meek
  His sole desire, the Lord for to seek
    Despite babes everywhere
    Never once did he stare
  He just smiled, then turned her other cheek

Poem Details | by John Beam |
Categories: allegory, animal, christian, freedom, funny, humor, humorous, satire,

Just as if I'd

rocking the boat                                                                                                -    Hey Hey what are you doing                                                                                            There is a snake

Poem Details | by Joe Sandler |
Categories: anxiety, celebration, christian, christmas, december, humorous, snow,

Santa's Covid Crisis

Oh god.Bad news from the North Pole.
The pandemic has taken it's toll.
Santa is in quarantine.
Tested positive for Covid19.
Do not worry for there's somebody
Who's tested positive for Covid antibodies.
Had the disease and now is immune.
Santa's duties she will assume.
She's the one who'll save the day.
Misses Claus will drive the sleigh.
She'll dress up just like her hubby.
She just won't be quite as chubby!

Poem Details | by Anil Deo |
Categories: america, betrayal, christian, community, discrimination, faith, funny love,

Beware America's Democracy

When the erstwhile Tweeter-in-Chief vents
It is "Freedom of Speech," a First Amendment Right
When Democratic Party will "fight" tyrant-efforts
Defense rests on moral equivalence, yet last night
As many as seven Republican Senators got Party censures
For voting to convict Christian Trump of incitement (01/06/2021)

(c) Deo sheltering in place while US democracy blows over this planet.