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Funny Poems About Money or Money Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Money poems and/or funny poems about Money. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Money funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Money Poems.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: funeral, humorous, money, satire,

WHERE THERE'S A WILL THERE'S A RELATIVE

They crawl out of the woodwork Shedding lots of crocodile tears Grieving for an ancient relative They’ve not visited for many years ‘Auntie Annie’ is barely warm But now you see the relations swarm Waiting for the will to be read They rub their hands with glee Hoping they will be left Lots of lovely money ‘Grieving relatives’ is rubbish!! Some are taking the mick …. These mercenary vultures simply make me sick! 28th January 2017


Poem Details | by Sidney Hall Mad Poet |
Categories: funny, me, world, me, money,

She means the world to me

I gotta crooked legged woman
With legs that go where they choose
Her lips are shaped like a beer mug
And over flowin with booze 

She means the world to me
And a freak that makes me money 

Her face is like a chocolate chip cookie
Covered in spots dots and all of that
I don't need a road map to find my way around
Just look at her face and I know where I'm at  

She means the world to me
And a freak that makes me money 

She gotta hunch back
From her boobs that sag
They look like two egg yolks 
On two kwik mart bags 

But She means the world to me
And a freak that makes me money

**Singing the Blues**

Poem Details | by cheryl hoffman |
Categories: anxiety, death, humor, money,

Death and Taxes

Now that I'm dead I can finally relax,
worry free of April 15th and filing my income tax.




3-22-17

Poem Details | by Freddie Robinson Jr. |
Categories: fun, humorous, money, parody,

ATM Terminator


Sarah Shopper!
Coupon please budget-y listen
and bankruptcy understand

That ATM Terminator is out there — 
It can’t be mall bargained with,
nor consumer reasoned with

An Automated Teller Machine 
doesn’t feel purse pity,
or cancelled check remorse
Or insolvency fear

And it absolutely 
will not cash register stop,
checkout ever!
Until you are empty pocket dead

Poem Details | by Gail DeBole |
Categories: addiction, fun, games, humor, money,

Casino Cents

Written by Gail DeBole on July 24, 2013
Updated on June 5, 2018

Pennies for the slots
Add up quicker than you thought.

What makes you feel "cool"
Could make you a monetary fool.

Oh, no...Whee!
Lost $12.50.

Won ten dollars!
Now I want to holler!

Everything is right!
Won a lot tonight!

The lights! The sounds!
The glamour all around.

Up one minute.
I am in to win it.

Down the next.
Slots become threats.

Lady next to me
Is laughing guiltily.

Her credit card is maxed
And her self-control too lax.

Know when to find the door
If you want to leave with more.

Or don’t overbet
so you don't Whee! into debt.


Poem Details | by Marycile Beer |
Categories: funny

Money Down The Drain

The wind in my hair does rearrange
              What $25
   Took thirty minutes to train

Cile Beer
August 19, 2010

Poem Details | by RUDOLPH RINALDI |
Categories: funny, money, prayer, satire,

My confession

I am led by desire
I desire this
I desire that
I desire everything 
that all my friends’ 
have and desire
because 
someone else has and desires it 

God 
I know I have no use 
for most of it
but I must have it

I desire life
but not death
for the fear of it
I desire life because 
most my friends have it and want it 
and fear death because 
most of my friends fear it

God 
when I am dead
maybe I will desire nothing
because all my dead friends 
will most likely desire nothing
and hopefully
we will most likely have no use 
for any of it

then God 
what will become of it?

Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: anger, holiday, humor, money, travel,

Vacation, Duration, Frustration, grrr

I know of a pretty New Jersey lass Who decided to vacation First Class But on the very first night Oh no! Cancelled flight What a total pain in the *** I'm sure her tomorrows will be better Or she'll surely be posting a letter If her plane don't take off soon It could be worse than High Noon She'll be angry, we'll just have to fetter When things couldn't have gotten any worse Once again she has to dip into her purse For the flight is okay But triple charges she'll pay A vacation just shouldn't be a curse .

Poem Details | by Cona Adams |
Categories: anniversary, fun, giving, green, humor, money,

Money Chain

My parents’ repeated refrain -
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
In my dreams, a lush tree grew
with leaves of high numbers,
nothing under a twenty.

On our 25th Anniversary,
our church threw
a surprise party.

After the pot-luck dinner,
a gaily wrapped gift box
sported a top slit, waving
 
a bit of green. As we pulled,
a chain of bills roped up
through the slot, coiling
ribbons of green.

I had seen “Money Trees” 
as special occasion gifts,
but for the one and only
time, we experienced the gift
of “Money in a Box.”

 

Poem Details | by Ryan Graham |
Categories: humor, money, poverty,

Broke

Here lies my wallet.
On my desk he sleeps.
His malnourished stomach’s
been empty for weeks.

No family survived him.
There is only me, 
With no way to pay off
his burial fee. 

Poem Details | by Cecilia Macfarlane |
Categories: funny, money, stress,

Charge It

I only just begun to charge
Impulsive buys are way too large
My credit card sighs
While bankbook cries
My pay cheque I need to enlarge


*So many things to buy since I bought a house, but I really am a wise shopper : )

Poem Details | by Joseph Coogan |
Categories: betrayal, food, humorous, irony, money,

An Ode to Clam Chowder

Oh, clam chowder, how I would love
You to be like the thing you claim you taste of.
You're seafood, soup, potatoes, all warm
And bubbling in a splendrous, thick liquid form.
Your amount of potatoes, though is extensive,
Because I guess that clam is just too expensive
To be present in amounts that meet my desires.
But I suppose you'd be too costly for buyers.
But aside from that, clam chowder, you're alright.
I'll probably still have some tonight.

Poem Details | by David Sollis |
Categories: funny, girlfriend, humor, humorous, lust, money, relationship,

Gold Digger

half his age
and nearly twice his
height
pretty as a picture
but none too bright
 
he loves her open
arms (and legs) –
his “tart”
spread-eagled on his
sports-car’s bonnet
 
she likes him for
his open mind and
open heart
but most of all –
his open wallet
 
she intends to stick
with him through
thick and thicker
and is most
“concerned” about
his dodgy ticker



you can see my
illustration &
original poem on my
blog here -

http://tap-p.com/2014/08/22/gold-digger/

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: funny, money,

The shortest poem I have ever written

Pay Day
Wayhayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

A Fool and His Money are Soon Parted


I slipped on a fry and hurt my back
Sue Burger King! said my lawyer Jack
I asked for big bucks
But Jack kinda sucks
Now I carry my stuff in a sack


Poem Details | by Jack Clark |
Categories: funny, hilarious, humor, humorous, money,

Where To

My payday's a monthly event
But ... ‘fore it’s here - it's been spent
… Search ever’ where
… Wonderin’ where
All that money has … went?

Poem Details | by Sneha RV |
Categories: humor, humorous, money,

Running Costs

"I ran behind a bus", said Ben,
“Saved a good five dollars again”.
“Oh fool!” dad exclaimed,
“My son, I’m ashamed”.
Chasing cabs, you could’ve saved ten!

Poem Details | by Brian Strand |
Categories: childhood, funny, nostalgia, chocolate, , sweet love,

POCKET MONEY DAY

Nose pressed flat upto the glass,
Pockets tinkling full of brass;
Oblong jars,row on row
Candy -filled,to over flow.

Mintoes,chews and Pontefract cakes,
Limes and milk chocolate flakes;
Jelly beans and sweet love-hearts,
A few of each ,just to start.

Toffee whirls and butterscotch,
Long liquorice laces,all top-notch;
Aniseed balls,French bonbons,
Available now without coupons.

Sugared almonds and white mice,
Vanilla fudge,a penny a slice!
Just for starters a chocolate ice,
As it's going at half-price.

Barley sugar and a sherbert straw,
The shop bell tinkles as I close the door;
Is that th time! I'll have to skate,
Back into school,I can't be late.




Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: funny, sad

Money Not Love

Went to Wal-Mart to buy a Christmas ham
All I could find was a giant traffic jam
Near the toys__decorations
By my calculations
Come day after Christmas, dumpsters see cram

Poem Details | by Sam Ruby |
Categories: adventure, angel, angst, art, beautiful, black african american, business, butterfly, caregiving, christian, confusion, courage, dedication, devotion, dream, faith, family, fear, freedom, funny, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, history, hope, inspirational, life, lonely, love, philosophy, spiritual, visionary, world, love, money,

I

If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.

Poem Details | by Jerry T Curtis |
Categories: adventure, allusion, anxiety, humor, money, nonsense, visionary,

***** Rich

Going To Market


I'm joining up with Trade King
Cause I'm sick of being poor
I'm sure I'll make a fortune with some luck

Then I won't have to worry
When that doe comes rolling in
And have more, than these two lousy bucks

Of course I'll need some cash
If I'm going to invest
So, it might take some time, to get rich

So, for now I'll take my two bucks 
And bet it on a nag
Or down at the dog track, on a *****


Poem Details | by Martin Kloess |
Categories: dance, funny, girlfriend, humor, money, work,

My Pole Dancer

This Pole Dancer she was with me
All other men must pay her fee
Still I must confess
My family’s stress
But Polish dance lessons aren’t free

Poem Details | by Suburban Lovechild |
Categories: business, humor, irony, life, money,

Everything has a fee

Everything has a fee,
Nothing on Earth's for free,
There is no relation,
Without compensation,
Unless it's just me versus me.

Something always involves cost,
From breathing to auto exhaust,
Imagine, people mating,
Without use of call waiting,
Millions of yen would be lost.

Even intangibles hold value,
A smile from the wind, a song on the bayou,
If you yell at your spouse,
Well, there goes the house,
The true meaning of "I do, I do".

Life is a pay-per-view event,
Due to our voyeuristic intent,
We can't cross the street,
To keep matters discrete,
All we have is fiscal repent.

(3/8/90)

Poem Details | by Jeralynn Clark |
Categories: funny

Money

Money

Can’t buy happiness
Can’t cash in on love either
Buy an umbrella

Poem Details | by Robert Heemstra |
Categories: humorous,

Money for Nothing

my mental health 
won’t bring me wealth

except on game shows
where I’m counting toes

Dire Straits sang Money for Nothing
if that’s true I would even sing