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Funny Poems About Honey or Honey Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Honey poems and/or funny poems about Honey. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Honey funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Honey Poems.

Poem Details | by Sharon Gulley |
Categories: humor, me,

Honey Bee

Honey Bee Honey Bee bring
by your charm. Your sweet
warmth from your swarm.
Makes us some honey as 
sweet as a flower. Pile the
hive full in your golden tower.
Pancakes and muffins, and
French toast. A million ways to 
eat it, I think I love your sweet
honey, the most.

Honey Bee Honey Bee I hope
you will always want to be here. 
I will wait for you with my plate
and fork and a smile full of cheer.
I'll guard and protect you as you 
weave and I hope you never ever
want to leave.


Poem Details | by Bobby May |
Categories: funny,

JAN Is As Sweet As Honey

JAN writes her poems
With humor and care
She brings out laughter every where
Her humor is beyond compare

Her sounds are as sweet as honey
She makes me laugh in my tummy
She lives on an isle with men
No wonder her humor

Is so Funny

Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: funny, happiness, health

Honey Bun

There was once a man from Thomaston
He called his wife honey bun
His knee joint went out
In pain he did shout
Viagra's  no longer number one

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: food, funny,

I'm Nuts About Cheerios Honey Nuts

Cheerios Honey Nuts will grace my bowl

   Their scrumptious flavor I shall e'er extol

      No bacon and eggs for moi

         They are so humdrum and blah

            Honey Nuts set my day on cruise control

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Placed No. 8 in PD's "(LIMERICK) Your Favorite Cereal Contest" - October 2011

Poem Details | by Kenneth Fordham |
Categories: adventure, funny, introspection, science, uplifting,

A Taste Of Honey

Coffee is coffee,
Honey surprise cinnamon,
Delightful at best.

Poem Details | by Abdul Malik |
Categories: fun, funny, humor, money,

Money is Honey

When I have some money
I'll take you to the movies, honey,
We'll wine, dine and dance
To have fun, not miss a chance.

When I have some money
I'll take you on a cruise, honey,
We'll swim and sunbathe aboard
And ride a Ferrari on the road.

But until I have some money
We'll eat at McDonald's, honey,
With small soda, fries on the side,
And get home via a bus ride!



~A Brian Strand contest

"Let's have some fun" contest by Casarah Nance


Poem Details | by Christie Morris |
Categories: death, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, introspection, life, love, nature,

Relax Honey The Worms Will Play

Relax Honey... The Worms Will Play!

Oh honey one day,
We will both part;
To rot in graves,
And waste away:
Playing with worms,
And dancing with maggots,
As they climb all around.
Relax love all is well!
Soon we'll be down bellow,
Cavorting with the others, under the ground.

Poem Details | by DrJim Martin |
Categories: humorous,

Honey, I'm Home

Honey, I’m Home
Dr. James E. Martin
©January, 2014

Honey, I’ve finally come back home,
Thought I was massive but really a gnome.
I’ve wandered far and travelled much,
I’ve now lost all but this dirty comb.

I know you have lots of doubt,
Wondering what this is all about.
I know, I know, you told me so!
I’m now experiencing quite a drought.

If you could find it in your heart
To give me another brand new start
I’m sure this time you will find
I won’t be again so ready to depart.

Poem Details | by kathryn collins |
Categories: funny, day,

My Honey

This was a poetry challenge - a twisted valentine

   My Honey
(Valentine Challenge)

Dandelions and sweetbreads
are paltry proof
when all year long 
he acts aloof.

He hunts all day 
this clumsy brute
and barrels home
his horn a toot 

bloody carcass 
around his shoulders,
he bludgeoned it with a
jumbo boulder

In this black cave
I’m stuck all day
while beasts outside
devour their prey.

With my cro-magnon 
cupid’s in trouble,
no match for us,
go shoot another couple.


Happy St. Valentine’s Day  


©Kathryn McLoughlin Collins
January 25, 2012


Poem Details | by Floatingpoet CaptainMike |
Categories: funny, happiness, husband, wedding

My Honey Dooooooo List

my honey do's should be my don'ts
but for some reason I can't say I won't
"yes honey I'll change your oil"
"ok I'll bring them shrimp to a boil"

listining to your mom oh what a bore
"yes honey I'll get smokes from the store"
"ok I'll get the kids from school"
"yes I'll bring you a towl to the pool"

"no honey I won't go to the bar"
"ok I'll fix the brakes on your mom's car"
"yes I sent your mother's birthday card"
"oh god I guess I'll rake your mom's yard"

I wish I could get a little bit of proof
while I'm putting shingles on your mom's roof
"jeeze now I'm doing her plumbing in pex"
when all I want is a little bit of SEX!

by Capt. Mike!

Poem Details | by MoonBee Canady |
Categories: adventure, allegory, fantasy, funny, happiness, passion, people

' Hydraulic - Honey ... '

Hey,  Horsepower’s Runnin’
Got Your Motor Hummin’
V-8 Saying Somethin’
Icy-Roads, Don Mean Nuthin’

Got Your Winterized – Protection
… A Little Fuel – Injection
Flowing Your Direction
You Big-Rig Diesel – Action !

Valvoline – Clean …
Spark – Plugs, Packing Zing !
Cylinder’s Jumpin’
Let’s Get That Gas Pumpin’

So, Don’t Just Set There Idlin’
Let’s Watch These Miles Go Flyin’
‘Cause You’re Way Past Stallin’
Hydraulic – Honey, Got You Haulin’

Poem Details | by Brian Strand |
Categories: funny, nature, seasons

HONEY ,HONEY

Pollen
on my back,
dawn to late at night
such nectar my five yes
do sight-
buzzing
here and there-
to show I care,
tasty produce with you
I share-
in the
summer breeze
you take your ease,
whilst I'm nearly upon
my knees !


Poem Details | by connie pachecho |
Categories: humorous,

lose honey

lose honey

he saw his cards on the felt
smitten again, his heart melt
same ole story
no rising glory
he moaned at her chastity belt

connie pachecho

3/5/17

Poem Details | by Anisha Dutta |
Categories: animal, holiday, humor,

HONEY MOON TRIP


                           HONEY MOON TRIP

               Two pairs of shoes bought by Baa-Baa Black Sheep
                to wander, to run, to jump and to leap.
                     New Bride startles, stares,
                     demanding for two pairs.
                 Happy couple planned for Honey Moon Trip.

 07/31/17

  Two Pairs of Shoes Contest by John Lawless

Poem Details | by robert morley |
Categories: funny love, humorous, love,

Little Honey Bear

For my loves kisses are like honey~

So smooth, sweet and delicious~

For I'm like a little honey Bear~

Forever feeding upon them~

Poem Details | by Dalila Agtani |
Categories: funny,

HONEY

HONEY  (Tails)

Honey, be merry, be free Much December joy, enjoy. Drop me money honey bee Yum, yum, yum, FEED me!
Dalila Agtani 12/17/11 Entered in a contest Sponsor nikko palmario Contest Name H-E-A-D-S OR T-A-I-L-S!

Poem Details | by Kim Rodrigues |
Categories: funny, romantic,

honey

he called me honey
sticky drips of sweet romance
— this bee stirs me up

7/5/2018

Poem Details | by Jo Bien |
Categories: funny

honey do

my "honey-do" list is growing
there is a lot here to be done
some trim needs to repainted
my palm tree needs to be trimmed
the weeds are out of control
the pool is quite a mess
this paper isn't long enough
and I don't have a honey to do it

the garage lights have burned out
my shower could use some new grout
the bathroom toilet is running
and my car could use a tune
what is a girl to do
with all of these needs to meet
I guess I'll have to hire someone
cause I don't have a honey to do it

Poem Details | by douglas pederson |
Categories: appreciation, funny,

Honey of a ham

That was a honey of a ham dinner
All that salt won’t make you thinner
Smear on the raisin sauce
Don’t forget the salad that you toss.

Cut and boil up some string beans
Never bake them by any means
Boston bake beans goes in a crock pot
but you’ll be tooting quite a lot. 

The ham needs some clove for added taste
But don’t add salt, it’s not good for our waist
Your wife cooked this meal and added a lamb
Never tell her she’s a honey of a ham



Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: humorous, insect, nature,

Honey Help

Honey is a magical elixir,
Helping heal many a 'sick sir.'
  It helps when we have a cold,
  Puffy eyes, or runny nose.

It even helps with pain in the knee,
When mixed with cinnamon and a spot of tea.
  Just think: All this help
  From a buzzing bee!

Poem Details | by PAT Adams |
Categories: cute, fantasy, humor,

The Chile Honey Bees

Chile honey bees are buzzing
Up Across the U.S. nation
They had to stop only one time
At a local BP station

All the way up to Niagra
The falls are nice this time of year
Adding USB's to their force
They all seemed to be of good cheer

They stopped again for a concert
Sting and the BeeGees, in open air
All the way back down to Chile
Where the Honeybees hubbies were there!




Poem Details | by BRYAN NORTON |
Categories: animal, flower, humor, insect, uplifting,

Bumblebee Honey

I've never seen a Bumblebee
Lose a battle with a Snapdragon
No, not ever!
Each time they meet
That painted Prince
Pries open the jaws
And crawls inside
The mighty dragon
To steal the coveted prize. 

In fact, no brazen bromide
Can subdue that cheery bumbler
That fuzzy buzzing, dragon busting
Blossom bobbing, flower trusting
Petal popping, nectar bringing
Black and yellow, striped stinging
Pollinating, sugar sipping
Salivating, skinny dipping
fellow.

Poem Details | by Brigitte Pace |
Categories: books, child, funny, giggle, hilarious, humor, kindergarten,

WORDS SO FUNNY - BETTER THAN HONEY

If you have never read funny Stories, you are in for a treat
Read one at home or on a Giraffe in the Street
Reading funny stories are good for your Head and your Heart
You'll Laugh and Cry
Feel all your problems leave your body, Fly!
Your brain is a sponge, It soaks up words that you read
Like oxygen that makes you breathe 
Really funny words in stories jump into your head
You'll remember them when you're in or out of bed
You'll giggle cause funny words stick in your mind
Fantastic for your teeth not to grind
Words so funny
Better than Honey!


Copyright@BrigittePace2019

Poem Details | by PAT Adams |
Categories: confusion, food, humorous, word play,

Naked Wild Honey

Our list now has Naked Wild Honey
Now I'm getting that look from my wife
I'm not sure why she was so surprised
It's been on my list most of my life!

Poem Details | by Kim Rodrigues |
Categories: humor,

HONEY PLANS

nor’easter skies, contemplate,
but my honey plans
to catch a flight

almost forgets his meeting
thinking about his airplane seating

traffic not in the Bostonian plan
speeds things up all he can

he’s made his gate...ready to load
sign changes to delay in bold

another call to his spouse’s cell
after another delay...ain’t that swell

he finally arrives after midnight hour
perhaps she’s waiting with only a flower

are you kidding me, folks,
i’m quite tired...stumble off to bed,
after leaning in with a kiss.
this is wedded bliss ;)

10/17/2019