Humorous and funny Dark poems and/or funny poems about Dark. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Dark funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Dark Poems.
Poem Details | by
Arthur Vaso |
Categories:
art, dark, evil, funny, humorous, internet,
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get dressed
is not that kind of poem
vote
please favorite me
I am flavor to be
like me
love me
photoshop me
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add ads, subtract ads
multiply wine ads
get more wine
is a long damn add
ok
bought the Mercedes
make love
to words
iPassion
is in
snap snap and chat
latex friendships
hollywood dreams
with amex
I never leave home
there she rests
in the trunk
blood mixed
with that new car smell
everything is modern these days
even my jail cell
Poem Details | by
Michelle Faulkner |
Categories:
dark, humor, people,
You are what you eat; it is true,
So cannibals are people too!
5/06/22
Killing with an Epigram contest
Sponsor: Margarita Lillico
Poem Details | by
Mark Peterson |
Categories:
dark, horror, humorous,
Parted curtains
puff of smoke.
Parlor trick
or cruel joke?
First a bat,
then human form—
eyes aglow,
fangs enorm.
And in the mirror,
no image there;
it stilled my heart
and stifled prayer.
But Drac was old
and suffered so;
his timing off,
reactions slow.
As he lunged
I stepped aside;
mallet ready,
his chest I eyed.
He lay there stunned,
at last my break;
I then asked how
he’d like his stake.
2nd Place, Poems from the Vampire, Just That Archaic Poet
Poem Details | by
A.O. Taner |
Categories:
beautiful, beauty, courage, cute love, dark, deep, depression, desire, destiny, devotion, dream, first love, funny love, grief, happiness, heart, heartbreak, heartbroken, how i feel, i am, i love you, i miss you, innocence, irony, jealousy, lonely, longing, loss, lost, love, love hurts, miss you, missing, missing you, night, passion, psychological, romance, romantic, sad, sad love, silence, sky, sleep, solitude, sunset, true love,
have you ever felt like
the flashing red light on the roof,
lonely as ever
visible at night, useless by day?
in sync with its partner next door
for a quick kiss over a few flashes only
then arguing again and again
night in, night out.
have you ever felt like
the flashing red light on the roof,
not signaling a warning to keep away
but sending a call for compassion?
using the dark pauses in between
to yell the same name
over and over and over
into the emptiness of each night.
have you ever felt like
the flashing red light on the roof,
being your silent cry
only heard by your eternal love?
Poem Details | by
David Brown |
Categories:
anger, break up, dark, humor, irony,
On these bare walls
there once hung
artwork that was picked by you,
which you'd then picked over,
leaving only a needlepoint
your mother made for our wedding
and a picture an alcoholic friend gave you
of a bear
How ironic now,
it seems, they're not so bare
since I've hung a painting of
dancing bears on the bare wall where
I took down the needlepoint
and a butterfly,
in the bare spot you left
by the front door
Poem Details | by
David Brown |
Categories:
anxiety, dark, depression, humor, image,
Thoughts
and
feelings
on a
downward
spiral,
now
that's
what's
truly,
going
viral
Poem Details | by
Elizabeth Wesley |
Categories:
funny, dark, dark, time,
The nose he wears sits on his head
It's big and round and very red;
And in the dark it always glows
It must be awful to own that nose.
There's two dark holes filled with hair
With whatever else that's hidden there;
Each time I see with great surprise
That glow that sits between his eyes.
It shines as though when night meets day
There never could be another way;
I wonder too if he can tell
If red affects his sense of smell.
Perhaps the problem is I think
He's had in time too much to drink;
I suggested then to paint it white
And he seemed to think this was alright.
For Frank Herrera's Zaniest Poetry Contest
Elizabeth Wesley
Poem Details | by
Frank Polgar |
Categories:
dark, humorous, satire,
welcome to the nightmare
365 days of triskaidekaphobia
where will you hide
The world didn't end in 2012, so now we have to deal with the number 13 all year long. I wrote this poem with that in mind. Of course, my tongue was firmly planted in my cheek.
Poem Details | by
Michael Wise |
Categories:
boat, humorous, ocean,
Sammy went out on a lark
sailing his boat in the dark
and while he got drunk
his little boat sunk
so his hangover went to the shark
Poem Details | by
David Kavanagh |
Categories:
allusion, dark, feelings, humor,
i see dead people
but they can never see me
~ i see through her too
COMPLETELY YOUR CHOICE (45)
any form any theme Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Brian Strand 10th place
Senryu Humorous, Satirical or Dark
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin 3rd place
Poem Details | by
Corinne Curcio |
Categories:
funny
Don't be bitter baby
You're the one I love
And I know how to sweeten you up
I swim into you
My dreamy brown
Steamy queen
Pass over my lips
Your tasty effusions on my tongue
Are intoxicating
When you go down
The warmth spreads through me
And you set my heart to racing
Too bad that's the reason why
My doctor says I have
To switch to dull, lifeless decaf
Poem Details | by
Gary Smith |
Categories:
dark, horror, humorous,
I like it when the Sun goes down,
I like it when it's dark,
I have two pointy fangs you see,
And I like to leave my mark.
Entry for
What I Like Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Maureen McGreavy
28/2/19
Poem Details | by
Evelyn Judy Buehler |
Categories:
dark, fantasy, fear, fun, funny, hilarious, nonsense,
The rimpledeeduggs klacklety splatt britly floaming,
Ere flamping drakkurz snazzle at elvitty gloaming;
Yon jamweezy wudderslimps gamwracks smotly crawling,
Hoytaling pagartrimps flotlessly wrothful in bawling!
Beete stell ere yethle flagorns craithen yere eise,
Ort smoothle yourn mithredoons bakk toon codry skize;
Bodryluntz quidups moost stupuddle cudgely pierdax,
And zakkertic flibboots wraithling in yert tardly tracks!
Poem Details | by
Maurice Rigoler |
Categories:
dark, humor,
On Judgment Day, the throne in view,
religionists gather of every hue.
Waiting nervously for their day in court,
the Lord’s proceedings proved quite short.
Spoke the Lord: Because I am omniscient
my knowledge of one and all is sufficient.
Nor should each fear a reward infernal,
though be assured it will be just and eternal.
And so, give ear now to my wise decision –
and, please, no scoffing or derision:
As to who among you taught my true light,
that I leave to each one to decide who was right.
At this the crowds grew restless and angry,
accusations turned violent then bloody.
Thus the Lord showed no bias and no favor,
leaving the outcome to centuries-old behavior.
Poem Details | by
Dan Keir |
Categories:
adventure, angst, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, education, faith, farewell, funny, humorous, imagination, introspection, lonely, loss, lost, memory, pain, parody, passion, people, places, retirement, sad, science fiction, sorrow, sorry, space, star, teacher, time, travel, tribute, visionary,
Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.
Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.
Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.
Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.
My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.
Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.
Poem Details | by
Anthony Scandrick Ii |
Categories:
anniversary, baby, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, child, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, freedom, goodbye, graduation, growing up, happiness, hope, humorous, lonely, lost love, love, mystery, passion, satire, slam, sorrow, sorry, success, suicide, teen, thank you, uplifting, write,
You almost had me,
I wanted you,
The way you stuck to me like super glue,
I was feeling you,
But I knew,
I could never have you,
But, the way you looked at me,
The way my body pleads,
We can never be,
Because I’m too old,
And your only thirteen.
Poem Details | by
Lizzy Love |
Categories:
animal, best friend, caregiving, dark, humor, pets, relationship,
My pet monster
best friend I ever had
through all the good times
and even all the bad
we walk the streets together
some people gawk and stare
when you moan "hi" to them
it gives them quite the scare
I don't mind when you drool
and your eyes roll in your head
your still totally cool
and always welcome in my bed
and when your limbs and tail
fall off and need repair
I can stitch them on again
I will always be right there
Poem Details | by
Dan Keir |
Categories:
adventure, angst, autumn, business, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, fear, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, hate, health, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, love, on work and working, pain, parody, people, relationship, retirement, sad, satire, school, social, stress, success, sympathy, time, work,
P aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!
Poem Details | by
Anthony Scandrick Ii |
Categories:
angel, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, daughter, death, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, faith, fear, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, girlfriend, grief, happiness, hate, heaven, hope, humorous, imagination, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, passion, peace, relationship, romance, romantic, sorrow, sorry, stress, sympathy, uplifting, heart, hate, hate, heart,
When you're hurt inside,
And there's no where to hide,
And there's no one on your side,
And it's killing your pride,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,
When your heart is chocking,
The heavy words never spoken,
The things that hurt you inside,
When love has died,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,
When your heart is gone,
From being alone,
And it beats a solemn tone,
When you're cold inside,
It's only a short ride,
Never take hate outside
Poem Details | by
Paul Callus |
Categories:
dark, humor,
He made her life a living hell.
Her heart immune to the death knell
She breaks down and cries
Tears spring from her eyes
Her acting days now serve her well.
-----------------------------------------
Contest: Open Poetry
Sponsor: Charlotte Puddifoot
11th July, 2015
Placed 7th
Poem Details | by
Perry Campanella |
Categories:
beach, color, dark, fire, fun, giggle, happy, humorous, inspirational, international, july, new year, poetry, senses, voice, youth,
E-Z Glo Punk, Lightning Flash,
TNT Devices will burst, do crash
Southern Night, Piccolo Petes
are hard to beat...
I like hand held Sparklers, Tanks
flashing fountains, Solar Flare
Six to #20 Gold I have to share,
no incidence, no burns, thanks...
Whistles blow, fountains glow,
pop'n sounds, entire sky all aglow
I love those colors, high an low
trails eched onto my retina
inspired me to let ya know
Now you close both eyes
in pitch dark, what a surprise
for you to see, right there
darkness, absolutely anywhere
beautiful trails of lights in motion
"Always read a label of caution"
Poem Details | by
T Wignesan |
Categories:
crazy, humor,
Limerick : Once a Dark Horse in a handicap
Once a Dark Horse in a handicap
Led head, tail and hoof in the last lap
All eyes on winning post
Cameras clicked the most
Horse lost in the negative, so clap !
© T. Wignesan – Paris, 2013
Poem Details | by
Sam Ruby |
Categories:
angst, art, beautiful, beauty, boyfriend, butterfly, caregiving, childhood, computer-internet, confusion, courage, cowboy-western, dance, dark, daughter, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, funny, girl, girlfriend, goodbye, growing up, happiness, humorous, inspirational, lost, lost love, nostalgia, peace, romance, romantic, sad, song, teen, time, uplifting, women, me, love, me,
Your love pricks me like a rose each thorn grows but no one knows Your so full of
it as it shows so carry on now go on, go. I'm fed up with the phony and i'm
through with the tears, you couldn't pay me all your money to make up for those
years. Someone help me I feel faint how could I think he was such a saint and
worst of all I let me fall into a spiral down below. A magic called love carried
by the dove of someone I use to know.
Poem Details | by
Michelle Born |
Categories:
art, beautiful, beauty, dark, fantasy, gothic, humor,
I have always been drawn to Gothic art
It doesn't mean that I play the part,
The art to me is dark and has fantasy all in one
Like Anime art that is really fun,
I guess we all have that dark side that is not revealed
But, trust me my love for Gothic art is for real,
It's a cool world all on it's own
And that fact that I did a page where my love for goth art is being shown.
Written By: Unique Poetry 2015
Poem Details | by
Charles Pullen |
Categories:
dark, emotions, humor, nonsense, people, silly, words,
Bright,
tight strings,
colorful
unraveling
nerves.