Humorous and funny Toe poems and/or funny poems about Toe. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Toe funny poems!
Written by
Michael Alexander
Categories:
humor,
Stubbed Toe
Silently washed ashore
this precarious log; from
where did you come, to
where do you go?
My dog, on you he'll
chew... I hate you.
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
funny, happiness, lost love, passion, people, romance, i love you,
My Sweet Camel Toe, Where'D You Go
Where'd you go?
oh where did you go
my precious camel toe?
played me like a fiddle
with your bubbly middle
you're such a skanky hoe
but I love you so
camel toe
camel toe
we had magic
we had fire
purple sweatpants my desire
come back camel toe
victory! camel toe
you're the villain
you're the winner
with your puffy
wedgied center
camel toe
camel toe
you're my sassy hoe
you're my Christmas snow
gone like cold wind blows
with your return
my member grows
I miss my camel toe
baby
where'd you go?
sweaty sweetie
camel toe
Written by
Gail Debole
Categories:
funny,
Portrait of My Big Toe
Written Gail DeBole
in 1997
There once was a toe that was big
and was helpful when dancing a jig.
At times it was stubbed,
and washed in a tub
and, when young, spent some time in a crib.
Note: Part of the Portrait Collection
Written by
Milton Toran
Categories:
funny,
Toe Jam
I once had a friend named Pete
Who never liked to wash his feet
Every time he removed his shoes
Your nose was bound to lose
Was foot powder obsolete?
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
funny,
My Big Toe
Have you ever wondered
Why your big toe is big?
Does it help with balance
While doing the jig?
Can you imagine
If all toes were large?
It would seem like walking
On a very large barge
Strange how everything
Seems the right size
Cause what if your arms
Were as big as your thighs?
Big toes are great
For testing your bath
Or counting to ten
To help with your math
One thing's for certain
They're just the right size
For stirring your soup
Or tying bow ties
This poem's for a friend
A new star in my sky
Sure hope she will like it
It's my very best try!
© Jack Ellison 2013
Written by
Robert L. Hinshaw
Categories:
funny,
'toe' Truck
I was following a speeding ambulance down the street the other day,
When it took a sharp corner and the back door flew open all the way!
A large Styrofoam box fell out and I screeched to a halt to peer inside.
What I found was so loathsome that my amazement I could not hide!
Nestling in packed ice and peering back at me was a human toe!
I reckoned it was being taken to a hapless chap on which to re-sew!
As a result of this very grave incident the only thing I knew to do,
Was summon a 'tow' truck! I think you would've done the same thing too!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Don't panic - this is another fictional write!
Written by
Glen Enloe
Categories:
cowboy-western, food, funny, social,
Cowboy Toe-Foo
I think that I shall never see
A cowboy that eats toe-foo—
Sech a dern thang jest could not be
In this ol’ bunkhouse crew!
Real men eats beef an’ pork an’ beans—
And all thangs within their reach—
Us real cowpokes drink coffee black—
Turn noses up at quiche!
Veggies should stay in ranch gardens—
These lips will taste no yogurt!
Good stew and biscuits make amends—
Seaweed makes bellies hurt!
Give us jerky or give us death—
Give us beans till we’re all blue—
But with all your strength and your breath—
Don’ serve us no toe-foo!
Written by
Romeo Naces
Categories:
funny
Sore Toe
.
My toe just stubbed
the stubborn
piano's iron foot.
It hurts like hell,
torments like a
cigarette butt.
Doc said: stay home,
don't walk, take a day
off or more.
I did, but now I'm
bored to death,
not only sore.
But boredom quickly
breeds some crazy
thoughts, you see.
Seems my easy chair
sits on me
uneasily.
Quite weirdly,
colors I now hear,
sounds I now see.
I ache to be
stirred as sugar
in hot coffee !
.
Written by
Sidney Hall Mad Poet
Categories:
funny
Rebellion of My Big Toe
I am sick and tired of these shoes
He kicks something, I always get a bruise
The buggers are tight
And they keep me outta sight
I'll trip him up the next time his out on the booze
Written by
James Edward Lee Sr.
Categories:
anxiety, funny, hurt, parody,
Joey Bowlin Drops the Ball Now His Toe Broken
Joey went bowlin
Dropped the ball his foot, now swollen
Only pinky and big toe broken
His best friend Fred
Said
Why? ya bleedin man!
Joey hop and jump
Still bowled a strike
Then Joel fell on the floor went thump!!!
2/5/18
written by James Edward Lee Sr.
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
2nd grade, 3rd grade, 4th grade, 5th grade, humorous,
Sully Had a Dirty Toe
Sully had a downright dirty toe
She scrubbed it ‘til it was aglow.
It shriveled and it coughed.
Then it promptly fell off.
At the end of my marigold row.
Written by
Karen Jones
Categories:
crush, feelings, funny love,
Toe Jam
He calls me baby
and you would think
he gave me pearls or something
I am so sweet on him
that slice bread is good with his toe jam
Yes I am wearing rose colored glasses
for he sweet to me like molasses
When I am in the store
Want to buy sexy stuff
You know the kind that will make him break his neck
Looking at what he bout to get
Wrong yes he can do wrong
But then the radio plays our song
And I’m melted like butter on grits by his kiss
I call him sweetie cause he easy and be cheesy
When I look him in his eyes intense like
Imma ride this wave till it is time to face new music.
But for now they playing our song.
Written by
Bernard F. Asuncion
Categories:
humor,
Rubber Toe
Who is the man with a rubber toe?
He is none other than Roberto.
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
humor, humorous,
Intrusive Toe Nails
Yelling their displeasure, my toenails kept me awake
Angry at how I was not trimming them
We are ragged and thick! We are jagged, not ripped!
They chastised me to hell and back. Have they quite flipped?
I promised I would do better if they would let me sleep.
They called me names like idiot, moron, and big creep.
I got up and trimmed them so low, they were now crying.
Walking on them felt excruciating, I was now dying.
I guess that by trying to teach them a lesson, I learned one instead.
Sometimes I am impulsive, do not use my head.
The next time they wake me up, here is the deal.
I am going to grind them all off with a power saw wheel.
Written by
Abdul Malik
Categories:
humor,
Toe Trap
Not from afar, close by, quite near
She cried out aloud; oh, in sheer fear,
She set the trap for the mouse at night
But got her toe caught in the daylight.
~Contest: Your best four-line light verse#2
~Sponsor: L Milton Hankins.
Written by
Daisy Ward
Categories:
games, humor,
Tick-Tack-Toe
The game was tick-tack-toe
One person tried to put on a show
But got caught in the game
Then tried to re-claim
And won ten games in a row