Funny Poems About Childhood or Childhood Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Childhood poems and/or funny poems about Childhood. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Childhood funny poems!

Written by Sneha Rv
Categories: child, childhood, children, christian, christmas, funny

Keeping Mum

Reindeer wait
   by the pane
I see shapes


A present!
   Santa thinks
I’m asleep 



Smells like mum 
   lent Santa 
her perfume...  ?

Written by Jacob Cra
Categories: childhood, education, children, funny, dog, dog

I Didn'T Do My Math Homework

I didn’t do my math homework!
I watched T.V instead!
I better come up with an excuse... and quick!
Or else I’m surely dead!

My brother tore it!
It’s in the garbage!
Mom says it causes brain damage!

My power was out!
I had the flu!
I was having trouble excreting my poo!

You know, why even bother?
My excuses are so lame!
I know! My dog ate my homework!
Now to find a dog I can blame...


Written by Caden Jones
Categories: childhood, funny, nature

Sandcastles

When I was a young boy,
I built a castle on the beach.
I made it from sand with my shovel-toy,
Then the waves grabbed it in their reach.
They tore my castle down,
And dragged it down into the sea.
So i took my shovel and, with a frown,
Built another castle quickly.
I built it bigger and stronger
Than the ones in the past.
I thought this one would last longer,
But its walls would no longer last.
I built a moat around the last one that day,
But the waves seemed desperate to wash them all away.

Written by Annika Johnson
Categories: child, childhood, family, humorous, sympathy, teacher

School

Why does a child have to go to school?
Why do we have to spend so much time working?
This seems simply cruel.
Isn't it just irking?

Some people say school is important for learning
Couldn't a child learn on their own?
It would cause much less yearning,
After all, we can learn from our phones.

I can somewhat see a parents point in sending their child to school.
But why would you choose what we wear?
It just allows us to look like fools,
We may as well come to school bear.

As you can see school is not fair,
So please don’t force us to go if you care.

Written by Carolyn Devonshire
Categories: childhood, funny

Eying the Babe

Ah, my brother is finally sleeping
Through my head mischievous thoughts are creeping
     It’s my time to shine now
     To him I won’t kowtow
All of the attention I’ll be keeping
 
I’ll make the best use of this special time
Beg for more after each nursery rhyme
     I’ll play with his best toys
     Till he makes the first noise
Because then I’ll just be admired part time
 

By Carolyn Devonshire
For Miranda Lambert’s Brotherly Love contest
April 23, 2011


Written by Andrea Dietrich
Categories: childhood, funny,

My Poor Stinky Love

Oh, how I loved my little teddy bear
although I don’t recall from whom he came
or when I first laid eyes on him or where;
I only know I chose for him his name.

Yes, Pinky Winky’s name was like my own,
a playful silly nickname “Andy Pandy,”
and also in his ear a bell was sewn;
I jingled him and thought he was quite dandy.

Everywhere with me went Pinky Winky
until he met sad fate with one cruel splash.
He fell into the toilet and got stinky.
I wailed when Mother threw him in the trash.

Alas! The pink imposter in his place
no jingling made nor had dear “Winky’s” face.

Written by Cheryl Hoffman
Categories: childhood, food, humor,

My Childhood Cereal

Waking up for school was hard enough,
still half asleep not ready for the bus,
breakfast on the dot,
snap, crackle and pop,
noisy Rice Krispy's helping us wake up.






12-5-16

Written by Lisa Bailey
Categories: childhood, funny, mother, son, mother,

Mother May I

Mother may I 
Go out and play
My child
Have you cleaned your room today

Are your toys packed away
in your toy chest with care
Yes mother yes 
its all in there

Did you make your bed 
like i showed you how
yes mother yes
may I go now

Yes son yes
after a brief inspection
son shakes his head
not what I was expecting

Never-mind mother
I'm going to my room
oh by the way
can you hand me the broom?

Written by L Milton Hankins
Categories: childhood, christmas, humorous,

Atlanta Santa

imagine me upon his knee a little child so meek and mild thrilled to visit our dear Santa in the heart of old Atlanta such a precocious little child thrilled to visit our dear Santa in southern Georgia warm and wild not in the least my mind beguiled in the heart of old Atlanta imagine me thrilled to visit our dear Santa a little child so meek and mild in southern Georgia warm and wild upon his knee upon his knee imagine me
THIRD PLACE WINNER written December 1, 2021 for "Meditative Ballad" poetry contest sponsored by Emile Pinet syllables checked by HMS rhymes check with Rhymezone.com

Written by William Robinson
Categories: childhood, funny, people,

Lunch Time

Ethan Alan Eaton ate an earthworm,
So, Ethan Alan's sister Sybel said.
But little Ethan Alan doesn't talk, yet; 
So he just sucked his thumb and burped, instead.

Written by Sara Kendrick
Categories: childhood, funny, life, mothermoon,

The Questioner

The moon fills from the top
Each day gets lighter, growing
How it hold the light and it not run out
The bottom just pouring

Seeing the moon in day
Up in the clear sky blue
Makes mind search for way to express
Ones' questions about you

Momma always said that
I could ask more questions
Than Philadelphia lawyer
Her.....abstentions


(My mother always said that I asked too many questions ...Very inquistive child was I....Still 
wonder.....The word abstentions means ...no do.)

Written by Rhona Mcferran
Categories: assonance, childhood, humor, humorous, silly, youth

Rainy Play Day

Slosh Sploshes
in my Galoshes
reveling in the rain

Muddle Muck
I am a Duck
and cannot be contained

Flap Slap
something Madcap
waddling soaking wet

My mother says
I am the Muddiest
thing she has ever met!

Written by Brandy Wassam
Categories: childhood, food, children, funny, horror, kindergarten

The Bear

there once was a bear
who lived in belair 
he owned a red hen
who made eggs for his kin
then one time like most bears do
the bear got hungery 
and ate the red hen 
and her last eggs of ten
with a gulp and a swallow 
down went the hen 
but wait..
now there was no hen to lay eggs for his kin.

Written by Raven Howell
Categories: appreciation, childhood, food, giggle, humor, humorous

Child's Ode To Broccoli

More nutritious
Than a bean,
I do appreciate 
Your green,
But raw,
You are extremely crunchy,
Roasted,
Just a mushy-munchy.
Steaming 
Makes you awfully wet.
Sorry -
‘Still don’t like you yet!

Written by Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
Categories: childhood, children, funny, song-lyric

Gummy Worms

Gummy Worms

Everybody likes me.
Nobody hates me.
Because I share my worms –
Yummy, yummy gummy worms
Sour and sweet yummy worms
Sitting in my kitchen, sharing worms!

(SHOUT!)
Yummy, yummy gummy worms!

Collaboration by Dane Smith-Johnsen and her 6 year old grandson
Inspired by the Childhood song, “Sittin’ in the Garden eatin’ Worms”
June 13, 2010

Written by Richard Palmer
Categories: childhood, funny,

Gugu,Gaga,Baby Talk

Huggies pull ups,size 6 to 10 months,
Crawling around, had a sudden attack,
High quality,Huggies air lock,
Bubu,bubu,back again Mr Mention,
Mummy told grandma you were overseas,
Gaga,gaga,gaga but auntie told Tony,
You got a 3 months sentence,
Dudu,dudu,pampas need changing, 
Baby wipes,dada,dada,dada,
Get rid of this strange thing,
Here comes mom,baby start smiling,
Mama,mama,mama,mama start working,
Giggle,giggle,dirty pampas off,
Uhgu,ughu,ughu,baby oil wiping,
Hands raise to heaven,new pampas on,
Tee,tee,tee,a bottle,a few gentle rocks,
Twep,twep,finger in mouth,both eyes locked,
One last sentence,bugu,lugu,bugu,
Later,gonna take a nap....

Written by J.W. Earnings
Categories: childhood, dedication, food, children, kids, funny

Cookies

Cookies are addictive!
OoOoH! Here's one to snatch!
Okay...where's the chocolate chips?
Kraving too many of these treats
I want some now! But...I might get beeefy...
Every bite is mouthwatering, soft and crisp
Should I take another cookie?

Written by Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories: allegory, childhood, family, food, children, funny

Orange You Glad To Be---An Orange---

Contract Delete

Written by Katherine Stella
Categories: childhood, education, family, fantasy, children, funny

Stuck On You

braces interlocked - told him no kissing

Written by Mark Goodson
Categories: childhood, family, fear, children, funny, life

A Mother's Discipline

With soap in hand placed in my mouth
Head hangs over toliet tongue heads south
Dirty words no more

Written by Donna Golden
Categories: childhood, funny

Footle-Marm

Miss Brown


Don't Frown

Written by David Fisher
Categories: childhood, humorous,

Long In the Tooth

I went to the Dentist to pull a tooth
And patiently sat in the waiting booth.
All the kids stared at my giant bucktooth;
Needless to say they were very uncouth.

My Dentist, who only worked on us youth,
With all her might pulled out a real shark tooth.
Honest, I’m not fooling; I’ll show you proof.
It’s the size of a great whites’, that’s the truth.

When I was done, I thought it’d be a goof
To show it to my mom, whose name is Ruth.
And don’t you know it she went through the roof,
Just like when I called her, long in the tooth.

Written by Richard Lamoureux
Categories: childhood, desire, fear, giggle, growing up,

She Is Chiclet Perfection

There is nothing better than seeing that smile!
       Her crinkled nose and effortless style
             Chiclet perfect and care free
                   The best way to be
                           Angelic
                              She
                       With her clique 
                  They just walk by me
              It appears I'm hard to see
       Still I choose to stick around a while
There is nothing better than seeing that smile!



A school boy's nightmare, occupying the space outside the friend zone.

For Andrea's new form contest.

A name for the form: Double Triangulation.

Written by Audrey Haick
Categories: childhood, children, funny

Pretty Little Ladybug

See the pretty little Ladybug
In summer she'll sit on your mug             
Pose in her polka dots                 
Delighting tiny tots
Play a tune and she may cut a rug


~*~     

Note: Nor for a contest...just fun : )

Written by Israel Curtis C.
Categories: anger, candy, childhood, emo, funny,

Candy Crush

Candy Crush!
Fired on the first day
Why 
Why
Must you be addicting
Candy Crush
Let's play again

Sweet
Fingertips 
Crushing the screen

I win!

I. Cantu