Humorous and funny Conflict poems and/or funny poems about Conflict. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Conflict funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Conflict Poems.
conflict, food, humorous, wedding,
My baker’s commissioned to bake
A huge cow shaped iced wedding cake
The groom is a farmer
He sure is a charmer
Its design could lead to heartbreak
When the bride saw the cake how she cried
Her traditional cake was denied
She screamed at the groom
Get out of this room
Then she plunged the knife in the cow’s side
Inspired by but not for contest
Mary Oliver Rotman
betrayal, conflict, funny, heartbreak, hurt, lost love, metaphor,
You should know that I've
reinforced the bunker
I built around my heart
until it can withstand a
from a YOU-bomb.
I've shielded it to withstand
the worst EMP (emotional mutilation potential)
you can generate
and to protect me from
the flash burns of passion,
Not to mention that I've lined it with lead
to save me from the fallout
of your so-called love.
hit me with your worst.
My bunker--and I-- are ready.
Jerry T Curtis
abuse, bullying, conflict, humorous,
If you want to bully me, you'd better stand in line
And I'll warn you right up front, it's gonna to take some time
It's really not my fault, cause it's nothing that I do
The way that I attract every loser just like you
conflict, humorous, relationship,
Sue decided to send Jim a tweet
She used words that were quite indiscreet
Calling him a fat turd -
(Using another word)
Their romance has taken a back seat!
conflict, french, history, humorous, mystery, poetry, world,
Waterloo Clerihew 23-Skidoo
1769 Corsica is where he got his start
One of the greatest commanders in history
His manner of death a 200-year-old mystery
Napoleon played it close to the vest
With his armies he was always the best
But 'twas nothing he could do
When he met his Waterloo
Lived his last few years under house arrest
Napoleon drank the water and headed for the loo
He did nothing different than you or I could ever do
Be kind to your skin and protect your bone-a-parts
Remember that's where good hygiene starts!
conflict, confusion, evil, hilarious, society, trust, truth,
Some people lie for no reason at all
While many lie with a great reasoning
Most lie to safeguard and be saved from fall
Others let themselves be blamed for speaking.
Few lie for a good acceptable cause
And many just construct a cause to lie
Its not always the flip side of truth's pause
Sometimes a lie stands on its own clean tie.
For lying is a complex social act
More than a habit but a human trait
To be a well functional artefact
Protecting expectations truth can't wait.
Lies cover up another truth to suit
Or made to create a new set of truth.
Chantelle Anne Cooke
animal, cat, conflict, humor,
Ah, to write
With hyper cats in sight
Who jump upon the computer in delight
I’m surprised some of my poems or comments aren’t
Quickly I race to print poetry grace in paw wrestling fights
Oh, wondrous sleeping cats, where I pen after midnight
Posted with promised success, my souls rises like a kite
Alas, everything is alright!
December 23rd 2018
My finger hovers over that little red button… should I press it?
anxiety, conflict, humor,
Lost in the valley of indecision
Forever caught between here and there
My mind is divided, my soul is torn
And monstrous phantoms are everywhere
There's neither light, nor is there darkness
Here in this barren oasis of grey
Trapped somewhere in between questions and answers
Groping and grasping to find my way
I'll lose my mind if I go on performing
This balancing act between madness and death
A stand is needed for yea or for nay
Or else very soon I may draw my last breath
Deciding that I cannot make a decision
Embracing the madness instead of this yoke
The phantoms encroaching, I suddenly jumped up
And out of this horrible nightmare I woke
© Mike Wise
brother, conflict, humorous, sister,
Daddy look at this place
Mommy said it’s a disgrace
cos nothing’s in the right place
the floor’s an obstacle race
and my best book on space
isn’t in the book case
BUT my kid sister Grace
is lurking on the staircase
she’s got a grin on her face -
That smile I’d like to erase!
Daddy I can only assume
she’s been in my bedroom
As she can now reach the door
Daddy I’ve warned her before
One day there’s gonna be war!
Daddy just hear my plea
Please please give me a key
Then I can lock my sister out
And then mommy won’t shout…
Look At This Place! Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Matt Caliri
L MILTON HANKINS
conflict, confusion, humorous, metaphor,
unhinging, disorienting, confusing
puzzle, somersault; details, viscera
twisting, wearing, turning
front to back, socks
written October 10, 2021
conflict, confusion, funny,
( Retrieved from an advertisement
"Cleaners for Christmas" )
Cleaner can not perform inside cleaning - due security reasons
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
age, change, character, conflict, hilarious, identity, imagery,
The mobile phone
away peace . . .
conflict, funny, military, silly, war,
Hopping mad, Billy glares through a port
at what foes seem to think is such sport.
Frown for frown, glare for glare,
scarecrow raises his hair.
He laughed yet while his foes took the fort!
"The human race has but one affective weapon,
and that is laughter."
anger, conflict, humorous, sick, wisdom,
Idiot, imbecile, moron, bastardo
Falling, vomitting, succombing
change, computer, conflict, humorous,
Why don’t you behave
You’re my latest browser
And I’d like you to stay
But some of these add ons
They make you crash
But I must admit
You’re the best so far
I’ve tried a few
And you’re a star
You don’t like Java
I think, I can tell
It’s red in my plug ins
Why do you rebel
So before I ditch you
I’ll give you a chance
If you crash again
It will be your last
Let’s get on together
You do the browsing
And I’ll check the weather
© Copyright KC.Leake
1st April 2015
All Rights Reserved
Mark J. Halliday
conflict, life, love, marriage,
Nobody's spouse is perfect.
Marriage always has conflicts.
You need a sense of humor
To remain in love.
child, christmas, conflict, father daughter, humorous, parody,
Pa threw all my new toys away
Now my friends won’t want to come and play
Cos I was naughty yesterday
All the gifts disappeared from ‘neath the tree
Now the carpet’s bare for all to see
Pa snapped at me so suddenly
Why I had to drown our old cat
I cannot say
She fell in the loo so I flushed
the cat awayyyyyyyyyyy
Pa threw all my new toys away
Santa delivered them on his red sleigh
But when Pa is mad, there’s no leeway
Purely Fictional write inspired by hearing Yesterday on the radio
conflict, funny, gender, identity, psychological,
He said he was a "woman",
Just trapped in a wrong body.
When time came he had to pee-
Used the room.... for "Men".
All rights reserved~~Cynthia Buhain-Baello~~05.28.15
The Dodoitsu is a fixed folk song form of Japanese origin
and is often about LOVE or HUMOR. It has 26 syllables,
four lines of 7, 7, 7, 5 syllables respectively.
It is unrhymed and non-metrical.
addiction, anniversary, anxiety, art, baby, beautiful, beauty, blessing, boyfriend, class, confidence, conflict, desire, destiny, devotion, education, environment, faith, fantasy, fate, feelings, for her, fun, funny love, future, giggle, girlfriend, happiness, heart, heaven, life, light, loneliness, lonely, lost, lust, magic, strength, stress, sweet love, symbolism,
Often, I have uttered these words to myself
Your feminity has entranced my manhood
My vision is focused on your subject matter
A quick study of a woman's psychology
I feel you with my mind, and touch you with my eyes
Senses are heightened in your very presence
Soon, I will utter the ultimate words of encouragement
Constant admiration for your hidden strengths
Instant chemistry between us has changed our biology
Soon, I will hold you tight and recite the following;
Baby, I love you
character, conflict, fear, horror, humor, life,
There once was a knight from Rocket town
Who lured and let his amour men down
But on a night not too young
Nemesis caught up with Doung
When his archers incursed Little town.
betrayal, bible, character, conflict, easter, faith, farewell, giggle, history, paradise, people, power, psychological, religious, sorry, storm, travel, tribute, trust, women,
Taking sides in discussions holily
About whether Uran used his willy
Means you're trapped in their game -
Either side is the same:
**** distracts, cash departs, crowd stays silly.
The National Poet Of Slovenia In A Language People Understand interprets important Slovenian affairs for the non-Slovene speaking world.
Jerry T Curtis
conflict, humor, jealousy, nonsense, silly, work, writing,
Steal This Poem Please
Please just steal this poem
and make this one your own
in plagiarizing poetry
you know you're not alone
If you think it's worth that much
you know what you should do
don't worry about the copyright
just say it's penned by you
Please just steal this poem
and publish it to boot
spread it round the nations
I don't give a hoot
Spend your time and trouble
making money with my work
So one day I can sue you
for all that you'll be worth
by JT Curtis (maybe ? )
Nabbed by a cop
Tried to stop crime
Said “drop the loot”
Crook went to jail
Made his bail quick
More detail at six
Turned a new leaf
Tired of grief now
A thief no more
anxiety, appreciation, conflict, courage, culture, dedication, funny,
The teen’s face beamed with pride in his new car,
But Bestie exploded in jealous rage.
His reluctant congrats, a lame sidebar;
“I’d simply rather walk”— framed his outrage.
On Friday she failed the entrance exam,
Going to college, now holds no desire,
Higher education—a real flimflam,
she declared, all she’d felt now a fool’s pyre.
Excuses shirk blame—we can all decry,
Winning is fun, but losing kills yearning;
Life isn’t perfect—things do go awry,
But disparagement isn't good learning!
Be strong and just—suck it up when you lose.
Raisins are just sour grapes—with a bruise.
August 19, 2018