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Funny Poems About Lust or Lust Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Lust poems and/or funny poems about Lust. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Lust funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Lust Poems.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, lust, natural disasters,

OOPS - IT'S A BIT OF A **** UP

Ted enjoys a quick roll in the hay... He’s sleeping with his buxom P A She confirmed she’s with child Ted baulked, then got quite riled I wonder what his wife’s got to say! 5/26/18


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, humorous, lust, political,

RONALD LIKES A NICE BIT OF RUMP

A politician called Ronald Dump Loves to pat pretty girls on the rump At a peachy pert tush All his brains turn to mush His wife floors him – you should see the lump! Fictional write for fun 7th June 2016

Poem Details | by Katherine Braithwaite |
Categories: humorous, lost love, lust,

Yet another lover

When yet another lover flees my cat sized bed
and leaves me wild and comely in the night
I wonder if it's unknown words I've read
Or is it that my eyes have taken flight?

I tempt the sin with all my female parts.
They feel I'm like a spider with a bat,
to cure ,devour,digest my ghoulish pests,
They think they should be learning on the sat.

But some who mind me feel they have been robbed.
I give them all detention,I'm a liar.
I give them generous fare and sing sheeps' songs.
I give them comfort like a hellish fire

Oh,come back ,bad boy ,don't desert me yet,
The clothes I thrashed for you are not quite set.

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: funny, giggle, humor, lust, passion, sexy, woman,

Jan's Halloween Dream

Jan's spouse said she's gilding the lilies
For treating herself to new frillies
All the neighbours got hot
When they saw what she bought
And that really gave Jan the willies!

Poem Details | by Line Gauthier |
Categories: funny, grandparents, longing, lust, night, nostalgia, silly,

IMPURE THOUGHTS



On her nightdress candlelight flickers
While underneath she wears blue knickers
Grandpa recalls Kentucky
The last time he got lucky
Grandma just rolls her eyes and snickers



May 19, 2019
9-9-7-7-9
for Tania Kitchin's Bawdy Limericks Contest

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, lust,

HOT LOVE


You may be getting on in years but several times a day I reach out to caress you of course, I know all the right buttons to press to get you going As the temperature rises you start to get so steamy When you reach boiling point I hear you whistle, Gee, I can’t wait to get my hands on you I rush over to grab you Oh man, you are so darn hot as I lift you up hot fluid comes gushing out Even after all these years you’re still the one to quench my desires - how I love my old kettle! Metaphor of Love Poetry Contest Sponsored by Bobby May 11/12/19

Poem Details | by CayCay Jennings |
Categories: body, boyfriend, clothes, funny, hurt, lust, men,

My Pinged Pong


My eager man bought me a wee thong which I put on to best get along but rubbing bugging attacks soon whacked my fore and aft crack. My pinged pong found his dingdonged thong wrong.
... CayCay August 7, 2019

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: lust,

Gig giggle

Les Dewett was a gigilo
Who loved to do it really slow
Though he was well hung
The tip of his tongue
Won their praises for Best of Show

Poem Details | by Cona Adams |
Categories: animal, emotions, humorous, hyperbole, lost love, lust,

Of Lust and Dissipation

A Spenserian Sonnet
(Mr. Snake falls in love with a garden hose)

Today I slithered up a grassy hill,
wet from the creek and eager to explore.
The urge to snare a mate devoured my will,
could not this be the day for me to score?

I spot you there beside the garden door, 
your slick green shape pervades my hungry sight.
Your golden head criss-cross my eyes before
your trim tight coil peals visions of delight.

Yet when I push my moves into the light
your body squirms and grows before my eyes,
and dread arises in a burst of fright.
You spit at me in angry spurts, surprise

me with a gush of clear and liquid spray,
while I make haste to scuttle fast away.

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: angst, desire, humorous, irony, life, lust, sorrow,

Oh Well

Bill stared at a cute butt going by.
Wishing he were much bolder, he sighed,
"I would give all my pay
To roll that in the hay."
But looked up to see 'she' was a guy.

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: angel, beauty, blue, body, cute love, desire, feelings, giggle, girl, hello, hope, humorous, lust, relationship, romance, sexy, song, sweet, together, uplifting, woman,

Please Help Me, Re-lyric

Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.
You're just so damn sexy,
That's why I'm hittin' on you.
You don't have to love me,
Some good sex will do.
Please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You.

Yes, you turned me on
When I saw you walk in...
The face of an Angel,
A body just made for Sin.
Now, I may be real horny,
But one thing is true:
What would satisfy me, Girl
Would be to satisfy You.

So please help me, I've fallen
In Lust with You; 
And I hope that you're fallin'
In Lust with me too;
But if not, then please fake it,
Please don't leave me "blue"...
Please help me, I've fallen
In  Lust  with  You.


Poem Details | by Mark J. Halliday |
Categories: car, desire, humor, lust, nonsense, silly, wife,

Muscle Car Envy

Thou shalt not covet
Thy neighbor's wife, nor his ***...
YOU mean his Corvette?

Poem Details | by Mark J. Halliday |
Categories: devotion, giggle, love, lust, sexy, song, trust,

unnamed song's sexy chorus

Snuggling and cuddling,
Caressing and fondling,
And all those other tender things
That happen in the night.
Teasing and tickling,
Sighing and giggling,
And so much profound feeling
When we hold each other tight.

Poem Details | by Ngoc Nguyen |
Categories: friend, friendship, humor, irony, life, lust, relationship,

''When Best Friends Are Tempted'': an Honest Look at Modern Relationships

A woman friend, of gorgeous pulchritude,
presents a man with an experience
of tantalizingly erotic mood:—
to him it is a most pleasant "hindrance."
A guy friend of strong, chiseled, sexy good looks
makes a woman self-conscious, and confused,
when reading, "Fifty Shades of Grey" (soft-**** books),
and thinking of him while fully aroused. 
They both may think of the possibilities,
and then wonder: "What can it hurt...if I cross 
that line?" But is it worth the realities
and risks (and the very real, potential loss
     of a friendship)? Best friends may be real fine,
     but is it worth a hay roll (on Cloud Nine)?








Poem Details | by Keith Trestrail |
Categories: dance, funny, lust,

Romance in Durango

 We met south of the border in Durango,
 She was hot and boy could she fandango!
   She said at a glance
  "Señor like to dance?"
 No I replied...but I would love to tango!



               September 2014



Poem Details | by TAMMY REAMS |
Categories: desire, funny love, humorous, image, lust, women,

Blind Sex

Some say my cousin got around
passing on his bloodline
young and wild with a strong esteem
no matter who it was

Shame his bloodline has family ties
one was his sister Jean
his Pop's found out, boy what a scene
now I know why he's blind


T Reams 3/26/2015        contest sponsored by: Nette Onclaud
                                     'Let Me Feel Your Lines    #6 bloodline

Poem Details | by RUDOLPH RINALDI |
Categories: funny love, humor, humorous, life, lust,

****-a-doodle-doo

young chicks
become
old hens

young cocks
become 
old dreamers 
remembering

****-a-doodle-doo

****-a-doodle-doo
while the hens cluck 
in their sweat dreams

Poem Details | by Suresh Babu Palani |
Categories: beauty, cute love, desire, emotions, feelings, flower, fun, hilarious, imagery, love, lust, metaphor, nature, youth,

A secret affair

Dewdrops visit blooms
at night and leave by daybreak:
A secret affair.

Poem Details | by David Sollis |
Categories: funny, girlfriend, humor, humorous, lust, money, relationship,

Gold Digger

half his age
and nearly twice his
height
pretty as a picture
but none too bright
 
he loves her open
arms (and legs) –
his “tart”
spread-eagled on his
sports-car’s bonnet
 
she likes him for
his open mind and
open heart
but most of all –
his open wallet
 
she intends to stick
with him through
thick and thicker
and is most
“concerned” about
his dodgy ticker



you can see my
illustration &
original poem on my
blog here -

http://tap-p.com/2014/08/22/gold-digger/

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: funny, lust,

A Librarian Named Dowd

I knew a librarian named Dowd
Whom I recall was well endowed
Though when I flirted
She called me perverted
And said that I winked too loud

Poem Details | by Warner Baxter |
Categories: body, dance, funny, girl, jobs, lust, sexy,

Downtown - adult

DOWNTOWN WHERE GIRLS DANCE ON POLES FOR A PRICE THEY’LL BARE THEIR SOULS THEY’LL SIT ON YOUR LAP YOU’LL GO FAP FAP FAP UNTIL YOU LOOSE YOUR CONTROL

Poem Details | by Derrick Shane |
Categories: care, cute love, funny love, kiss, love, lust, woman,

hey cutie

Your sheer arrogance makes me giggle
Your butt does the cutest wiggle
I really hope you like me
I want to call you baby
Or maybe my little piggle.

:)

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny, lust,

Bad Luck


Poor old Dan was a bit of a schmuck
Ran out of gas in his brand new truck
Now late for his date
Boy, was she irate
No hanky panky was his bad luck



hanky panky- loosely translated as sexual activity

Poem Details | by Al Juman |
Categories: car, humor, lust, romance, sexy, sick, youth,

Said my car - Erotic


Said my car,
Beautiful,
drive me in lover boy,
Slowly, Slowly,
Owe-wee
This is so congenial. 
Let me savor every moment. 
So tight you are revving every muscle in me.
Love it!
sweating a sheen on me,
like a fresh coat of wax.
Ah, Ah, Aha-a! 
This is ecstatic,
keep me parked right here.
Don't move a squint.
Wow I am in Lovers  Lane.
I mean every car would want to park here
but this Garage is mines.
12/3/2013       © A. Juman The "said" Poet
Type In (A. Juman) For A relaxing and astonishing moment with all my POEMS

Poem Details | by Yort Watson |
Categories: feelings, for her, funny, kiss, lust, work,

Office Romance

I can tell you want to talk, but don’t know what to say
I better think of something quick, before you go away
I wonder if you think about me, when I’m out of sight
I think about you all the time and can’t get sleep at night
I want to kiss you as you stand there looking at the floor
I want to draw my office shades and have you ask for more
I could be wrong that you like me, a fate much worse than death
So I’ll just talk about the weather, until I’m out of breath