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Funny Poems About Angst or Angst Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Angst poems and/or funny poems about Angst. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Angst funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Angst Poems.

Poem Details | by Mary Nagy |
Categories: angst, daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, car,

Princess Needs A New Car

Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '

'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust! 
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.

'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much, 
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'! 

Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.


Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: angst, humorous,

- A Tribute To The Washing Machine -


I received an email today :
"Would you like to join
The Underpants Club"
A new underwear
directly at your door
once a month
(for only 20 bucks)
Did you say once a month?
My mother taught me
Replace after one use - without exception

In the old days
they had not heard of bacteria ...
but changed underpants
at least every other Saturday
When spring came
it was time for laundry
that took place outdoors,
at the creek or the water post
where there was plenty of clean water available
Fleas and lice are nasty
... and itches terribly








28.02.2020
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved

Poem Of The Day: 01.03.2020

Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: angst, feelings, humorous,

- The Soup Cuckoo -




Jealousy is not the fear of losing
but the feeling that our position is threatened
As wet sand between your toes, unwanted

Sometimes jealousy turns into obsession
There are many wars, love your enemies ... never
We fight for love as a tender and small sparrow
Bitter taste, there is a fly in the soup











  17.01.2017
- Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
  Copyright © All Rights Reserved

                 (\__/)
                (>'.'<)
                (")_(")

Poem Details | by Leo Larry Amadore |
Categories: angst, culture, freedom, funny, introspection, judgement,

What Fools

"You shall know the Truth, and the Truth
Shall make you free."


We wait for what will never happen;
the consequences of inaction
may overtake at any moment.
Vaguely felt suspicions foment,
feed uneasiness; words half-formed
hang in air, hover just out of reach,
didactic, but never really heard --
misunderstood, despised, ignored,
or ridiculed...One must not preach!
But harken back to days of yore:
attend, and hear repeated,
as before, and yet once more:
"What fools these mortals be!"
How perfectly descriptive -- of me!

Poem Details | by Peter Dome |
Categories: angst, dog, guitar, humorous, people,

Stupid questions

It never seems to amaze me
How stupid some people are
Whenever I am out
And take along my guitar.

''Is it a guitar'' people say
''No an ironing board''
I reply with dismay.

''Can you play it?''
''No I just carry it about for fun''
Even though it's a heavy one.

''Are they your dogs''
When out in town
''No'' I reply
''their someone else's
And I'm taking them back to get the ransomed money honey.''
After a while i's an annoyance and not that funny.



Peter Dome.copyright.2015. Oct.

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: angst, humorous,

A Letter From The IRS

You have disregarded instructions
Thus claiming improper deductions
Send money by mail
And IF you should fail
Your paycheck will suffer reductions...


“The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax” - Albert Einstein
Submitted for: John Freeman’s contest

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: angst, anxiety, art, friendship, humorous, imagery,

Friends

They love you
When you defend them
They run
When you need a helping hand

Real ones are there in total silence
Called the silent ones
To massage the pain
Inside
Of a wounded soul
They were there long ago
They are there now in the snow
Holding hands
Never letting go
Friends

Wiping tears
Striking fears
Praying for good cheer
Please me lord
Serve me one more beer




Poem Details | by Shelly Berkeley |
Categories: angst, animals, funny, pets, old, old,

Barky Von Schnauzer

At the risk of being called “rabble-rouser,”
I think poor old Barky Von Schnauzer,
should practice his aim,
his master to maim,
in the back end of his very best trousers!


My hero I would call dear old Barky,
if he could just muster the stealth of a sharky,
and covertly steer,
right straight for the rear,
of that great big old bag of malarkey!



I think I should send Barky a big four leaf clover,
so his bad luck would finally be over,
he could retire his fame,
move away, change his name,
to Bowser maybe Lassie or Rover!


Obviously I have been driven completely insane by that stupid t.v. commercial!
Happy St. Paddy's Day!

Poem Details | by Sarah Jones |
Categories: angst, funny, imagination, mystery, philosophy,

The Toilet Dream Speaks The Truth

I had a dream
Where all my clothes
Were in my toilet bowl
Clogging it.

Apparently this means that
I am drenched in emotions
Which need to be released
And expressed,

So I wrote
This poem.

Poem Details | by Michael Degenhardt |
Categories: angst, funny

Holy Follicle!!

Oh, I am so angered, outraged and appalled
I think that I’m going bald
My dad had great hair
So I never really cared
But, to the hair club for men I am called

From my butt, they could extract some hair
Because I think I have so much to spare
But I cannot tell
Do you think it would smell?
Oh well I think, I’ll just leave it there

Poem Details | by JSLambert Mister ROBOTO |
Categories: angst, confusion, depression, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, introspection, life, love, passion, people, philosophy, romance, social, sorry

Shameful Morning

not sure how she got here 
only know she needs to leave

underneath the stranger 
my arm numb; asleep, 
mouth a desert.
a hundred dead cigarettes dance my tongue dry 

princess of night 
exposed by light. 
get me out of this;
another dreaded morning mess. 

bed broken
along with my will. 
I swore never again; 
the lie is half the thrill.

~JSLambert

Poem Details | by tom bell |
Categories: adventure, angst, confusion, funny, social,

Kristin Listen!

Hello my friend,
Hope all is well
This is your bud,
'Ol tom bell
You might wish
To read this poem
"Bad Day at the Eyedoctors"
A true tom tale
And shows what a fool I be
So check it out,
And you'll see!

Poem Details | by Xavier Keough |
Categories: allegory, angst, funny, life,

Prelude to a Poke

I do not recall
The bravado with which I spoke
The titillating prose
Seduction’s prelude to a poke
You spoke of love
with a lust that I understand
your heart a bloom
your derriere met my hand
I pulled you closed
my eyes nearly met yours
your bosom winked  
thank God I wore drawers
Do you not see
that my passions are pure
a burning in my loins
for which water has no cure
We gazed upon the heavens
I wrapped her in the moonlight
I looked at the time
my prayers faded into night
We danced till dawn
I had answered her romantic call
I whispered sweet somethings
Before her foot procured my fall

Poem Details | by Kim Rodrigues |
Categories: angst, humor, valentines day,

VALENTINE SCHMALENTINE

VALENTINE SCHMALENTINE Walking on bleeding hearts like eggshell parts My valentine broke Cupid’s angel wings I don’t know what to believe when he brings Ample heart-shaped boxes of Chocolate darts We’ve been together since I don’t know when He loves me he loves me not a gold ring He comes home when he wants to, it’s his thing Doesn’t like when I question where’s he been Hopefully he’ll propose on bended knee Expecting a dozen wild red roses Or lay some myself where he decomposes And his valentine, that’s me, will be free
1/21/2017 Contest

Poem Details | by randy johnson |
Categories: angst, funny, on work and working, me, me,

A 94 year old woman kicked my ###

(This is a fictional poem)

A 94 year old woman kicked my ###.
She beat the crap out of me and left me bleeding on the grass.
Every time I got up, she knocked me down again.
She beat me really hard and I sure as hell didn't win.
The fight started when she asked me to put out my cigar.
I told her that I'd shove it up her vagina and I guess I went too far.
When she got through beating me, I had lost most of my teeth.
Now people laugh at me and all I feel is grief.

Poem Details | by Judy Ball |
Categories: angst, humanity, humor,

WHEN IT HITS THE FAN REMEMBER

Sometimes stuff happens,
Sometimes caused by fears,
Sometimes by mistakes we make,
That put us in arrears.

No matter what caused it,
No matter who,
Pointing fingers won't help things,
Get better for you.

It won't help to argue,
And fuss and fight,
To lay blame on others,
Won't make things right.

We may lose some sleep,
And we may shed some tears,
But sometimes stuff happens,
And just seems to smear;

And all the precautions,
You take just don't matter,
'Cause sometimes stuff happens,
And just seems to splatter.

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: allah, angel, angst, confusion, dream, education, faith, freedom, god, happiness, health, heaven, history, holocaust, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, miracle, nature, on writing and words, pain, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religious, sad, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,

Haikus About God: III

Beauty of nature
Why condense it down to God?
Isn’t life enough?

Poem Details | by Peter Dome |
Categories: angst, funny, hilarious, humorous,

Missing sock mystery solution

One of the biggest mystery's 
Known to man that makes no sense to me
Is why when washing a pair of socks
You can only ever find one
The solution don't buy just two socks but three
One for the sock fairy and a pair for us
End of the mystery.

Case closed mystery solved.



Peter Dome.copyright.2014.July.

Poem Details | by J.W. Earnings |
Categories: angst, change, childhood, confusion, depression, fear, feelings, children, kids, funny, growing up, home, homework, humor, inspiration, lonely, me, miss you, moving on, nature, pain, poetry, school, self, sorrow, stress, teen, time, writing, youth,

My Boredom Disease

Like sick allergies, 
Boredom can be passed around
I call it: THE BOREDOM DISEASE

Like a horrid storm,
Boredom can catch you off guard
Hold on for DEAR LIFE!

Like the whooping cough,
Boredom can be serious
If I were you, I’d
Get a vaccination ! 

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: allah, angel, angst, courage, dream, education, faith, fantasy, fear, funny, god, heaven, history, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, mystery, nostalgia, on work and working, parody, passion, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religion, religious, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Poem Details | by Cona Adams |
Categories: angst, brother, children, clothes, family, funny, school,

School Days

(and long brown stockings) 

I detest these stockings,
they're coarse, brown and ugly.

I hate the garters more;
elastic circles that cut off 
circulation and fail to halt 
the laddering down my skinny legs.

If only . . . I picture myself
in warm jeans and no teasing
from Tommy Rogers.

I put the garters to better use,
roll the repulsive stockings
down around my ankles. 

Tommy taunts,
"Who gave you
jointed toothpicks for legs?"

I lost it.

Now, Tommy has a black eye
and my nose is in the corner.


Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: angst, desire, humorous, irony, life, lust, sorrow,

Oh Well

Bill stared at a cute butt going by.
Wishing he were much bolder, he sighed,
"I would give all my pay
To roll that in the hay."
But looked up to see 'she' was a guy.

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, angst, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, education, faith, farewell, funny, humorous, imagination, introspection, lonely, loss, lost, memory, pain, parody, passion, people, places, retirement, sad, science fiction, sorrow, sorry, space, star, teacher, time, travel, tribute, visionary,

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.

Poem Details | by Julie Grenness |
Categories: allusion, angst, books, confusion, education, giggle,

ALGEBRA

ALGEBRA


Satan's hallucinations made him giggle,
Numbers and letters made to wiggle,
Satan arose one morning,
A day on Earth a'dawning,
Satan spake from far above,
Fist in his iron glove...
" I mix numbers and letters,
To make mathematics better,
Evermore there shalt be...
ALGEBRA!!!!!!"

Yes, numbers and letters made to wiggle,
Satan's hallucinations made him giggle.

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: angst, change, giggle, happy, how i feel, humorous, journey, judgement, life, philosophy, self, simple, success, truth, wisdom,

A Better Way

There must have been a better way.
There's just no way around it.
Family and friends kept saying so;
But, somehow, I've never found it.

Honestly, I really never looked,
Thought life was treating me well;
But to hear those folks tell it,
My life's a living Hell

Always fraught with bad decisions...
In their opinions, I should say.
I'm sure they all wonder how
I make it through each day.

They could by right, I guess;
Although I must say,
If they were all as happy as I,
They would think they'd found a better way.