Funny Poems About Bird or Bird Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Bird poems and/or funny poems about Bird. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Bird funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Bird Poems.

Poem Details | by Jesse Rowe |
Categories: bird, food, funny,

Fatso

They said how she ate was absurd;
A "Fatso", they called her she heard,
And ever since then
That poor, baby wren
Just pecked at her food like a bird.

8.31.18
Contest: Any Animal or Creature Limerick

Poem Details | by Robert Ronnow |
Categories: bird, humor, insect, love, men, poetry, wine,

Can Poetry Matter

In the debate between accessible and difficult poems
Poets' poems and poems for people
Only the single poem and private reader matter

Both kinds and anything between can matter or not
Solid or made of air, a vase or heavy clay ashtray
One word repeated or many like a lei

An acquired taste, like wine, and like wine
Not sustenance, yet men die with their miseries
Uncut without it, news and mere matter

I advise everyone to keep a personal anthology of poems that matter
Or not. Perhaps it should be novels. Stones, insect wings,
Feathers, Birds you've seen, People loved.


Poem Details | by Gary Smith |
Categories: bird, humorous, language, pets,

Captain 'Effing' Flint

My parrots name was Captain Flint,
Boy that bird could swear.
I never invited visitors,
So blue was the air.

He'd squawk "pretty effing polly"
Or "give us a cracker you t##t"
I'd never heard such swearing,
I never taught him that.

I bought him off a sailor
Who was heading back to sea,
He said to me, "you'll love him
He's such good company."

And what he said was right
He entertained, it's true.
I said "who's a pretty boy then"
He squawked, " well not effing you !"

The profanities just got too much,
I sold him, with regret.
But the house seems so quiet now, 
Without my 'effing' pet !

Poem Details | by John Beharry |
Categories: bird, color, humor, red, sky, water,

Bird Poop In My Eye

Looking up into the sky
a bird pooped in my eye
as it was flying overhead
causing me to see red

It was warm and soggy
making me feel queasy
I scurried into the house
like an upset little mouse

I headed for the kitchen sink
and got there in a blink
Using the faucet spout
I tried to flush it out

When it was expelled
it had a funny smell
and the sink water
had a dirty colour

So when a bird is flying overhead
keep your head down instead
Do not look up into the sky
or you may get poop in your eye

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: animal, bird, humor, nature, school, tree, work,

The Nest

Have you heard
	about the bird
Who built a nest
	with zeal and zest?

With zeal and zest
	with string and straw
It was the best nest
	you ever saw.

She took her time
	and smoothed out the creases
Then out jumped a chipmunk
	who tore it to pieces.



						-1968


Poem Details | by Jackson Labaugh |
Categories: age, arabic, assonance, beach, bird, giggle, judgement,

Haiku For the Color Red

As heat bursts around,
silence lets me ponder on,
where I left my phone.

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: best friend, bird, flying, giggle, humor, humorous, sound,

Unfortunate Singer

my friend quigley likes to sing

really almost any thing

till once a high note

caused a bird to float

back down to earth less one wing.

Poem Details | by Arthur Vaso |
Categories: bird, children, hilarious,

Poetry Crimes

Little men making laws
Little men seeking flaws
Little men laughing at the meek
Little men weaker than wounded sheep

Oh little men, come ye here
I shall score and brand you till you tear
You will whimper and cry out for the savoir
All due to your immature and cruel behavior

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: conflict, humorous, relationship,

A Little Bird Told Me

Sue decided to send Jim a tweet She used words that were quite indiscreet Calling him a fat turd - (Using another word) Their romance has taken a back seat! 12~23~16

Poem Details | by Phillip Arnold |
Categories: animal, bird, flying, humanity, humorous, i am, spoken word,

Birdperson

Birdpeople, they fly. birdpeople they glide. you wont see them. they live in the trees, watching you breath and breed. Those nasty human beings. doesn't this world belong to everything?




dictated by Jason Scogin.

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: bird, humor, sleep,

Unwanted Guest

Awakened before dawn, I gasped for breath
A sound of dark foreboding breaks the still
Outside, the unrelenting, "song of death"
That soul collector, singing, " whip-poor-will" 

Before twilight, he lands high in the pine
His feathers tan and brown, his neck plumes  white
In repetitious cries that chill the spine
He calls lost souls to him before first light

And though no souls may come, he sings his song
So maddening, it makes the weary weep
His tax upon the living until dawn
The only payment he accepts is sleep

I hope the morning finds him a new tree
Someplace, far, far away, from sleeping me


   June 30-2017 
Any poem contest

Poem Details | by Kj Force |
Categories: bird, food, holiday, humor, thanksgiving,

Paying the High Price of Gas

I feel a blockage has occurred...
It must have been all that stuffing and Turkey bird...
The gurgles, the rumbling, the passing of gas...
It’s beyond my control ,Oh dear, please let this pass...
We have guests you see...
So I don’t have the privilege to just get up and flee...
No one should ever be in this state...
And I should never have put so much on my plate... 
Cause now I’m paying and to my demise ...
The rite of passage has been denied...
I feel like I may blow up and explode...
It’s times like this when you miss the commode...

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: animal, bird, farm, funny, music, silly, song,

Chicken Singing Turkey In the Straw

Buck buck buh-buck-buck
Buck buck buh-buck
Buck buck, buck buck, buck buck buck
Bucka buck bucka bucka buck
A'buck buck buck.

Buh-KAW k'buck buck
Buh-KAW k'buck
Buh-KAW k'buck buck
Buh-KAW k'buck
Buck buck buck buck
Buck buck buck
Bucka buck bucka bucka buck
A'buck buck buck.

Poem Details | by Gail Foster |
Categories: bird, heart, humor, irony, love, myth, pain,

The Gift of Eros

The Gift of Eros

Aloft flies Eros; mischief fluttered wings
With silent rustle whisper overhead
By arrows pierced; the hearts of knaves and kings
The chilly grave, the restless lover’s bed
Blue London air, red Piccadilly light
Above the shifting crowd and constant noise
In summer heat, in neon and the night
He aims his slender bow with perfect poise
Aloft flies Eros; underneath his feet
As shadows of the Circus slowly shift
I contemplate my own love, bitter, sweet
The wound that Eros wrought in me, the gift
And as I turn my tears up to the sky
A pigeon drops an arrow in my eye

by Gail

Poem Details | by Chris Hagy |
Categories: bird, funny, may, nature,

Desperate For a Date

All day long the little bird cries
Over and over again he tries
Full array for all the ladies passing by

Can't they see he's found a home
Where little babies can be grown
But he cannot do it alone

He's desperate for a date
He really needs a mate
In month of May it's not too late

On the little red house there sits a perch
Where on and off he chirps and chirps
But all the ladies only flirt

So alas this tale has but a sad end
As the little house sits with no one to attend
For it seems his services he could not lend

Poem Details | by M. L. Kiser |
Categories: animal, bird, funny, nature,

No Necking Emu

“Hi Sexy”, I said to The giant beaked black emu; The next thing I recall, Big yellow beak heading At me, full speed ahead And I quickly stepped back. Stalled claws gripped the ground; Halting bird staring; Obsidian eyes Screamed in confusion; Rejected big bird emu; Approached slowly. I held out seeds, His feelings hurt; Still, he ate them. We remained Friendly and A few more Seeds he Partook; Dined.

Poem Details | by Lycia Harding |
Categories: bird, cat, humorous, tree,

Bad Kitty - Birdie's

He listened for them, in the wood
as daylight blossomed, poised to prowl
For breakfast, breast meat sounded good 
and Cat could feel his stomach growl

Soon, struck by a cacophany
of cheeps and chirps, of coos and caws,
Cat snuck up on them, tree by tree
and hushed each cluck with teeth and claws

They, unobservant, were plucked clean
from every nook where they would sing
Think; had they looked, they might have seen
him slink toward them - and took wing! 

When Cat had eaten every bird, 
he retched a ball of beaks and feet,
then stretched out on their bones and purred,
at peace atop the spongey peet...

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: bird, cat, humorous,

Tweety Pie and Sylvester

Tweetie Pie Knows Sylvester is sly Of the cat he is wary What a clever canary! Sylvester Will seethe and fester When Tweety makes a mad dash He exclaims 'suffering succotash! Cleritoons Poetry Contest Sponsored by Joseph May 09/05/21

Poem Details | by Randy Johnson |
Categories: bird, funny, humor, humorous,

Foul Mouth Parrot

I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth.
I let him loose so that he could fly South.
But he came home again.
This proves that I can't win.
He says the F word two hundred times a day.
He offends everybody and drives them away.
Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them.
I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him.
I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner.
If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner.

(This is a fictional poem)

Poem Details | by Sonia Walker |
Categories: bird, humor, nature,

Blue Jay

blue jay in the yard
boisterous and beautiful
prima donna act



May 9, 2020

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: beach, bird, humorous, universe,

The Professor Turned To Me

The professor turned to me
       What is infinity?

     ‘Neither the stars in the sky
       nor the sand next the sea’
         thought me

     The answer, thus he:
       ‘Every thousand years
     a bird picks up a single 
       grain of sand, oh-so-wee’

     ‘And even that 
       'is not infinity'
         thus me

     ‘Jolly good!’ 
       chuckled he

Poem Details | by Joe Dimino |
Categories: bird, change, environment, fish, future, humorous, wisdom,

The Windmills of Babel

Build them wider, taller
let us reach for the sky

when we run out of bird's 
we'll clip angels on the fly

90,000 lb. sperm whale
wandering, searching for 
his misplaced tail...

but elite global outlets will 
never fail....only us commoners
stuck in the dark, our vehicles
needing, only one gear~ Park!

Poem Details | by Pat Adams |
Categories: bird, humor, nature, water,

The Waddling Vagrants

The Wellington Harbor vagrants that waddled
Removed from the sushi stand where they coddled
Were heard to say,
"That is okay,"
"For it badly needs to be remodeled"
   



New Zealand Police Detain Penguins 
New Zealand Police on Monday arrested a pair of penguins as they were caught loitering outside a sushi outlet. The birds, described as "waddling vagrants" were held near a Wellington train station as they made their way to a nearby Sushi Bi.

Poem Details | by Gary Smith |
Categories: bird, humorous,

Protesting Ducks

As I ambled around the village pond

I skimmed a stone through reed and frond,

In distress, ducks took flight

Guilty I, to cause them fright.

Protesting loudly in their quacking

My common sense seemed sadly lacking,

I never thought that stone I chucked

Would cause such grief, to little ducks.

Poem Details | by Bill Baker |
Categories: beach, bird, boy, funny, magic, miracle,

The Big Surprise

An adventurous lad named Ling,
By chance he found a talking ring.
Then a big surprise,
Right before his eyes,
It became a bird that could sing!