Humorous and funny Human poems and/or funny poems about Human. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Human funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Human Poems.
Terry L. Allen
Nothing in the world so disarming,
so charming in it's domain.
Across a crowded room or two feet away
it's all the same.
The shortest distance between two people
despite any other claim.
Is for now and will forever be
with no denial the human smile.
We will all die
So we cry loud
And try for thought.
Wrong lane, wrong way.
Death delay, pray.
Cars stray and honk.
Oh, please, cars – clear.
Turns appear soon,
I steer, we cheer.
... CayCay Jennings
February 13, 2016
the pain of being human
can be negated
in a steady supply, i might add
there is nothing worse
than waking up
out of beer
and being human
I go out seeking the sun's rays
I lay there torturing myself
I return inside
fantasy, funny, humor, humorous, imagination,
humor, internet, life, romance, satire, silly,
We met online
taking time to
Across the miles
we used smiles to
beguile and spurn
A page to turn
with well-earned tales
of learned lessons
For ‘Than-Bauk on Human Folly’ Contest by Marugu Mo
Form: Than-Bauk – Three Stair-Cased Verses
Little green creature,curious and ingenius,
left his space craft to catch a lady Venus,
she touched his chest!
he grabbed her breast!
Sex time- No Adam's Mac pack,Green Alien
Not for the contest but tnks.
Caroline Devonshire,for the inspiration :)
humor, nature, tree,
Forests are felled
There once dwelled life -
Now quelled by greed.
Pulp to paper -
The razor tears
Through curtained flesh
Let’s laud our wit -
Bark - on it.. We
have writ ‘Save trees’!
Than-Bauk (Non staircased) Syllable count checked
'Dwelled' is one form of the past tense for 'dwell'. 'Dwelt' is used more commonly, but I used the first version to fit the rhyme.
conflict, confusion, funny love,
If I don’t say hi,
Or instead of talking, I sigh,
Don’t ask me why,
I’m only human.
When you look at me then I shy,
Or when you inquire from me I lie,
Don’t ask me why.
When I leave without saying Bye
Or when I live as if I want to die,
Don’t ask me why.
When I quit without giving it a try
And my face swells like that of a pie
Don’t ask me why.
When I look at you and feel to cry
Though my eyes are as dry,
Still don’t ask me why,
Because I’m only human.
Autumn can be really depressing if you let it
Takes super human will power to smile, I'll admit
But stop for a minute
While eating your spinach
It's certainly not reason for murder to commit
© Jack Ellison 2015
art, funny, life, parody
In the hunting field known as Wal-Mart
with meat we fill our cart
with beef pork and poultry
in our robes looking so sultry
we feast on the wild america
from the safety on aisle two
we shop as if we nothing else to do
we hunt for bargains
we wheel and deal
and cut coupons
all to safe 55 cents on grey poupon
we roam in packs
purses replacing sacks
we hunt relentlessly for bulk prices
and buy our meat by the slices
Human Beings have many things,
They drink milk and eat chocolaty silk.
Human Beings are doctors and teachers,
Human Beings are also cheaters.
Human Beings have mobiles and phones,
Phones also have many tones.
Human Beings have shelter like house,
Computer has only one mouse.
Human Beings are afraid of ghost,
They do breakfast of bread and toast.
Human Beings are also hero,
Aryabhatta has discovered zero.
One day there will be the end of Human Beings,
Who has discovered all the things.
Carl is handsome
Beth says come dear
Beth’s spouse comes close
Breaks Carl’s nose bone
Fierce blows rain soon
Quick comes Carl’s wife
Like sharp knife edge
Life rife with pulls
20 February 2016
Than-Bauk on Human Folly – Poetry Contest by Marugu Mo
Checked on: www.howmanysyllables.com
The Next Step In Human Evolution
By Elton Camp
Since human genes have been mapped
To new possibilities they have to adapt
Perhaps there will come a new way
One’s genetic instructions to convey
Genes composed of A, T, G and C
May be sent just as quick as can be
Desired qualities they can then pick
Avoid those able to make a child sick
For a uterus there will be no need
Into a replicator the genes feed
Then will come an electronic whirl
And out will pop a baby boy or girl
Who are you?
I don’t know!
Where do you come from?
I don’t know!
Where are you going?
I don’t know!
What do you want?
I don’t know!
Why are you here?
I don’t know!
allusion, how i feel, humorous,
I treated this strange creature with great care
I knew she was not human, so unfair
She looked like my old cat before it died
Someone give her food, make sure it’s fried
She could not mew nor bark nor did she speak
I did not tell her that she was a freak
She liked to use her hair as a defence
Peering out as if in recompense
But if I’d cut it off, she would have screamed
As she watched the music fly in streams
She saw her visions and she talked to Lights
Noone human is vouchsafed such sights
But still I liked to gorge on her cheese flan
She might not act quite human but who can?
The human brain is a unique device,
It continuously functions round the clock,
From birth till death, but stops his work
When you bought a TV. From first a glance!
funny, life, people,
Sit In here, in my own stink,
Can’t fit my head, in my sink.
They let U out, when they want,
Most of them, will even taunt.
I ask to bathe, she say: “Maybe”
“If I have time”, how they play me.
But a showers not a privilege,
This is no way, 4 humans 2 live.
All I want, is 2 be clean,
Clean shirt & socks, don’t be so mean.
I’ll do my time, wont put up fights,
Just let me have my Human Rights!!!
A build up bubble,
Created in the lower half,
Began to expand in the stomache,
Stretching out the pants,
When beginning to release,
Squeezing the butt cheeks together,
Sliding out slowly,
Feeling as if it's hot as ever,
Silent but deadly,
They always say,
It happened to slip out,
Now I've ruined someones day,
The smell is as grotesque as could be,
It happens to linger,
Where it is I may be,
The smell hits the nostrils of others,
So I just look around,
Wondering what the smell is,
Just like the patrollers,
Leaving the room,
We need oxygen masks,
Or something strong,
As in a lot of blankets,
But that could do a lot of harm....
funny, husband, wife, body, power,
(This is a fictional poem)
I was struck by lightning and now my body is electrified.
My body has tons of electricity inside.
I can power things just like a generator.
My wife is making me power all of her appliances and I really hate her.
She has her blender plugged into my nose and the oven plugged into my ###.
I cause a power surge whenever I pass gas.
She has the refrigerator and the toaster plugged into my ears.
Someone please help me, I can no longer stand it here.
This is very demeaning but she doesn't care how I feel.
I have to live in misery just so she won't have to pay an electric bill.
africa, confidence, courage, dedication, freedom, humanity, humor,
don't be a machine but a human
the heart of a good man
is like the heart of God
humans are humans
not a beast in human
we all got a soul
yes you do
I do too
so I wonder still
why we fight
why do we war
where is the heart
what happened to
our God given thoughts
we are humans
we must live as one
no matter the system
no matter the hardships
we should always
hold on to peace
April 3, 2019
I hope the reader will appreciate the fact that I do not claim that
the title is crap free!
James Edward Lee Sr.
analogy, caregiving, conflict, confusion, fantasy, funny, imagery,
What if cup cakes?
Would eat humans!
What would the world be like?
What if dogs drove cars
And cats and mouse drunk from the same jar...
What if the moon were really cheese?
What, just what would it mean?
Mice and Rats now would be Lunar Astronauts,
And what about mosquitoes
Working in hospitals
Rallying and working for blood drives and banks?
This brings me all the way back
To what if cup cakes, could eat human beings
just what flavor would you be....Yuk!!!
ha, ha, ha...
Daunte Demented One
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2020©
You’re A Human Lightening Rod
By: Tom Wright
You’ve Studs in your eyebrows, a spike in your hair
Your tongue is pierced causing me to stare.
You resemble a lampshade but give me no fear
At the first sound of thunder, I’m out of here.
2nd grade, 3rd grade, 4th grade, cat, funny, halloween, humor,
Tramadah was trying to explain
Halloween to her black cat, Jermaine.
Two legged creatures go house to house.
May try to catch you. You could cough up a mouse.
It is most probably best if we stay hidden inside.
After trick-or-treating, we’ll take broomstick for a ride.
They sound terrifying her pet black cat said.
What is wrong with them? Are they zonked in the head?
A tiny bit nutty and confused if you really want to know.
They carve out pumpkins and make their insides glow.
I’ll hide in the darkest corner, way back under the bed.
These humans sound AWFUL Jermaine the cat said.