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Funny Poems About Blue or Blue Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Blue poems and/or funny poems about Blue. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Blue funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Blue Poems.

Poem Details | by SKAT A |
Categories: abuse, funny, husband, me,

BLACK and BLUE

BLACK and BLUE

Today I wonder, 
Wonder why?
You hit me in the eye, 
you made me cry.

My eyes are brown,
Now they're black and blue.
Is that what I get for loving you?

My lips are pink, now they're bloody red.
Is that what I get!!!
Do you wish I were dead?

My teeth are white, 
I just lost three, 
Is that what I get over a little fight? 
 
I see a smile underneath,
I see you leaving with the police.
I finally got rid of you.
I can't believe I waited, 
UNTIL I WAS BLACK AND BLUE.
        
 SK

NOTE: True story, I finally did the right thing and called the cops


Poem Details | by Francis J Grasso |
Categories: funny,

My Blue Cheese is

Pineapple pizza with pink pepperoni,
Buffalo wings and brown guacamole,
Little dead fishes in sour cream sauces,
Onions and garlic and greasy red sausage.

Cucumber sandwiches plastered with mustard,
Lemons and limes in a yucky green custard,
Fat happy chickens less all of their feathers,
Tomatoes, potatoes, my mother's hot peppers...

These are a few of my flavorless things!

Poem Details | by Rhoda Tripp |
Categories: food, funny, humor, humorous,

My Blue Cheese is

My blue cheese is Limburger and it tastes like rotten meat.
Were I to put it twixt my toes, I would have stinky feet.
I once bought a big chunk of it, there's nothing I won't try.
It was the day that I did learn, be careful what you buy.
Being the person that I am, (I think I'm heaven scent)
And not to waste, a slice I put in my foe's car air vent.
Next day I got the 'evil eye' and I was very pleased.
I was not sure what I should do, so simply uttered "Cheese".
That nasty crap I'll buy no more for I'd be really dumb.
To those who make the rancid stuff, I'd say "it tastes of bum".


Written 1/6/18
Contest:  My Blue Cheese is...
Hosted by Kevin Shaw









Poem Details | by Jim Slaughter |
Categories: blue, humorous,

Let There Be Limericks: A hint of blue

Romance in bloom
We met in a sweet garden bower,
I and that shy, blushing flower.
My excitement enlarged
When she told me she charged
By the day and not by the hour.

The sad state of the economy
Three friends, John and Jerry and Saul,
Went out looking for work in St. Paul.
John got a snow job;
Jerry a ********;
But poor Saul could get no job at all.

**** or Poetry?
A latter-day poet named Kreske
Wrote verses some thought were quite risqué.
They would never stop traffic,
Being not all that graphic,
At most they were marginally frisky.

Poem Details | by Jan Terry |
Categories: giggle, humorous, nursery rhyme,

My Blue Cheese is Peas

Baby doesn't like the 'peases'.
She spits them out, as she pleases.
I still have that childish vice
But spitting peas isn't nice.

Avoiding them is hard to do.
They're in the pot pie and the stew.
So, I pick them out one by one
But pea-picking is not fun.

Give me a break. I cannot take
To even smell them on the make.
Cold in salad or piping hot,
Hold the peas. Peas porridge, not!


January 11, 2018

For Kevin Shaw's contest





Poem Details | by William Kekaula |
Categories: analogy, appreciation, change, drink, humor, international, music,

True Blue Music Lovers

True Blue Music Lovers Eyes squeezed, ears held shut, When the Koto is plucked, and Kimono girl shrieks in league, After much sake, The Zither is fined tuned, and The Soprano is well dressed. 2019 April 29 *3rd Place* Best Sedoka - 577-577 ~~Lu Loo

Poem Details | by Sonia Walker |
Categories: bird, humor, nature,

Blue Jay

blue jay in the yard
boisterous and beautiful
prima donna act



May 9, 2020

Poem Details | by terri stiles |
Categories: animal, cheer up, humorous,

Blue Lobster

A blue lobster was saved at Red Lobster today
From the usual fate of lobster ways.
The zookeepers came and took her to the zoo
Where everyone said, “Look she’s blue”.

The other lobsters complained,
"We’re all red-we’re all the same."
And one by one, they ended up on plate
As the dinner a hungry customer ate.

So next time you feel overlooked,
Be thankful that you weren’t cooked!
To get attention, you now know what to do,
Simply dress in something blue.





Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: blue, cheer up, giggle,

- Doctor Recommendation -




Sickness comes ~ sickness goes
A warm nose ~ temperature measurement is important
You heard what the doctor said
Do not worry
You're a big boy now
Even though you're not feeling your best
I hope to see you get well soon
I know that it’s no fun 
A juicy meat bone is waiting for you
Please ~ stand still







08.02.2016
A-L Andresen :)

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: angel, beauty, blue, body, cute love, desire, feelings, giggle, girl, hello, hope, humorous, lust, relationship, romance, sexy, song, sweet, together, uplifting, woman,

Please Help Me, Re-lyric

Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.
You're just so damn sexy,
That's why I'm hittin' on you.
You don't have to love me,
Some good sex will do.
Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.

Yes, you turned me on
When I saw you walk in...
The face of an Angel,
A body just made for Sin.
Now, I may be real horny,
But one thing is true:
What would satisfy me, Girl
Would be to satisfy You.

So please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You; 
And I hope that you're fallin'
In Lust with me too;
But if not, then please fake it,
Please don't leave me "blue"...
Please help me, I've fallen
In  Lust  with  You.


Poem Details | by brittney lopez |
Categories: absence, age, angel, april, baptism, beautiful, beauty, bible, birth, blue, boat, body, books, boyfriend, bridal shower, flower, for her, forgiveness, freedom, funny, games, garden, girlfriend, goodbye, graduation, poetry, voice, wisdom, women, words, writing, youth,

Skin

You send bolts through my skin 
something I was never to 
accomplish with you, when I 
saw you it's like my heart sank 
to my stomach and I was in 
shock my body still my body 
heavy felt like when I moved I 
was about to fall to my knees 
you make me want to get 
inside my brain pick you up and 
take you out pick you one by 
one like a flower because I do 
love you and love you not.

Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: car, humor, image,

- A Blue Car Blue Day -


Are you aware of what values
and dreams that are important in life
All humans have values
Memories for life
A photograph you will never forget
In the future, grandchildren will laugh
Grandma and Grandpa forever


Respect for human actions
Freedom -  (grandpa's pants :)
Security - (grandma still inn the car :)
Courage and perseverance
Friendship and fellow human - (ready to rescue)
Confidence - (no worry :)
Humor in a tragedy










06-04- 2017
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: addiction, angst, blue, green, humorous, longing, memory,

Stoner's Lament

All those wee pot flakes
So carelessly whisked away...
Could use a joint now.

Poem Details | by farah chamma |
Categories: funny, happinessworld, sleep,

Blue Blanket

I sleep beyond its warmth
I envision upon its touch

In this world exists a hell lot of blankets
But this, ineffably, I admire very much

In shades of light blue
My blanket wraps me tight

Its color a deep, tender comfort
Resembling a departing night 

Across the wide distances of cold
I am shielded amid its warm fluff

I begin to sink in skies, as soon as
I lay my head upon its cloudy puff

In this world exists a hell lot of blankets
But this, ineffably, I admire very much

I now yearn to sleep all day
Within its magical, surreal clutch

	


Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: car, humor, political,

blue and on wheels

Can't be for an old Stanley Steamer
With Bernie my car is a screamer
With magnet en route
If you see me please toot 
It’s strategically stuck on my bimmer*


*This is the correct spelling for a BMW car or person.  Mine is a previously-owned (many times over) 3-series with 259,000 miles that we maintain.  Apologies for burning fossil fuel, but at least there is no depreciation to deal with.

Poem Details | by Julie Grenness |
Categories: blue, fantasy, friend, funny, funny love, giggle, smile,

ON FINDING NEMO

ON FINDING NEMO

Nemo is blue,  and I am a rabbit,
Comical thoughts my brain inhabit,
Thoughts invent friends imaginary,
Quite silent, tacit but delusionary,
Women's fantasies are good,
For older Red Riding Hoods alone in the woods!
Do not have a victim mentality,
Smiles are universal and free,
A concept not so imaginary.
In each person's brain, thoughts cohabit,
Nemo is blue and I am a rabbit!

Poem Details | by Mark Goodson |
Categories: funny, social, blue, blue,

Alliteration in B

The blue ball bounced against the rubber baby buggy bumper.
Bobby Brown’s bright blue blazer matched Betty’s blue bloomers.
Baseball is business blessed beyond belief.
Brook’s brother boiled beetle bugs for breakfast.
The bow of the boat blocked the big barge.
Bill’s barrel belly button bares birthday bacteria.
Baboons beam beautiful ballads for bitter berry bush butter.
Bonnie’s buttons battle the bulge.

Poem Details | by Verlena S. Walker |
Categories: blue, how i feel, humor, meaningful,

INSTRIDE

INSTRIDE My voice is shallow and cannot be heard. I see with refinement even in crepuscular. Desultory are my thoughts unraveled, But my spirit is fulfilled with exuberant joy. I drag my feet in a halcyon way. A visceral mocking and a cynical mocker I am. The snoring, as I travel on feet, was sonorous. Penumbra was beneath the trees. An opulent within his aristocratic jealousy, However, I do not speak of these things. _____________________________________| Written January 28, 2016!

Poem Details | by Brian Strand |
Categories: animals, funny, nature

PEACOCK BLUE

A
many
splendoured love-
a come hither
tail

Poem Details | by daver austin |
Categories: humor,

BLUE

BLUE 

come blessed sleep
i’ve a wish to dream no more
no more sheep
getting lost in the corn
that infernal horn

Dave Austin


Poem Details | by JACQUELYN STURGE |
Categories: funny, blue, boy,

MOTHER GOOSE' LITTLE BOY BLUE

They have poor Little Boy Blue tending sheep
That's why he got tired and fell asleep,
Other kids on the court
Shooting hoops playing sport,
He's scared of his dad and won't say a peep.


Well the cows went and eat up all the corn
And they want poor Boy Blue to blow his horn,
Why 'twas not a drum set
Or guitar, better yet,
The cows and the sheep to him would be drawn.


Didn't his parents know the Child Labor Laws
Or somebody forgot to read that clause
Protective Services
Should be called into this,
They should hire workers to meet that cause.




Poem Details | by Verlena S. Walker |
Categories: adventure, allah, anger, angst, blue, faith, humor,

TORPEDOS NAPALM

TORPEDOS’ NAPALM T remors shocked the penguins of the Arctic Circle. O rbital the water lobbed in the ocean. R otating in a circumnavigating format P enguins dangled high in the air. E stablishing that quavers do manifest in cold weather, D issolving the water into a formed ditch. O nly the vibrations remained. N uclear bodies lye in rigor mortis. A ssassinated by the bombastic troposphere. P lugger material that could be sold A s thick plastic L anguor in stillness. M issiles sent by God. ______________________________________________________| Written February 19, 2016!

Poem Details | by Donald J Bennett |
Categories: funny, old, old,

Old Blue

You see old Jake was no prude
For he always slept in the nude
T’was late one night, when just on a whim
He arose from his bed, bent down low 
Way down near the floor
T’was certainly a fright
He nearly leapt out of sight
When his old dog Blue cold nosed him

Poem Details | by Lee Leon |
Categories: allegory, animal, blue, farm, funny, recovery from, sick,

Poor Ewe

When you're a sheep and feel unwell, it's also often true
When dipped into your medicine, you come up feeling blue
Blue from your woolly noggin-lid, down to your woolly socks
And inside from your woolly brain, down to your woolly hocks

So when you are a poorly sheep, and feel in poorly form
You're gonna feel off-colour, 'cos off-colour is the norm
And both insides and outsides are tinged with shades of blue
There's only one thing left to say, and that will be, "Poor Ewe!"


Poem Details | by Tony Lane |
Categories: funny, sun,

Nothing but Blue Skies

I saw a man today who was walking with a cane, His knee would give him trouble whenever it was going to rain. On his knee’s prognostication you could place a bet, If you saw him limping by you know that you’d get wet. But if you saw him walking by with a spring in his step, There were only two reasons that could account for his pep. It could be that the sun is high and will continue shinning bright, Or it could be that he got lucky when he went to bed last night. So if you wanted to know if it was the sun or an amorous interlude, You’d have to meet up with his wife and check her attitude.