Humorous and funny Farewell poems and/or funny poems about Farewell. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Farewell funny poems!
Written by
Richard Lamoureux
Categories:
farewell, humor, symbolism,
Subtraction Man
He used to be three dimensional
and then he became two
I know it seems far fetched
But I’m telling you it’s true
In two dimensions
he could still depict three
If people didn’t look to closely
They’d believe what they’d see
His paper thin personality
once colourful and cool
Gradually became faded
no longer able to fool
Winds of change kept blowing
Two dimensions turned into one
Without any depth there
one was destined to be none
Not a soul remembers him
He simply faded away
A whisper from yesterday
Who had nothing real to say
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
farewell, humorous, perspective, political,
oh for a second departure
Once simian stock from brambles
Orange buffoon whose ooze rambles
Orangutan clone
On narcissist’s throne
Owns ape-man’s old brain in shambles
Written by
Mark Peterson
Categories:
dark, horror, humorous,
Farewell To the Vampire
Parted curtains
puff of smoke.
Parlor trick
or cruel joke?
First a bat,
then human form—
eyes aglow,
fangs enorm.
And in the mirror,
no image there;
it stilled my heart
and stifled prayer.
But Drac was old
and suffered so;
his timing off,
reactions slow.
As he lunged
I stepped aside;
mallet ready,
his chest I eyed.
He lay there stunned,
at last my break;
I then asked how
he’d like his stake.
2nd Place, Poems from the Vampire, Just That Archaic Poet
Written by
Dan Keir
Categories:
adventure, angst, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, education, faith, farewell, funny, humorous, imagination, introspection, lonely, loss, lost, memory, pain, parody, passion, people, places, retirement, sad, science fiction, sorrow, sorry, space, star, teacher, time, travel, tribute, visionary,
Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode
Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.
Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.
Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.
Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.
My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.
Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.
Written by
Dan Keir
Categories:
adventure, angel, beautiful, business, childhood, death, education, fantasy, farewell, freedom, friendship, funeral, funny, growing up, happiness, happy, health, holiday, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, nostalgia, on writing and words, parody, passion, patriotic, peace, people, philosophy, slam, social, song, sorrow, sorry, spiritual, time, woman,
Ding Dong the Wicked Witch Is Dead
Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.
Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.
Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.
Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.
Written by
Linda Hays-Gibbs
Categories:
death, depression, eulogy, farewell, feelings, giggle, suicide,
Funny Man
Funny Man!
By Linda Hays-Gibbs
Oh funny man you touch the hardest heart
With messages to crumble and start
A snickering or flickering to spark
A laugh a full belly rumbler
A genius of illogical and logical matter
Without him the whole world is astronomically sadder
Oh let our grief someday subside
That we in heaven will find
A bench upfront to see his latest comedic job ( I pray)
The jester (Robin Williams) at heaven's court for God
Written by
Diane Lefebvre
Categories:
farewell, goodbye, humor, nonsense,
Tick Tac Mac
There was a young man we'll call Mac,
who loved to suck on a tic tac.
But one choked him today.
What a price he did pay
and he'll never, ever be back.
Written by
Julian Bohan
Categories:
betrayal, bible, character, conflict, easter, faith, farewell, giggle, history, paradise, people, power, psychological, religious, sorry, storm, travel, tribute, trust, women,
Theo-Oligarchic Happenings In Slovenia
URAN'S WILLY
Taking sides in discussions holily
About whether Uran used his willy
Means you're trapped in their game -
Either side is the same:
**** distracts, cash departs, crowd stays silly.
Story:
http://www.sloveniatimes.com/scandals-in-the-slovenian-church-to-go-on
The National Poet Of Slovenia In A Language People Understand interprets important Slovenian affairs for the non-Slovene speaking world.
www.maria.si
Written by
John Hardison
Categories:
farewell, humor, humorous, i miss you,
It's Not Funny
My Parting Gift.
It’s not Funny
Never leave Life’s bus behind.
It’s full of much that rhymes.
Count only on the adventure.
Even if the need for dentures.
Don’t count on the money honey.
From me it's not funny or coming.
Written by
John Lofquist
Categories:
farewell, funny, history, imagination, october,
The Ides of March Versus October
The Ides of March
are no different than of October
just seven months older
and perhaps, a little bit colder.
And had Caesar only stayed away
from the Curia of Pompey
that day
he might have lived, perhaps, a little bit longer.
© October 15, 2015
Written by
Jim Slaughter
Categories:
farewell, for him, humor,
Elegy For a Garden Gnome
There once was a gnome named Jerome
Who made a herb garden his home.
One day as he frolicked,
He slipped and fell on some garlic
And was instantly killed when a clove cleft his dome.
The sad news of Jerome spread as far north as Nome,
And there was weeping and wailing from gnomes 'cross the foam.
When I learned what transpired,
Re the way he expired,
It inspired me to proffer this "po'm" for Jerome:
Here lies our dear comrade Jerome
'neath his garden's herbivorous loam.
If he'd played "farmer in the dill",
He'd be up here with us still
'stead of filling a 3 x 6 hole, his new home.
Entered in Jay Narain's Humorous Poems Contest
July 5, 2023
!2th Place
Written by
Cindi Rockwell
Categories:
encouraging, farewell, funny, philosophy, religion,
My Parting Gifts
My parting words, which I'll keep quite brief
Never mock another's religious belief
Whether Christian or Muslim, Buddhist or Jew
Only people, not God, would wish harm upon you.
My second point that's of no less worth:
Cherish every living creature ever put on this earth.
Bring no harm to plants, to wildlife or to man,
Live as peacefully coexistent as you possibly can.
And finally, God witness, I share my true Creed,
Which took me a lifetime to consistently heed.
Whenever you seem to do naught but to lose,
Tis time for a binge with both liquor and shoes!!!
First place in contest: "My Parting Gifts"
Judged 9/1/2016
Written by
Annie Lander
Categories:
courage, dark, dedication, farewell, forgiveness, funny, hope, cancer,
Ball of Fire
Today is Doomsday.
Some believe today is Doomsday
Some say maybe the end of the year
However, do we really care?
How would the earth end?
In a ball of fire or
would it swallow us up into puff of dust
in a matter of an hour..
I rather am buried under pile of snow.
Eternal Preservation "what a nice way to go
However do we have option in a world?
Where lunatics have taken over asylums
where deranged souls spreading like a social cancer
Is doomsday the answer..?
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
community, farewell, funny, imagination, journey, light, voice,
The Honesty of Childhood Friends
Linda, you think that too?
I did not want to tell you, but since Jacque did.
Wait a second! You think I have road rage?
I have known them both for almost 60 years, but
they still betray me,
creeping at me with judgements, pretending to "help me"
Two childhood friends, doing a road rage intervention.
I am incredulous,
argumentative,
irritated,
ready to pack their stuff for them, and push them out the door.
I hope they will like their little 4 mile hike back to my house.
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
farewell, flying, fun, funny, giggle, humor, sky,
drop in traveler
i once knew a girl named sloot
who liked to travel by chute
dropping into a town
she would leave with a frown
due to the awful commute.
Written by
Pat Adams
Categories:
character, farewell, funny, goodbye,
Goodbye and Farewell
Frail boundaries pushed until they pop
I fall off the fence of protection
Shocked as my readers, but not surprised
With permanent loss of connection!
"Karma's a *****", the battle cry is heard
An apt notion I'm forced to suppose
Tempting fate, you'll eventually fail
To arise with the scent of a rose
Wait a moment, what's this you orate
I'm not an ejected noodle from the soup?
I guess it's not "goodbye and farewell"
You can just forget all of that poop!
Written by
Virginia Mitchell
Categories:
bereavement, death, emotions, farewell, feelings, humor, metaphor,
A Sad Thanksgiving Senryu
Somber Thanksgiving-
Hospital bedside mourning
The turkey has passed
.
Written by
Gail Foster
Categories:
appreciation, character, death, drink, farewell, humor, tribute,
Farewell Father Jack
So, farewell then, Father Jack
Let this be writ upon a plaque
"All things pass;
Drink, feck, ****..."
by Gail
Written by
Ayesha Karim
Categories:
butterfly, city, desire, fantasy, farewell, for him, funny,
The Stranger
The Stranger
I sit beside a handsome guy.
I imagine his breath on my neck.
He is tall.
His brown eyes are nice and,
O he has such gorgeous brown skin,
dark hair and a deep tan.
I want to kiss him on the lips.
I gesture towards him.
He moves a few inches and gets up.
Then leaves….
I realize I don’t know his name.
Written by
Warren Doll
Categories:
farewell, funny, humor,
Limerick
There was a lady named Cass
Who on her deathbed passed gas
Respecting the dead
All stayed close to the bed
Hoping it would be her last
Written by
Isor Chand
Categories:
best friend, betrayal, depression, farewell, friendship, hilarious,
Friendship
Friend is mirror like and shadow type,
Mirror never lie, shadow never leave a life.
Before a mirror breaks, handle with care,
For no smith ever mended a broken mirror,
Or else the pieces may leave you some scar.
If some nights lost light and create horror,
Look by your sides , look around - near and far,
You will never find a shadow standing here and there.
Friend is mirror like and shadow type,
Mirror needs care and shadow is light-like.
Written by
George Aul
Categories:
farewell, humor,
Hello, I Must Be Going
A long time ago
my eyes beheld your beauty,
your thoughts beheld... Bye?
Written by
Carl Jent
Categories:
crazy, farewell, funny, humorous, leaving,
Getting Out of Hear
At any rate, now I must flee
time to leave this dreaded place
with a run, a leap, on to destiny
nevermore amongst human race.
Nor to let anyone know
not a single good bye
no hesitation, time to go
let's see if I can fly.
Run so fast, all I see
bright, glorious sky ahead
my future lay ahead of me
or will I end up dead?
Now the leap into space
distance was never a notion
falling, failing without grace
sadness, as I splash the ocean.
Written by
Siza Sibiya
Categories:
best friend, desire, emo, farewell, funny love, heart, heartbreak,
Morning Feeling
Bring the concept of two ship sailing
Tis the respect of our love failing
Pale in contrast, a picture painting
Heads are lost by two harts fainting
Bring romance but lust is fading
Tis the dance of baiting
This the stance of no rhythm more dating
This is my stance of no more paying
This is your stance our love failing
Tis the chance for walls are breaking
The heart in my chest, sick pains are taking
To bleed the bed of love not making
Bring the hands of our love creating
Cooked in the love of our hearts were baking
Form the land, this love not shaking
This is the stance, love was framing
This is the dance love was pacing
This is the love that kept hearts razing.
Written by
Earl Schumacker
Categories:
best friend, crazy, education, farewell, fun, funny, drug,
Teddy Bear - Strange Love
Teddy Bear - Strange Love
Our new neighbors have guns and drugs
They call me Teddy
Silly!....my toy is Teddy…. Teddy Bear
They must be crazy
I love my little bear
We’re happy happy happy skipping down the street!
One day the neighbor guy took my teddy
Threw him in the air
Like a taxidermist dream
I screamed, “Teddy can’t fly leave him be!”
The bad man zeroed in on Teddy
With an AK-47 in hand
And blew my friend away.
The tiny head flew off
Stuffing everywhere
Daddy!
Oh Daddy come quick!
I think my teddy is sick!