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Funny Poems About Hate or Hate Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Hate poems and/or funny poems about Hate. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Hate funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Hate Poems.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, love,

I LOVE TO HATE YOU

Just one look at you Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me I hate the feelings you evoke Greed Desire Lust Just want to hold you, devour you I don’t want to see you go But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box! 9th March 2015 Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton I chose Love as my theme ~awarded 1st place~


Poem Details | by Karam Misra |
Categories: confusion, funny, introspection, life, hate, hate,

No Choice!

I hate it when I'm
       told to do
This damn thing
       or that.

And I hate it
When I don't do it
And am made to
      feel a rat!

So what is it that
      I hate much more
To do or not to do?

The former is within myself
      The latter within me, too!

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, courage, freedom, funny, hate, history, home, hope, humorous, journey, life, lonely, lost, patriotic, peace, people, places, political, space, travel, visionary,

Alien-nation

One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, angst, autumn, business, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, fear, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, hate, health, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, love, on work and working, pain, parody, people, relationship, retirement, sad, satire, school, social, stress, success, sympathy, time, work,

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!

Poem Details | by Anthony Scandrick II |
Categories: angel, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, daughter, death, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, faith, fear, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, girlfriend, grief, happiness, hate, heaven, hope, humorous, imagination, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, passion, peace, relationship, romance, romantic, sorrow, sorry, stress, sympathy, uplifting, heart, hate, hate, heart,

Never Take Hate Outside

When you're hurt inside,
And there's no where to hide,
And there's no one on your side,
And it's killing your pride,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is chocking,
The heavy words never spoken,
The things that hurt you inside,
When love has died,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is gone,
From being alone,
And it beats a solemn tone,

When you're cold inside,
It's only a short ride,
Never take hate outside

Poem Details | by Robert A. Dufresne |
Categories: funny, me, hate, me,

Things That Bug Me About You

My goodness, how rude can one get?
I haven’t even finished speaking yet.
Your uncaring interruption,
has ruined my thought construction.
Now I have to put my thoughts on the shelf.
Couldn’t you see I was talking to myself ?!

And when I ask you to look for my keys,
Don’t make me beg on my knees.
I hate it when you laugh to beat the band,
Just because you see them in my hand!

And last week when I asked you to find my phone,
Your unkind remark cut me to the bone.
You said “you are losing your mind I fear.,
What’s that thing on your ear?”

It just isn’t nice, no matter how true it rings,
Accusing me of always losing things!
I just hate that quirk about you!!
Hey,.. you seen my other shoe?

Poem Details | by Monty Newman |
Categories: funny

I hate shopping

I hate shopping 
but when I go shopping
I know what I’m looking for
I go to the right store
I go to the right floor
I grab it 
they bag it
and I am out the door
Shopping is an awful chore

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: animal, food, hate, humor, humorous, hyperbole, satire,

Brussels Sprouts

Me, the contrarian, 
	hardcore vegetarian,
Would rather eat wombat snouts
	than brussels sprouts.

Poem Details | by Jackson LaBaugh |
Categories: beautiful, hate, humor, metaphor, political, sweet, world war i,

Haiku for Alphabet Soup

My alphabet soup,
it is getting very cold,
my microwave broke.

Poem Details | by ananya acharya |
Categories: books, class, conflict, hate, humor, math, science,

My dear subjects

Omg! What to write
Science, math wanna fight
You are world to many
But in you I am fazy
Science was favorite
"Was" not "is"
I don't know why
Science, math wanna fight
Welcome math
Trap of formulas
Can't remember even one
Omg! I wrote so much
Sorry my dear subjects
We cannot live together
The day will come
When I'll be in 11
We'll leave each other
I'll remember 2018
Our break-up year.

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, allegory, angst, animal, child, childhood, confusion, courage, death, dream, fear, funny, grief, hate, hope, humorous, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, memory, metaphor, mystery, nature, nostalgia, parody, passion, people, pets, philosophy, recovery from..., sad, satire, sorrow, spiritual, stress, success,

Inevitable Bear

Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?

Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”

Poem Details | by Deborah Burch |
Categories: animals, funny, hate,

Ode to Cats

Come 'ere kitty eyes so green
Tell me why you're so dang mean
Climbin' curtins and the walls
Midnight rampage through the halls
Chasin' air but never rats
You should know I hate cats!


9/24/2005~db©deborah burch

*just a note: i dont hate cats...(as long as they realize and behave as dogs)...any i have been owned by realize this and quickly learn to fetch, come, sit, no, and master the english language...as such....this kitten(now a cat) is my son's: Oliver, appropriatly named, who is the real-life version of "Garfield" in every possible way...and dearly loved :)
big hugs~deb

Poem Details | by Eve Roper |
Categories: games, humor,

Hate Thunder

Oh My,
Rain, lightning and thunder
 It just made me wonder 
Whose winning the game that thunders
I hide in my room in blunder because of the thunder
Wondering when it’s going to stop thundering
I am a coward of the thunder 
So I hunger for the thunder to slumber
I do so hate thunder

 By: Eve Roper
9-23-2014


Poem Details | by eric boddie |
Categories: anger, betrayal, corruption, funny, hate, horror, lust,

Lessons Learnt in Life

"Lessons Learnt in Life"
5.  Never trust anyone

She
Saw me
Asked for fee
Oh no, baby
I get it for free
But lust gives new degrees
Oh yes, she was so sexy
She said, "With no hands, it's messy"
That turned me on, so I guess you see
The tempting dilemma it came to be
I told her her river would become sea
She winked, walked away, that's fantasy
No latex held, seduced by three
In the morning, destiny
Now dictates burning pee
Then I had to flee
So urgently
Now agree
Boldly
Gee



I had to try this but please don't think this is true....knock on wood....lol

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: hate, humor, irony, nursery rhyme, sick, silly, sports,

Sports

Sports, sports, 
I love sports
About as much
As venereal warts.

Poem Details | by Litan Dey |
Categories: fun, funny, girl, hate, pollution,

Boring joke

I was trying to tell you something
For a long time
The word that will bore you
Maybe you got mad at me
Embarrassment
Sweating
Smiling lips
Your true and innocent heart stops me
The word is bothering me
I can not sleep
Today I must say this
Please! do not mind
I am saying this from my core feelings 
Today it is very cold!
Do not go outside! 

Poem Details | by Julia Romano |
Categories: funny, hate,

You smell like a dirty vag

I hate you so much
You smell like a dirty vag, 
Day old fish and all

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: conflict, corruption, evil, feelings, hate, humor, rude,

Shy

I'm not shy
I just think
Most people
Simply stink.

Poem Details | by Elton Camp |
Categories: funny,

What I Hate Most About Wal-Mart

What I hate Most About Wal-Mart

By Elton Camp

Wal-Mart has a severely limited selection
Its cleanliness doesn’t meet my expectation

The shopping carts are almost always unclean
If you shop there, you will know what I mean

Its restroom are filthy a big part of the time
And the pharmacy hours are nearly a crime

The garden shop plants tend to be all dried out
Auto repair doesn’t know what tires are about

The stock of ordinary items is very often depleted
And they don’t carry many things that are needed

But what I so detest because there is simply no excuse
With many employees, only two checkouts are in use


Poem Details | by Anoucheka Gangabissoon |
Categories: funny, hate, life, love,

Blatant Irony

She exists for a man only

He achieved what a man can

That of trying a trick abstractly

She easily got henned in hand!

Decisions are tough, exclaimed she aloud

Life in love is not easy 

He, a rose in hand, proud

Rose up to a plane above

She, a tender one with exalt

Thought of love as sincere admiration

Found out the abrupt truth, abomination!

Her only precious asset his inspiration

Her own body, as sexy asphalt!

Poem Details | by Michelle Born |
Categories: care, hate, humor, irony, jealousy, success, work,

The Reality





Tread lightly and always be aware

That there will always be jealousy out there,

Their whole world evolves around what they want and need

By criticizing others for their likes and not just greed,

To many haters are jealous of others success

So they are not happy and then get depressed,

Because they are lazy and don't want to work

They are to blame so they acted like jerks.


Written By: Unique Poetry 2015

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny,

After Taxes - Pet Hate

After taxes, our money's all spent.
We can't save for our own retirement.
I've got a big axe
to grind! Income tax
isn't paid by our own president!


Poem Details | by John Curtis |
Categories: humor,

I hate My Trench Coat

I have to wear a trench coat
To cover suit and tie
I hate that green old trench coat
I really cannot lie.

I hate the way it bags and sags
And flips and flaps around
The way the belt comes loose
And drags along the ground

That stupid belt just won’t stay put
No matter how it’s tied
It slips and snakes and sticks in doors
Oh that I can’t abide

When I get into my car
And make my way to work
Half the coat sticks out the door
Soaked in mud and dirt

I’m gonna ditch that green old coat
A truer wish I’ve never felt.
Maybe buy a gray or tan
Definitely without a belt. 

Poem Details | by Declan Molloy |
Categories: funny, writing,

I Hate Poetry

I Hate Poetry

I really dislike poetry
certainly and honestly do
deliberate obscurantism
damn words, don't you know 

whinging exultations
agonising extremes
low language of life
love and loss themes

free verse especially
a cop out I'd suspect
debility of mind
the dearth of intellect

why even bother
you depressive waste of time
we have all loved or lost
so cease your spurious crying

speak thee in happy note
flowers and flutter bys
warming sun on warming limbs
smiles and morning skies









Poem Details | by Nicholas Webb |
Categories: funny, happiness, me, hate, me,

Contradictions, the bane of my existence

I want fame and humility I want war and I want peace I want God and I want freedom I want freedom and enslavment I want to settle down, and keep moving I sprint home and crawl to work I'll eat my fill and then I'll starve I will kill and I will resurrect Give me extravagance and give me banality entertain me and bore me LOVE ME AND HATE ME LOVE ME AND HATE ME so I will show you my lithe desires, absurdly ensuring I will NEVER be at peace open your mouth and laugh with me laugh