Humorous and funny Goose poems and/or funny poems about Goose. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Goose funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Goose Poems.
Poem Details | by
Shane Cooper |
Categories:
funny, husband, wife,
When you come home late at night
Open the door and turn on the light
You had better be extremely quite
Or your goodly wife you may excite
And I'm sure she will not be polite
When she orders you out of her sight
There is no use trying to be contrite
The dog will have company overnight
Your goose is well and truly cooked alright
Poem Details | by
William Robinson |
Categories:
animals, funny, on work and working, people,
A novice goose farmer named Sanders,
Once wrote for advice from Ann Landers.
He'd encountered a block
To increasing his flock:
He didn't know gooses from ganders.
Poem Details | by
Gary Bechter |
Categories:
funny
Startled geese hiding,
Huddling in the dense brush
Roasted goose dinner...
Poem Details | by
Jacquelyn Sturge |
Categories:
funny, blue, boy,
They have poor Little Boy Blue tending sheep
That's why he got tired and fell asleep,
Other kids on the court
Shooting hoops playing sport,
He's scared of his dad and won't say a peep.
Well the cows went and eat up all the corn
And they want poor Boy Blue to blow his horn,
Why 'twas not a drum set
Or guitar, better yet,
The cows and the sheep to him would be drawn.
Didn't his parents know the Child Labor Laws
Or somebody forgot to read that clause
Protective Services
Should be called into this,
They should hire workers to meet that cause.
Poem Details | by
John Williams |
Categories:
animal, dog, children, funny,
A dog and a goose
For some unknown reason,
Fell hopelessly in love
Last Spring season.
He serenaded her
With his barking voice,
She wobbled at the wings
With his barking choice.
Next he started plucking
His country guitar,
He pawed out a tune,
She fell in love so far.
Then they sailed on
A river boat cruise,
He howled at the moon,
Then sung her the blues.
Now both have returned
To their rustic farm,
Goose still swooning
At his doggy charm.
They moved in together
In a haystack barn,
He tends to sheep
While she knits their yarn.
Poem Details | by
Rudolph Rinaldi |
Categories:
fantasy, first love, funny, funny love, longing, love, true love,
I love my goose
Some people love their wife
Some people their dog
I hug my pillow
Maybe two
Poem Details | by
Jacquelyn Sturge |
Categories:
funny,
They called Georgie Porgie pudding and pie
Why'd they give that name to a little guy?
Georgie won't brush his teeth
And his breath smelled like feet,
That's why kissing the girls made them cry.
The name Georgie Porgie was not so hot
It's his parents who put him in this spot,
All his best friends are girls
He played with lace and pearls,
Every boy in town want to kick his butt.
So poor Georgie Porgie was on the run
To him kissing the girls was having fun,
That was until one day
A strange boy came to play,
Now Georgie's having fun with his new bun.
Poem Details | by
Michael White |
Categories:
funny
Oh mother Hubbard went to the cub bard to fetch her dog a bone
but in 2008 if he had not ate P.E.T.A would picket her home
that old lady who lived in the shoe
with all the kids knowing not what to do
she put in a paternity suit she should not have bothered
live on Maury " your are not the father"
mary had a little lamb who's fleece was white as snow
he followed her to school one day for lunch they had gyros
three little kittens
lost their mittens
and they began to cry
they crept in the store
and stole some more
and now they are warm and dry
i just needed to type something to fu fill my obligation to my self to write
something every day.
Poem Details | by
Brian Eatherton |
Categories:
funny
I once said 'Boo' to a goose,
And the bird cried 'BOO BOO' back.
You may thimk you're ready,
But you're never prepared for that.
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
bird, humorous,
A most majestic fowl is the goose!
'Tis a thing of beauty in flight,
As it wings in V-formation so tight!
But, alas, its bowels are awfully loose!
Poem Details | by
Alan Douglas |
Categories:
animals, death, funny, history, nostalgia, war,
GOOSE BUMPS
http://i81.photobucket.com/albums/j231/the...ean/dtgeese.jpg
I'd thought I found eternal rest
cold hands folded, still, on my chest
but I hear echoes from the past
the trumpet's sound, fierce bugle blast
Coming alert, I look around
burst out laughing, see the sound
source - back to sleep with merry wave
at geese, goose-stepping on my grave ....
Alan McAlpine Douglas
Poem Details | by
Doris Culverhouse |
Categories:
funny, imagination,
My sight is blurry and in a hurry
Where is my underwear?
Have a pain in my drain, don't need to strain
Do I hear wind and rain?
My mouth feels like dandelion dust
Rinsing goose feathers or bust
Should I trust the starburst
Or just sit and curse or maybe worse?
Contest: Boisterous comedy for John Freeman
Picture of a man with the morning blues, wild nonfocusing eyes, and dandelion, goose down or starburst in his hair!!
Poem Details | by
Brian Eatherton |
Categories:
funny
I once said 'Boo' to a goose,
And the bird cried 'BOO BOO' back.
You may thimk you're ready,
But you're never prepared for that.
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
bird, humorous,
I had a fat goose and she clucked
Each time a soft feather got plucked
The goose then got old
And could not be sold
So into my oven – you’re ‘cooked’!
Thanks to Andrea Dietrich for her invaluable advice in helping me with the ending of the poem
04~25~17
Poem Details | by
Dave Vincent |
Categories:
humorous,
a goose in a trance
plucking and stuffing easy
eyes start watering
Poem Details | by
Joyce Johnson |
Categories:
funny
In the field across from me,
a sign as plain as it can be.
“Oats planted for the birds”, I read.
The flying geese pay it no heed,
and spying a stand of winter wheat
they settle on that crop to eat.
It’s testament to the absurd
a farmer puts up a sign for birds.
Poem Details | by
Bill Lindsay |
Categories:
funny,
I
just
noticed
that our oven
has a STOP TIME
button; it's probably
meant to be a STOP TIMER,
but I daren't touch it - just in case
Poem Details | by
Paul Curtis |
Categories:
funny, holiday
At Christmas time
I do like a goose
It is my one weakness
And I offer no excuse
Though it does depend
Of course on the bird
To say any different
Would be quite absurd
The quality of goose
That you are executing
Is directly related
To the bird you are goosing
Poem Details | by
Tom Bell |
Categories:
adventure, education, funny, on writing and words, parody,
Mother Goose, at the bar,
Downing pints and feeling the juice...
Had an urge, and cut one loose...
The fellow next to her fell off his stool
and looked the fool..
Everyone looked at him...
Thinking the misdeed,
Was made by this "dandy Jim"
Got back on his seat,
With a very sore caboose..
Got a whim,
And "goosed" Mother Goose..
Only a fool would antagonize her,
Mother Goose was a woman loose,
For a fool such as he,
she had no use...
And hauled off and decked this clown...
Making him the second man in Twinkle's Bar down...
Poem Details | by
David Kavanagh |
Categories:
allegory, allusion, business, humorous, loss,
price of magic beans
came at a gigantic cost
where’s my goddamn axe
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
giggle, humorous, relationship,
Mother Goose
met Dr. Suess
Now that goose
~ is on the loose
Poem Details | by
Eileen Clark |
Categories:
bird, cute, food, funny, humor, poems, poetry,
You know the old saying your goose is cooked
Whenever I hear that I really get shooked
I hear there's some truth to that nasty old saying
I'm valuable because of the many eggs I keep laying
You have to learn how to run really fast
If you don't, how long will your life last
I've learned to do more then just waddle
You'd be smart to use me as a role model
Don't get caught walking around here alone
The inside of a kettle will be your next home
Keep your bill shut, don't utter a honk or quack
If you get noticed it may be your last act
Author Eileen Clark
Poem Details | by
Sara Etgen-Baker |
Categories:
bird, funny, humor,
HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK!
HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK!
HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK! HONK!
Poem Details | by
David Crandall |
Categories:
bird, fun, humor,
You may know the greylag from a Mother Goose Rhyme.
This sort of goose lays 3 to 5 eggs at a time.
If clutch size distribution is uniform, I'm
Pretty sure the egg number will likely be prime.