Funny Poems About Desire or Desire Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Desire poems and/or funny poems about Desire. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Desire funny poems!

Written by CayCay Jennings
Categories: crush, desire, funny, humor, ireland, sound

Irish Accents and Caps

Irish accents quake my female southland.
Males 'neath Newsboy Caps stimulate dreamland.
Irish yearns may want touch,
Did not seek to feel such.
Ireland trips could stimulate mate's backhand.

Written by Brian Morton
Categories: desire, humor, innocence, loneliness, love, science

Bottled Love Haiku

If love is a drug
my chemist doesn't have it.
Where can I find some?


Written by Xuefeng Pan
Categories: desire, first love, for her, friendship, friendship love, funny love

I Am Vaporizing In Your Eyes

I am vaporizing in your eyes slowly 
Noiselessly, clearly, and helplessly
Am I willing to be absorbed as steam?
No! my feeling is no but wordlessly

I am vaporizing in your eyes helplessly
As immediate as I saw you saw me
You turned  me into steam  softly

What should I do immediately?
Seeping into your soul completely?
Or hiding into the cloud urgently?

Written by Janice Canerdy
Categories: crazy, desire, humor,

Black Friday

I won’t shop Black Friday
because I’m not ready
to fend for my life
in a scene rough and heady.

So call me a coward!
You won’t see me fight ‘em,
and risk getting maimed
for a much-desired item.



Date: November 28, 2019
Contest Title: McWhirtle Me
Sponsor: Charles Messina

Written by CayCay Jennings
Categories: cute, desire, fruit, funny, muse, silly

Blueberries

fresh picked blueberries stimulate poetic pens ~ my muse just wants pie


Written by Aby M'Baye
Categories: africa, anxiety, desire, growth, humor, love

Feel Free

Make as you feel it 
In the sense of your feel
Without forgetting sense

Fais comme tu le sens 
Dans le sens de tes sens 
Sans oublier le sens 

Aby M.

Written by Whit Deschner
Categories: desire, destiny, food, funny, humor,

Beyond Simple

Simple Simon met a cannibal
Going to the fair...

He never made it

Written by Gershon Wolf
Categories: desire, humor, poetry, word play,

'Poem of the Day'

   My aspirations mock me
     my 'poetry's' prose

   When I 'sink' "I've 'got it now"
     ze toilet overflows 

   My metaphor's hum-drum, similes stale
     my allusions as delicate as Moby the Whale

   My plots are just schemes, so are my themes
     at night they turn dreams into screams... 

   Oh, how I wish just for once I could say ~
      I've really truly penned 'Poem of the Day'

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: body, desire, fantasy, humorous,

Fred's Foot Fetish

Fred fantasised about ladies feet Just to touch them was Fred’s secret treat When a lady reveals Her toes, ankles and heels Fred’s fixation is clearly complete! 07~12~16

Written by Reta Pruitt
Categories: desire, feelings, humor, love,

Finally

Finally we were alone
Bridesmaids; best man all gone home
We eyed the gifts piled on the rug
Bill looked at me, I gave a shrug
Tomorrow would be soon enough
Tonight we'd focus just on us
And like a flame that grew and grew
Our burning kisses did ensue
And soon our clothes were tattered rags
Phone ringing, door bell; distant nags
Somehow our room we gained at last
Observed by just the mirror glass
And though you'd like to know much more
Friend, this is where we shut the door


RETA PRUITT
August 23, 2016

Written by Shanity Rain
Categories: candy, change, desire, food, kids, funny

Sweet Carmel

The taste of homemade Carmel so sweet/ everyone I know desires the treat.

After one night in the kitchen covered/ half the pan gone, next morning discovered. 

 Is it my beagle Lily whom loves any food? / she seems in a hyper beagle mood.

 I know I heard a squeak in the night / a dream ? No, for low was the kitchen light.
           
 T'was my husband, for he can't resist/ soft , buttered brown sugar , a Vanilla twist.

Written by Robert Candler
Categories: angst, desire, humorous, irony, life, lust

Oh Well

Bill stared at a cute butt going by.
Wishing he were much bolder, he sighed,
"I would give all my pay
To roll that in the hay."
But looked up to see 'she' was a guy.

Written by Richard Lamoureux
Categories: childhood, desire, fear, giggle, growing up,

She Is Chiclet Perfection

There is nothing better than seeing that smile!
       Her crinkled nose and effortless style
             Chiclet perfect and care free
                   The best way to be
                           Angelic
                              She
                       With her clique 
                  They just walk by me
              It appears I'm hard to see
       Still I choose to stick around a while
There is nothing better than seeing that smile!



A school boy's nightmare, occupying the space outside the friend zone.

For Andrea's new form contest.

A name for the form: Double Triangulation.

Written by Mark J. Halliday
Categories: addiction, character, chocolate, desire, food, humorous

Maple Donuts

Those maple donuts
Surely will by my ruin.
Lack of self control.

Written by Mark J. Halliday
Categories: car, desire, humor, lust, nonsense, silly

Muscle Car Envy

Thou shalt not covet
Thy neighbor's wife, nor his ***...
YOU mean his Corvette?

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: desire, humorous, mum,

Enigma

All day long I dreamed of you Lying there so temptingly I couldn’t wait to hold you Just the thought of you filled me with desire I wanted you oh so badly… And then I opened that door The door that separated me from you To my horror I found you had gone You had simply vanished into thin air Lying there in your place was a note I slowly scanned the lilac paper It read … I’m sorry mum I couldn’t resist that last cream scone… I slammed the fridge door shut so hard it nearly fell off its hinges! 06~09~15 Submitted to Mystery Contest Sponsored by Nayda Ivette Negron

Written by Milan Georges Burovac
Categories: addiction, adventure, america, desire, funny love, i love you

Paris Forever

choose this sun
you will have the body
I will be your skin

your city elsewhere
Paris I tell to him

here with me
Paris forever

us - bread and wine
us - street and air

Paris our love

Written by Darlene Gifford
Categories: desire, god, humor, sorry, sweet,

God Knows I Ate a Cookie

From the top of my head
to the tip of my toes
there's nothing about me,
that God does not know. 

He knows I am weak,
but in Him I am strong.
And what ever I do,
He sees my rights
and He sees my wrongs.

God, You know I'm not perfect,
and this cookie I eat,
tastes so delicious,
fresh baked and sweet. 

Help me, God, to control
my diabetes today.
And give me a love
for more veggies, I pray.

(P.S., God, Can you make them taste sweet?
Like the cookies so tempting that I love to eat.)








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Written by Tammy Reams
Categories: desire, funny love, humorous, image, lust, women

Blind Sex

Some say my cousin got around
passing on his bloodline
young and wild with a strong esteem
no matter who it was

Shame his bloodline has family ties
one was his sister Jean
his Pop's found out, boy what a scene
now I know why he's blind


T Reams 3/26/2015        contest sponsored by: Nette Onclaud
                                     'Let Me Feel Your Lines    #6 bloodline

Written by Anthony Beck
Categories: art, crush, desire, engagement, funny love, humor

Art Girl

'Tis so, I adore a polychromatic Muse. She's a plethora of jolly dramatic hues. Not to bore yuh surely with rant sophomoric, But her aura is purely phantasmagoric. I hear people ask, “Am I her signif other?" But fear she might see me as only a brother. It is quite fantabulous and those sorts of things; So we, the two of us, will be looking at rings.

Written by Mark J. Halliday
Categories: age, body, desire, humorous, sensual, silly

Aging

As you get older,
Deny the reality
That everything sags!

Written by Tom Arnone
Categories: beauty, desire, humor, mythology, sensual, sexy

The Eyes of Venus

Hot raptor breath
Push goosebumps to life
On the golden-honey flesh
Of a most desired sight.

Deeply tanned and rubenesque,
Unsheathed, scented shoulders.
Arms that distill without cause to beckon
The wills of the penile-brained knights.

Wallow in her moist pink flower.
Defend with your armor that nymphet tower.
But beware, Dear Sir, should your eye slip up
Two orbs of Venus power.

Written by Arthur Vaso
Categories: desire, funny love, parody,

Fallen For Your Charms

A beauty from afar has captured my eye
Evoking so many feelings, deep inside
Very mysterious, curvy and delicious
I know I want to be, all she will need


I followed her to a nightclub by the river
I longed to know this star that shines so bright
To my surprise, a star she was, provocative songs from her sultry voice
A stranger and yet I felt so near

This woman, this angel, all my desires I seek
I leapt from my chair, no more silence, I must surely speak
Captivated, on my knees, I kissed her hand
Off with his wig, he said hello my name is Dan

Notes: Tim Smith was kinda enough to allow me to use his great poem and take it in a completely different direction!!!!! Thanks Tim

Written by Gorlum Gorlum
Categories: beach, desire, humor, lust, ocean, old

Dirty Limerick: Old Man,Part 2

Preparing his conference speech
Old man ended up on nude beach
By virtue or vise
He stuck his device
In each blowhole he could reach

Written by James Fraser
Categories: desire, fun, humorous,

Burds Or Birds

Is this contest about birds or birds Or am I in confusional absurd Are we talking about breasts Beautiful plumage their best My hand now says my sights blurred <*>