Humorous and funny Prayer poems and/or funny poems about Prayer. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Prayer funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Prayer Poems.
Poem Details | by
Joe Dimino |
Categories:
humorous, imagery, metaphor, nonsense, prayer, voyage, word play,
I like to think
that poetry
has intrinsic value
above and beyond
the actual craft…
That the origins
of poetry’s meter
and rhyme precede
each preliminary
draft…
That something, perhaps
even spiritual, transcends
the fore-and-aft…
And when the writer
thinks to scuttle
a work, as often
inherently we do,
always
may there be angels
floating him
a Literary-raft….
Poem Details | by
Dan Keir |
Categories:
allah, angel, angst, confusion, dream, education, faith, freedom, god, happiness, health, heaven, history, holocaust, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, miracle, nature, on writing and words, pain, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religious, sad, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,
Beauty of nature
Why condense it down to God?
Isn’t life enough?
Poem Details | by
Dan Keir |
Categories:
allah, angel, angst, courage, dream, education, faith, fantasy, fear, funny, god, heaven, history, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, mystery, nostalgia, on work and working, parody, passion, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religion, religious, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,
Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?
Poem Details | by
Mike Dailey |
Categories:
angst, funny, health, nature, religion, satire, wifeme, me,
Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the Lord for no more heat
For if it comes, I’ll be awake
I pray the Lord, don’t make me bake
I’ll even get down on my knees
And pray the Lord “Lord, pretty please”
Please don’t turn my furnace on
My flesh is weak, my patience’s gone
I haven’t had a good night’s sleep
Since menopause turned on the heat
And it’s no good Lord, counting sheep
If into fire, Lord they leap
So Lord, please grant me this request
And take this fire from my chest
Let someone else be thusly blessed
And let me finally get some rest
Short Poem contest - Honorable Mention finish
Mdailey
written for my wife
Poem Details | by
Marvin D. Schrebe |
Categories:
kids, funny, nature, nostalgia, prayer, children, snow, children, snow,
Outside the snow is falling
The children are sleighing
Sometimes they start snowballing
Outside the snow is falling
“Dinner is served”, their Mom is calling
The children don’t hear what she’s saying
Outside the snow is falling
The children are sleighing!
Poem Details | by
Dan Keir |
Categories:
child, funny, humorous, prayer, religious, science, science fiction, space,
Don’t worry now child
There's no god, so worship space
You are not alone.
Poem Details | by
Tony Lane |
Categories:
funny, prayer,
Christmas comes just once a year
And that should be a blessing,
It’s not the birth of Christ I fear,
It’s the shopping that’s so depressing.
They now fire off starting guns,
To start the spending is their goal.
But the news stories that the TV runs,
Report the shopping day’s death toll.
It seems the shoppers who wait up front
In these times of greed,
In order to get the gifts they want
Are willing to make you bleed.
So say a prayer and get out of the way
For it’s civility that we clearly lack,
We used to call this “Shopper’s Friday,”
But you see now why it’s called black.
Poem Details | by
Betty Harp Butler |
Categories:
humorous, prayer, religious, sleep,
I have a secret that is very simple.
I’ll share it with you if I may.
When you can’t sleep,
Don’t count sheep.
Pray...
Pray for those you love,
And those who don’t love you.
Pray for your friends,
And for your enemies too.
Pray for your family-
All of them, not just one or two.
Pray for everyone who is sick, hurting, or lost.
And when you feel you are through,
Pray for you.
Poem Details | by
Chipepo Lwele |
Categories:
forgiveness, funny,
Oh Lord,forgive the arresting officer
who first caught me when I committed crime__
for destroying my future.
Again,I pray to blindfold the inspector of police__
that He may order police officers to delete my
picture and name from the 'wanted persons list'__
Also, make lazy police officers assigned to arrest
me from my hiding place__
Jail changed my life!
chipepo lwele
*Dedicated to hardcore Jailbirds
Poem Details | by
Rudolph Rinaldi |
Categories:
funny, money, prayer, satire,
I am led by desire
I desire this
I desire that
I desire everything
that all my friends’
have and desire
because
someone else has and desires it
God
I know I have no use
for most of it
but I must have it
I desire life
but not death
for the fear of it
I desire life because
most my friends have it and want it
and fear death because
most of my friends fear it
God
when I am dead
maybe I will desire nothing
because all my dead friends
will most likely desire nothing
and hopefully
we will most likely have no use
for any of it
then God
what will become of it?
Poem Details | by
Andrea Dietrich |
Categories:
funny
prey of the day - frog
pleased mantis licks spiny hands. . .
that was delicious
Poem Details | by
Marrissa Kamckey- Harms |
Categories:
funny, happiness, life, prayer,
Every time I take a step,
I end up falling down.
Legs flying throw the air,
Making me look like a clown.
Though if I jump up in the sky,
Holding a simple prayer in my mind.
I fly....
Only to land on my behind!:-)
Poem Details | by
Molly Cooper |
Categories:
funny, people, prayer, me,
Commit to the turn!
Turn, Turn, Turn!!!
I am behind you, see me burn!
If you turn on your blinker
That means your going left or right
The way you drive leaves me in a fright!
Anxious I may be to get on my way
But your driving (or lack there of) is keeping us all at bay
As I take a deep breath and say a prayer for you
I am reminded that I have a grandma too
If you’re old or very young indeed
Here are some instructions for driving day by day
Commit to the turn!
Turn, Turn, Turn!!!
A Poem for Contest “ What Annoys You”
Poem Details | by
Jack Ellison |
Categories:
humorous, prayer, technology,
12 o'clock... 12 o'clock... 12 o'clock!
How do you set this damn clock
Thought of bashing it to bits with a hammer
To get the damn flashing to stop
Always assumed I was quite intelligent
But technology has me bamboozled
Tried reading the manual but that didn't work
To comprehend, from my brain came refusal
My smart *** ten year old nephew happened by
"Not a problem dear uncle, I'll fix it"
Two minutes later, the damn flashing stopped
Felt dorkish and kind of a twit
My fervent prayer which I possess without malice
Is for technology to bury this young geek
In a deluge of bits and bytes and firewalls
Till he no longer can get a good night's sleep!
© Jack Ellison 2012
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
faith, health, humorous, people, prayer, religion, wisdom,
Too often, a simple X-ray
makes militant atheists pray.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
Warner Baxter |
Categories:
blessing, funny, humor, jobs, prayer, satire,
Lord,
We do give thee thanks for the abundance
That is ours in glorious nudity
Even though some of it is saline
And some with silicon
Bless each and every one
~~~
Tell your mind what your body
already knows
~~
Understand this,
They wanna be you, they wanna be just like you
Because right now, you are the sexiest
Woman on God’s green Earth
Amen
?
NOTE: This piece is NOT about ***********, it is a satire, a humorous jab at
the Industry
Please enjoy with this in mind or skip over it completely Thank you
Poem Details | by
Rico Leffanta |
Categories:
culture, food, funny, nature, prayer, spiritual, word play,
No one likes dead lettuce
It must be crisp and cool
And dousing wounds with vinegar
Is certainly not cruel!
For Vegans can not see
Why lettuce choose to be
On a different frequency
Than Donald Trump might be
A salad will pass away
Shivering with cold today
Disgusted Vegans will say,
"I never heard lettuce pray"
Poem Details | by
Darlene Gifford |
Categories:
child, humor, thanksgiving day,
The children at the table,
all bowed their heads to pray,
and said what they were thankful for,
on this Thanksgiving day.
Then last to speak
was little wide-eyed Pegs,
"Thank you, Jesus," she prayed,
"for making turkey legs."
Poem Details | by
Cheryl Hoffman |
Categories:
anxiety, humor, prayer,
This past week it was raining cats and dogs,
prayed about it to not get so annoyed,
one car totaled other in infirmary,
husband tomorrow having triple bypass surgery,
Meow, Arf, Splat go land some more in the bog.
Poem Details | by
Robert Amure |
Categories:
christian, encouraging, funny, tribute,
Prayer For Bad Noose
(The Goitre Psalm)
The Lord is my Shepherd
I shall not want a Swollen Neck
He Leads me to the BEST Physician
He Restores my Throat
He Leads me through the dangers of Surgery
for His Name’s Sake
Yeah, thou I work through the Shallowest of Breath,
I fear it’s just “Goitre Go!!”…Thyroid -
and Thy Staff comfort me.
Thou Prepared an Operating Table for me……
You anointed my body with Anaesthesia …my Calm Runs over.
Surely with Your Goodness and Mercy shall I swallow…
….all the Days of my Life.
(The Fg 81.5.8)
Poem Details | by
Jack Ellison |
Categories:
angst, funny, prayer, technology,
12 o'clock... 12 o'clock... 12 o'clock!
How does one set the damn clock
Had to put a sheet on my new clock radio
To get the damn flashing to stop
Thought I was smart, quite intelligent
But technology has me all bamboozled
Tried reading the manual that comes with the unit
To comprehend, from my brain came refusal
My smart *** ten year old nephew came by
"Not a problem dear uncle, I'll fix it"
A minute and a half later, the damn flashing stopped
Felt dorkish and kind of a twit
My fervent prayer which I offer without malice
That technology buries this young geek
In a deluge of bits and bytes and firewalls
Till no longer he can get a night's sleep!
© Jack Ellison 2012
Poem Details | by
Clifford Villalon |
Categories:
dream, giving, humor, prayer,
Santa paid you a visit
Asking your wish not licit
Wishes come true in surprises
Dream simple, present comes double
Dream more, gifts granted like bubble
Dreams in cloud nine, waft in grubble
Riding on Santa's sleigh of comprises
Poem Details | by
Annie Lander |
Categories:
blessing, cheer up, dark, dedication, dream, feelings, humor,
The words have been the poem,
and a good poem should fulfill you
It can offer consolation and comfort
in your time of need
Lifts up your pens, you upcoming poets write to,
your heart contents let your words,
be a conversation topic, be the closing of
the graduation speech, because
rhythmic language thrives, so allow the poems
to speak for themselves.
Poem Details | by
Rico Leffanta |
Categories:
clothes, culture, funny, prayer, religion, remember, repetition,
God knows what you need
Before you need it
So why bend your knees
To chant or plead it?
Remember when you
Would make such a fuss
Each time your mum asked,
"Clean knickers for the bus?"
Poem Details | by
John Hamilton |
Categories:
funny, god, prayer, pride,
Impatience of the proud
The proud and the selfish always need to be first in line
They cannot wait for anyone their self- importance is so sublime
They even pray to God 'Oh Lord please help me to be patient and be kind
But, can you hurry it up please, I'm really out of time'!
John Derek Hamilton
February15,2016