Funny Poems About December or December Funny Poems

Humorous and funny December poems and/or funny poems about December. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious December funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other December Poems.

Poem Details | by Key V. |
Categories: autumn, december, february, funny, summer, weather, winter,

Weather

I hate the cold weather, whether to say the least,
the cold weather hates me, i slipped and fell last week,
plus the warm weather's better, i'd rather sweat than freeze,
put the ice in my drinks not in my socks and sleeves, 
the reason i feel this way, stems from two things, 
maybe i'm a fall guy, with wants to see some leaves, 
or i just miss the summer days with vitamin ray beams, 
either reason or way my thoughts remain oblique,
because i hate the cold weather and cold weather hates me.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: business, funny, holiday, philosophy, time,

December 21, 2012

The world as we know it will end!
This warning the Mayans did send
But yes there's still time
After reading this rhyme
To honor Black Friday and spend


Poem Details | by Anne-Lise Andresen |
Categories: children, funny, nature, seasons,

- First Day In December -

I woke up this morning to a white glow
                        Outside it has dropped a white blanket of snow
                             I want to make a snowman named Joe
                   He shall have a red hat on, he becomes easy to know
                                It's cold and it's starting to blow
                           I rush into my house, it's cold on my toe






01.12.2012
A-L  Andresen :)

Poem Details | by Richard Lamoureux |
Categories: humorous,

June Or December

He carried June right to his bed
With promise that they would be wed 
But her sweet honey pot
Was much hotter than hot
He came out missing his "head"

He looked straight down at his member
It's head burnt off by her ember
She was so hot and bold
He much preferred the cold
It might grow back in December!


A Lamleen production

Created with my friend Eileen Manassian.

Poem Details | by Brenda Atry |
Categories: funny, introspection, life, december,

Oh Wolverine

December 12.2012


The scales are balanced, great joys ,vast heartache, deep rooted love.

Age withered appetite ,no food, nor travel desired, memories rekindle want ,but not drive.

A weekend with Hugh Jackman can surely re whet my palate, oh wolverine on high!

Brenda Atry December , 2012


Poem Details | by Tonytocaa Camacho |
Categories: december, dream, humor, silly,

Dreams and Things

Staring up at the ceiling floor

As the big hand on the clock

Races past one

Hearing the mouse rouse out of his
 
Long sleep

To gather tidbits and play

While the pussycat full belly and all

Lounges blissfully counting mice

Feeling a drop of sweat on my brow

As the fan turns upside down

Not day dreaming at night silly

Just dreaming today

A sunny Beautiful day

In...December

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: funny, holiday,

December - Cwistmas Dinner At the Fudds

Hewwo and Mewwy Cwistmas dearwest Bugsy!
Season's gweetings to you Daffy D!
So gwad you fwew out this way
Bwess my bones, if it ain't Wosemite Sam!
(Pweeze weave your shotgun in the guest womb)
Good gwacious, it's my owed fwiend Porky!
Petunia! You wook absowootly wavishing
Come in and rewax; take a woad off your...

Anyway, the hog is woasting on the wotisser...
I mean the boid is bwowning in the ov...
Wabbit stew is simmerwing on the sto...
Uh, Bugs, Dere's cwunchy cawwots in the pantwee
Daffy, I beweave there's fwesh fwog in the fwidge
Porky, I frew out some weft-overs wast week
Wet me wun out back and check...
And Sammy, twy not to shoot out the wights...

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: car, december, destiny, drink, giggle, humor, silly,

the first rudolph

once an old cabbie named fred

had a nose that glowed bright red

when a call from a bar

put an elf in his car

and now he leads santas sled.

Poem Details | by Girisha Suneja |
Categories: best friend, december, funny, future, girl, green, student,

Dont Tell

don’t ask! don’t tell!
Daddies in the well.
Its ok you wont go to hell,
don’t ask ,don’t tell !
Never kiss and tell,
don’t tell lies ,go into your shell,
I asked ,I told ,
Now am in a hole.
Living like a hermit,
Washing off the scabs of shame,
Believing I’ am to blame.
don’t ask! don’t tell I’ am drowning in the well.
Sinking into the depths of hell,
Floating all alone.

Poem Details | by Minister Jenna Williams |
Categories: humor,

December 21, 2015

To Mrs. Emma

Oh the weather 
outside's not frightful
So the fire is
Not delightful

But as long as
U love Chuck so...
Pray for snow,
Pray for snow,
Pray for snow.

Poem Details | by Minister Jenna Williams |
Categories: christmas, humor,

December 22, 2015

I'm living in a wet Christmas
Just like the ones I've never known
Where the treetops drip-drop
And houses plip-plop
From all the rain that has fallen

I'm dreaming of a dry Christmas
Just like it won't b for this year
May your days b merry and bright!
And may the clouds reveal some sunlight.

Poem Details | by Howard Kerr |
Categories: christmas, color, creation, cute, december, fun, funny,

Debit Card Folly

Jingle bells my sleigh ride’s broke 
Gaudy gifts for “ice cool” folk 
Diamond pay card season blind
Misspent flurry on mankind!

Date posted : 18 th December 2020

Contest : Christmas Chastushka Rules Revised

Sponsor : Andrea Dietrich

Poem Details | by G. Jay |
Categories: christmas, funny,

From the North On December 24

Finally, it is that time of the year  
Lights, eggnog, with all the Christmas cheer                
Father was singing noels
Then hearing jingle bells 
Mother said, “It’s only the rain, dear”

Poem Details | by Alyssa Burgin |
Categories: december, humor, sky, stars, weather, winter,

Don'T Forget

Midnight skies
and wondering clouds,
makes it hard to see the stars.

But don't forget
they're always there,
even when the night seems harsh.

The coldness 
slowly creeping in,
makes you want to sleep.

But don't forget
there isn't snow,
without the lack of heat!

Poem Details | by Joe Sandler |
Categories: anxiety, celebration, christian, christmas, december, humorous, snow,

Santa's Covid Crisis

Oh god.Bad news from the North Pole.
The pandemic has taken it's toll.
Santa is in quarantine.
Tested positive for Covid19.
Do not worry for there's somebody
Who's tested positive for Covid antibodies.
Had the disease and now is immune.
Santa's duties she will assume.
She's the one who'll save the day.
Misses Claus will drive the sleigh.
She'll dress up just like her hubby.
She just won't be quite as chubby!

Poem Details | by Elton Camp |
Categories: funny, world,

If You Think the World Will End December 21st

If You Think the World Will 
End on December 21st

By Elton Camp

You have good reason for panic and fright
After all, the Mayas very well may be right

Money & jewels will be valueless on that day
So it’s sensible for you to give them all away

If you do, then you will be able to travel light
And to find a way to survive, you just might

Although your riches will be a hindrance to me
Send them along and I’ll accept them for free

Anyone out there who’s a believer true
There’s good reason that this you’ll do 

So if you hope to survive the coming mess
Please contact me for the mailing address

Since this world so soon will be no more
Make sure they arrive here the day before

Poem Details | by Jean Bush |
Categories: animal, bird, cat, december, food, funny,

Catfucious 7

Dinner's singing in a cage.

   A feast for me this Christmas Day.

                    Ouch!!  My neck!!

Poem Details | by Regina Mcintosh |
Categories: christmas, december, funny, hilarious, holiday, humor, humorous,

The Christmas Gift

She opened her gifts on Christmas morn Beneath the paper, a gift she’d scorn Lacey Panties unflawed She thought, "what a tightwad!" Panties in a wad since they’d been worn! A Funny Christmas or December Holiday Limerick Poetry Contest Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin November 27, 2022

Poem Details | by Luqman Samin |
Categories: cheer up, december, funny,

Dua-Liners-1

The oat is my hatred;
   but The Quakers are my beloved.

Two crackers that are well-known;
   the one that is eaten and the one that will be blown.

One fact that all can see;
   there is no 'C' in the mid of the sea.

Real tips about daddy are true;
   One for the baby and one for you.

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: chanukah, christmas, december, giggle,

O Chanukah, Dear

O Chanukah, dear
  my problem is clear
You arrived way, way
  too early this year

What's a fellow to do
  your candles all through
Potato latkes all eaten
  dreidels spun, weather-beaten

Still no snow on the ground
  yet to come Christmas sounds
While holiday gifts they are wrapping
  Chanukah's tucked away, napping

Alas and alack, please make up your mind
  never again to fall so far behind
12/25, Chanukah! next year, do you hear
  if you expect me to be of holiday cheer

Poem Details | by Heather Crismond |
Categories: december, endurance, funny, humor, humorous, irony, mountains,

December Rain

December in the central California mountains
Pine scented air tickles my cheek
Hinting at the peace to be found here
We incautiously wish for the sound of rain
Missing the calm lullaby of Mother Earth

Song became a roar
Our poor tent could not withstand
Ill-timed wish granting

03/27/21
Moments Of Reflections - Haibun Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Malabika Ray Choudhury

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: christmas, december, fun, humor,

Prancer Poke

Prancer gave Dasher a poke
It was so hard that he had to soak
His ribs were still sore
As he heads to the door
He pranced to the song, backstroke

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: december, humor, winter,

Scant Solace In the Solstice

She found scant solace in the solstice
    Holy Stockings! ~ Frozen feet now toeless

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: celebration, christmas, december, funny, kiss, nature, silly,

Mistletoe

mistletoe season ~
	time to pucker up and kiss
		the dung on a stick

Poem Details | by R J. Elless |
Categories: december, humor,

Sweet Lime

These little swiss cake
Are simply sublime.
I like them glazed.
And eat some at night.
They are my faves.
A pastry delight.

So, I weighed one eighty.
And lately passed two oh-five.
Though I'm mostly bloated.
By hydrogenous sweet lime.