Humorous and funny Nonsense poems and/or funny poems about Nonsense. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Nonsense funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Nonsense Poems.
Jerry T Curtis
food, funny, humorous, nonsense, romance, sexy, silly,
Is it Love
a simple bowl of ice cream
sweating from the heat
cherries on the top
huddled 'round and looking sweet
two little wooden paddles
pretend that they are spoons
as we sit beneath the stars
in the savor of the moon
your lips are all I see
as they caress them with a passion
the cherries on your tongue
in a delightful playful fashion
with our eyes intent and focused
in a stare of solemn trust
Is this ice cream truly love
or is it merely cherry lust
analogy, appreciation, character, destiny, children, funny, nonsense,
Me myself and I
were talking to myselve's
when we asked us a question
and they were not themselves.
They themselves and them
now questioning themselves
said we were not like them
and had to be yourselves.
You yourselve's and you
now separate from myselve's
meant you could not be me
and we could be ourselves.
funny, math, nonsense,
Pythagoras once fell off a ladder
And landed on a venomous adder
This adder couldn't add
Calculus made it sad
Algebra and theorems made it madder.
america, education, england, fun, funny, homework, nonsense,
The British call it maths,
but the Americans ditch the s
causing much international scorn.
But for our sake, p'raps it'd be best
to keep subjects
only halfway grasped
in the singular form.
addiction, funny, nonsense, simple, word play, words, writing,
(don't tell anyone)
adventure, easter, fear, funny, nonsense, religion,
He knows if you are sleeping,
He knows when you're awake,
He knows if you've been bad or good.
Zombie Jesus must be staked!
So eat your crackers and wine,
And think that you'll be saved,
But that's not why he's here because
Your brains are what he craves!
He'll never stop his rampage.
Not until he's fully fed,
But nothing satisfies his hunger
Like what rattles in your head.
He's coming down the chimney.
He's underneath your bed.
You think you can outrun him,
But soon you will be dead.
So you better not whisper,
You better not cry
Cuz even a shot between his eyes
Won't stop Zombie Jesus, tonight..
Jerry T Curtis
Lake Breaking News
Early this morning, there was a robbery
A turtle mugged a snail down by the pond
The shell the turtle jacked, was off the poor snail's back
and when he turned around, the thief was gone
He went down to the station, after much deliberation
And told the cops his story at last.
With such a keen depiction, they asked for a description
But, the snail said it happened much to fast
fun, funny, humor, humorous, nonsense, writing,
Alliteration is awesome;
thanks to thee
it effortlessly erases evidence
Written February 29th, 2016
For the Spoonerisms Contest hosted by Roy Jerden
humor, nonsense, poetry,
I am the enchanted poetry biscuit
No gravy, no butter, I look so bland
Staring at the fridge, will you risk it?
Sweep me away in your hot hands!
I’m so much more than last night’s pizza pie
Come on now, I dare you, take a bite
A radiant magic awaits inside
To quench the burn; set your soul aright
Whether you nuke me, boil me, or bake me,
I’ll satisfy your cravings the same
And like life, I’m as good as you make me
Let the flour and baking soda set you aflame!
“Poetry Biscuit” was an irresistibly compelling suggestion…
© Thomas W. Quigley
For contest: Poetry ______
Brendan J. Simons
"They call us the edibles," said a cookie to me,
Whose eyes were chocolates and chips,
"Your mom shaped us into people, as you see,
And now sound comes from our liquorice lips!"
"Yeah, and it seems my lips are liquor-ish as well,"
I said to myself and not to the dessert,
Whom I tossed up and when he into my mouth fell,
Began screaming, "Is this what I deserve?!"
I quickly pulled him out of my mouth and when,
Asked why and how he had just spake,
He responded to that right there and then,
"Because like you, we had just got baked."
children, funny, life,
One cold day, I was burning up
The rain outside was dry
The sunshine, mooned each falling star
Out there, inside was I
Reading, when I'm fast asleep
I saw no movement stand
I reached without and outstretched arm
to flick the fly that land
Bouncing, being very still
I thought it lively, dying
When up it sprang, just flatly
All it's energy, spent trying
Salt I sprinkled, as it poured
Atop, the underneath, it's belly
Finally flopping, to and fro
Then landing in my jelly
funny, humor, nonsense, silly,
Today, I got into a Polite Fight
Over the last Wonder Woman night-light
"Oh, its yours," I insisted,
She demurred, I resisted,
Until I gave in and let her be right!
food, funny, nonsense, science fiction,
Lurking in fuzzy leftovers is seen
A quivering, crawling hairball of green
A florescent prune
Or cheese from the moon
Gurgles gastric, plastic alien spleen
The miser squire requires gluts of caffeine
To dissect this science project's gangrene
Harpoon on a spoon
Zoom to the saloon
Lunch ladies' supreme mystery cuisine.
For Green Humor contest
Sponsor: Carolyn Devonshire
funny, humorous, nonsense, word play,
Way down in East Jabib
where I told many a fib
I spoke so many lies
it should be no surprise
that I used to lie in my crib
It was the young man's pleasure
to dig for buried treasure
with shovel in hand
he suddenly planned
to dynamite, just for good measure
funny, humorous, nonsense,
My thumbs ran off today.
I knew they were in love
And I suspected they might be compelled to be alone, together.
It makes opening cans rather tough.
Turning the key in the ignition is nigh onto impossible.
I had trouble picking up my fork for my eggs.
But do they care?
They are selfishly in love, those two.
Gone away on a clandestine holiday.
Thank goodness I have an I-phone instead of a rotary one.
I do not even have to use my thumbs to hold it down while I dial.
They are in the next room, moaning and stuff.
Like newlyweds do. I hate to disturb them,
So here I sit, twiddling nothing.
animal, art, humorous, nonsense, silly, smart, word play,
Her name was Gwen
and she was a poet
but Gwen was a penguin
so Gwen couldn’t show it
Gwen couldn’t pen things
no hands on her wings
She was no pen Gwen
the poet penguin
fun, funny, hilarious, history, humor, nonsense, simile,
childhood, food, children, funny, horror, kindergarten, nonsense,
there once was a bear
who lived in belair
he owned a red hen
who made eggs for his kin
then one time like most bears do
the bear got hungery
and ate the red hen
and her last eggs of ten
with a gulp and a swallow
down went the hen
now there was no hen to lay eggs for his kin.
When Ben's beliefs they tried to stifle
He decided to jump off the Eiffel
Being of magnanimous mind
Uncle was exceedingly kind
Instead offering him his new, automatic rifle.
Jerry T Curtis
adventure, animal, crazy, hilarious, nonsense, silly, success,
I once knew a girl from Nantucket
Who chased down a goose, just to pluck it
As she ran, took a spill
So he gave her a quill
And I guess we all know, where he stuck it
Just not clean enough for contests---lol
Poor old Jack he was not so quick
But still he had some more tricks
A charmer he once was
But from the ladies he did not get applause
- "Oh My God" ... you remind me of Santa Claus
22.04.2015 A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
- My first Limerick ...... ( sorry Jack :))
animal, children, kids, funny, nonsense, pets, silly,
First you got an alligator.
Next came a giraffe.
Lions ride your elevator,
bears hide in your bath.
run amok through all your rooms!
Soon, if you don't set them free - there will be no room for me!
Popeye The Sailor Man
My name is Popeye the sailor man
I don't live in a big garbage can
I dis-like Spinach
strong to the finish
I'll cook your goose in a fying pan.
RAJAT KANTI CHAKRABARTY
Whimsy was a humorous hen
She had neither paper nor pen
She flew to the moon
And fell on a toon
Rushed to hospital in a van
Whimsy was a humorous hen/Limerick Copyright (C) Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty