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Funny Poems About Monorhyme or Monorhyme Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Monorhyme poems and/or funny poems about Monorhyme. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Monorhyme funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Monorhyme Poems.

Poem Details | by Shane Cooper |
Categories: funny, husband, wife,

A COOKED GOOSE





When you come home late at night
Open the door and turn on the light
You had better be extremely quite
Or your goodly wife you may excite

And I'm sure she will not be polite
When she orders you out of her sight
There is no use trying to be contrite
The dog will have company overnight

Your goose is well and truly cooked alright

 


Poem Details | by Lycia Harding |
Categories: death, eulogy, funny,

I Slipped on a Teardrop

===============================

I slipped on a teardrop and landed in a laugh...

Who knew my tragic ending would have a happy half?

Please chuckle at my funeral and make my epitaph:

"I slipped on a teardrop and landed in a laugh"

===============================

Poem Details | by Cecilia Macfarlane |
Categories: friendship, funny, halloween,

Sexy Nun

Sister, sister sitting there so sweet
Looking so virtuous, acting discreet.
Any male would eagerly bow at your feet
You have no idea of your allure, you're without conceit
Are you offering up a trick or a treat?
Only then will this Halloween finally be complete
Ready your answers to God when you do meet
For nuns of your stature are becoming obsolete!


For my girlfriend who dressed up as a sexy nun.

Poem Details | by Faye Gibson |
Categories: humorous, nature,

Chocolate Pie

giving endless supply . . .
bright sun, blue sky
beauties for the eye 
bird and butterfly
fields of wild rye
in soft winds sigh
rabbits spry 
and foxes sly
preying hawk's wild cry
on eye and ear sweetly lie
all of nature's works comply

until I hear you sigh
our whole walk gone awry
feet covered in cow pie

Faye Lanham Gibson 
Copyright, October 9, 2014

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Its a Hair Affair

I can see you stop and stare
At my horrible purple hair
I declare ,life is so not fair
For I tried and tried to repair
This miserable hair affair
Some advice Id like to share
Of changing appearance be aware
 Follow directions with great care
Or you may gaze with sad despair
  ........  At a head of purple hair



Just written in jest
For the new contest

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: fantasy, humorous, pain,

I MUST GIVE UP SWINGING

I was swinging from my glass chandelier Lost my grip and landed smack on my rear Banged my head and blood poured out of my ear I screamed expletives nobody should hear! The ache in my bum was very severe Sobbing with pain I shed a salty tear An ambulance was called, it was soon here The driver said 'oh not you again dear .. you need to stay sober and keep off beer… It’s the second time you’ve done this this year'! Checked with how many syllables Contest Monorhyme Mania Sponsored by John Hamilton 08~22~16

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, integrity, music,

HE'S GOT VERBAL DIARRHOEA

Mr Bombastic So sycophantic Spins discs of plastic He’s so sarcastic - Thinks he’s fantastic! He’s on a health kick Eat prunes in aspic.... His guts turn spastic Diarrhoea quite drastic! 02/10/20 Simple silly scribbles after eating prunes for breakfast whilst listening to an 'in your face dj' on internet radio!

Poem Details | by Chantelle Anne Cooke |
Categories: animal, cat, conflict, humor,

Poetry Cats

Ah, to write
With hyper cats in sight
Who jump upon the computer in delight
I’m surprised some of my poems or comments aren’t 
Uuuuuuuulllllllllllllllll//tt
Quickly I race to print poetry grace in paw wrestling fights
Oh, wondrous sleeping cats, where I pen after midnight
Posted with promised success, my souls rises like a kite
Alas, everything is alright!

December 23rd 2018


Poem Details | by Geoffrey Brewer |
Categories: humorous,

Should I Wow You

SHOULD I WOW YOU

Should I essay to wow you I trow
That my words shall be honest I vow
No mere rhymes such as ‘How now brown cow’
But an aesthetic furrow I’ll plough

Then I’ll speak my lines if you’ll allow
As we sit in cool shade neath a bough
And you fan gentle breeze on my brow
While empyrean scene I endow

For my impudence I should kowtow
Now please pardon my lack of knowhow 
If I press my attention e’en now
You’d be right to say ‘Basta! and chao!’

But I’ll try one more time anyhow
Just dream that you are in Curaçao
Or on tropical sea in a dhow
           **********
And then wake up in Slough. Holy wow!


21 August 2019

Poem Details | by Lycia Harding |
Categories: clothes, fairy, fashion, funny, gender, humorous, identity,

I Like My Body

I like my body when it's with your clothes.
With your skirts and with your hose.
Panties, bras and stilettos -
you must let me BORROW those!
Oooh, they're tight... I don't suppose
you've got these in open toes...?


======================
07/24/2015
Lycia Harding

For the 'Complete the Line' Contest
Line 3:  ‘I like my body when it is with your..’---e.e. cummings


Poem Details | by John Trusty |
Categories: angst, childhood, funny

GETTING BACK



Here’s to the young lad named TRUSTY,

back then the girls were quite BUSTY,

no wonder his thoughts were LUSTY.

Lately, that thinking’s getting DUSTY,

cause the joint(s) is/are getting RUSTY!

*For the Monorhyme contest using every rhyme I ever heard with my name growing up.

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: funny,

Twittle Dee and Twittle Dumb

Sho' ain't no riddle
There’s no time to twiddle
So just for a diddle 
May I play and piddle
And then perhaps fiddle
Around with your middle? 

Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: funny

Pretentious (footle)

Big fool

Acts "cool"



Poem Details | by Barry Stebbings |
Categories: humor, stress,

Avoiding Stress

                    Avoiding Stress


      When consumed by lots of stresses

      And time inevitably presses.

      The lesson to be learned I guess is,

      And prevent doing more than less is,
 
      Avoid too often the use of “yess’s”.


     For those who learn the use of ‘no’,

     In confidence will surely grow.

     And when asked to do ‘so and so’

     And are told, ‘it will only take a mo …..,’

     Will have the assurance to just say, ‘No.’


       Barry Stebbings
        11/01/2016

Poem Details | by Trevor McLeod |
Categories: assonance, confusion, environment, howl, humorous, innocence, meaningful,

The Condom

I wore a condom for my mate
and said it glowed to throw my weight.
But when she asked to know it's fate
the light was on and it was late.

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: animal, funny,

Oy Vey, Another Groundhog Day

“Let go your hold
Your hands are cold
And it’s getting old
When I am un-holed
My soul’s been sold
So they can behold
That a marmot’s found gold
Since they think I’ve foretold

And cast a dark spot
Or maybe not
Coz all I got
Is a long shot
See my nerves are shot
Since I don’t know squat
And danger is fraught
If I show what is naught

Yet they still seek
Punx Phil’s mystique
And ask that I speak
But I only squeak
Then they’ll all peek
At my chubby physique
Of which they’ll critique
Plus there’s still six more weeks”


Poem Details | by kash poet |
Categories: funny, me, love, me,

A Secret Funny Tale

This is going to be a secret funny tale not told before,but now I must tell some soupers are sending me sweet soupmails as if they are in a journey with me in love rail or taking me to a love island on a sail and they are doing it constantly without fail of course they are not male but female till now they are thinking that I'm a male I think it is my name that leaves a manly trail though never did I mention that I am a male enough is enough and now I am going to unveil who those soupers are to turn their faces pale. ** Do not forget to read what Andrea Dietrich wrote in her poem "A Soup Tragedy" in reply to this poem. =====================================

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny

Footles - part 12

Samantha with Poison Ivy

Itchy
Witchy

What Mrs. Jones Wears

Better
Sweater

Meek as  Lambs

Zion’s
Lions

Liar Women’s Rights Activist

Fibber
Libber

Bickering Sister

Quibbling
Sibling

Slasher in Prison

Knifer
Lifer

Pilot Who Uses an Umbrella

Drier
Flier

60’s Icon Gone Fat

Piggy
Twiggy

An Anomaly

Quiet 
Riot

Day I Clean House

Tidy
Friday





Poem Details | by Sidney Hall Mad Poet |
Categories: funny

Soaring to Great Heights

I look up at them with a frightful awe of a stare
How the, does a chunk of metal float up there?
With a hundred or more people, it sails through the air.
When I’m in one, my tongue is always spurting out a prayer
My fingers become one with the chair
And when I get out, I curse and swear
They give me a hell of a scare
So to you who are like me, I’d thought I’d make you aware
These things can fall out of the sky, you beware
So do take care
And always remember, carry a change of underwear

Poem Details | by Larry Belt |
Categories: funny

Constipation

Without any hesitation
I must reach my destination
I don't have an explanation
No time for conversation

I'll need all my concentration
As I plan my evacuation
With just a minor complication
I'm in need of medication

I'll need all my dedication
To ignore this aggravation
But out of desperation
And hours of deprivation 

I come to the realization
That it's only constipation

Poem Details | by Marty Owens |
Categories: funny

Writing, Trying, Using Sphinx Links

Did you ever try growing minks?
Or writing poems with kinks?
With dark or colored inks?
And soft and lightened pinks?
Write messages that links,
With the Mysterious Sphinx?
Get on a boat that sinks? 
Use metals made of zinc's?
Go skating at the rinks?
"AW," you say, "That stinks!"
For that, my eye now winks!
And I'll just put a jinx,
On anyone that blinks!!!

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: funny, relationship,

The Dating Game Revisited

I told her at work I been bizzy
She got mad and threw a big hizzy
So I been in a bit of a tizzy
Tryin to fix things with Lizzy

So I say I’ll come see her again
(How many weeks has THAT been?)
If I knock on her door in chagrin
I’ll take a left hook to the chin

My God, you’re a silly damn fool!
Nothin’s changed, it’s still the same rule
So re-learn it, you stubborn old mule!
And haul yer *** back into school…



Poem Details | by Anna J Carroll |
Categories: funny,

The Deer On The Peer Of Last Year

Just sitting here
On top of a peer
Drinking a beer
Watching a deer
It is so near
I see it clear
Can't believe my ears
I heard it say rear
I shed a tear
This is my fear
Just like last year

Poem Details | by Lee Ramage |
Categories: business, funny, blue,

Business Meeting Blues

As I sit at a table surrounded by reds, I feel so inferior, blue fills my head. They spill out black and blue to all I’ve said, The air is a blend of purple-grey lead. Pink and peach flow from what I’ve read, To think I awoke from whiteness of my bed, Didn’t know egos so green would need to be fed, Frankly this meeting- well I’d rather be dead.
Written September 18, 2012 For Lisa Cooper’s contest “Tickle Me Pink”

Poem Details | by Joan Donnelly Ellis |
Categories: for him, funny love, romance,

Procrastinator



 How do you expect me to respond
 When you say I love you then you're gone
 Yes I know you're shy but how can I
 Prove my love true when away you fly
 Are you teasing and playing a game
 If that is so you should be ashamed
 Seriously if you really care
 Board the love train we've a life to share

Monorhyme
 9 syllales per line 
 Joan Donnelly Ellis March 3 2016
 Inspired by Silent One's poem ," Come A Little Closer ".