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Funny Poems About Muse or Muse Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Muse poems and/or funny poems about Muse. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Muse funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Muse Poems.

Poem Details | by Darlene Gifford |
Categories: humor, poetry, writing,

My Muse Alarm

I set my morning muse alarm for 2am.
But instead, it went off at three.
"Wake up!" he said, "It's me."

I reached for pen and paper. "Stop  
fumbling, and turn on the light," he said.
"Or, you'll never be able to read 
what I'm putting in your head."

"Why are you being so bossy?" I asked.
"Sorry," he said. "But I'm in a hurry
to get to the next poet's bed."


Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: funny, on writing and wordsme, me, muse,

A Scolding from My Muse

For Miranda Lambert’s “Inspired” contest
By Carolyn Devonshire


I wanted to write for this contest;
But my muse was staging a protest.
     “Take me to the sea,” it pled,
     “In this house, I languish, dead;
Put me in touch with nature, a forest.”

“Don’t stare at a screen, confined by walls;
Locked inside, my inspiration falls.
     Surely there’s a babbling brook
     Or a valley’s overlook.
Give me something to work with,” muse calls.

“If you fail to respond, I’ll attack
As you’re sleeping in a room black.
     Thoughts you will never recall
     Cannot upon your page fall;
Without me you’re nothing but a hack!”

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: happy, humorous, muse, poetry,

ONE HUNDRED AND ONE WORDS - FOR CONTEST

Casarah wants us to write happy That’s not an easy job My fickle muse has left me She’s turned into quite a snob She won’t let me write a poem that’s funny Not even a short limerick Now my world is dark not sunny I’m feeling a little bit sick So I’ve locked her in a cupboard She’s wailing and creating a fuss Her plans to gag me are scuppered I’ve just GOT to write humourous My capricious muse is locked away I can hear her starting to cry I’ll let her out one day That doesn’t end with a Y! Contest One hundred and one words - CHECKED WITH WORD COUNTER Sponsor Casarah Nance 31st August 2015

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: how i feel, humorous, muse, poetry,

I DREW A BLANK

I picked up my pen and tried hard to write, words simply failed me and I drew a blank. The harder I tried the worse it became Where are the syllables when I need them? Not a limerick or rhyme will appear … my muse has gone on her spring holiday - when she will return I have no idea! I’m sad, how can I enter a contest that I have little chance of placing in... Oh well, I guess its another N/A to add to my expanding collection. N/A in contest finalised on 6/2/16 05~31~16

Poem Details | by ravi kiran |
Categories: cheer up, death, hilarious, humor, humorous, journey, muse,

Ridicule with death

Is it that time?
my time to go.
do you have a warrant?
wait a while,
till the rain dials down.
Not want to ruin the suit,
need to look my best.
When I meet the under lord,
need to appear my best.
Not want to spend
my afterlife drenched.
if not
can I dry myself 
at the furnace of the hell.
what if?
I go to heaven,
can I pack 
a change of clothes?
Nothing fancy,
long robe and a halo,
may be a scarf too.
let me pack some sausages,
for the long journey ahead.
you seem clueless,
let me talk to your superior,
what is the country code? 
Is it alpha and omega?
no! they put me on hold
to a hold tone,
"Hang it up and see what tomorrow brings."

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, lost, muse, poetry,

MISSING MUSE

Has anyone seen my muse - I think she’s gone on a world cruise One where there’s plenty of booze Then she can have a long snooze! Why has she run away to sea I’m searching for her constantly I’m feeling really unhappy Please can someone help me? If you find her, please send her back Then I’ll be fine and on the right track I’ll take her out in my Cadillac And confiscate her spotty knapsack! Then my muse won’t be free to roam She will have to stay with me here at home So I won’t be left all alone to moan And I’ll write poems in a massive tome 6th February 2017

Poem Details | by Quoth TheRaven |
Categories: halloween, humor, muse,

Charlie Brown's luck

Charlie Brown got rocks
In his Halloween treat sack...
Snoopy made them friends

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, missing you, muse,

PART TIME POET


Once active, my muse has gone on strike I said come back, she said go take a hike! I tried dipping my pen in dark ink hand on brow; I’ve attempted to think I began writing a very sad sonnet - ended up with a second rate nonet! Next I thought I would write a fun verse t’was not funny it sounded quite terse Guess my muse has just drifted away I think she’s gone on a long holiday! Now abroad she is on a sojourn and I wonder when she will return Till then I’m a part time poet I’m bereft and I really know it! Part time poet Contest Sponsored by Michelle Faulkner 6/7/19

Poem Details | by Panagiota Romios |
Categories: feelings, humor, muse, poetess, writing,

PANAGIOTA'S DREAM


        Panagiota's Dream



With trepidation she picked up her pen.
Should I try this now.......or when?
Her Muse whispered in her ear!
"It's now or never, poetess, dear!"
Ah, that word "poetess" made her
divinely lightheaded.
And thus, my friends, she and her
pen are most happily wedded!


              August 7, 2020
               7:45pm PSt





               
               

Poem Details | by Newton Arach |
Categories: humor, muse,

Mind

My roaming mind
I married to a Muse; 
O, I’ve lost my life,
For, he gallops now. 



Poem Details | by Jimmi Canada |
Categories: graduation, growing up, heart, history, humor, marriage, mentor, mirror, muse, myth, spiritual, spoken word, thank you,

Walk

A bulging extremity,

a feminist integrity,

a swaggering centipede,

the cops arresting me,

my dick the right size,

the bang coming out of your eye's,

the sensitivity upon demise,

the dew and dripping from the sky's,

the eagerness of eloping,

the magnitude of doping,

the honesty of groping,

scattering scorpions glowing and scoping.

Poem Details | by Peter Dome |
Categories: change, fantasy, fun, funny, muse, silly,

If Women Rule the World

If women ruled the world
I'd have a sex change and be a girl
If you can't beat em
Join em.



Peter Dome. Copyright.2015.May.

Poem Details | by Jerry T Curtis |
Categories: allusion, funny, humor, muse, nonsense, satire, silly,

Leaking Soup

OK
Someone leaked this poem
I thought I hid it well
I didn't post on the net
and there's no one I would tell

Perhaps it's North Korea
heard they're hacking everyone
or that group they call the Lizards
just out to have some fun

Now all the time I spent 
to write it, gone to waste
All millions have to do now
is simply cut and paste

I'm sure by now, around the world
everyone has downloaded
and my pop-u-lar-i-ty
on the web, exploded

But I still have some little gems
of which I'll never let them peek
unless of course, I find the source
of how my poems leak
 

Poem Details | by Adell Foster |
Categories: fun, games, giggle, happy, imagery, imagination, muse,

THERE IS SOMETHING IN MY POCKET

There is something in my pocket…
Is it perhaps a rocket?
Oh no, that simply would not fit;
Yet, there’s something in my pocket…
Could it be a lovely locket?
Good guess, I confess that’s not it…
Could you plug it in a socket?
Oh now that sure would be shocking.
Okay I give, do tell, won’t you?
Well…There’s a poem in my pocket,
And I’ve written it just for you.

Poem Details | by Eve Roper |
Categories: cat, children, fun, funny, imagery, muse, race, space,

Can't Catch Me

Can't Catch Me

field Mouse
did rouse

house cat
fell flat

took chase
fast race

small space
broke vase

smirk tease
took cheese


10/21/2016

Poetry Contest : FIVE FABULOUS FUN FOOTLES 
 
 Sponsored by: JAN ALLISON



Poem Details | by Jesse Day |
Categories: confusion, funny, hope, muse, satire, trust, truth,

A Sweet Little Lie

I struggle to tell her this truth,
I consult with her pleasing smile.
Woe is a world where flaws exist,
As stains breed until flavors amend.
She hears me mince through fearful smarm,
Pandora hopes she leaves this peek alone.
A whim which daunts a doting kiss,
My muse weeps with this ugly breath.
If her heart breaks then mine will too,
She deserves a sweet little lie.
...........................................................
Contest Entry: A Special Secret
Sponsor: Lewis Raines

Poem Details | by João Camilo |
Categories: humorous, muse, poetry, poets,

Stuck

I know you craved for a poem
but there is a bigger problem:
I am stuck with the word seven
rhyming with the word heaven.
 
Maybe, from the spring I drank
merely poured verses in blank,
but no, an orphic power compels  
and the poem flees and rebels.
 
So this is the best gift I have,
perhaps gray like a cold grave.
You may even claim it is fine
but I will not write a new line,
 
until my muse arouse again
and poesy is set to entertain.

Poem Details | by Charlie Knowlton |
Categories: dog, funny, good morning, morning, muse, pollution,

Breakfast with my yellow lab Lucy



                          Wisping kitchen sunlight
                          with dust and wood smoke.
                          Golden hairs from her body 
                          from a shake as she woke.
                          Rising up and then falling
                          softly down as they float.
                          And brushing my oatmeal 
                          with a fresh yellow coat.

                      

                        

                           

                        

                           


Poem Details | by Dave Moore |
Categories: angst, depression, dog, funny, good morning, humor, muse,

Meditator

THE MEDITATOR

 Oh what joy it seems to be
Drinking an early morning tea.

While watching the sun rise across the Bay
Changing night into day.

My Maltese, lies stretched across my knees
Knows he's not here to play but me to please,

But, my time to meditate just went sour 
Oh God – What is the hour?

Not time to mediate
Just to contemplate.

Mistakes I've made and things I dread
How fast can I get back to bed?

One last thing so you don't get bit.
NOLI TANGERE CANEM MEAN. MORDIT !

Did I spell that right?
It means: "DON'T PAT MY DOG, HE BITES !"

Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: humorous, muse,

Muse On The Loose

My muse is on the loose in this blank page
At times I search for hours between these lines
An open notebook is an open cage
And when she leaves she's very hard to find

I try arousing her to no avail
With doodles in the margin killing time
I'll take a break, go out and check the mail
But she remains as silent as a mime

And yet I know that she will soon return
She's staring from this paper now at me
I guess you'd think by now that I should learn
When inspiration comes then there she'll be

She seems to come out when it's late at night
And always wakes me up and makes me write



    original poem by Daniel Turner


Poem Details | by Carl (Pontiak) Chong |
Categories: fantasy, humor, image, imagination, lust, muse, word play,

Tight Squeeze

I posed up and took
a good long look,
Darn it seemed so
warm that nook.
Eased forward slowly
lining up carefully,
Scared of doing
damage, I entered
warily.
Slipped in slowly as
things got a bit
wet,
Took my time, sizing
up the tightness,
Backed up a bit in
my timid
nervousness.
Proceeded on in now
as it seemed huge,
Squeezed in as the
wetness became a
deluge.
Went in deep to the
welcoming warmness,
Opened the door to
such sweet hotness.
One foot on the
floor as I leaned
over the back,
Jammed my fingers
thru the wired
racks,
Pressed all the
right buttons no
real stress,
Damn garage door was
stuck open to my
distress.

Pontiak

Poem Details | by LEWIS NYAGA |
Categories: allusion, for him, humor, humorous, muse,

THE MUSE

 ~teddy and the muse~

It looked as a monkey
With a huge bushy tail
It entered the office 
Scarring brother Teddy
It scampered allover 
Teddy offered it a banana
It screeched baring its teeth
I call it a muse for lack
Of a suitable or better name
It was a creature of the forest
Dark and very swift on its legs
Who visited teddy yes a muse
I call it a muse for teddy keeps
Churning out brilliant pieces





(for Teddy)

Poem Details | by Veronica Capo |
Categories: how i feel, humor, i love you, longing, love, love hurts, muse,

The Long Distance Dilemma

Long the distance existing between us, 
making things a little complicated, 
leaving confusion and a slight mistrust. 
And yet we both are still quite unsated. 

Thoughts are not too clear when speaking to you, 
making stupidity quite evident, 
leaving me seem worthless: annoying too. 
And yet you stay, listening to me vent. 

You make fun, picking on me constantly. 
Making me smile and laugh, you're such a goof. 
But when you joke about leaving, you see, 
I'm stuck with a fear of you gone, just poof. 

I want to be with you, if only i could. 
I love you, more than i probably should.

Poem Details | by Perry Campanella |
Categories: crazy, funny, giggle, imagination, irony, missing, muse, poetry,

Olay

There once was a lady so thin
she wanted to solve a crime
so she set at a Bar, Lounge, Inn,
only couldn't find her lime,

Try hard as she would - to remember
only made her all the more slender,
so much so - she slipped through her
straw an fell in...

Now while there - she tried to compare
her lime - now found - from her olive,
only to have swallowed her ice cube in there,
it floated her above an over her glass alive,

Now on her chair it all didn't matter
so she ordered another,
this time without a lime - an became fatter
wow, when asked to pay for this one an that other

Why she said; didn't you hear "Crime Doesn't pay"
as she melted away - Olay! >:D

Poem Details | by Larry Belt |
Categories: funny, city, muse,

The Great Muse Ruse

Deep within the city of muse
A rebellion is taking place
The pain and loss is evident
On every poet's face

A trial of sorts has just begun
To find the muse of guilt
The city itself has been torn down
The city the muse has built

The words themselves are walking around
Void of inspiration
Thinking it has to be a big mistake
There's gotta be an explanation

The muse has banned together
Demanding to know the truth
A muse is charged with plagiarism
But the courts can't find the proof

Well I just made this story up
In case your still in shock
I just needed a way to explain
Away my writer's block