Humorous and funny Ocean poems and/or funny poems about Ocean. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Ocean funny poems!
Written by
Michael Wise
Categories:
boat, humorous, ocean,
The Lark In the Dark
Sammy went out on a lark
sailing his boat in the dark
and while he got drunk
his little boat sunk
so his hangover went to the shark
Written by
Gregory Richard Barden
Categories:
adventure, funny, humorous, light, ocean, sea
What He Gets For Empty Nets
The old fisherman sat in his dory
Empty nets, but concocting a story
It would sure mean his life
Should he greet his young wife
At the dock without financial quarry.
Now his wife was as fit as could be
With the girth and the might of a tree
He considered her ire
Then began to perspire
And headed his boat ... out to sea.
~ 3rd Place ~ in the "Tax & Finance Limericks - Old or New" Poetry Contest, Carolyn Devonshire, Judge & Sponsor.
Written by
Kristie Raburn
Categories:
adventure, humorous, ocean,
In the Sea
If I’d been born a whale
No happier could I be
Swimming, splashing, spy hopping
Roaming the open sea
If I’d been born a lobster
No happier could I be
Crawling along the ocean floor
Living in the sea
If I’d been born a seahorse
No happier could I be
Swimming among the rocks and plants
At the bottom of the sea
But I was born a human and
No happier could I be
Because I can swim in the ocean
And see what’s in the sea
Written by
Kim Mcadam
Categories:
beach, children, humor, simile,
Ocean Waves
ocean waves rush in
like rambunctious preschoolers
at morning recess
eager to entertain you
in goofy games of pretend
Written by
Eve Roper
Categories:
bird, humor, ocean, woman,
Seagulls Take Flight
Seagulls Take Flight
Rose strolled alone on a warm sandy beach
as salty sea foamy waves crept to reach
net her toes as the wind rose
She Jump from getting wet toes
instead fell back on her butt with a screech
Beach bumming seagulls came flying around
while Rose sat embarrassed on the wet ground
Plop! Whitewash flopped on her head
then up to the air they fled
flapping, squawking, with snapping hungry sounds
4/27/2017
Written by
Cindi Rockwell
Categories:
fishing, funny, myth, ocean, sea,
Catch of the Day
A merman once jumped o’er my rail,
And we shared four gallons of ale!
I don’t kiss and tell
But my panties fell
And that was my best piece of tail!
July 31, 2018
Written by
Gorlum Gorlum
Categories:
beach, desire, humor, lust, ocean, old
Dirty Limerick: Old Man,Part 2
Preparing his conference speech
Old man ended up on nude beach
By virtue or vise
He stuck his device
In each blowhole he could reach
Written by
Larry Belt
Categories:
funny
Ocean Trash
Lawyers want money to buy a new suit
Thieves with a rolex and evil to boot
They're as crooked as can be
They all need buried at sea
That's where they'd be but I just don't pollute
Written by
Moonbee Canady
Categories:
fish, fun, humor, humorous, nature, ocean
About Whales In a Fish Story -Corny-
" O' Whale ... A Fish Story ... "
The Biggest, Exclamatory Interjection, Used In The Ocean
The Phrase That Holds Many A Gigantic Wave's Commotion
It's Often Spoken In: Hurricanes, Monsoons or Tsunamis
But Its Not: Oh My! Look Out! or See! or Ooou-Weee!
It's " Well! " - Says Every Little Fish of The Sea ...
(Just Ask: Finding Nemo - he he he)
Written & Copyrighted ©: 9/18/2013
by: MoonBee Canady
Written by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories:
fantasy, fish, funny, hero, ocean, science fiction
Aquaman
He talks to the fish
And they hear his every wish
He swims in their pee
Way out in the sea.
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
environment, evil, fish, humor, immigration, ocean
A Mermaid's Tale
Trump's newly-appointed EPA Chief
Found himself buried in EPA grief
To prove he was no party-pooper
He likened Trump to a Giant Grouper
Swimming against an almighty current
Where even the sharks were no deterrent
"Forget the 'U' and immigrant no-hoper!
I'll rename that fish, "The Slippery Groper"!
Well, Congress agreed to just let it pass
That's God's honest truth, you bet your wrasse!
Written by
Gry Christensen
Categories:
boat, desire, funny, heart, humor, ocean
The Anchor
I once loved
an anchor
one of those
that sails
on skin
one of those
that has
a rowing heart
and pelting blood
within
One of those
who blows
mussel covered
kisses
one of those
that tells
mermaids salty lies
one of those
who'll
go down with
rum and shackles
the day he finally
dies.
© Gry W Christensen
Written by
Chole Young
Categories:
death, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, imagination, satire, seaocean
Pacific Ocean
i wish i could swim the pacific ocean and back.
and when i came back to sit in front of a burning burning fire
until it dried me to the bone.
and for my skeleton to be hung above your bed
to act as a catcher of your night terrors
and it would work
because you would know that i was magical.
because i swam the whole pacific ocean and back.
for you.
Written by
Gail Lewis
Categories:
adventure, analogy, animal, funny, ocean,
Ollie the Octopus
Ollie the Octopus with his 9 brains
Broke his 3 hearts in a quick poker game
The blue blood that ran straight to his heart
Suddenly stopped before it could start
It didn't take long before he withered and died
And Ollie the octopus waved us goodbye
Written by
George Aul
Categories:
humor, ocean,
Love Tune
I grew this big thing to impress the gals
I knew that it would get back to my pals,
saw the jealousy coming
but I just keep on humming...
finding Narwhal love in many locales.
For "Impress me with a NARWHAL poem" by SKAT A
Written by
Clive Culverhouse
Categories:
animal, fish, fun, humorous, nonsense, ocean
See See Under The Sea
the seahorses grazed in a field undersea
the jellyfish wobbled at the party
the starfish in their constellations went
the clams secretive tight lipped and silent
the hammerhead sharks did the DIY
the clown fish entertained as they swam by
the plankton ruled undersea in their gangs
the octopuses spent too long shaking hands
the crabs on the side their day they spent
the lobsters approached in a pincer movement
the sea urchins loitered dishevelled and poor
while the oysters enjoyed everything and all
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
beach, bullying, fish, humor, humorous, ocean
little surfer
once a surfer named ava
annoyed fish with each wava
a whale came around
and knocked her aground
a lesson in behava.
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
africa, food, funny, tiger,
Chuck Your Manners In the Ocean
Pardon me, Excuse me, I'm sorry
Don't say these words on a safari
Lions will eat you
A tiger will too
Real soon you'll look like calamari
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
beach, fish, funny, humor, humorous, ocean
shock wave
local cab driver big deal
lacking personal appeal
drives into a lake
procures a fish cake
then bumps an electric eel.
Written by
Carl Dunford
Categories:
dedication, friendship, funny, ocean,
If I Could.
I would climb the highest mountain,for you
if you asked me to.
I would swim the ocean for you,
if only I could.
That sounds all well and good,
there is some thing I have not told you.
A mountain I can not climb,
I hate looking down,
an ocean I can not swim,
water is definitely not my thing.
I would build a house for you but
I can not promise it will stand,
when it comes to do it yourself
I have two left hands.
How about I sing for you
not a good idea,
my voice is so high
I could shatter your glass from here.
There must be some thing I can do
to show how I feel about you.
I will dedicate this poem to you,
now that is some thing I can do.
Written by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories:
boat, funny, humorous, ocean, sea, sick
My Rare Disorder
I have a rare disorder that causes me to see everyone in the cast of any submarine movie as Don Rickles. Every bloody person is Don Rickles. Once saw a submarine movie wherein a woman was saved from a sinking ship and the captain on the submarine made love to her and they both were Don Rickles.
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
humor, joy, ocean, silly, summer, travel
sea dog
old duke a seafaring dog
drifted about on a log
till in a harbor
next to an arbor
found him a seed catalog.
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, bird, fun, funny, humor, ocean
Pelican Pete
A pelican called Pete,
Whom tuna, would not eat;
Flew down to hot sand,
Some sand crabs to land,
Now Pete has some very blistered feet!
Written by
Hugo Sarvida Jr.
Categories:
fishing, humor, nature, perspective,
Fisherman In Pacific Ocean
Sunrise all the world
But sunrise over the sea
Brings unique surprise.
Written by
Joe Dimino
Categories:
earth, environment, humorous, ocean, political, pollution
Wind Power
Wind Power, Progressive
flatulence -- no more whale' tales
from shore to shore –
Poor ocean dears
needing new steers,
bumping their heads
in our dark –
“Old lamps for new”
your lantern for my
cute, feel-good spark...
bumping their
heads in our dark....
bumping their
heads in our dark....