Humorous and funny Ugly poems and/or funny poems about Ugly. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Ugly funny poems!
Written by
Nwando Obianyor
Categories:
animals, funny, nature,
The Ugly Vulture
The ugly vulture flasps and hops,
Flies and scraps and walks and stops,
Pecks to a tree and looks around,
For rotten rubbish on the ground.
He likes dead things and he pecks them clean,
He's horribly ugly,dull and mean,
Hunchy shoulders,old bald head,
He'd like me better if I were dead!
But look at him in the high blue sky,
Round and round you see him fly,
Higher and higher he turns and swings,
Climbing the air with unmoving wings.
Written by
Ismael Nieves
Categories:
funny, hope, people, uplifting
Ugly But Successful
Abraham Lincoln
was an ugly ducklin';
but became president
among the eminent.
Written by
Emma Anonymous
Categories:
children, funny,
Ugly Animals
I'm forced to wonder when I see
Horrid beings such as these
Did God not know that dirty, nasty, ugly features
Make the most ungodly creatures?
Written by
Randy Johnson
Categories:
funny, hilarious, humor, wife,
As Ugly As a Wicked Witch
I told my wife that she looks like a wicked witch.
And then I had to go to the hospital to be stitched.
She's always been angry and bitter because she's not good looking.
She looks even more like a witch when she eats because her face turns green from my terrible cooking.
She tells people that she's pretty but they refuse to hear her.
I have to clean up the broken glass after she looks in mirrors.
If each broken mirror brings seven years of bad luck, she's in for seven hundred unlucky years.
I also have bad luck because she says that she'll never leave me and that drives me to tears.
(This is a fictional poem)
Written by
Barbara Barry-Nishanian
Categories:
fashion, humor, mother daughter,
Ugly Piercing
<
Ugly Piercing
Directing my attention
to the boogers up your nose
is about as beautiful
as the dirt between you toes.
Barbara Barry Nishanian
July 18, 2018 copyright
All rights reserved
Written by
Charles Sides
Categories:
children, funny,
Greens Are Ugly Things
I can’t eat those greens
Greens are ugly things
Could you eat them, if I show you how?
I can’t eat them like a rabbit
I can’t eat them like cow
I can’t eat them like anything
I don’t want to learn how
I can’t eat those greens
Greens are ugly things
Would you like them with pepper or salt?
I don’t like them with pepper
I don’t like them with salt
I don’t like them on my plate
Serving Greens to me must halt!
I can’t eat those greens
Greens are ugly things
Could you eat them cooked or raw?
I can’t eat them if they’re cooked
I can’t eat them if their raw
I can’t eat fixed anyway
I CAN’T EAT THEM, Ma & Pa
I can’t eat those greens
Greens are ugly things
Written by
Emily Pascale
Categories:
funny, home, home,
Ugly
Ugly
Eww! What’s this crap all over my face?
Feeling ugly and like such a disgrace.
Too embarrassed to go outside.
Stay home and my face I hide.
I slap on foundation
but this acne’s formed it’s own nation.
I pop my pimples in desperation.
I’ve caused scars, a hideous creation.
When will this stop? Never?
Maybe I’m stuck like this forever.
“Calm down this stress can’t be good”.
Friends encourage, “you’re still beautiful, Understood?”
Slapping prescriptions and home remedies all over my face.
Relax, this will go away at its own pace.
I stopped crying and patiently I wait.
It’s over, lookin good, I can finally go on my date. :)
Written by
Kable Hendrix
Categories:
funny, parody, people, visionary,
The Ugly
I am not afraid
I feel no fear
I am never scared
This is how I felt until I saw your face
It makes me want to faint and on top of that your breath is stank
Your clothes are ranky
You are a foe and not my friend
I hope to never see your face again
If I do it will be the end of me
One look at your face and you will be rid of me
You are what you are
You are the Ugly
Written by
Mike Hauser
Categories:
funny, humor,
Ugly
Over the years
it's plain to see
I've lost most things
but my ugly
Most folks I know
would agree
Ugly has always
looked good on me
Ain't no sense
trying to figure out
How all this ugly
came to come about
Or how it is
the only thing
That has ever really
stuck with me
Lost most my mind
and all my shape
Not enough math Pi
and too much cake
The hardest thing
that is to fake
Is the face of ugly
I face every day
Written by
Sotto Poet
Categories:
cheer up, confusion, cool, humanity, humor, humorous, imagination,
Ugly Downhill
People's life was ruined and degrading almost instantly, said the CDC.
Things quickly shifted into an icky situation, devolved ugly by NPA.
Things went from awful to worse astonishingly, with SSA.
To be fair, things were a lot worse, obviously, because of COVID.
Originally, situations were commonly grisly, WHO
Despite being performed with keen care, it still ugly, said CIA.
It becomes ugly at times, but mostly entirely at YMCA.
Things seemed to turn messy quietly but in an idyllic way after AHLM.
03/16/2021
Written by
Sidney Beck
Categories:
funny,
Ugly Or Pretty
UGLY OR PRETTY ?
When I was about twenty three
I said, Joey, I have a homely new girl,
My pal Joey says to me, . . . .oh Lee
I’ll bet your heart’s in a whirl -
He says, tell me, is she either
Tall or small, ugly or pretty, Lee?
I had to be honest. I said, neither -
I guess she’s kinda pretty ugly.
My friend Martha added with phlegm,
She’s so ugly I could leave
My husband with her no problem -
And his story I would believe.
Written by
Elton Camp
Categories:
humor, , cute,
Your Baby Is Really Ugly
Your Baby Is Really Ugly
By Elton Camp
At no time and in no way
Will anyone these words say
For electing to tell the truth
In such a case is too uncouth
Wise folks play the praise game
Even when the words sound lame
Tell the parents what they’d hear
Or never again, to them, come near
The baby’s head come to a point
And its nose looks out of joint
Plus, it is terribly cross-eyed
And couldn’t smile if it tried
There’s nothing that it can do
Except from its orifices spew
Spindly leg and undeveloped arm
Blue skin should sound an alarm
But if the truth you ever dare to tell
Expect to hear, “You can go to hell.”
If words you are compelled to utter,
“Oh, how cute,” you’d better mutter
Written by
Panagiota Romios
Categories:
humor,
Ugly Ad
Love the ad, above this poem,a woman with hanging jowls?
Makes me laugh, not scowl!
Another one, had a word that rhymes with dart!
Obnoxious ads, with which I want no part!
6/10/2021
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
hilarious,
Crazy Looney Ugly Bug Face
Crazy looney ugly bug face.
Lazy, croony juggly mug race.
Daisy June-y muggly hug mace
Hazy, moony huggly rug chase.
Playing with words is so much fun.
I like them to prance from sun to sun.
Thrill of poetry writing is never done.
Crazy looney ugly bug face has won.
Written by
Alkas Poetry
Categories:
allegory, allusion, fun, hilarious, humorous, metaphor,
I Notice When I Am Ugly
I notice when I'm ugly...
smiles close
the words are silent,
no one answers me...
only the flies risk
to approach me.. !