Humorous and funny Poems poems and/or funny poems about Poems. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Poems funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Poems Poems.
Black Eyed Susan
funny, humorous, journey, poems,
I thought I could wow them with poems from earth
Poems of joy and humor, poems extolling it’s worth
So I laid out poems from Michael, Gail, and me
From Andrea, David, Gwen, and Ilene
From PD, Harry, Mandy, and Chris
From Jack, Craig, Cyndi, and Liz…
For I was sure once they read our beautiful works
They would embrace us and love our humanly quirks!
So last night I taped them all over my skin
Knowing they’d find them if they took me again…
When I woke up, they were gone and I had a reply:
“We enjoyed reading those poems last night,
And thanks for the names of the earthlings too -
We have many more experiments to do!”
For Michael's boomerang...send your poem for a ride contest
fun, funny, humor, humorous, poems, poetry,
This poem is awful.
Its flow is ever so clumsy,
and its rhyme is not to be endorsed,
because it’s forced.
Like a bomb factory, it is full of bad devices:
average alliteration, similes like farts in an elevator,
and badly executed and slightly unnecessary...
enjambment. Plus it seems to be missing its
Contest: You Be The Judge
Sponsored by: Bobby May
Date Created: 8th March 2019
Your Judgment Rating: Last
humorous, poems, sexy,
Dirty old man
In the mood …
She's feelin hot hot hot
fancy a quickie?
We should have seen the signs
What can go wrong when wearing a thong
Long and hard
What a whopper
moan moan moan
Hold on darling - I'm coming
This time YOU didn’t come second
Tell me why!
I was finding titles for Laura Loo’s contest and these are all original titles from some of my old poems…. I do worry about my muse!!
how i feel, humor, irony, poems, poetry, truth, writing,
I feel that I've not done,
Everything that I should do.
I've not found the sun,
Nor what rain,
May have to prove.
Every word is dry,
With a fighting attitude,
Trying to deny,
What I'd truly say to you.
I've tried to be the kind,
And please your very eyes.
Yet there comes a time,
When my muse,
Runs and hides.
Nay! This game of pain,
Is not what I ordain.
Peace will be sustained,
On the day,
I write again.
Slight twitching of the toes
A shudder of the shins
The knocking of the knees
Is where it all begins
Vibration of the thighs
Through years of cellulite
Swinging of the hips
As it makes it's little trip
Grumbling of the belly
Way deep down inside
Till it moves up to the chest
To the thump of the hearts delight
Shoots straight to the brain
Where it bounces back and forth
Throughout the cracks and crevices
Till it feels it's run its course
Drops down to a lump in the throat
Giving way to speech
Spilling forth for all it's worth
In waves of poetry
fun, funny, humor, humorous, poems, poetry, poets,
Poems are selfies for brains,
Parading our joys and our pains,
We’re not sharing faces,
But much deeper places -
We’re hanging our souls out for praise!
We type them up, post them on Soup,
Keep our phones on to stay in the loop,
When an email comes in,
bringing love, it’s a win!
Our endorphins go whoop-whoop-dee-whoop!
We’re just like the Instagram lot,
Preened and pouting to show what they’ve got,
“But hang on, this is art!
We’re not vain - we’re just smart!”
Yeah - you’re right of course. I’m talking rot.
In a pitch dark room
Do you use your shin bone?
A diamond gift
Could they be the same thing?
Look now and see
Really ugly sheep
Where virgin wool comes from?
M. L. Kiser
animal, fun, funny, nature, poems, poetry,
There’s a goat on my roof and he won’t come down;
there’s a goat on my roof, acting like a clown.
That clip-clop of hooves, what obnoxious noise;
though it’s amazing, his level of poise.
What drew him there, I do not know,
there wasn’t any food or foe.
Just walking around, he thinks he’s hot,
I had to tell him, he is not.
He’s munching my oak, from the roof top;
I’ve yelled till I’m hoarse, to get him to stop.
My neighbor says, a goat is good Feng Shui;
so, I suppose I will just let him stay.
M. L. Kiser
animal, cat, humor, pets, poems, poetry,
Ah, sweet slumber of nip-laden dreams;
the milk of mother moon bestowed,
a blessed drink and lactose-free
to this mine humble, feline throat.
Running freely through outer space,
I touch upon thy blessed universe.
My home of emerald and lapis lace,
is where in I lay in furred repose.
Chasing neon rainbows in nebulae bright,
my dreams are filled with gold doubloons.
I’ll spend them on treats and nip-delight,
and chase away any greedy tycoons.
A feline black as obsidian night,
in a home filled with human love;
among the faeries and tree sprites,
mind flies just like the doves.
humorous, irony, poems, poetess, poetry, poets, voice,
Feelings on paper
A melody on parchment
your heartfelt humor
delighting unknown strangers
while you ignore him
pouring out your soul
into a painting or poem
husband catches up
confusion, humor, poems, poetry, silly,
Since I've been on Poetrysoup
I admit I was taken back
By how many types of poetry
My education seems to lack
Could I make my rhyme a sixette
Or would I be 3 short
If I charged for a freeverse
Would I be forced to abort
How much must I remove
to make my hexaverse diminished
and then do I need more words
before I can be finished
Can I let my Rondeau Redouble
Without too much trouble at first
And must I be affiliated
To attempt a political verse
I guess I'll learn them one at a time
Until then I'll just call them a rhyme
M. L. Kiser
animal, cat, funny, nature, pets, poems, poetry,
My toilet paper
out of the bathroom,
throughout the whole house,
no, it is not trained.
If it were trained
I am certain
it would proudly
stay nice and neat.
My cat walks
M. L. Kiser
celebration, christmas, fun, humor, pets, poems, poetry,
Merry Christmas to you all,
we’re having such a great snowfall?
These tasty stars, a delicious treat,
we hope your Holiday Meal is great!
For this card we’ve donned our best,
felt antlers ever so, neatly pressed.
These snow-stars are falling with such glee,
filling up branches on the trees.
We hope that Santa brings you all,
the best'est presents, a real haul.
Stay warm and cozy, don’t catch cold,
your warmest blankets, do unfold.
For your New Year, we wish the best,
better than any of the rest.
Blessed blessings to you be,
upon this wondrous, Christmas Eve!
1. A gnat under blue
days will next spin on apples
Look! More frogs arrived
2. The terrible tree
Covers my house. That summer
I counted wagons
3. The frog above red
Songs will soon remember you
Winter dreams with ducks
children, games, hockey, humorous, men, poems, sports,
They both wear black and white,
Sport’s fans will see some tonight,
As one type skates on frozen water,
The other keeps a herd in order.
The man can get caught up in media hype,
Each has the same angle of stripe,
Only one has them down to the toes,
And tries to out run the foes.
Seeing far away is their asset,
Always watching out for a threat,
While the other kind may need to hide,
Making some calls they seem crossed-eyed.
A zebra is born looking like this,
All the while, hoping their enemy will miss,
Linesmen and refs are known to make a bad call,
In the end, it could be a team’s down fall.
candy, change, desire, food, kids, funny, house, husband, imagination, mystery, poems, senses, sweet,
The taste of homemade Carmel so sweet/ everyone I know desires the treat.
After one night in the kitchen covered/ half the pan gone, next morning discovered.
Is it my beagle Lily whom loves any food? / she seems in a hyper beagle mood.
I know I heard a squeak in the night / a dream ? No, for low was the kitchen light.
T'was my husband, for he can't resist/ soft , buttered brown sugar , a Vanilla twist.
beautiful, feelings, fun, funny, life, poetry,
it is nice to write happy poems
that make the sky
and everything around me
and everything around me
much much lighter
confusion, humor, poems, stress, writing,
Sick, sick, sick
I must be sick,
subjecting myself to
this level of frustration.
Hours of work at
this monster they
call a computer -
type, edit, cut, paste ,
thoughts aside in italics,
line breaks scrutinized.
This needs changing,
take that line out,
add this pithy phrase
Finally, it's as near
perfect as I can make it,
lean back and sigh,
admire the finished draft.
Just space the whole thing
a tad to the right.
NO! NO! Quick
as a lightning flash,
blank page appears.
where is it?
Can't get it back -
character, community, emotions, funny, people, poems, remember, world,
Sitting on the soft cushion seat
Start of turtle movement
The advert on the bus
Is the only catchy appeal
The drumming of the engine
The grunting of the taxi
Dusk getting crisp
Dull glow of the sun
The glance at the sky
With a wish to fly
The buttocks begin to get sore
I see my finger nails
Then back to the next lane
I feel my eyes burn
A long ribbon of taillights flashing
The next lane is fast moving
Taxi driver snoring
The turtle movement
Glazing outside the window
Another turtle movement
Nerves rest - feet asleep
With an effort
Feet wake up
Anxiety rising - start to walk
Jon A Cavanaugh
Pathetic poems are parodies
Chopped and severed from mad trees
Which escape from limb and trunk
Then appear in books as junk
Transplanted in the minds they've fried
Transplanted till their poets have died
Echo in "ruinic" rhyme
That degrade through passing time
Written down as so much clutter
They find their way into the gutter
How hilarious these poems can be
Poems also known as parody
ruinic - a fictitious word derived from runic as obscure and ruin as degraded
- a degraded and obscure rhyme
humorous, poems, poetry, poets,
I once knew a poet named “Susan”
Who first found PS quite confusin’
Learn forms she was told
Free verse overload
Blogs, contest N/A not amusin’
For Sensitive Community 'a pd contest'
boyfriend, care, dedication, devotion, faith, first love, for her, for him, gender, girlfriend, happiness, happy, heart, heaven, home, house, how i feel, humor, husband, i love you, imagination, inspiration, inspirational, kiss, longing, love, marriage, miss you, missing, poems, poetry, romance, romantic, together, words,
When I hear your name
My heart beats faster than usual
It's not that I am ashame
But It's just your name is too special..
Can't control the feelings
When I am with you
Can't stop smiling
When you hold me like you do
When you hug me then
I feel like I'm in heaven
You are a blessing from above
And you are the reason why I loved
I'll promise to love you FOREVERMORE..
And I will cherish you until the end of my borrowed life
And I will keep our precious memories as long as
we see each other in our next life..
Poems for Children Only
If poem seems bad straighten it out for me
So maybe soon eventually I can start to see
What I thought were to be my eccentricities
Compared to yours were all inadequacies.
Many of my verbs may be in wrong tense
Word arrangement never made much sense
Some adverbs should be adjectives instead
And ending of my people often did dread.
Okay, my comrade poets I must confess
What should I do to straighten out this mess?
Start trying to tear all of my poems apart;
Write poems for children only soon do start.
James Thomas Horn, Retired Veteran
NOT CONTEST BOUND
I used to know a poet named Lin Lane
she often walked in the thundering rain
one day she got a jolt
from a fierce lightning bolt
and now all of her poems are insane
food, fruit, health, humor, missing, poems, sad,
Dear Fruit Fly
I don't like you
I can't stand you
Everywhere I go
You seem to be there
Staring me in my face
waiting for me to turn my back
so you can steal the food from off my plate
but today you really strike a nerve when you snatch my Eggo
That was my blueberry Eggo waffles
You and your compadres have to go
I had a enough
so here is a bus ticket
find somebody else home you can invade
Please fruit fly go away
You have over stayed your welcome