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Funny Poems About Bio or Bio Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Bio poems and/or funny poems about Bio. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Bio funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Bio Poems.

Poem Details | by Brenda Meier-Hans |
Categories: happy, humorous, love, silly,

Welcome to my Bio

Brenda Gail 
I am Compassionate, love and breathe poetry, humorous and a peace maker.
Sister of Patti Lynne, Paul, David and Beth.
I love children (more), I love to sing in a choir and have a song for just about everything. I love to make others happy.
I feel loved, appreciated and very blessed.
I fear not being healthy enough to make it to my son’s wedding, getting sick this winter and losing my mom.
I’d love to be able to travel again, walk around a mall, and would love to be in a poetry slam.
Living in the GTA Greater Toronto Area, Ontario.
Meier-Hans 

Written by Brenda Meier-Hans 
10.13.2014
Regina Riddles Contest: Bio Poems
1st


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

THIS IS ME

Janet Margaret (Jan… or in some poems Stan) compassionate, loyal, humourous... always uses an extra 'u' Daughter of John and Barbara Lover of men with greying hair, plain chocolate, orchids Who feels men shouldn’t dye their greying hair, sweet shops here should be open 24/7 Who fears losing my faculties, my parent’s demise, living on my own Who would like to see Pompeii, Easter Island and meet you guys for real Resident of the Isle of Man Allison Jan Allison 12th October 2014 Contest: Bio Poems Sponsor: Regina Riddle ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by tom bell |
Categories: father, funny, imagination, father, father,

True Story

As related by my father;

Once, long ago,
he rear ended a cop car
Not a happy thing you know...
The cop had stopped short
But he wasn't the sort
To admit what he ought
He could find little reason
for legal action,
So he sought another sanction
He had my father tested
by a mental doc
Who asked stupid questions
You know that crock...

His defining question,
"What would you do if
you saw a flying saucer?"
Unflinching, my father replied,
"I'd shoot it down with my
battleship!"
The doc scoffed,
"And where'd you get
your battleship?"
Quick as a whip, he replied,
"The same place you got your
flying saucer!"

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, angst, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, education, faith, farewell, funny, humorous, imagination, introspection, lonely, loss, lost, memory, pain, parody, passion, people, places, retirement, sad, science fiction, sorrow, sorry, space, star, teacher, time, travel, tribute, visionary,

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.

Poem Details | by Linda-Marie SweetHeart |
Categories: fear, funny,

Joe Willie Namath

"Joe Willie Namath" Joe Willie Namath Super Bowl famous shaved his football legs to sell pantyhose wore white mink coat on sidelines for camera pose. Broadway Joe Willie drinking booze made him silly on ESPN ..Suzie refused to be kissed captured on sports video fans booed and hissed. *For P.D.'S Clerihew Contest.

Poem Details | by Brian Strand |
Categories: childhood, funny, nostalgia, chocolate, , sweet love,

POCKET MONEY DAY

Nose pressed flat upto the glass,
Pockets tinkling full of brass;
Oblong jars,row on row
Candy -filled,to over flow.

Mintoes,chews and Pontefract cakes,
Limes and milk chocolate flakes;
Jelly beans and sweet love-hearts,
A few of each ,just to start.

Toffee whirls and butterscotch,
Long liquorice laces,all top-notch;
Aniseed balls,French bonbons,
Available now without coupons.

Sugared almonds and white mice,
Vanilla fudge,a penny a slice!
Just for starters a chocolate ice,
As it's going at half-price.

Barley sugar and a sherbert straw,
The shop bell tinkles as I close the door;
Is that th time! I'll have to skate,
Back into school,I can't be late.




Poem Details | by elizabeth alexander |
Categories: beach, funny, humorous,

Expert ****


I can tell the difference between 
horse **** and cow ****,
I can tell the difference between
sheep **** and dog ****,
turn out I'm an expert 
on all kinds of ****.


Elizabeth alexander               25/1/2016.

Poem Details | by Gary Fields |
Categories: computer-internet, funny, introspection, nostalgia,

Isch-ca-dut-a All The Way


ISH-CA-DUTA mean's that I just don't know...

*******People Spell to Literally******

*
i dnt hve aaa spl=cke
I din't kno wht tu du a
So iF u can read ths msg
Thn u neeed an spel-Ck-Tu-a

                GF



******I NEED A SPELL-CHECK RECOVERY BOTTON888_______

Poem Details | by verlecia fields |
Categories: community, dance, freedom, humorous, music, rap, song, sound, summer, urban,

Grand theft Audio

lets shout it out 
lets move it to the streets 
bang that car spanked-out speakers
to the rumble of the mass beat  
 
now bass line that big crying baby 
till it sounds
low and sweet (voice deep)

shake off all there inhibition
and bring them to the dance floor 

now let the bass sound
take you
where you want to be   

let the bass line hit you 
so you can stomp your feet   
(instrumental strong bass)

can you feel that rumble 
and you feel the beat 
bass line it up 
so you don't  
step on her feet 

  


Poem Details | by Donald Meikle |
Categories: funny, life,

Dog house ditty

A good wife
Would put the seat
Back up

Move over Rover
I did it again

Poem Details | by jan oskar hansen |
Categories: humor,

morning has broken

Morning conversation 

I get up first in the morning
Coming back to bed my wife ask
Did you?
“No, I need coffee first”
My wife gets up coming back
I ask “Did you?”
“No” 
We are talking about evacuations 
A perk when it is regular,
And you’re a pensioner.



Poem Details | by Gary Fields |
Categories: adventure, allegory, funny, health, house, house,

Situational Stress





           -------=(:-)'s...------OUCH!



You are locked down in the house and the Police
Has got the house surrounded. You need a cigarett...
This is an no smoking area...you need a cigarette...


Option: What would you do?

1. See if you can have a last smoke?

2.  See if you can maybe..bum a smoke off
     one of the cops'....

3.  Go outside and see if you can find that
     cigarett butt. The one that you left before...
     You had to dropped...running from the Police..

4.  Call the whole thing off....

5.  Quit smoking all together!

                       GF


********Thoughts' on the subject*******

You should always' think TWICE and Act once....!

Poem Details | by Ale A A |
Categories: people, miss you, sound, miss you, sound, i love you, giggle,

Picture imperfect

Smile
I miss you baby
The sound of your voice 
The way you say my name
The I love you and you are beautiful
The way you sometimes make fun of my accent 
I want to hear your laugher which makes me giggle 
The random declarations of past discretions
The fact that you think I am funny
The glimpse of your brilliance
The sound of your voice
I miss you my love
Tough

Poem Details | by Jacqueline R. Mendoza |
Categories: christian, feelings, happiness, happy, how i feel, humor, life, mother, nature, self, spiritual, world,

Me

Jacqueline R.
Simple but Elegant
Daughter of my mother
Lover of Nature, colors Green and White
Who feels sad that the world is overpowered with darkness
Depressed that people are fighting
Happy that I'm different
Who would like to see all people in one faith, loving each other and have patience over all things
Reside in Daly City, California
Mendoza

Poem Details | by jan oskar hansen |
Categories: humorous,

corrosion

Corrosion 
I live in state of decay
all around me I see metal fatigue, 
 my car will not start 
and my heart is tired of beating 
everyday 
without a rest, or and app that can 
take over for a few days.
A new battery for the car, 
but it still breaks down things fall off.
A new heart? 
Not for one who has diabetes
and is already old 
Demanding too much, scramble up the mountain of life,
and short of breath.
At the garage a man dressed in oily overall,
and a listening device in his hand
shakes his head,
Rust on the bonnet, a ulcer that can´t be spray painted. 
Give it to the scrap dealer, he says
Is he talking about me? 

Poem Details | by James Ph. Kotsybar |
Categories: funny, on writing and words,

Why Sonnets

Reckoned I’d write a bit o’ rhymin’ in the cowboy vein;
it slipped outta my lasso and I couldn’t take the rein.

So then I tries my hand at rap
But, white as sand, pheel like a sap
An’, like debates Republicanned, it was all a bunch a cr*p.

Freely versed New Yorkers’ 
obfuscated, seasonal frame; 
still the acorn froze despite the early thaw
that sighed through the Alphabet Jungle.

Minimalism
sucked.

Haiku too proved too
easily misunderstood,
or pretty petty.

Couldn’t
Conquer
Complete
Concrete.

Acrostic 
Couldn’t
Really
Offer
Something
That
I
Cherished.

Poem Details | by Atedra McGhee |
Categories: funny, imagination, teen,

Come Over

I have some words I would like to say
But I don't know which way
It's hard to put them into play
Becuz I don't know if you'll stay
if only for tonight
or maybe a day or 2 
so I'll try to make it up to you
by you letting me find something for us to do
maybe we could watch Windy the Pooh
or even Jeepers Creepers 2
well what I'm trying to say boo
is that 
i am in love with you
so sit tight 
if only for tonight 
cause i got a treat
and i promise i wont bite 

Poem Details | by jon terry |
Categories: funny, friend,

Fly Jeans

You say can we go shopping
For what is my reply
some new jeans that my friend just bought
They make her look so fly

I say lets go, do you know the store
And please don't make me choose
Before we go I'm telling you we're not shopping for shoes

I take a slow, long deep breath
As we walk in the store
Dam your friend has rich tastes
My wallet's felt this pain before

You squeeze into the fly jeans
As you turn around and say
Does my bum look big in these babe
Now I should run away

Does my bum look big in these babe
Once again I hear you ask
No it don't my darling
It's the fat around your a--

Poem Details | by elizabeth alexander |
Categories: for her, funny,

OH-DEAR

So there I am , in the kitchen
trying to make some toast,
stood ages and ages
I knew the cooker was on,
I could feel the heat
why the hells my bread not toasting ?
ahhh-no, you donkey !
I've turned the oven on , 
instead of the grill
having one of those days
oh-dear.


Elizabeth alexander                 24/1/2016

Poem Details | by Teresa Harr-Pena |
Categories: family, funny, me,

No Vacation For Me

I can't seem to take a vacation
No matter how hard I try
Boys joining the army
Girls hormones on the fly

Ford needs a tranny
Chevy needs a clutch
Mustang needs a starter
Grand Prix needs a water pump...not much

My Dodge, my baby
Now the kids use every day
I'ts keeping me here
I wanna go play

After 40 years of
Living a hectic life
In need a break f from being a mom
Being an ex-wife LOL

I guess maybe when I'm 50
I can get away
From all the things now
That are making me stay

Poem Details | by verlecia fields |
Categories: appreciation, community, education, friend, humor, internet, motivation,

Thank You For The Comment

Thank you for the comment
thanks for your interpretation
it was nice of you 
to stop-on by 
its been great 
and if you liked it 
there was no mistake 
but if you didn't 
Well! Just give me 
your best particular opinion 
I am a big girl and believe
you can't get to a higher level 
without a little assimilation     

and if you want me to 
give you a Reply
just let me know   
and I will give it 
my best amateurs' try

now, you may ask why
should i have to ask
because I am a little 
bit comment shy   

Poem Details | by Nick Dylan |
Categories: humorous, me,

Computer

With you at the beginning I was not easy,
With you now I feel good,
Now do not be sad, I know,
The computer is the same with me,
He will help me pass the time
He can show plots
Reminds me of my childhood,
But remember guys,
Do not stay too long often.

Poem Details | by Busani Zuma |
Categories: creation, destiny, devotion, emotions, how i feel, humor,

my future

 be grateful my soul you still have a chance to improve,
 life is full of ups and downs so why are complaining.
 be strong my heart after every rain there is a rain bow and that is hope.

My eyes, life is beautiful on either side
but my life will blossom
stop wondering just focus on mine.
My hands you are my tools to make my life greater than it is.
My brain you are my weapon to conquer every situation I am facing.

my feet take me to my destination, 
my heart please listen to my soul see the beauty through
my eyes and work with my brain to master everything.

Poem Details | by Troy Gamble |
Categories: lifefunny, funny, high school, drug,

I am a Funny Guy who Follows the Rules

I wonder what life is for
I hear the Foo Fighters live
I see flying cars in the future
I want to be a director
I am a funny guy who follows the rules

I pretend I am Taylor Lautner
I feel very happy with my life
I touch my driver’s license when I’m 16
I worry that I will die of early age
I cry when people screw up their lives with drugs
I am a funny guy who follows the rules

I understand the meaning of life
I say that you should believe in heaven
I dream that I will marry the love of my life
I try to do my best at school
I hope that I will make it through high school steadily
I am a funny guy who follows the rules

Poem Details | by verlecia fields |
Categories: black african american, body, family, food, hilarious, imagination, international,

Tastes Great

The best of beans
makes you tute (tutorial) gas
and fumy gas makes you learn 
that what tastes great going in 
has a smelliest price coming out