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Funny Poems About First Love or First Love Funny Poems

Humorous and funny First Love poems and/or funny poems about First Love. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious First Love funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other First Love Poems.

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: funny love,

If I Were The One For Nicola

If only I could make my way to Paris
To search the boulevards and rainy rues
I'd look to find my lonely heart an heiress
An Irish lass vacationing her muse

We'd find a quiet cafe' on the Seine
Where we could sit and share a laugh or two
By candlelight we'd toast with French champagne
Pretend that we were on our honeymoon

But how could I convince her I'm the one
To make all of her fantasies come true
She knows there's more to life than having fun
In Paris hearts get easily confused

I'd get down on one knee under the stars
Give her the paper ring off my cigar



   an original poem by Daniel Turner
      



Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: funny, love, sad,

How Long

I've never kissed a pig with my eyes closed
Nor have I ever held a hand of time
However, there was once when I proposed
But that was back when I was in my prime

I still recall how much she loved to dance
She'd laugh at me and make my face turn red
She taught me all the secrets of romance
That love was what one did, not what one said

I search the shadows for her purple hue
I take her mem'ry everywhere I go
Its smile has it's own special shade of blue
Its  taste so sweet no one could ever know

They tell me only time mends broken hearts
I wonder just how long before it starts.



   by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by Joyce Johnson |
Categories: humor, love,

Knowin how to keep em

Oh don't think that I ain't seein'
As you roll those purty eyes,'
And my man stands there a gawkin'
Like he'd won some sort of prize.

My ma taught me how to keep em
And to cut you down to size.
For there ain't no man worth havin'
Can resist my apple pies.

Poem Details | by Maurice Yvonne |
Categories: funny, funny love,

I Hope This Gives You A Good Hearty Laugh



I thought it was kind of romantic
I wasn't being a fanatic
I pulled it out in the cold
You thought that was a bit bold
I wrote it in the snow about you and me
How much I love you I wrote it with my pee

I almost froze it off - it and my left ball
Then you hurt me when you said it was too small
It's like out of the pool
It follows the same rule
Not that I expected you to drool
But you didn't need to be cruel

Now I pull it out again and what I write
Your not going to like - it might cause a fight
Not just what it says about you that is quite biting
But the fact it was your sister who did the writing





Poem Details | by JSLambert Mister ROBOTO |
Categories: allegory, fantasy, father, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, happiness, health, hope, husband, imagination, life, love, passion, people, places, romance, social, wife,

Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!

Poem Details | by Mary Nagy |
Categories: angst, daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, car,

Princess Needs A New Car

Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '

'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust! 
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.

'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much, 
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'! 

Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: crush, funny love, humorous, teacher,

Teacher's Pet

As I look back, it all seems funny now
Recalling all those awkward teen age years
I pushed the limits farther than allowed
Supposedly when young, we had no fears

Infatuation caught me with the blues
My heart was swollen by love's gentle sting
It was a crush that only left a bruise
Left by the diamond in her wedding ring

The first day I laid eyes on her, I fell
The lightning bolt she was, that shook my world
And to this day I swear I'd know her smell
Could she have read my mind, she'd likely hurled

I hated school but never missed her class
She said she loved me 'cause I made her laugh


  original poem by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by A.O. Taner |
Categories: august, beach, beautiful, cool, crush, deep, destiny, devotion, fantasy, feelings, first love, fishing, freedom, funny love, future, girlfriend, hope, i love you, i miss you, journey, joy, judgement, lost love, love, love hurts, meaningful, miracle, ocean, people, places, romance, sea, sensual, simple, spiritual, water, women, world,

Hope

Don't rush to wash off the sea salt 
drying on your skin;
the hopes it carries from other oceans,
those remain yet to be seen.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

LOVE IS BIND

poor puppet dances to the tune of her master - he’s pulling her strings! Jan Allison 9th April 2015 Contest: - Judy Konos Get Your Senryu On ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by Celeste Butler-Mendez |
Categories: funny, love

Black Magic Hearts

What underhanded monkey business 
razzle-dazzle bull is this? 
Whose double-crossing, flimflam scam, 
debauchery or hocus sham 
is wheeling dealing in romance, 
putting lovers in a trance? 

Antics, capers or witch's brew, 
enchanting hymns or shaman's stew, 
whose quackery or voodoo drink 
made Casanova stop and think 
and turned the ancient lovers cold; 
poor Romeo and nymphs of old? 

Perhaps black magic's potent gel, 
or craftiness or wicked spell, 
a clever con or master hoax, 
or just some trickster playing jokes. 
Whatever ruse that works the arts, 
mumbo jumbo seduces hearts!

Poem Details | by Dan Kearley |
Categories: funny, inspirational, love,

A Gentle Kiss

A gentle kiss, that I really must send To another true, and very dear friend Pucker up babe, it's coming your way And riding a storm, so it should be there today I licked my lips before I blew, so I know it's going to stick But with all the lightning, it might have a little kick So when it hits your lips, it might give off a little spark Now what started off as a gentle kiss, might be leaving you in the dark
*For my sweety* *Elizabeth Wesley* Love,Dannyboy 8-24-12

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, love,

I LOVE TO HATE YOU

Just one look at you Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me I hate the feelings you evoke Greed Desire Lust Just want to hold you, devour you I don’t want to see you go But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box! 9th March 2015 Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton I chose Love as my theme ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: fantasy, fun, funny, holiday, humorous, love,

I Want Peace

I want a piece of chocolate cake
Oh and a delicious piece of cherry pie
I want a piece of that place called Fort Knox
With all those pieces I could afford a lot

I want a piece of that lady over there
In her haute couture she saunters with such flair
I want a piece of the clouds in the sky
I just want it, don't ask me why!

I want some tiny peace of mind
To have some pieces left to be kind
Then I can give you a piece of  Art
A piece I promise comes straight from the heart

Poem Details | by Teppo Gren |
Categories: cute love, funny,

CUPID NAMED LYLE

CUPID NAMED LYLE

There once was a young Cupid named Lyle
who always aimed his arrow with style
with one shot straight as a dart
he hit me and pierced my heart
Aimed for a girl: he missed by a mile.


T.J Grén

6th April, 2016

Inspired by poets who write in many different forms, I've had a go at writing my first ever limerick, which is totally out of my comfort zone.

Poem Details | by MoonBee Canady |
Categories: daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, mother, nature, nostalgia, peace, people, seasons

Its Raining...

                          Its Raining…

God’s Cleansing Tool
Cloud-Concerto… How Cool !
Plop-Plop Plopping into Pothole Pools
On the Grass, Pavements and On My Own-Sweet- Fools…

who, don’t have Sense enough, to get out of the Rain…
… I think I’ll go Join Them… Again

                               Amen

Poem Details | by Anya Chebukina |
Categories: funny, love,

Basements Basements

This is just for fun..=)




In the basement of my heart
there is a basement
and in that basement there are two basements. 

You open one
and enter the basement 
only to find out there is yet another basement

That basements basement 
was light and blue
But that basements basement
was black

from basement to basement you walked 
until you couldn't anymore

The basements basements 
basements basements basements 
basements basements basements basement
of my heart.

You found my love...

Poem Details | by Robert Ronnow |
Categories: bird, humor, insect, love, men, poetry, wine,

Can poetry matter

In the debate between accessible and difficult poems
Poets' poems and poems for people
Only the single poem and private reader matter

Both kinds and anything between can matter or not
Solid or made of air, a vase or heavy clay ashtray
One word repeated or many like a lei

An acquired taste, like wine, and like wine
Not sustenance, yet men die with their miseries
Uncut without it, news and mere matter

I advise everyone to keep a personal anthology of poems that matter
Or not. Perhaps it should be novels. Stones, insect wings,
Feathers, Birds you've seen, People loved.






Poem Details | by Francis J Grasso |
Categories: fun, humorous, love,

Love Me

Leave me alone you beautified 6itch ;
Oh ghastly and ghoulish playpen of a witch.
Vases of roses are covering your deeds;
Eloquent verses describe your sick needs. 

Many come calling but none ever leave; 
Even my dumb heart now wants a reprieve.


written 04.02.2016

Poem Details | by Lewis Raynes |
Categories: beautiful, beauty, desire, humor, humorous, love, society,

She loves jewellery

She has a collection, an unusual collection, 
Of four thousand and forty two,
Colourful, shapely, dangly rings, 
From green to gold to blue,

That she wears from ears, her nose, her lips, 
The ones that are on show,
And she wears a heap in other places, 
But there I will not go,

Her arms both glitter, her legs glisten, 
Her neck’s a twinkle on display,
She’s a shiny beautiful colourful star, 
When she walks throughout the day,

From hoops, to drops, to barbell hugs, 
She loves wearing tiny rocks,
But no one can actually see her now, 
She’s become a walking jewellery box.


Poem Details | by SKAT A |
Categories: adventure, brother, fantasy, funny, funny love, giggle, girlfriend,

Monkey See

Monkey See~

There once was a monkey named Frank
Who loved to walk the plank
He said too many jokes
Pulled too many hoaxe-s 
Ha! Ha! Ha! Then he got a good spank

*

Who's that monkey in front of me
I dare to hang with you on a tree
Oh! What I do? Will you do?
Together we are like glue
Is that my flea or your flea?

~ Skat ~

Contest~


Poem Details | by Brenda Meier-Hans |
Categories: happy, humorous, love, silly,

Welcome to my Bio

Brenda Gail 
I am Compassionate, love and breathe poetry, humorous and a peace maker.
Sister of Patti Lynne, Paul, David and Beth.
I love children (more), I love to sing in a choir and have a song for just about everything. I love to make others happy.
I feel loved, appreciated and very blessed.
I fear not being healthy enough to make it to my son’s wedding, getting sick this winter and losing my mom.
I’d love to be able to travel again, walk around a mall, and would love to be in a poetry slam.
Living in the GTA Greater Toronto Area, Ontario.
Meier-Hans 

Written by Brenda Meier-Hans 
10.13.2014
Regina Riddles Contest: Bio Poems
1st

Poem Details | by Sharon De Fazio |
Categories: cute love, funny love, i miss you, joy, love, simile, teen,

I miss you

I miss you, 
like the sky misses the stars.
like the streets when there are no cars.
like a government that has no laws,
like music, when it is on pause.

I miss you,
like the desert misses the rain
like an addict without cocaine, 
like a kiss that misses lips
like actors without their scripts.

Poem Details | by rob carmack |
Categories: animal, best friend, dog, humorous, love, pets, thanks,

Sonnet Chiweenie Boo

Your dad, a Dachshund once stuck in Chihuahua.
The best of both in you, with that expectant
Confusing carpets for the lawn enigma.
I know….the raining….getting wet….you can’t.

As coldness chills the room, a sheet for you.
The perfect tucking of in, but you moved!
I ponder, just how crazy is my Boo?
The sheet’s thread count too low to be approved?

Your dance in circles, spinning on the floor.
Rewards and treasures known upon the racks.
Induced by meals and that one pantry door.   
In such a fury, choking on the snacks.

I know what God’s book says, I’ve searched it whole.
But still, I hope you have a little soul.

11.14.14

Poem Details | by Laura Hannan |
Categories: funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, love, parody, passion, teen,

A Brutally Honest Valentine's

My darling enigma, my dove   
You’re the epitome of my love
Your smile shines at me pearly white      
Pale skin shines and glints in the light       
Silken locks, obsidian flow
Eyes just like ice, crystalline glow        
Peals of laughter ring like a bell            
Enchant me; I’m under your spell    
You walk with a musical flow
Tiptoeing with softness through snow

But, alas, you open your mouth
Utter tripe spilling out
If only you’d keep your mouth shut.

(Love from Anonymous) 

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: beauty, cute love, grave, humor, obituary,

I Found a Girlfriend

Took me the breath of all my life
A soul mate who could consume my heart wither a smile
I found that Gothic girl after dark
A little to late to consummate
I lie in waiting with a dead round smile
Empty eyes and a lot of guile
I found a girlfriend even if late
We lie together
Frigid is our state