Humorous and funny Grave poems and/or funny poems about Grave. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Grave funny poems!
Written by
Arthur Vaso
Categories:
beauty, cute love, grave, humor, obituary,
I Found a Girlfriend
Took me the breath of all my life
A soul mate who could consume my heart wither a smile
I found that Gothic girl after dark
A little to late to consummate
I lie in waiting with a dead round smile
Empty eyes and a lot of guile
I found a girlfriend even if late
We lie together
Frigid is our state
Written by
Tom Cunningham
Categories:
death, grave, humor,
Unlucky Jim
Beneath lie the remains of unlucky Jim
A great white shark made a meal of him
Fell off his surf board and hit by a wave
Half inside ‘Jaws’ and half in this grave.
Written on 13 September 2018
For a funny epitaph poetry contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe.
Written by
Joe Dimino
Categories:
gothic, grave, halloween, humor, irony, nonsense, silly,
Old Friends
The Ghost denied
he was a Ghost,
though clearly
I saw through --
Someone I knew
in life, back then
quite pink, substantial
with lots
and lots to do –
tried and tried
convincing him
all to no avail,
myself even now
more pale
till recognized he
dear friend, himself
who had
read my eulogy….
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
death, fish, funny, grave, life,
The Goldfish
the goldfish
looks out
at the distorted world
through a glass bowl
and tries to make sense of it
he watches the room about him
and those that feed him
with self satisfaction
unknowingly waiting for death
and a burial at sea
Written by
Tshepo Mbhele
Categories:
death, death of a friend, funeral, funny, grave, hilarious, loss,
Death Announcement
DEATH ANNOUNCEMENT:BY TSHEPO MBHELE
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR DEATH ANNOUNCED?
A POOL PARTY WITH A BALL THAT WAS BOUNCED
OR TO GO TO THE BAR
ON YOUR BRAND NEW CAR
WHEN YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO DIE
I WONT EVEN PASS BY
IT DOESN’T REALLY BOTHER ME
BECAUSE WHEN YOU WERE ALIVE I LET YOU BE
YOUR NEW HOME
WILL DEFINETLY NOT BE ROME
OR EVEN A SMALL PALACE
JUST BECAUSE YOU WERE CARELESS
SOME WILL DANCE AND SOME WILL CRY
SOME WILL COME JUST TO SAY GOOD BYE
EVEN IF IT IS A DARE
I DON’T CARE
Written by
Dorlan Tiu
Categories:
career, grave, homework, humorous, school, teacher, youth,
Walking Dead
Numbness as I walk in halls
A heavy load in my hand I bear
Tome of the ancient past
Portrays a fog in my mind
Emptiness, void and vanity
As I look at zombies like me
Consumed by an epidemic...
Which left us cold-blooded
At the darkness of dusk
When the sun shines no more
I lie below the tombstone of my grave
Devoured by a sleepy hollow in my coffin
Vitality where are you?
Where are your streams of life?
I' am lost, Where am I?
Oh wait, that's right
I'm in college
Written by
Diane Lefebvre
Categories:
anxiety, death, evil, grave, humor,
Fearful Things
I walked on by a graveyard, very late, alone one night.
No ghosts sprung from their moldy graves: no evil ghoulish sights.
It seemed no vampires lurked about, to sip my blood like wine.
And any hulking werewolves must have previously dined.
I watched in vain for zombies, with their gruesome, bloody stares.
But they seemed to be as plentiful, as wayward teddy bears.
Yet, I would duck behind a tree, on guard quite through and through,
At every car that passed me by . . transporting who knows who?
While I recalled what mother said, no doubt with some misgiving:
It’s not the dead you have to fear . . but watch out for the living!
© 2015 Diane Lefebvre
Written by
David Brooks
Categories:
car, grave, humor, teen,
Braggart
There once was a driver named Dave,
Of his driving he often would rave.
Then one day on his own, drove and talked on his phone,
Now he's bragging about his new grave.
Written by
Michael G. Weston
Categories:
death, eulogy, funeral, funny, grave, humor, moving on,
To Whom It May Concern
To whom it may concern,
For time will surely tell,
I write to my loved ones
To say that I am well.
I scarcely can recall
A time more I content,
Than here amongst my friends
With time more wisely spent.
The rooming here is quaint,
In truth, a little cramped.
Likewise, harsh April rains
Make all my walls feel damped.
The silence, although grave,
Does make for better sleep.
Yet, every passing day
More neighbors moan and weep.
I hope to see you soon,
Perhaps within the year.
For winters cold and stiff
Are awfully lonely here.
Until we meet again,
I wish you all the best.
For my death after all
Is quite the restless test.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
dance, grave, humorous, moon,
The Graveyard Shift
ghostly figures dance
diaphanous dresses swirl
in the pale moonlight
it’s the graveyard shift
on the eve of Halloween
we’re in good spirits!
10/10/17
Senryu Contest
Sponsored by Laura Loo
Written by
John Beam
Categories:
allusion, future, grave, humor, introspection, irony, word play,
Future Tense
The ghost of future past lines chiseled upon his face at least they spelled my name right
Written by
John Beam
Categories:
allusion, grave, humor, jealousy, word play,
Flogging a Dead Horse
While snarkers strive with proud but fruitless disdain Wounded immortals try the slaying of the slain Quit beating the dead metaphor let it go and watch it roll down hill
Written by
Margarita Lillico
Categories:
death, grave, humorous, life,
Between a Rock and a Hard Place
Life was a burden till death set me free -
Now granite gravestone being hard on me?!
November 15, 2021
Written by
Keith D Trestrail
Categories:
death, humorous,
A Grave Confession
It’s not so bad being dead and all,
it’s quiet in here where the worms crawl.
But when I reminisce
there isn’t much I miss
‘cept a cold beer and a booty call!
Written: August 2014
Written by
Muhammad Safa Thajudeen
Categories:
absence, death, earth, grave, humorous,
Grave
"Grave mistake"
"Grave is not mistake-
Nobody can miss it and everybody to take"
Written by
Arthur Vaso
Categories:
art, day, grave, humorous, imagination, introspection,
I Am Dead and I Am Leaving
Eight hours of toiling in the sun
With pick and axe digging for rum
Captive to the sentence yet
Prisoner to none
Hard labour, and this sure ain’t fun
Sweating in the heat, shoveling the dun
Digging and digging this work never done
Callused hands and a back carrying tons
The sun is setting, yet escape seems far
After all the digging is the gravel and tar
I am dead, dead dead!
Dead tired and wish I was in bed
So fair warning I am leaving here soon
Leaving this torture, to sing another tune
Leaving, I am to fetch me some brew
Some Tim Horton’s coffee and maybe some stew
brb
ummmm a coffee shop, lets see what trouble I can get into there!!!!! :)
Written by
Curtis Moorman
Categories:
death, funny, grave,
A Funny Epitaph
A FUNNY EPITAPH
'Neath this soil lies Uncle Roy
Dirty tricks were his great joy
His dying words were not a trick
He said, "I told you all that I was sick"
15 September 2018
For the contest sponsored by Jesse Rowe
Written by
Margarita Lillico
Categories:
humorous, love,
Grave Love
Roses are red, violets are blue -
My old wounds have bled from the thorns you spew.
Yet your scent I crave,
From beyond the grave,
Stirred, stiff and still - waiting for you!
February 7, 2022
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
culture, drink, grave, humor, longing, silly, woman,
Last Call
Jo King loved frothy tankards of beer
Which she drank every day of the year
Interred in a keg
She swallowed each dreg
So her tombstone reads, "Wish you were here!"
Written by
Beatrix Macabre
Categories:
art, beautiful, beauty, class, confidence, crazy, dark, deep, drink, emotions, fear, fun, giggle, gothic, grave, horror, longing, lust, me, metaphor, mother, mystery, passion, poems, poetess, poetry, poets, scary, sensual, sexy, sick, sin, spanish, surreal, visionary, voice, wine, woman, women, word play, words, write, writing,
No One Is Looking
Cadence lowers its tenebrous tempo
Dulcet to a morose Memento Mori-bund
Lachrymose ribbon garnet fountain
Ruby rivulets in wine glass Chardonnay
Bubble floats to pop
Silence yet I sway
Miasma tang vitae oh Nueva
So they swing on a rope seputchra
Momma Mia mommy
Bites her lips
Somersault flips
Debauchery
In my hidden boutique adornment boudoir
My basement locked ossuary
Written by
James Horn
Categories:
body, grave, humor,
No One Who Wanted
No One Who Wanted
Diggity, doggity, diffle and daffle
Whole mid-East off really wanted to raffle;
To buy tickets people down were hunted;
In the end, there was no one who wanted.
James Thomas Horn
PS. She had her breasts made out of silicone
Which were broken by someone casting a stone
And yet always true to a flippant form
Around dead body people would swarm.
With dead body had been enchanted
And after into the ground it was planted
And everything was over and done
We ended up catching it all on a re-run.
James Thomas Horn
Retiret Veteran
Written by
Edward Ibeh
Categories:
grave, humor, writing,
An Epitaph For Joel
Here lies an alcoholic, Joel, he loved gin
And he drank it until liquor mortis set in
A Funny Epitaph Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Jesse Rowe
Date written and posted: 09/12/2018
Written by
Marc O'Brien
Categories:
football, funny, games, grave, high school, leadership, usa,
Outside The Beltway Thoughts On Chiefs vs Ravens September 5, 2024
Edgar my dear
Why do you have that spear
Is that your plan?
When in a jam?
Scare the bloody Kansas City yellow and red
When they fight the fowl volture appearing dead
Spirit Haunting
Spirit Daunting
Blazing under the Baltimore sun
Until Poe's poetic message is done
No swift moves will be here
Only Chiefs carcasses holding their Daly beer
Written by
Subimal Sinha-Roy
Categories:
grave, humorous, sleep,
Sleep
SLEEP
Here lies my dear uncle Jack
On his sides he always slept deep
On new bed lying on his back
He can’t turn to find his sleep
April 14, 2019
Written by
Marinus Jansen
Categories:
death, grave, humor, silly, surreal,
No burial, just a lousy cremation
No burial
When I died, my family didn’t dare bury me in a grave.
They knew, without a doubt, I'd only misbehave ~
that I'd party with the germs,
and have sleepovers with the worms,
and give the bacteria all that they crave.
So, just a lousy cremation
When I watched them cremate my body,
I thought their work was just a little bit shoddy.
I woulda preferred
if the fire had been hotter by a third,
and if my friends had been invited over
to toast me with a hot toddy.