Funny Poems About Paradise or Paradise Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Paradise poems and/or funny poems about Paradise. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Paradise funny poems!

Written by Martin Kloess
Categories: funny, humor, paradise, sea,

Another Sailor's Tail Tale

They paddled till we reached the shore
Where I set them free to explore
Then back to the sea
This sailor did flee
They’ll not paddle me anymore

Written by Volodymyr Knyr
Categories: age, bible, eve, humorous, paradise, woman

Eve

Only Eve is a madam, 
who is known from Adam.

Volodymyr Knyr
2014


Written by Joyce Johnson
Categories: funny

Limerick In Paradise

If I were a fly on their wall. 
And heard about Adam’s big fall.
I’d say “God please try me.
I’ll do better than he
If I weren’t so unfairly small”.




For Michael's Fly on the Wall limerick contest  won # 4

Written by Gershon Wolf
Categories: giggle, paradise, peace, planet, satire, sky

Do You See What I See

'When Jupiter aligns with Mars'
  all I see are tiny stars
'When the moon is in the Seventh House'
  I am in my wife's doghouse

'Harmony and understanding'
  My car, my kids be demanding
'Golden living dreams of visions'
  What I wear evokes derision

They call this 'The Age of Aquarius'
  ~ I taste turmeric on asparagus



___________________________________
Lines 1, 3, 5, and 7 are taken from 'The Age
of Aquarius,' a hit song released by 'The 
Fifth Dimension' in 1969.

Written by Robin Davis
Categories: funny, vacation,

Problems In Paradise

A vacation on an island
Had me all shook up and cryin'
I was supposed to surf on top
Of waves but all I did was plop
On my front side really hard
Leaving it all red and scarred
Now I can't wear my bikini
Waves of terror were a meanie
My nice figure is now covered
As I lay on the beach hovered
By hot sun making me sweat
I can not even get wet
Because I look like an apple slice
Half of me red, the other white


Written by Deb Wilson
Categories: funny, husband, wife,

Trouble In Paradise

I once knew a man from the city
Whose girlfriends were all very pretty
He did live a charmed life
Till found out by his wife
Where she kicked him at was a pity!

Written by James Horn
Categories: humorous,

Either Heaven Or Paradise

Is heaven same place they call paradise?
Whatever you want always will suffice
While angels fly around and soon scatter
Saw me raising hell releasing my bladder.

James Thomas Horn
Retired Veteran

Written by Ingrid Showalter Swift
Categories: anger, food, hilarious, paradise,

Hell At the Paradise Pizza Shoppe

All hell broke loose,  when Jerry ran into John at the Paradise Pizza Shoppe

Written by Panagiota Romios
Categories: humorous, paradise, places,

Saturday Crowds



    Why go nuts in a Saturday crunch?
    Many stores now open 24/7, you see?
    Packed stores, like monkeys on tall trees.
    Me, home with tea and a zesty lunch.



    August 10, 2019
    10:30am PST




NOTICE: this was listed originally as a limerick. A kind poet said it was not.
I had used another source that indicated a limerick could be four lines only. 
I don't know anymore. So changing it to a rhyme. If you know about four  
line limerick, .please Soupmail, me? Thanks.

Written by Gershon Wolf
Categories: animal, giggle, smile,

A Vision of Paradise

       Of all the things upon this earth
          I’d never want to be a horse
       ‘Cos first of all, how DO they sleep
          when standing on their hooves, of course

        Another creature I would shun
           is lazy, smelly, weighs a ton
        Flies buzz an inch from her dull eyes
           You guessed a cow? ~ ‘twas no surprise

        And finally, to top things off
           I never want to be a chimp
         I need respect, I’m not a clown
           na-NA, na-NA, na-NA na-Na
           
         So, if you smile when I sit down ~
           I’ll turn my wrong end upside down



                ~ Iambic Tetrameter ~

Written by Gerald Dillenbeck
Categories: health, humor, integrity, passion, psychological, senses

Paradise Connections

The pursuit of erotic
exotic climaxing paradise
is not neurotic
about biological perfection

And almost entirely resilient
and resonant impressions
through sensory neurological connections:

Feeling touch
Smelling taste
Sighting sound
******** directions,
cooperative indiscretions.

Written by Gershon Wolf
Categories: bird, food, giggle,

Parakeet's Paradise

Ketchup and mustard blanket the meat
     Tho' the onions and garlic don't smell very sweet

   Mayo and lettuce produce a civilized tweak      
     for the worm sandwich I feed my pet parakeet

Written by Aniruddha Pathak
Categories: humor, paradise, passion,

Resetting privacy settings

The human history unfolding,
Adam eyed an apple so tempting,
He asked innocent Eve
A helping hand to give--
Let’s reset our privacy setting.
_________________________  
Tongue-in-cheek |08.09.2024| Humour

Poet’s note:  Adam and Eve were enjoying their bliss of innocence in Eden Garden, and Adam eyed an apple. We all know what happened. That was the first time Adam and Eve changed their privacy settings. The first was the fig leaf and found far too brief. Today, what with internet hackers and crooks all around, changing privacy settings has become common.    


Written by Abdul Malik
Categories: humor,

Fool's Paradise

It is easy to dwell in happy places,

When two wise men meet—
	They wrangle contentedly
	over the ways of the world;
When two fools huddle together—
	They concur on almost everything. 



~Contest: Bitesize Poem#54
~Sponsor: Line Gauthier.

Written by Josh Hicks
Categories: confidence, crazy, freedom, fun, funny, paradise

My Balls

My balls smell like a crisp morning in the alpine suck them and you'll feel fine perhaps enjoying it more after we have a bottle of wine and dine
They're smooth as eggs and they shine just made that way by god's design
Once they're whipped out it's impossible to decline you'll be drooling at the mouth saying "they're mine" as you feel an excited tingling sensation down your spine