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Funny Poems About Baptism or Baptism Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Baptism poems and/or funny poems about Baptism. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Baptism funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Baptism Poems.

Poem Details | by brittney lopez |
Categories: absence, age, angel, april, baptism, beautiful, beauty, bible, birth, blue, boat, body, books, boyfriend, bridal shower, flower, for her, forgiveness, freedom, funny, games, garden, girlfriend, goodbye, graduation, poetry, voice, wisdom, women, words, writing, youth,

Skin

You send bolts through my skin 
something I was never to 
accomplish with you, when I 
saw you it's like my heart sank 
to my stomach and I was in 
shock my body still my body 
heavy felt like when I moved I 
was about to fall to my knees 
you make me want to get 
inside my brain pick you up and 
take you out pick you one by 
one like a flower because I do 
love you and love you not.


Poem Details | by Jimmi Canada |
Categories: baptism, beauty, city, eve, first love, funny, gender, god, history, independence day, mystery, mythology, night, obituary, raven, sea, silly, summer, sweet, teacher, world, yellow,

Roll on

Lauren Hill slow songs thrill,

they pop like a fast moving pill,

I am flopped on top of a junk food bill,

and running with a skunk who tells me to take in my fill-

like leading um' on into my dream,
I create a festering lean,

I rank every thought in order of how I like it,

and prep for a long time that's gonna break all the cycles.

Striding with my shrine,

as I shock a spine,

revitalize and prime-

as I preen and primp and chimp-

as I act like a pimp,

I black out and gimp,

skimp out on my dying moment because death is no shrimp!

Poem Details | by Chukwuemeka Mbah |
Categories: allah, allegory, angel, baptism, boyfriend, business, christian, devotion, funny, jesus, spiritual,

Pages of the Book

On earth on a Mission
purpose redefined with singleness of vision
clarity came cause i sat to look
through the pages of the book


Some days skipped with nothing to dine
some nights slept with nothing to wine
yet more nourished than a royal cook
for i am best fed from the pages of the book


When I lost focus and fell
drowning in the depths of the well
yet I was lifted by an unseen hook
as i flipped through the pages of the book


What about you my dear friend
when the terrestrial race comes to an end
and death vomits all that it ever took
will your name be found on the pages of the book

Poem Details | by gary thomas |
Categories: baptism, humorous,

Lord Ha-Ha

Blessed be the name of Lord Ha-Ha.
I worship at the altar of Ha-Ha.
In his blood I am washed.
In his raiment I am clothed.
In his breastplate I will conquer
And in his name I will trust.

The honor of his blessing I will seek.
The grace of his presence I will covet.
He leads me to channel 60
He splitteth my sides. 
My cups runneth over with mammary juice.
The fruit of his womb is as ambrosia
And I will dwell in the house of Ha-Ha forever.

Poem Details | by Kim Rodrigues |
Categories: humor, sea,

BAPTISM OF DUCKS

BAPTISM OF DUCKS

Waves shake little boat, smug ducks out at sea.
They sing drinking songs, rambunctious with glee.
Rising waves, quicker,
with more downed liquor.
Unloaded ducks drink.  The waves set them free.

8/16/2017

Poem Details | by Robert Gruhn |
Categories: atheist, baptism, hilarious,

WITHOUT THE BUMPS IN THE ROAD OF LIFE

WITHOUT THE BUMPS IN THE ROAD OF LIFE
 iT wOULD bE lIKE oNE lONG eX-LaX fREEWAY! ;)))

cOPYRIGHT 2018
 rOBERT wILLIAM gRUHN

Poem Details | by Rick Dickulous |
Categories: america, anger, baptism, baseball, celebration, humor, october,

Hymns of a Cubs Fan

New girl. Lots of hope and aspirations. This town. This bar. Both can make you love life. I’m sure you’ll find what it is you’re looking for. Just stop singing about the f***ing Cardinals when “Go Cubs Go” is playing. You dreadful cun*ed cun*.