Funny Poems About Longing or Longing Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Longing poems and/or funny poems about Longing. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Longing funny poems!

Written by Richard Lamoureux
Categories: cute love, funny, longing, sexy,

Mama Warned Her

She expected very little from the guy
  A lesson she had learned long ago
     Guys are after just one thing
             It always started
               With just one
                     Kiss
               Then look out
          For wandering hands
      He would unbutton her top
  Then next he would remove her brasier
She was so excited...she could hardly wait !


Non Rhyming version of Andrea's new form.

Written by ... Gigno
Categories: emotions, happiness, humor, joy, longing, senses

Necessity

What makes you laugh until you cry
Laughter that makes you feel alive
The way it touches you cannot deny
A joy you crave to feel to survive

The softness of my lips is brave
in every way. They can't deny
the smile I imprint on their minds today
A sweet addiction you can't take away

A collaboration with Poet Destroyer A: http://www.poetrysoup.com/poems_poets/poems_by_poet.aspx?ID=18720


Written by Gary Smith
Categories: humorous, longing,

I Am Just What I Am

Here I sit on the ocean bed
Just sifting mud and ooze,
But If it was up to me
It's not the life I'd choose.

It's dark down here, there's creepy things
All looking for a feast
So I live on tenterhooks,
Hiding from the beasts.

To be higher up the food chain
Is where I'd love to be,
But to be a shark, or a huge blue whale
Was not my destiny.

So my life is what it is,
I am just what I am.
But it's no fun at the bottom,
It's no fun being a clam.






Entry for
Personification poem of a pet, wild animal or insect Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
2/9/18. Placed 6th.

Written by Line Gauthier
Categories: funny, grandparents, longing, lust, night, nostalgia,

Impure Thoughts

On her nightdress candlelight flickers
While underneath she wears blue knickers
Grandpa recalls Kentucky
The last time he got lucky
Grandma just rolls her eyes and snickers



AP: 3rd place 2025, Honorable Mention 2025

Written by Joe Dimino
Categories: baptism, dark, depression, humorous, introspection, longing

A Bad Day All Around

I determined to take seize
of a lightning bolt! Paused
at every tree.  Flashed and
thundered all about – stood
by every metal post, just 
to see if God wanted me. 
Went to the nearest church…
prayed for a voice or sign: 
and from behind the altar
heard a gulping sound, 
pastor draining the sacrament
wine.  Not a good day.


Written by Gary Smith
Categories: fish, humorous, longing, sea,

Oh To Be a Fish

I'm clinging to a rock,
Being battered by the waves.
At the mercy of the sea,
Living long and tedious days.

No escape for me,
Life's a constant tussle
Relentlessly being pounded,
It's not easy being a mussel.

Stuck here on this rock
Filtering away all day.
Nothing to eat but plankton,
I wish I could swim away.

Oh, to be a fish
And cruise the open sea,
I may be shackled to my rock,
But I dream of being free.

Written by Ryan Tyler
Categories: fantasy, fun, humorous, imagination, longing, science

Sci-Fi Fantasy

Sci-fi fantasy, please come hence to me.
Show me wonder,  space opera blunder.
Show the Galaxy, the worlds I must see.
A droid, a spaceship, through the stars I'll skip.
A rebel scout, to hear a wookie shout.
Oh if only! I had my fantasy!
I'd fire my laser. Wield my light saber.
I'd fly at warp speed. No rules would I heed.
I'd be a pirate. I would never quit.
Solo would envy. Faster than him, I'd be.
Even in the matrix, I'd get my kicks.
I'll take dystopian. You just say when.
Oh please! Oh please I beg! Bring forth to me.
My so well deserved, sci-fi fantasy.

-Angel Fatale-

Written by Robert Candler
Categories: addiction, angst, blue, green, humorous, longing

Stoner's Lament

All those wee pot flakes
So carelessly whisked away...
Could use a joint now.

Written by Brian Eatherton
Categories: funny, longing,

Baker Man

She was longing for her creamy donut
To linger long on her tongue,
She squeezed the sides and to her surprise
It squirted all over her bum.

The big Bermondsey baker man
Shook like an oversized oaf
At silly situations of tasty temptations
As he always liked having a loaf.

Written by Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories: death, humor, humorous, life, longing, philosophy

Waiting For An Epiphany

STILL 
NOT NORMAL
AFTER 
ALL THESE YEARS 
WAITING 
FOR AN EPIPHANY
OR DEATH

Written by Jerry Dinzes
Categories: health, humor, longing, love, spiritual,

Reiki Lover - Limerick

She was in search of spiritual transition,
And spent her time in lotus position.
A Reiki Master,
posing as a pastor,
Invited her to missionary position.

****

 This limerick has been dedicated to a mischievous marriage wrecking Reiki Master. What power the Reiki Master yields - such that he need not even touch you, and yet you be touched! 

Written by Rev. Gerald Dillenbeck
Categories: adventure, analogy, betrayal, creation, humor, longing

Cooking Up Stories

Why would I care enough
to open your recipe story?
Why don't I care enough
to pour you in to enrich mine?

I love your wild seasoned willingness,
can't say the same for our salty willfulness
to exchange our sweet belonging
for side-by-side sour longing.
for being karma's relentless instructions
when we could more peacefully
become simple incarnate
co-productions.

Prime cooking together
feeds my soul to yours,
organic compost
sublime breakfast
wild voiced beings
with choices
stir-flying nice.

Freedom from recipe's half-baked inwardness
evolves freedom toward half-fried out hypothesis.

Natural nutrients grow strong values
folding our stories with care.

Written by Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories: fantasy, first love, funny, funny love, longing, love

I Love My Goose

I love my goose
Some people love their wife 
Some people their dog
I hug my pillow
Maybe two

Written by John Shuck
Categories: humorous, longing, love, tribute,

Desire

It's a taken, never a given--
It's spice? Variety ecstasy driven.
One at a time, for me that works best,
Though often I'll think of the last or the next.
One at a time, so get in her line--
You'll be glad that you did, at least for a time.
Smile and relax! Smoke or drink wine--
Then, back to your life until the next time.

Written by Jan Oskar Hansen
Categories: devotion, father, funny, tree, longing, fruit

Fruit Tree

The fruit tree. 

Twilight, soon it will be dark, sparrows are flying back, god knows 
where they have been. A flock meet in my plum tree, there is livid
 arguing, who is going sit where. My tree doesn’t bear crops, yet 
it is a fruit tree, my neighbour says so. I’m a plum tree too grew 
up tall and stylish women flocked around me, I married five times
... and not a bloody plum.  Grey trunk, limp leaves and when dusk
comes no one sits on my twigs; I have to invent stories of plums 
I never had. Fine plums, juicy plums all of them females that never 
matured and left me alone to fend for myself in time of solitude. 
Night, and in my heart there a is longing for the unfeasible.

Written by Gilbert Mapengo-Mwanguku
Categories: absence, desire, fantasy, funny love, longing,

Before I See You

By 
Gilbert 
Mapengo 
Mwanguku

I 
imprignate 
my 
mind 
with 
illusions
weighing 
the 
naked 
reality 
of 
imaginations
sipping 
sweet 
spirits 
into 
my 
veins
before 
I 
choke 
in 
this 
black 
smoke
before 
I 
throw 
my 
heart 
in 
a 
burning 
cage
before 
I 
unveil 
the 
true 
colours 
of 
a 
hungry 
lion
do 
not 
let 
me 
fall 
in 
abyss 
of 
stress
leave 
me 
with 
one 
precious 
word 
in 
my 
vocabulary
one 
word 
to 
sail 
me 
through,to 
the 
very 
end
one 
word 
indeed, 
LOVE

Written by Veronica Capo
Categories: how i feel, humor, i love you, longing, love, love hurts

The Long Distance Dilemma

Long the distance existing between us, 
making things a little complicated, 
leaving confusion and a slight mistrust. 
And yet we both are still quite unsated. 

Thoughts are not too clear when speaking to you, 
making stupidity quite evident, 
leaving me seem worthless: annoying too. 
And yet you stay, listening to me vent. 

You make fun, picking on me constantly. 
Making me smile and laugh, you're such a goof. 
But when you joke about leaving, you see, 
I'm stuck with a fear of you gone, just poof. 

I want to be with you, if only i could. 
I love you, more than i probably should.

Written by Andrew Baffi
Categories: dream, feelings, funny love, longing, love, pain

Did You Ever Have a Dream

Did you ever have a dream…
And someone who you least expected to see was in it…
And in the dream you fell in love with them…
And when you woke up you realized it was only a dream…
But it still hurt really bad!? 

No, that never happened to me either…

Written by Rangarajan Gopal
Categories: absence, anger, funny love, longing,

Looking Back

Looking Back..

True! It happened
At the very first
sight,
Heart to heart
Eye to eye
Ear to ear
Cheek to cheek
Lip to lip
Joy defined...

But now,
Out of sight
Hurt to hurt
Eye for an eye
Ear for swear
Cheeky, more
Cheeky
Lips slip
Joy trampled!

Written by Patricia Leduc
Categories: angst, cute love, funny love, longing, love,

I Wished

I Wished

I wished on a shooting star
I wished on the first star I saw in the night
I wished on an eyelash to find a true love
I wished on the candles on my birthday cake
I wished on the penny I threw in the well
I wished on a wishbone breaking it in two
I wished on a dandelion blowing seeds into the air
I wished on a ladybug to grant me good luck
I wished our love would come true
I wished you knew of my love for you
 
I wished that I knew… you were wishing for me too

I wished
I wished
I wished

I wished until there were no wishes left 

(Damn! Where’s that Genie when you need him?)

Written by Rio Jansen
Categories: boat, fish, fishing, humor, longing, vacation

I wanna go back to Michigan

I wanna go back to Michigan
so I catch me some really good fish again.
The fish from any other U.S. lake
tend to give me such a bellyache,
that I can't wait to have a Michigan fish on my dish again.

Written by Cheryl Hoffman
Categories: humor, longing, sick,

Honeymoon Hanky Panky

Ah-choo!
Bless you!

Hanky?
Thank ye,

Got cold?
Blow nose...

Feel hot,
To trot!

Drug store,
Buy more!

Return,
Discern,

Took swill,
Nyquill,

Hanky
Panky?

Health crap,
Strength sap!

Hear snore,
Night bore,

Long sleep,
No reap,

No luck,
Gave up,

Frankly,
cranky,

Cold dour…
Shower.



1-28-17

Written by Valerie Axford
Categories: funny, love, longing,

Intrigue - the Art of Revenge

Ingenious deception
Nothing revealed at conception
Tormenting his longing soul
Revenge for the one he stole
Implicating a connection
Genuine heartfelt affection
Until the truth he does receive
Entangled lies will decieve

Written by Susan Buchel
Categories: food, funny, longing,

Always Been Crazy

Always been crazy, dizzy even, for gumdrops, hankering iced jellyrolls. Keen longing makes nougat outlandishly pleasing. Quick! Relish stimulating temptation until vigorous willpower Xs yummy's zaniness.
Wrote this ABC..... poem for the recent contest, but by the time I got there, the contest was gone, dang! Hope you enjoy it anyway... I sure did enjoy writing it!

Written by Andrew Crisci
Categories: children, hilarious, imagination, longing, march, rain

Wrathful March Disappoints Everyone

I expected a day of sunshine,
sit outside and sip some wine;
February gave us some warm days,
we thought spring wouldn't have come for a while...
the bakery below has the scent of bread that delights,
the laundry next door smells like waving clothes on lines!


Wrathful March disappoints everyone, it's a month so insane; 
the saddened kids wanted tons of fluffy snow, not rain or hail;
the snowman's nose would have had a carrot dropped by a quail,
two big blueberries for his small eyes soon to be eaten by ravens,
two small slices of red watermelon for his frozen and pinkish lips...
hooray! they'd have been ready to pull him down the steep lane!