Humorous and funny Drink poems and/or funny poems about Drink. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Drink funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Drink Poems.
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
drink, humorous,
LUCIFER'S gullet was as parched as hell!
He said, "Lord, some cold HOOCH, would do me well!"
Lord said, "In thy condition,
Smoldering in perdition,
Not a snowball's chance in the place ye dwell!"
Entry for Catie Lindsey's "L&H Limericks" Contest
Took First Place in the contest.
Poem Details | by
Paloma P |
Categories:
allegory, analogy, drink, funny love, humorous, hyperbole, romance,
She was like Bordeaux,
a tall drink of spirit
He was more a hopped
pale lager like Pilsner,
both gorgeous and
super gingered flavors,
although clashing mid
respective savored aplomb,
one so refined the other
rowdy after hours,
yet they complimented
each other in the way
they blended their
drunken demeanors,
intoxicated by mere
existence of nature's
essential complexities
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
drink, humorous, nursery rhyme,
Sing a song of sickness after a barrel full of rye
Two men drank the whiskey and soon they were pie eyed
They woke up in a prison cell; their heads began to ring
Now they know the consequences too much alcohol can bring
Sadly in their drunken state they’d got into a fight
Bill gave Ted a left hook - he looked a sorry sight
When their hangovers were over they stood before the law
Each received a hefty fine and now their heads are sore!
San Woo challenged me to write a parody of her favourite nursery rhyme ... sing a song of sixpence
10~02~16
Poem Details | by
Michelo Mweetwa |
Categories:
dream, drink, funny, health, imagination, introspection,
I sip and think
I slip and sink
If drinking was building, I would have owned a pyramid
I sip and pee
I sleep at three
If drinking was studying, I would have owned a Phd
Poem Details | by
Gary Smith |
Categories:
drink, humorous, work,
A chill wind stung my cheeks
The sky was sullen gray,
I pulled my collar to my chin
And made my weary way.
Nothing too exciting then,
Just the daily grind.
Eight long hours of tedium
To stultify the mind.
Push a button, pack a box
There's targets to be hit,
Team leaders, motivators,
It's all a load of s##t.
Clocking in, clocking out
Until the weekend's here,
Then I'm off down to the pub,
To meet my good friend, beer.
Entry for
CONTEST NO 495,ANY FORM,ANY THEME,
UP TO A MAX OF 20 LINES Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Brian Strand
17/9/18. Placed 1st.
Poem Details | by
Emilia James |
Categories:
dance, drink, fun, humorous,
Night Out Pass Out
Shower
Half hour
Teeth clean
No green
Paint nails
Smudge fail
Broke nail
More fail
Cold air
Leg wear
Jeans tight
Won fight
Done in
Drink gin
Room spin
Less gin
Rave shout
Turn out
Dance moves
Bad grooves
Dance bump
With Trump
Not him
Was Jim
More drink
Cant think
I cry
Oh why?
Booze talk
Can't walk
Night gone
All worn
Go home
With gnome
Feel sick
Move quick
Pass out
Snore pout
Sleep tight
Night Night
08.09.20
Poem Details | by
Hilo Poet |
Categories:
analogy, appreciation, change, drink, humor, international, music,
True Blue Music Lovers
Eyes squeezed, ears held shut,
When the Koto is plucked, and
Kimono girl shrieks in league,
After much sake,
The Zither is fined tuned, and
The Soprano is well dressed.
2019 April 29
*3rd Place*
Best Sedoka - 577-577
~~Lu Loo
Poem Details | by
Rudolph Rinaldi |
Categories:
drink, fantasy, funny, good night, happiness,
I found myself
a good wee bottle
of 10 year old Irish whiskey
under my wee Irish down pillow
that must have been placed there
by the wee good leprechaun
tooth fairy
I could not bring myself
to hurt her wee feelings
so I opened it up
and drunk my wee Italian self
down to sleep
counting 40 pink plaid
wee Irish sheep
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
drink, humorous,
A time capsule was uncovered in Olde Boston the other day.
'Twas found in the Statehouse cornerstone, so they say.
'Twas placed there by patriots Samuel Adams and Paul Revere.
'Mongst other things found were three jugs of Samuel Adams Beer!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved
Poem Details | by
Paul Geiger |
Categories:
drink, humor, math,
When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall
Asleep. When we fall a—
sleep, we commit no sin—
When we commit no sin,
we go to heaven. So—
Adapted from a bon mot of
George Bernard Shaw
6x6 square, math/poetry
Poem Details | by
Jslambert Mister Roboto |
Categories:
bereavement, betrayal, drink, giggle, heaven, hyperbole, obituary,
Machiavelli s'been stewing
teardrops in the Soup
Stooping to new lows
for SYMPATHY
stirring chickens in the coop
Seems some folks will do anything
for what they think is fame
Swiss cheese stories for glory
Lordy! Whaddah' shame!
Reminds me of two classic movies...
"Freddie Lives" and the other is
"The Crying Game"...
but this one's very unbelievable, it ain't scary,
and it's much
MUCH more lame!~
Poem Details | by
Nigel Fox |
Categories:
humor, malayalam, science, yellow,
Vodka
That is what they drink
never water
on no account will a Commie ever drink water
and not without good reason
water that's what I'm getting at
water is the source of all life
seven tenths of this Earth's surface is water
why do you realize that 70 percent of you is water
as human beings you and I
need fresh pure water to replenish our precious bodily fluids.
are you beginning to understand
That’s why I drink only distilled water
rainwater
or pure-grain alcohol
Have you ever heard of a thing called fluoridation
do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived
the most and dangerous Communist plot we have ever had to face
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
drink, humorous,
Jack and Jill scrambled up the hill so sheer,
To fetch his dipsomaniac pa a pail of beer.
Alas, Jack stumbled creating a frothy spill.
Facing his furious pop, he blamed it all on Jill!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved
Poem Details | by
Richard Breese |
Categories:
car, confusion, drink, flower, giggle, humor, humorous,
there once was a thief from chile
who liked to drink milk with a lilly
well the judge was aghast
examining his past
but decided he was just silly.
Poem Details | by
Davontay Harris |
Categories:
blessing, chocolate, crazy, drink, funny, giggle,
Sitting at a coffee shop
I look over and see a tall glass of white milk
I go over and say… you look mighty tasty
I asked, We should go to my place for cookies sometime
A girl looks at me and says
can we make chocolate milk
I look up and say ‘’ oh I’m sorry, I was talking to the glass. ‘’
She got sad, and walked away.
I grab the glass of milk and walked behind her.
I held her hand and say
‘’ Well I can have both ‘’
It takes 2 to tango.
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
drink, humorous,
When Asher-Leigh made fudge smoothie
It’s not one that you’d want to see
It looked like baby pooh
That you’d flush down the loo
I’m certain it’s no drink for me!
A funny Limerick Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
06/03/22
Poem Details | by
Paula Goldsmith |
Categories:
cat, drink, funny, love, pets, uplifting, wine,
My cat drank my glass of wine, she can't get down the steps to dine.
Date Written: 11/14/2021
YOUR FUNNIEST COUPLET EVER Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: L MILTON HANKINS
Note: I do not have a cat. I did have cats for many years.
I do not drink. Just a funny/cute write.
Poem Details | by
Arthur Vaso |
Categories:
art, drink, friendship, humor, humorous, insect, parody,
Waiter waiter!
look!
but monsieur
you ordered a minnow soup, n'est pas?
Waiter waiter
Not one swimming
around in my soup
a brown minnow full of brown poop
I don't want minnow poop
in the soup
why look, its a bald beady eyed minnow
waiter! I swear this minnow is drunk
ah Monsieur, we give all our minnows wine
before death
Waiter now I know why Greeks
throw dishes at walls
I swear than damn minnow tried to write
a poem, what gaul!
Plato must be going mad
in his grave
Monsieur , can we offer you some Coock & Hen whiskey
to drown out this bad taste?
No comment
Poem Details | by
Duke Beaufort |
Categories:
drink, humor,
My bride and I on a pub crawl
Near a bar my brain can't recall
Mnemonic power!
I'm thinking "thorned flower"
Which spot dear Rose sells the alcohol?
Poem Details | by
Paloma P |
Categories:
allegory, drink, humor, imagery, imagination,
Intoxicated pinkish elephants
electrified in splendiferous drunkenness
surmised surrealistic playgrounds
of surround sound echoing laughter &
expansivly lit hot air balloons
merrily drifting to embrace star-dusted
skies' kaleidoscopic enchantment
ever wonder,
do intoxicated pink elephants hallucinate
the same as our own alcoholic delirium
Poem Details | by
Reynaldo Mast |
Categories:
beautiful, beauty, creation, drink, fruit, humor, humorous, wine,
Glittering Purple
So pretty it is so sweet
Fruit of history
Glittering Purple
So pretty it is so sweet
Taste of memory
Glittering Purple
So pretty it is so sweet
Drink from grape it wines
Poem Details | by
Just That Archaic Poet |
Categories:
drink, humor, wine,
Starkle, starkle, little twink,
"Who the hell are you?" I think.
I'm not under what you'd call
The alcofluence of incohol.
I'm just a little slort of sheep,
I'm not drunk like thinkle peep.
It's true: I don't know quite who is me yet,
(The drunker I stand here the longer I get!)
So give me one more fink to drill my cup,
'Cause I got all day sober to Sunday up.
*Inspired by "Spoonerisms"
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
drink, humorous, sad,
Ted got nissed as a pewt last night
Tried walking, his legs were not right
He stumbled and fell
Woke up in a cell …
He’ll be back in the pub tonight!
Submitted to Any poem not for a contest sponsored by Broken Wings
27th February 2016
Poem Details | by
Tom Cunningham |
Categories:
drink, humor, sea,
The pirates were all drinking rum and were drunk
And failed to see the treacherous rocks up ahead
There was one almighty crash and the ship sunk
And they ended up in Davy Jones locker all dead.
Written 17th August 2021.
Poem Details | by
Lisa Costigan |
Categories:
drink, funny love, humorous, violence,
Just a normal Sunday sitting on my chair
When all of sudden in walked my auntie uncle Claire
What the hell you doing barging in like that??
He said your not going fu**ing believe it? I just ran over your Cat
I said the only pussy in this house is my other half,
We played a few drinking games and i beat him at charades
He soon ad enough of that tho so i pulled out deck cards then he stared moaning reckon the games i play are hard.
Well i had enough of his lip i couldn't take no more
so rubbed his face on cheese grater and now hes bloody sore.