Humorous and funny Names poems and/or funny poems about Names. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Names funny poems!
Written by
Jim Healey
Categories:
humor,
Better Names for an Octopus
A better name for an octopus?
It's tough to make stuff up.
We could start with a brand-new appellation.
How about a name like "Suction Pup"?!
Or perhaps we could start the debate
with a numerical tag like "Ocean's Eight".
Another name open for discussion
would be a handle like "Squid's Cousin".
Still another, somewhat grandiloquent,
could be the rather pompous "Inknificent".
My Scottish friends, with joy, will weep
if the new label is "Bagpipes of the Deep"!
Or one can almost hear sailors shout "Ahoy!
Is that a rock? No, it's an Ol' Tangly Boy!"
Written by
Rob Carmack
Categories:
funny, girlfriend, humorous, loss, love, memory, relationship,
Names
Every past that perfectly colors letters,
haunting losses beckon the predecessors,
utter names in passion or greeting, makes a
furious girlfriend.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Written: 01.16.19
Written by
Jason Williams
Categories:
boyfriend, cute love, for him, funny love, love, word play,
His Other Names
His Other Names
by Jason Williams
Although he has a proper name,
and his friends acknowledge but one,
I rarely call him the same because
to me, he has a great sum!
He is often . . .
. . . my Baby.
. . . my Boo.
. . . my Baby Boo.
. . . my Sweetie.
. . . my Sweet Baby Boo.
. . . my Sweet Pea.
. . . my Sugarlump.
. . . my Butter Bean.
. . . my Pumpkin.
. . . my Pookie.
. . . my Snugglemuffin.
. . . my Love.
Written by
Sidney Beck
Categories:
humor, introspection,
Military Names
MILITARY NAMES
Names are chosen to suggest aggression;
Anything smacking of peace is for suppression.
Soviet subs are Typhoons not Seabreezes.
The USAF flies Eagles, not Robins
And it’s a Tomcat, not a Tabby cat,
Real men fly a Hornet not a Butterfly.
The British prefer Harrier to Supporter.
Native American names can include
The Tomahawk but not the Prayer Bead,
And the Apache but not the Micmac.
No doubt a new aircraft carrier
Could be called the Charles Bronson
But not called the Oscar Wilde.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous,
Pleasseeee Dont Call Them Stupid Names
Celebrities cause quite a stir and give their child a silly name
They think they are so clever but should hang their heads in shame
Kanye and Kim named their first child North West
When I heard the poor mite’s name I thought it was in jest
If they achieve all 32 compass points in every direction
Poor Kanye will be so shattered and not get an ********
Gywneth and Chris’s child is called Apple did you know
Shame they have now split up or a fruit salad they could sow
If Apple gets teased she will hate it and it may give her strife
Wish parents would remember a child’s name is with them for life
Jan Allison
23rd May 2014
Written by
Doris Lee
Categories:
cowboy-western, depression, fantasy, funny, health, hope,
Names
everyone has one.they can be old names.they can be different names.they
can be celebrity names.they can be silly names!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Written by
Vladimir Tumanov
Categories:
daughter, father daughter, father son, humor, humorous, men, son,
Unfair Names
I’ve been called an inequity spotter
(although some will just call me a “rotter”).
Names are biased for sons:
yours and mine — everyone’s.
I propose to make JohnSON — JohnDAUGHTER.
Written by
Melani Udaeta
Categories:
culture, humor,
Unfortunate Last Names
It could be Frog or maybe Stoner,
first one’s Richard last is *****;
Parents play such twisted games,
such unfortunate last names;
Having just one? So much better.
Written by
Michael Kalavik
Categories:
allegory, humor,
Naming Names
If you hailed from South Dakota,
And someone asked you, "Where you from?"
You wouldn’t simply say, “Uh, Dakota.”
And if you grew up in the hills of West Virginia,
You’d never be inclined to just reply, “Oh, I’m from Virginia.”
But if your mind is going to Carolina,
And you knew James Taylor’s home address,
It doesn’t matter whether North or South,
You’ll navigate your way by GPS.
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
hilarious,
Hilarious Town Names
Believe it or not these are actual
town names in the U.S.A. and Canada
BOOGER HOLE West Virginia
CROTCH LAKE Ontario
KNOCK EM STIFF Ohio
INTERCOURSE Pennsylvania
PEE PEE CREEK Ohio
SCRATCH ANKLE Alabama
CRAPAUD Prince Edward Island
TWO EGGS Florida
WHY NOT North Carolina
STINKY POO Alabama
SNAFU Alaska
ANUS Indiana
DDILDO Newfoundland
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
hilarious,
Wacky Names
Here are some wacky names, my doctor is Liam Crummy
Barb Dwyer, Seymour Legg, Stan Still, and Terri Bull, really funny
If you want more here's others to avail
Ima Kettle, Dan Druff, Rusty Nails
Can't imagine what their parents called their puppy
Written by
Alkas Poetry
Categories:
allusion, analogy, appreciation, creation, discrimination, humor, satire,
Weird Names We Call To Ourselves
There are so many grotesque allusions on us
that we lost ourselves in identity ... let's examine.
The list,,,
Leg Canes,
elephant calves,
belly that is tripe
mud trough,
plank foot,
mouth of pocket,
flapping ear,
lynx eye,
goat eye,
horse teeth,
dog face,
seal mustache,
fire hair,
cockroach blood,
puffing mosquito,
chicken stick
beard beard,
monkey brain,
catfish head,
pigeon breast,
steel nerves
Coco Horse,
monkey brain,
pig snout,
pig spirit ...
horse face, .. and a number of ...
There are so many orders that impose us
that we don't even resemble people .. if we collect
everything, we will be uglier than Frankenstein ...
Written by
Elton Camp
Categories:
humor, universe,
Pompous Names For Beauty Pageants
Grandiose Names for Beauty Pageants
By Elton Camp
“Miss America” is a reasonable name
Even “Miss World” is about the same
However, the name “Miss Universe”
Could be making some aliens curse
In the universe with all of that room
Humans live alone may we assume?
Into the judges minds has it entered
That all beauty isn’t human centered?
Antennae and faceted bug eyes
To some, beauty might comprise
In other races, skin that’s green
Is the most beautiful ever seen
What if along comes a female ET
And says to them, “Enter me!”
Only if she’s treated just the same
Can they claim that pompous name
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
humor,
How did you get their names so wrong
Thor did not live up to his name
He was skinny, weak a petite Fontaine
Wren, his brother was a Herculean guy
Brawny and strapping, he caught many an eye
How did you get their names so wrong?
I asked their mother, Mrs. Wong.
Thor weighed ten at birth, Wren weighed three.
A cruel joke God played on me.