Humorous and funny Holy poems and/or funny poems about Holy. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Holy funny poems!
Written by
Timothy Hicks
Categories:
faith, fun, funny, humorous, religion,
Holy Humor
Jehovah's Witness' Door Pamphlets
Pious
Fly-ahs
Catholic Church During Halloween
Scary
Mary
Scrabble Night With Missionaries
Wordy
Clergy
Preacher Owning at Dungeons & Dragons
Master
Pastor
Our Holiness the Dalai Getting a Text From His Ex
Lama
Drama
Sea Anemone Makes Amends
Moral
Coral
Written by
Michael Degenhardt
Categories:
angst, funny
Holy Follicle!!
Oh, I am so angered, outraged and appalled
I think that I’m going bald
My dad had great hair
So I never really cared
But, to the hair club for men I am called
From my butt, they could extract some hair
Because I think I have so much to spare
But I cannot tell
Do you think it would smell?
Oh well I think, I’ll just leave it there
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
god, hockey, humor, sports,
march 17 hockey holy trinity
They're pagans on ice with wood sticks
And maximum pain each inflicts
But Saint Patrick knows
God prefers trios
Like three-leaf shamrocks and hat tricks
Written by
Emile Pinet
Categories:
humorous, imagery, satire,
Holy Cow-
There once was a chef named Lew
who swore Samuel's words were true
that Sacred cows make
a great tasting steak
and the best hamburgers too.
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
Quote by Samuel Clemens (A.K.A. Mark Twain)
(1835-1910) U.S. humorist, writer, and lecturer.
Written by
Paul Schneiter
Categories:
humorous,
Holy Yolks
A chicken farmer belittled native folks.
He said their beliefs were akin to jokes.
The natives put a curse on him
He laughed and called it a whim.
Until his chickens had eggs minus yolks.
Written by
Katherine Stella
Categories:
adventure, education, fantasy, children, funny, imagination, introspection, life, mystery, places, science, science fiction, space, uplifting, visionaryme,
Holy Crap
Na- Nu Na-Nu
greetings earthlings How do you do
I'm captain Zendor from planet Sur Render
shazbot someone crashed into my spaceship's fender
hit me so hard made me go krap-poo
Written by
Ernesto P. Santiago
Categories:
funny, history, life, people, social,
Holy Rasputin
There once was a sage man named Rasputin,
With filthy beards, and wore cross made of tin.
While preaching his holy crafts,
He met the queen and her staffs.
He slept with them that got him in a bin.
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
funny,
Holy Smoke
HOLY SMOKE
Alas it seems even the Pope
when poked in the rear with the “scope”
had one request
right after the test
“call the fart that came out HOLY SMOKE”
John G. Lawless
11/21/2016
Written by
Zakhe Michael Mcunu
Categories:
blessing, care, courage, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, funny love,
Holy Is the Lamb
Forgive me I have seen
More than I was supposed to see
I have sin against your name
Father forgive me for I have loved someone
More than I should have loved
She makes me feel like a king
And I treat her like an angel
She led me to sensations that I don’t know
And I took her close to my heart
Please forgive me father
For I have loved her with all my life
Thou my heart beat of air
But it ooz of all her love in my viens
Eventhough i might not see her again
Written by
Katherine Stella
Categories:
fantasy, funny, visionary
Holy Cow { Footle}
Write Now {4 sec}
Holy Cow
Entry For Matt Calir
Write Now Contest
Written by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories:
atheist, celebration, faith, food, fun, giggle, silly,
Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy
Try Our Chicken Mole
Eat and eat and eat and eat
Until you're roly poly.
Written by
James Edward Lee Sr.
Categories:
analogy, animal, dance, desire, encouraging, funny, giggle,
Salamander Dance Do Your Holy Dance
Salamander dance
Do your Holy dance
Let your praise and the promise
Be your only chance
Predestinate your glance
Look on to the King
Whose mine and yours you sing
Tho, all dogs go to heaven
Even little boys and girls
Judge not be judged by man or bores
Be not caught playing with child like toys
and when the evening has come
Gonna put Satan on the run
Do your Holy dance, dance
Do your Holy dance,
Be your only chance
Predestinated your glance
Look on toward your King
Let earth and heaven sing, sing
Salamander, dance
Do your Holy dance
04/15/14
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr.
Arranged music by Jonathan Echtinaw
Written by
Robert L. Hinshaw
Categories:
humorous, religious,
Holy Moses
There once lived a sage prophet named Moses
Who struggled forty years guiding noses
Seems the Israelites defied
Most everything he tried
Leading that mob was no bed of roses
Written by
Lisle Ryder
Categories:
humor, religion, wind,
Holy Gust
Fresh from Pentecost, our celebration
moved to lunch in the Rectory garden,
with views to the coast, for inspiration.
Spread on tablecloths we'd hardly begun
the quiche, ham, tomatoes, salad, or pies
when a westerly gust lifted our fare –
cloths and paper plates with lettuce and fries.
We reached out to grab our lunch from the air!
So rising to the challenge we gathered
and ate as fast as we could, in laughter
sharing fragments of what had been scattered,
at one as we'd been before the Altar.
Such was the tease of the Holy Spirit
to which we responded I felt with credit.
Written by
Robert Velves
Categories:
anger, anti bullying, betrayal, career, conflict, faith, humorous,
Holy Cow
Pray? But then, round and round and round..
Why can't it be done now,
Perhaps hum the incantation sound
And dance around the holy cow.
A lot of stars in a constellation
Perhaps one of them could bless a vow
Perhaps you could avoid damnation
If it's delegated to a holy sow.
So place the flowers and ornaments
Around the hooves of the holy cow
To be noticed of your moral torments,
Sing, dance, by compunction do bow
The least you can absolutely do:
Be polite when your sins are under review.
May the forest be rich for your office
Perhaps hang a picture of the holy cow
If luck favors the brave,then kiss the orifice,
I'm damned because I don't know how!
March 4, 2018
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humor,
Holy Crappola
Holy crappola
Every day that goes by
Gets tougher to remember
To do up my fly
Constantly happening
I'll be flying low
The girlies do gawk
As I put on a show
I'm totally oblivious
To the reason they titter
Imagine they find me
A big league hitter
No idea why
They look down below
I AM well endowed
Must enjoy the show
Then this kind old gent
Pointed down to my crotch
Seems after I peed
To zip I forgot
Embarrassed no
Disappointed yes
Was enjoying the girlies
Attention, I guess!
© Jack Ellison 2013
Written by
James Horn
Categories:
humorous,
Trump Member of Holy Grail
Trump Member of Holy Grail
When you finally start to fail
Out you should start to bail
And ship you forget to trim
Can't imagine having him
Is Trump member of Holy Grail?
James Horn
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humor,
Holy Gosh Darn
How many of youse guys remember these
Well golly gee, holy cow, gosh darn, gee willikers
Way back when they were naughty phrases
Today the naughty words are maimers and killers
How things have changed and getting uglier
Mass shootings, targeted individuals, fire starters
What's happened to the world we once knew
Civility should be deleted from each transponder
Golly gee and all that holy mackerel stuff
Thinking of it things haven't really been much better
Since day one man has been fighting man
Sure haven't been sending each other love letters
Written by
Jacqueline R. Mendoza
Categories:
christian, devotion, faith, god, humorous, spiritual,
Who Is the Eternal Holy Spirit
Eternal Holy Spirit
The third person of the Blessed Trinity
Has a divine majesty as Eternal Father
The Eternal Son
Date Written: 2162020
Time Written: 3:10 pm
Source: CAT 2010 PG. 35
Poetry Form: Quatrain
Written by
Bobby May
Categories:
fashion, funny,
Holy Jeans
It seems that religion is really picking up with theses young ladies
The fad today at Least in the United States is, Holy Jeans
Never in my entire life would I have expected this to be a fad
I have several pair that I use working in my wood shop
I guess they do this to make people think they actually work
I think the next date I go on I will wear them to impress her
Written by
Randy Johnson
Categories:
funny,
Holy Crap
(This is a fictional poem)
A bunch of punks stole my glasses.
I tried very hard to kick their _____.
But without my specs, I can't see.
They beat the holy crap out of me.
Please don't ever try to fight five people at once.
Or like me, you'll be in a wheelchair for months.
They kicked my ___ and now I can't see or walk, what am I going to do?
My food has to be put in a blender because without teeth, I can't chew.
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
funny, humorous,
The Holy Book
I have a hole in the book
Where a little worm ate
In little bites
It took
And let in the light
The worm knew not
What it read
How holy the book
Or what it said
I read the book
The story as told
Need be with faith
Holes and all
The worm
Left the book
I used it as bait
To catch the fish
That kept the faith
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
giggle, humorous,
Holy
A wholly holy hole
In a hole wholly holy,
Is a whole of a holy hole--
If the whole's not wholly unholy!