Humorous and funny Welcome poems and/or funny poems about Welcome. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Welcome funny poems!
Written by
Brenda Meier-Hans
Categories:
happy, humorous, love, silly,
Welcome To My Bio
Brenda Gail
I am Compassionate, love and breathe poetry, humorous and a peace maker.
Sister of Patti Lynne, Paul, David and Beth.
I love children (more), I love to sing in a choir and have a song for just about everything. I love to make others happy.
I feel loved, appreciated and very blessed.
I fear not being healthy enough to make it to my son’s wedding, getting sick this winter and losing my mom.
I’d love to be able to travel again, walk around a mall, and would love to be in a poetry slam.
Living in the GTA Greater Toronto Area, Ontario.
Meier-Hans
Written by Brenda Meier-Hans
10.13.2014
Regina Riddles Contest: Bio Poems
1st
Written by
Doris Culverhouse
Categories:
funny
Welcome Winter
Winter's chill is invigorating
Like and electric chair--zap!
Those cold hands make me want to run screaming
Get those icicles away from me!! Oh snap!
Welcome winter, don't last too long, where is my cap?
The blustery wind in less than fifty degrees
Cuts like a knife, injury to injury I say, winter don't stay
High heating bills, charge account is over drawn, PLeeease!
The daylight is short and the sky is gray
Why does it have to get this way??
For Carol Brown(for the contest)
Oh yeah welcome WINTER!
Christmas charge account is over drawn??
I owe what??
Written by
Daniel Davies
Categories:
family, freedom, happy, humorous,
Welcome Back
Mum and dad are dead
I’m their only offspringing
No kids... I know of.
Most my half brothers
Hate my existence because
I’m like their father.
Who they loved to hate
I can’t blame their projected
Da Nile of my love.
I care about them
About as much as I care
What they think of me.
I’m so wild and free
Without any family
Except my doggy.
He keeps me grounded
Barks at my insanity
I don’t let him growl.
I have lots of friends
Who are my real family
They look after me.
Until I wear out
My fluctuating welcome
Back reality.
The first day of May
Two thousand and some sixteen
Was when I wrote this.
Written by
John Williams
Categories:
funny,
Welcome Back Jack
Jack is back, your face will crack,
This old guy just has the knack,
He'll split your sides,
Possibly your strides,
I think he'll be causing much flack.
authors note: strides are another name for trousers in Australia
Written by
Verlena S. Walker
Categories:
age, america, community, conflict, culture, funny, jealousy,
Welcome To the Soup
WELCOME TO THE SOUP!
This is Poetry Diva.
I know when I am being cheated.
Between first and fifth place my poems define.
If not, I have not follow the syllable count.
However, in rhyme, couplet, free verse, etcetera, I am never an underdog.
Therefore, why do I enter contests when I know it favoritism on the Soup y’all?
Well, a true Poet or Poetess, as prior stated, never lose.
Welcome to the SOUP!
_____________________|
PENNED ON AUGUST 27, 2014!
Written by
Robert Pettit
Categories:
funny
The Un-Welcome Mat
I
Do not
Want to hear
Your sales pitches.
I need no brushes.
I do not eat cookies.
I donated blood last week.
I have a good vacuum cleaner.
I have no time to read magazines.
Please do not tell me your religion.
Do I look like I wear makeup?
I have an alarm system.
You do not need my vote.
I just cut the grass.
I do not smoke.
So you can
Just get
Lost.
This is a double nonet
Written by
Effie Blake
Categories:
funny, introspection, philosophy,
Don'T Wear Out Your Welcome
dandelions have
a short stay. they adorn the
ground then blow away.
Written by
Judy Ball
Categories:
funny, life, seasons,
Welcome To Alberta
WELCOME TO ALBERTA
Winter's passed, the snow is gone,
The weather's mild and sunny.
I dream sweet dreams of lazy days,
And eating clover honey.
Then suddenly the wind comes up,
First rain and then wet snow.
This morning it was plus fifteen,
And now it's ten below.
Welcome To Alberta
Judy Ball
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
humor, humorous, irony, people, places, pride, psychological,
Welcome To Fairs
Who gives himself airs,
you're welcome to fairs.
Volodymyr Knyr
2017
Written by
Jessica Thompson
Categories:
friendship, uplifting,
Funny Soupy Welcome
Funny Soupy Welcome
_________________________
Thanks for the taste, you're the soupy-est~
no matter the oldest, or the newy-est~
all these new friends are the truey-est~
Welcome to the SOUP............
6/24/14-Jessica Thompson
Written by
Elton Camp
Categories:
funny
Welcome Back Daylight Saving Time
Welcome Back Daylight Saving Time
By Elton Camp
Not very many would ever guess
End of “saving” there isn’t an “s”
We can’t keep the name straight,
But the idea is one that’s so great
Some will think that I am just wrong,
I want daylight saving all year long
I don’t like dark when I finish work
Shorter days nearly drive me berserk
After March thirteen, five becomes six
For me, that neat shift will do the tricks
Thus, the time that we once called four
Is handily renamed five, so out the door
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
care, city, humor, thank you, word play,
Welcome, All Ye Immigrants
Chicago, New York, San Francisco -- such
A deluge of immigrants -- they have clutched
At first they were trying
But now they are crying
Leaving out, "Sanctuary very much!"
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
games, giggle, satire,
Welcome To the Show
Welcome to 'Just Say No'
As you all know
The object of the game
Is to avoid everlasting shame
No juicy secrets may be revealed
That's the easy part of the deal
No matter what transpires
You must not light the audience's fire
With salacious tidbits or lascivious lies
That's the only way you win first prize
A weekend without smartphone, social media or TV
Indulge yourself ~ in a Shakespearean reading spree
Written by
Sammantha Wood
Categories:
death, funny, life,
Welcome To My Hell
Welcome to my Hell
If you need help just ring the bell
You weren't liked by the world out there
So now you're here. Life's not fair
That's our motto here
Anyway I need to finish my beer
So I'll show you your room
Where you can spend your afternoon
I won't bother telling you enjoy your stay
It wouldn't help you anyway
Written by
Julie Grenness
Categories:
bridal shower, emotions, giggle, humor, love, wedding,
Welcome
This is a waste of thought,
Things life never thought,
Where is your faceless bride?
Her I'd welcome inside,
She'll rescue you from your rut,
Here's your tea, suck that up!
The faceless bride, tee hee,
She'll rescue you from me,
My torrid non-embrace,
Welcome bride, faceless face!
Something life never taught,
Stop wasting my thoughts!
Written by
Elton Camp
Categories:
funny,
Welcome To Bruno's Mens' Wear
Welcome to Bruno’s Mens’ Wear
By Elton Camp
The clerk in the mens’ clothing store
Saw one who hadn’t been there before
He was striding along extremely fast
As the clerk spoke, he went on past
The man darted into the dressing room
And slammed the door with a boom
For security the clerk started to call
When the customer let our a bawl
Horrid words he then came to hear
“There’s no toilet paper in here!”
Written by
Anais Vionet
Categories:
culture, funny, horror, humor, missing you, technology, teen,
Welcome Back Poetrysoup
Welcome back PoetrySoup!
What the heck happened
Will we ever know the scoop?
Did the Aliens get you or better yet
Homeland security put your servers on a jet.
Or you bet all your money on Facebook stock
and the sun-cream fiasco put you in a head-lock?
Wait! The server caught COVID - which must be a first -
And your back online because its over the worst?
What ever it was - I’m REALLY glad to see you -
‘Cause I’m a half-assed poet who REALLY needs you.
Welcome backkkkkkkkkkkkk!
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
best friend, dance, fun, humorous, money,
Welcome To My Random World, If I Was a Penny and You Were a Pound
If I was a penny and you were a pound,
we could dance around and around.
They would spend us in every store,
looking for the very best score.
Hope we make it into the money drawer,
we don't want to hit the floor.
If I was a penny and you are a pound, when they run out of us they will frown.
Their shopping will be over, but we will remain closer.
A penny a pound, forever more.
Date: 9/17/2019
Written by
Lin Lane
Categories:
animal, humor,
Welcome To the Zoo
Hello there. I'm talking to you
Thank you for visiting the zoo
Any day of the week will do
My name is Lou My name is Lou
I've grown so very tall in height
My long legs are a silly sight
I'm a giraffe and I don't fight
Nor do I bite Nor do I bite
My body looks like brown ink blots
There are many splotches and spots
I'm glad they are not polka dots
There are lots There are lots
Green leaves are mostly what I eat
Celery is a special treat
I'm told giraffes never eat meat
Please take a seat Please take a seat
Today is hot, so have a rest
Lots of people I see are stressed
You have been such a nice zoo guest
One of the best One of the best
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
humor, humorous, women,
Gladys the Welcome Wizard Lady is Here
Miss Gladys the Welcome Wizard lady is here
She is full of sass, beyond an insane level of cheer
No one wants to let her in, we try to ignore the bell
She climbs in the front window, demolishing the sill.
Hi we say, faking a smile, pretending to be pleased.
She retains weird enthusiasm, her pitch a little wheezed.
We are yawning through her brochure-filled presentation
She feigns happiness, another welcome wizard celebration.
She gets paid for every family whom she annoys
On the way out, she stubs her toe on one of baby’s toys
We did not apologize, maybe this is why she is suing
But judge, we argue candidly, her getting in was not our doing.
Written by
Anisha Dutta
Categories:
funny,
Welcome 2018
Welcome 2019
Two thousand nineteen is seen almost to enter.
The new calendar is too clear to monitor.
Twelve months to run again.
Old couple to regain
strength to kick ball as opponents play at center.
12/26/18
'let's Have Fun' Contest by Shadow Hamilton
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
flower, fun, giggle, snow, spring, weather, winter,
Goodbye Winter Welcome Spring
"We must say, goodbye to winter but do not be sad. It will come back again next year with a big smile and plenty of snow. Now we welcome Spring to enjoy." By Poet
Winter can be very cold,
the wind will sing and be very bold.
The ground is covered with fluffy snow,
to play in as the swirls will blow.
Spring is now in the air,
flowers and trees are blooming everywhere.
Springtime in my pretty garden is starting to grow,
oh no do you see a huge old black crow.
Spiced tea in my garden is for me,
I love the butterflies and the big yellow bee.
Spring can be so much fun,
sitting with my flowers and the bright sun.
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
11th grade, 12th grade, fun, halloween, hilarious, humor, humorous,
Welcome To Ouija Board Central
Welcome to Ouija Board Central
The wildest shop on Witch and Warlock Boardwalk
Making a good match is imperative
Do not take one of our particular boards out of the store
Unless you sync with it in a good way
People have been blown up seconds after leaving
if the board is unhappy about the match.
Ouija boards have a strong sense of right
They choose you, based on personality
Do not try to charm them. They will cut you.
Stay as long as you like.
I will be in the back, in my panic room.
Leave the money on the counter.
Written by
A. Ormulyce
Categories:
humor,
Welcome
Sparrows on the hazelnut trees in bloom
welcome spring. A pleasure to follow
the small brook that weaves through the trees.
A little farther, hidden,
the pale cottage where lives
the witch who transforms
the curious
explorers
into
toads.