Humorous and funny Future poems and/or funny poems about Future. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Future funny poems!
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
environment, future, humor, planet,
Mars Bars
Mars Bars
I think they painted it all red
so that we’d think it really dead
get the thought out of our head
they would let us share a bed.
Perhaps they hacked Mars “google maps”
to screw up our best thinkers caps
installed the “red-dead” planet app
in brownish shade of crusty past
to insure we’d change our mind
look elsewhere in our search to find
another place to colonize
after this one slowly dies.
They have watched our pestilence
defy the laws of common sense
will not succumb to our pretense
good neighbors do not need a fence.
John G. Lawless
6/22/2015
submitted to – Subject Mars – Poetry Contest
sponsor – Joe Maverick
Written by
Joe Dimino
Categories:
bird, change, environment, fish, future, humorous
The Windmills of Babel
Build them wider, taller
let us reach for the sky
when we run out of bird's
we'll clip angels on the fly
90,000 lb. sperm whale
wandering, searching for
his misplaced tail...
but elite global outlets will
never fail....only us commoners
stuck in the dark, our vehicles
needing, only one gear~ Park!
Written by
Dave Moore
Categories:
analogy, animal, future, god, humorous, life
Devilution
Before there was a thing called "Man"
The Maker had a better plan.
He filled he sea with little fish
Of every kind that He might wish.
Then He made the dinosaur
To rule the land from shore to shore.
Next came the monks, orang-otan.
Gorillas, and an ape called "Man".
Man is half God, and beast one half.
He writes his own grim epitaph.
The Maker thinks, "Next time the plants?
Not yet, until I've tried the ants".
Written by
Jim Healey
Categories:
humor,
Past, Present, Future
In an obscure location,
where the forest was dense,
the past, present and future walked into a bar.
It was tense.
Written by
Gail Debole
Categories:
future, humor, sister, vanity,
Shared Ego - Year 2030
Written by Gail DeBole on September 12, 2013
There once were siamese-like twins
Who didn't share organs or limbs.
An ego was shared
Thoughts moving through air
Between sisters Donna and Kim.
With an ego bigger than most
The twins did nothing but boast
of trophies and wins
And spectacular whims.
The sisters were known coast-to-coast.
Written by
John Trusty
Categories:
funny, future, imagination, planet,
Spaceship
As I drift along the cosmos
taking eons for my thoughts to osmos.
Here’s an idea that might sound ALIEN,
just show some MOON to keep from failin.
Originating from a place called Ur-anus,
not a PLANET but designed to contain us.
Try converting your STUN GUN
to ignite the methane for fun.
You’re destined to be a galactic STAR,
by keeping those cheeks ajar.
If you try this poetic dictum
don’t explode or you’ll become a victim.
You need to arrive sans detonation
uncharred by self-immolation.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
break up, future, hope, humorous, relationship,
Vacancy To Fill One Lonely Heart - For Contest
My Ex Husband:-
Lied to me
Was often drunk and violent
Belittled me
Spent all my money
Ran off with my best friend ...
HE’S FIRED!
Position is now vacant
the new applicant needs to be:-
Honest
Teetotal and gentle as a lamb
Stand by me through thick and thin and not put me down
Solvent enough to buy me the odd bunch of flowers or an orchid
Loyal – (the only real friends I have left are male!)
If you think you can fill this position ...
YOU’RE HIRED!
Contest: The Interview – Judy Konos
7th June 2015
Jan Allison
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
body, funny, future, life, old, remember
Pee In a Cup -
Get up
Shower
Pee in a cup
Cough - Give blood
Only when told
But don’t give too much
When you are old -
Urine’s no better
When you are told
Vary your stream,
Your colors
But – Don’t be too bold-
Now-
Not too fast-
Get a strong hold-
Try to remember
What’s in front -
And behind you -
When you are old
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
allegory, faith, food, funny, philosophy,
A Day In the Near Future
What dark force wears the devil’s mark (666)
And bites those thrown off “Noah’s Ark”?
Dragging sweets through the mud
While chomping for blood...
A bully is like a white shark*
*Only white sharks have better table manners, and so in the tradition of Emily Post—the innocent eventually rise up and seek justice—and use knives (and forks and spoons)!
This poem was inspired by Laura Breidenthal's recent poem entitled "666".
Written by
Shanity Rain
Categories:
art, career, change, future, humor, humorous
Shanity Rain
So many amazing Artist ~
one would never complain
Just to be amongst all Soup
my name will never be plain
I love all indiscriminately
My friends you'll remain
Not to confuse or cause pain
for the reason lies not in Vain
From now on just call me
Shanity Rain ~
However my Children remind me , I'm Insane ~
' Shanity Rain my new Pen name '
Written by
Andrea Dietrich
Categories:
devotion, funny, visionary
Future Prediction For Home Buyers
Forget about mortgage or rent.
These days with our paychecks fast spent,
In the future I see
The hot question will be. . .
How much for one BIG sturdy tent?
For Carolyn Devonshire's Contest: Economic Woes Limerick
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
america, future, humorous,
God Save America
In 2020 Kayne West says he plans to run for President
Oh heaven help you all
Kim Kardashian for first lady
I wonder….
Will her first request be
To pain the White House…
PINK
God Bless America
31st August 2015
Written by
Marilyn Williams
Categories:
depression, faith, for him, funny, future, memory
Do I Remember
I write it, but remember not.
I say it, but forget me not.
I feel it how it has to come,
did I not feel like a perfect bum.
So what it is I am trying to remember,
my place and where I was December.
Written by
David Fisher
Categories:
age, christmas, funny love, future,
A Kiss Under the Mistletoe
When I look into a crystal ball
These are some things that I see
Hearing loss will be my down fall
And my wife won’t listen to me
Look up dear, its mistletoe
Please to give this gal a kiss?
What’d you say, you miss my toe
And you’d like to reminisce?
Oh my goodness, see their tree
And the lovely treats to eat?
Now why on earth did you ask me
If I want to greet your feet?
I just heard the whistle blow
So I’ll think I’ll have some tea
Why didn’t you say there’s mistletoe
I’ve been saving a kiss for thee.
12/15/13
Written by
James Fraser
Categories:
funny, life, future,
Jurassic James
My name is Jurassic James
An ageing Dinosaur it seems
Middle aged I have hit
Quite frankly it's ****
Take me back to twenty to dream
Wonderful, I'm now back to that time
Playing pool and every things fine
I'm out with the boys
Getting pissed and enjoying
Meeting girls and being so entwined
Then there was the night one met
The right one my future was set
Now married with kids
My pool days now rid
Decisions made, now no regrets
Now back to the future we go
A dark horse now starts to show
What's fixed is now broken
Jurassic James has now spoken
I'm now free and single you know
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/me-3.php
Written by
Zoria Gregory
Categories:
funny, future, happiness, joy, time,
Window To the Future
There was a time
I can attest
A window to the future
Joy was there
As many others
Happiness came as her tutor
As we jumped
In and out
Our hearts all a flutter
What did we find
But the trappings of time
We had landed betwixt each other
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
age, body, funny, future, health, life
Snap, Crackle and Pop
WAKE UP OUT OF BED
BODY GOES SNAP, CRACKLE AND POP
BUT AT LEAST I’M NOT DEAD
Written by
Thaomi Pham
Categories:
fun, future, giggle, soulmate,
Country Boy Come This Way
I'm a city girl,
looking for a cow boy.
He'd teach me how to twirl
to the folk dance near the bay.
I'll listen to him yodel
and watch him feed cute horses hay.
There won't be a note he can't handle
cause he sings and plays the guitar everyday.
He'd take me around the world
with his big old truck while he screams, "Make way!"
I'll want my life to be simple:
raise children, make sure the crops are okay, etc.
On the porch swing, we'll cuddle.
Moon lights and shooting stars flash away.
...here's a bucket for you to hurl,
but I'll marry a country boy one day!
Written by
Jimmi Canada
Categories:
anniversary, art, funny, future, november, riddle
Better
Orange reef,
a riddler on relief;
an ancient beat-
a walking priest,
a breed!
An ancient thief-
floating on now,
foraging in the great wild,
...it was like a drum,
oh it was so fun,
yadda da da da.
Written by
John Beam
Categories:
allusion, future, grave, humor, introspection, irony
Future Tense
The ghost of future past lines chiseled upon his face at least they spelled my name right
Written by
Milan Georges Burovac
Categories:
beauty, deep, funny love, future, god, i love you
Eternal Blue
need to know where to look? soft
forms to the caresses of an eternal
wandering in search of beauty
perfect for the indefinite aesthetic
and the body to film
and soul for the soul
and the spirit of the infinite
Written by
Girisha Suneja
Categories:
best friend, december, funny, future, girl, green
Dont Tell
don’t ask! don’t tell!
Daddies in the well.
Its ok you wont go to hell,
don’t ask ,don’t tell !
Never kiss and tell,
don’t tell lies ,go into your shell,
I asked ,I told ,
Now am in a hole.
Living like a hermit,
Washing off the scabs of shame,
Believing I’ am to blame.
don’t ask! don’t tell I’ am drowning in the well.
Sinking into the depths of hell,
Floating all alone.
Written by
Martin Kloess
Categories:
animal, funny, future, humor, mystery, nature
The Frog Who Could See His Future
While watching man jog to his friend
A frog croaked a future portend
Man finished his jog
By sitting on log
And that’s how the frog met his end
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
computer, funny, future, growth, life,
Super Box
look up in the sky information in the air able to leap over tall buildings information everywhere more speed than a locomotive more bytes than a mosquito stuffing my box
cramming my brain hope it will rain to slow it down for a nano-second so that I can take a
breath knowing that the machine can’t breathe yet!
Written by
J Clinton Smith
Categories:
daughter, family, funny, life, love, son
Warning For Future Parents
What to do when starting at 1
2 at a time now 3 is done
4 is fun yet 5 has come
and 6 is here should we've begun
Oh no now 7 could this be true
and 8 and 9 what to do
add a 1 and no more too
that makes 10 what a crew
Remember though when starting
at 1 that making the kids is part of the fun
So I warn you all when starting at 1
be responsible in your love with your daughters and sons