Funny Poems About Hair or Hair Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Hair poems and/or funny poems about Hair. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Hair funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Hair Poems.

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: age, beauty, funny, hair, old, silly, silver,

No Blue Hair

No blue hair or curls for me. I’ll grow old naturally. Hanging breasts and flattened bum, crooked teeth and graying gum. Sagging knees and chicken skin, sunny spots and double chin. Silver streaks through thinning hair, dimming eyesight no repair. Crinkly crow’s eyes and flat feet singing as the Maker I meet. I don’t care what you say, I can’t hear you anyway.

Poem Details | by Wilma Neels |
Categories: funny, imaginationhair,

-Nose hair madness-

I think I saw one I move a little closer there’s another one nose hair can be disgusting Nikko should I pull them out?
*Nikko's body part of choice nose hair lol*

Poem Details | by Mark Goodson |
Categories: funny, health, life, hair,

The Wisdom of Wine and Gin

My hair has receded and my belly grown fat
There’s hair growing in my ears and I don’t like that
My joints ache all the day and I have troubles with peeing
I’m tired all the time and have glasses for seeing
Gravity has taken over putting life in a downward spin
No wonder I enjoy drinking a little wine and gin

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Its a Hair Affair

I can see you stop and stare
At my horrible purple hair
I declare ,life is so not fair
For I tried and tried to repair
This miserable hair affair
Some advice Id like to share
Of changing appearance be aware
 Follow directions with great care
Or you may gaze with sad despair
  ........  At a head of purple hair

Just written in jest
For the new contest

Poem Details | by Michelle Faulkner |
Categories: funny, gender, hair, silly,

All's Fair in Love and Hair

There was a man from you-know-where
Who liked his ladies bare, down there
He met a bald gal
Who said, 'Call me Al'
Showing more, down there, than just hair!


Lines 1, 2 and 5 - 8 syllables

Lines 3 and 4 - 5 syllables

For Bawdy Limerick PG-13 contest
Sponsor: Tania Kitchen

Poem Details | by David Drowley |
Categories: death, humorous, life, love,


Please keep me from falling
I’m a hair on your head.
Don’t leave me some morning
All alone on our bed.

Don't let me be parted
Or removed from my roots.
Please keep me from falling
To be trampled by boots.

Don’t take me out swimming
But left floating behind.
Gargling in a pool drain
I would find most unkind.

If I should live to be
Your last hair when you're dead
I’ll drop in the coffin
To curl up by your head.

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: giggle, hair,

Halfway There

  I found a comb in my pocket there

    ~ Now I just need to find some hair

Poem Details | by Smail Poems |
Categories: age, angel, baseball, beauty, butterfly, caregiving, celebration, character, child, father daughter, feelings, film, fishing, flower, football, children, for her, friend, fun, funny, gender, girl, girlfriend, giving, graduation, grandfather, grandmother, grandparents, growing up, growth, hair, happiness, happy, health, heart, hero,


Pretty princesses
Dancing all around
Frolicking through fields
Very beautiful
Just like you!

Poem Details | by Peter Dome |
Categories: hair, humor, humorous, imagination, school,

The Nit Nurse An Itchy Poem

The Nit nurse would come around once a month
To my primary school usually after lunch 
We'd all queue up in a line
All the kids and friends of mine.

One by one the nurse would examine our hair 
Once in a while the scruffier one's in the class
Were given a brown paper bag and letter for their mum
And told to run home fast.

You could say I was a bit slow
But it took me years before I got to know what was in that 
Brown paper bag.

I never got one myself
My hair must have been in perfect health
But I don't know why but I'm suddenly beginning to itch
I swear and it's not just my hair
Do you feel itchy now too?

Peter Dome.Copyright.2015.May.

Poem Details | by RUDOLPH RINALDI |
Categories: dream, funny, hair, life, lost, love, peace,

where has it gone

we had hair 
in the 1960s
where has it gone
we had
love and peace

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny, hair, hair,

Year of the Wig

(This is a true story from 2001, when I let my
hair grow back to dark, and I fooled a few people
who thought the wig was still my own hair but with 
a different shade of blonde!)

Growing roots meant bad hair each day;
bought a wig to stay blonde at school.
One guy loved my color that way.
Said, "Your hair's never looked so cool!"

For Rick Parise's "A Bad Hair Day" Contest
using Chastushka (Russian form of poetry
with trochaic tetrameter).

Poem Details | by Dan Kearley |
Categories: funny, humorous, hair, wisdom,

Two Grey Hairs Of Wisdom

I have just two grey hairs in my mustache
That keep growing back,under my nose
Why there's just two
I haven't a clue
Soon to be joined by many more,I suppose

They say grey hair grows with wisdom
But with just two hairs under my nose?
No matter what I do
They keep growing through
The beginning of wisdom for me,I suppose

Two grey hairs I've plucked and cut
From my mustache under my nose
For now there's just two
Soon to be joined by quite a few
A lesson learned in wisdom for me,I suppose

Dan Kearley:2-15-13  

Poem Details | by TAMMY REAMS |
Categories: fashion, for him, funny, hair, hilarious, humor,


It flips and flops from side to side 
and if the wind is blowing it will be going.
One ear is covered and the other is not
a curl or lock tied into a topknot.
Some look like a big fluffy feather that's been in a hazard
or the tail of a horse that's been forced.
Don't be scared because your missing hair
to a women a shinny bald spot is always hot!

1/23/15   T Reams

Poem Details | by Joan Warburton |
Categories: funny, hair,

Hair raiser

Hair Raiser

Why are there hairs in your nose Daddy?
Why are there hairs in your nose?
They grow as you get older son
That’s the way it goes.

Why are there hairs on your chest Daddy?
Why are there no hairs on mine?
Hairs on your chest come later my son
Hairs on your chest, take time.

Why are there no hairs on your head Daddy?
Why not a hair on your head?
Hair on the head is an optional Extra
Now eat up your dinner, then BED...

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

A Bad Hair Day

Purple spikes pointing toward the sky
Do you suppose he woke that way?
Can anyone tell me the reason why
He'd strive to have " A Bad Hair Day'?

Poem Details | by cheryl hoffman |
Categories: hair, humor,

Bad Hair Day

Today my hair had a mind of its own,
being in the static electricity zone,
put in some mousse,
still looked uncouth,
walking around like an Alfalfa clone.


Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: anti bullying, funny, giggle, hair, hilarious, humor,

little shopper

a woman standing four foot two
went shopping to buy some shampoo
with shoppers aghast
a snob clerk let blast
madam what a meager hairdo

Poem Details | by Brenda Rose |
Categories: celebration, feelings, friendship, funny love, imagery, inspirational, tribute,

Claire's Hair Salon

Don't come here but please go there
For this is what I have to share
About our dear hairdresser Claire.
She'll never catch you in a snare
Because her prices are more than fair.

She will cut your hair layer by layer
And will not let your head go bald or bare
So there is no glare for us to stare
And she will help you grow long wanted hair.

In this verse I have been more than fair
And if I am not I do not care
For soon I will be committed or declared
I will end this with our love for Claire
Who always has an outward flair.

So there!

Brenda Elizabeth Rose

Poem Details | by RUDOLPH RINALDI |
Categories: funny, hair, life,

I comb my head

I comb my head 
where hair once was
it rather should be buffed 
     to reflect the beauty of life 
as life does 

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: hair, humorous,

Hair Nose Perm

There once was a man from somewhere
Who had trouble with his nose hair
So he gave them a perm
With a wiggle and squirm
And won second prize at the fair

Poem Details | by Raj Napal |
Categories: children, culture, dad, hair, humor, society, teen,

Man Bun

My son is growing a man bun.
I don’t know how big it’ll be when he’s done.
He’s only sixteen you know and at his age it’s fun.
So I’ll just watch but if it gets too big, I’ll have to run.

My son is growing a man bun.
I don’t know how big it’ll be when he’s done.
He’s only sixteen you know and at his age it’s fun.
So I’ll just watch, but if it gets too big, I’ll have to run.

I told him to grow a man beard, a big bushy one, like mine.
But, he tells me that’s not for him as he’ll look like a bum.
What! Is he saying his dad is a bum and dumb?
Well, he’s a kid; he’ll be different when he grows into a man!

Poem Details | by Kate sparks |
Categories: fun, funny, giggle, hair, humor, silly,

a young man named barry

A hirsute young man named Barry
who's beard and mustache were quite scarry
cut off his hair
when presented a dare
from a woman he wanted to marry!

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, for her, for him, hair, humorous, mother son,


Phil’s caveman look is very weird He really should shave off his beard His mother is right He looks a strange sight The Neanderthal look’s to be feared! Since December Phil’s been hirsute He needs to give his beard a boot He’ll cut it off in the sink But his mum won’t cause a stink Cos without it he looks real cute! Poem Posted with Kind permission of Phillip Garcia To understand the poem please read my comments on Phillip's poem 02~26~17

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: humorous,

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Hair today, gone tomorrow, it's starting to thin really fast Thought I'd be one of those centurions with locks down past my *** Think again, old fellow You're starting to turn yellow Don't want to pass on till my youthful appearance does pass © Jack Ellison 2015

Poem Details | by Sharon Smith |
Categories: funny,

Hair Dye

Please tell me why I dye my hair,
And get red stuff everywhere.

Some people call it vanity,
I’d plum for insanity.