Humorous and funny Sexy poems and/or funny poems about Sexy. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Sexy funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Sexy Poems.
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
farm, humorous, sexy,
A curvaceous lady named Mary
Just loved having sex in the dairy
When smothered with whipped cream
Her beau would lick her clean…
His Calorie intake was scary!!!
14th June 2016
Poem Details | by
Skat A |
Categories:
fantasy, funny,
"Sexy Who"
*Summer*
sand, oozing through toes
water down my swimsuit piece
how I love the sun
*Summer*
new sun-rays run my soul
wind swims around my pale skin
sunburn, ouch!
*Dizzy*
strong & Long Lasting
The Viagra moment fades
power by the sun
*Jerk Around*
secret moment
Vixen photos of my youth
rock hard & bigger
~SKAT~
Poem Details | by
Jerry T Curtis |
Categories:
food, funny, humorous, nonsense, romance, sexy, silly,
Is it Love
a simple bowl of ice cream
sweating from the heat
cherries on the top
huddled 'round and looking sweet
two little wooden paddles
pretend that they are spoons
as we sit beneath the stars
in the savor of the moon
your lips are all I see
as they caress them with a passion
the cherries on your tongue
in a delightful playful fashion
with our eyes intent and focused
in a stare of solemn trust
Is this ice cream truly love
or is it merely cherry lust
Poem Details | by
Verlena S. Walker |
Categories:
freedom, funny, sexy, teacher, technology, teen, teenage, together, vanity,
buck wild
rodeo style
_______________________|
PENNED ON AUGUST 14, 2014!
Poem Details | by
Cecilia Macfarlane |
Categories:
friendship, funny, halloween,
Sister, sister sitting there so sweet
Looking so virtuous, acting discreet.
Any male would eagerly bow at your feet
You have no idea of your allure, you're without conceit
Are you offering up a trick or a treat?
Only then will this Halloween finally be complete
Ready your answers to God when you do meet
For nuns of your stature are becoming obsolete!
For my girlfriend who dressed up as a sexy nun.
Poem Details | by
Richard Lamoureux |
Categories:
cute love, funny, longing, sexy,
She expected very little from the guy
A lesson she had learned long ago
Guys are after just one thing
It always started
With just one
Kiss
Then look out
For wandering hands
He would unbutton her top
Then next he would remove her brasier
She was so excited...she could hardly wait !
Non Rhyming version of Andrea's new form.
Poem Details | by
Rob Carmack |
Categories:
giving, humor, humorous, lust, passion, sexy, tribute,
Always salty and usually bitter
help encourage the spitter —
still better than the wonts
and those dreaded donts —
saved by the tolerable quitter.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Written: 05.08.21
Contest: Quitters Never Win
Sponsor: Margarita Lillico
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, poems, sexy,
Dirty old man
In the mood …
She's feelin hot hot hot
fancy a quickie?
Cross dressing
Lingerie
We should have seen the signs
What can go wrong when wearing a thong
Long and hard
What a whopper
Naked
Ecstasy
Wet dreams
moan moan moan
Hold on darling - I'm coming
This time YOU didn’t come second
Tell me why!
I was finding titles for Laura Loo’s contest and these are all original titles from some of my old poems…. I do worry about my muse!!
06-10-17
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
age, body, humorous,
Sue lies in her bed
boy she’s feeling HOT HOT HOT
dratted menopause!
04~08~17
Poem Details | by
Sebastian Aaron Baez |
Categories:
humor, sexy,
freaky
free week to be kinky
touch me
feel me
fervently
frequently
finger suck my pinkie
super freaky
superbly kinky
slowly
seductively
touch me
feel me
fervently
frequently
finger suck my pinkie
creamy substance
oozing
from my twinkie
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
giggle, humorous, sexy,
A young gigolo called Timothy
Gave sex for an exorbitant fee
But his passionate style
Sure made all ladies smile…
(I’m hoping that he’s got room for me!)
02~13~17
Poem Details | by
Rico Leffanta |
Categories:
funny, giggle, humor, lust, passion, sexy, woman,
Jan's spouse said she's gilding the lilies
For treating herself to new frillies
All the neighbours got hot
When they saw what she bought
And that really gave Jan the willies!
Poem Details | by
Anil Deo |
Categories:
allusion, cheer up, fun, humor, sexy,
But Jan, is this a Limerick trick?
Your family, truly, has no Dick and no Rick ...
I could have sworn
Since I, too, had been born
my family had to have had one Mr. Dick!
(c)Deo.I could not bring myself to declare it as clearly last week. Now Good Friday gives way to naughty Saturday ... have at it. Shalom.Smile: Jesus is not a prude, but He does have standards (No adultery, for one. Have limericks though)
Poem Details | by
Mike Gentile |
Categories:
fun, humor, humorous, men, sexy, woman,
Her last name was Agra, I saw on the bar
My nerves told me, I wouldn’t get very far
But then I did spy
Her first name was Vi
I worried no more as we walked to my car
A name like Vi Agra can make a guy think
Or run like Niagara gone over the brink
But one thing’s for sure
She won’t be a bore
Le’s hope it’s not over before I can blink!
Poem Details | by
L Milton Hankins |
Categories:
humorous, sensual, sexy,
A pretty winsome lady from Troy
Liked a remarkably handsome boy
She started to flirt,
By lifting her skirt
So he showed his retractable toy.
May 30, 2021
Poem Details | by
Deb Wilson |
Categories:
funny, garden, sexy,
There once was a cougar named Rose
who kept the young men on their toes.
Working in her garden
they'd say "beg your pardon
I'll bet you could use a good hose!"
for Bawdy Limericks Two contest
sponsored by Roy Jerden
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
body, humorous, people, relationship, sexy, woman, women,
The thorougher the skin peel,
the stronger the sex apeal.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
Robert Candler |
Categories:
confusion, home, humorous, husband, marriage, sexy, wife,
The dishes are done,
Kids are asleep and dreaming.
Want to watch T.V.?
Privacy at last.
The kids will not disturb us.
Want to hug and smooch?
The dishes are done.
No one will disturb us, but
She's got a headache.
Whatever I did,
It must have been bad, because
She keeps saying, "No."
Poem Details | by
Robert Candler |
Categories:
angel, beauty, blue, body, cute love, desire, feelings, giggle, girl, hello, hope, humorous, lust, relationship, romance, sexy, song, sweet, together, uplifting, woman,
Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.
You're just so damn sexy,
That's why I'm hittin' on you.
You don't have to love me,
Some good sex will do.
Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.
Yes, you turned me on
When I saw you walk in...
The face of an Angel,
A body just made for Sin.
Now, I may be real horny,
But one thing is true:
What would satisfy me, Girl
Would be to satisfy You.
So please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You;
And I hope that you're fallin'
In Lust with me too;
But if not, then please fake it,
Please don't leave me "blue"...
Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.
Poem Details | by
Shane Cooper |
Categories:
funny, husband, mom, sexy,
Yummy
Mummy
Chubby
Hubby
Jumping
Pumping
Moaning
Groaning
Huffing
Puffing
******
Sarcasm
Wants more
Loud snore
Poem Details | by
Reginald Telemacque |
Categories:
hilarious, horse, metaphor, race, sexy, sports, word play,
She opened her legs then hopped up on it
She gripped it tight then sat down on it
He started to move so she began to ride it
She loved the feeling cuz she enjoyed it
She pulled out the whip to show that she was master
And when she swung it he began to go faster
She started to scream at the top of her voice
For the way he made her feel her voice got so hoarse
After a thirty minute run he started to tire
For this horse was no longer young he was ready to retire
Poem Details | by
Flora Mae Gudez |
Categories:
creation, high school, hilarious, humorous, my children, sexy, woman,
I have a very brief confession
that I have to make.
It's about the selfies
and it'll make you break.
I only wear glamorous tops
during my homemade shots,
Since bottoms aren't seen
And only the face is on screen.
I give all my efforts
In putting some makeups
Just to look pretty on my selfie
And wrote on it -- hashtag no makeup.
I put on my lipsticks
And do the sexy duck face,
Then captioned the output with bible quotes
Though it doesn't relate.
Mom wondered
Why I locked myself in my room.
Oh please, I was just doing a selfie
and surprisingly came out well groomed.
Poem Details | by
Rob Carter |
Categories:
humor, humorous, love,
Daphne, I love you
in your purple dress
You're my favourite of the gang
to that I must confess
Your blonde friend just makes traps
and the brainy one is nerdy
The canine and the skinny one
eat huge burgers quite insanely
Your role is kind of quirky
but you're prettier than the others
I don't know who to thank for that
perhaps the animators
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
animal, humorous, men, people, poverty, relationship, sexy,
He's poorer, who rapes
poor apes.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
James Fraser |
Categories:
appreciation, for her, funny, humor, life, sexy, work,
I'm retired but do I still have a life
Yes, sexual adviser I am to my wife
But if I say try this
It'll be totally bliss
If I desire I'll ask for your advice
.
Challenged to write on the back of a Joke!