Funny Poems About Patriotic or Patriotic Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Patriotic poems and/or funny poems about Patriotic. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Patriotic funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Patriotic Poems.

Poem Details | by Arthur Vaso |
Categories: america, art, humor, international, patriotic, peace, poetry,

The American Dream

The beauty of the dream
Even fools are allowed in
Misinformed and crawling on narrow stony roads
Yet in this land anything goes
We all have the right to our opinions and views
Apparently even old fools
One day soon
Guns will be taken
So that freedoms truly rule
As the clowns dance
One day
Poets shall rule

Remember this! Obama was no fool!

Poem Details | by Anais Vionet |
Categories: health, humor, humorous, irony, patriotic, political, teen,

Simply Gone - the Virus

Wow, it turns out Trump was right.
I saw it on “the Onion” - posted overnight.

Scientists woke up today and the virus
was simply gone - the miracle - has happened.
And they said that Trump was wrong!

The once dying - started laughing
first responders broke into song
patients shrugged off ventilators
they can go back home where they belong.

That God has been so merciful
is a story ripped from scripture
and since Trump - the antichrist - is here
we can move on to the rapture!


Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, angel, beautiful, business, childhood, death, education, fantasy, farewell, freedom, friendship, funeral, funny, growing up, happiness, happy, health, holiday, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, nostalgia, on writing and words, parody, passion, patriotic, peace, people, philosophy, slam, social, song, sorrow, sorry, spiritual, time, woman,

Ding Dong the Wicked Witch Is Dead

Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.

Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.

Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.

Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.

Poem Details | by Dan Keir |
Categories: adventure, courage, freedom, funny, hate, history, home, hope, humorous, journey, life, lonely, lost, patriotic, peace, people, places, political, space, travel, visionary,

Alien-Nation

One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: funny, patriotic, sports,

Apollo's Stars

Apollo's Stars

Apollo Creed’s the flag waving type
Sporting old glory for his Rocky fight
And when he got knocked
Right on his clock
He not only saw stars but saw stripes


Advice Per Simmons

There once was a man named Simmons
Who loved to advise men and women
And his strongest suit
Was choosing fresh fruit
But don’t buy persimmons, per Simmons


Much Needed Invention

I don’t mean to give apprehensions
To this much needed invention
But when it turns brrr
If I can’t wear fur
Give me full body hair extensions


Poem Details | by Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories: culture, earth, gender, health, humor, integrity, love,

Fascism's Uncertain Patriotic Ring

Fascism has grown cancerous maturity
to pathologically enforce
what mere nationalistic military-industrialized supremacy
would patriotically endorse.

Supremacists of race or gender
or metaphysical systems of personal as political investment,
mistake allegiance to icons and idols and pledges
of national privilege
for personal passion and investment in gratitudes of love
for EarthTribe's WinWin Lands with blessing waters,
Gaian Principles 
of Organic Health Co-Governing Procedures.

Against fascist growing cancers
degeneratively erasing
what EarthTribe optimal regenerators
are more matriotically embracing.

Poem Details | by Julian Scutts |
Categories: humor, patriotic, political,

Jean-Claude Juncker's Continental System

Mr. Juncker's Continental System

Cohorts of Luxembourg, arise!
Keep the Russians from the Rhiine.
Hosts of Luxembourg, en garde,
Confine the British to the brine.
"We'll do without America,"
says Merkel with aplomb.
Warily one has to ask,
"Whose finger's on the Bomb?"
Français ou Allemand?
Que parlons-nous, messieurs?
Until this issue's settled
It's Anglais, faut de mieux.

A toast, my brave companions,
on the path we march along.
Not bourbon and not whiskey
but cognac Napoleon!

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: america, anger, cancer, humor, mental illness, patriotic, political,

Ump

There once was a bully named Ump
With broom handle stuck up his Rump
He bragged, "I'm a rat!"
And they voted for that
As they scavenged for food at the dump.

Poem Details | by Mike Roberts |
Categories: celebration, community, fun, humorous, music, patriotic, summer,

Swooning To the Bassoon

At 3 o'clock on a Sunday afternoon
In the month of June Mr. Cartoon 
was heard singing along attune 
At the neighborhood saloon 
swooning to a swinging bassoon
harmonizing along with the platoon 
from Camp Lejeune 
all day and all night they crooned 
first under the sun and then the moon.

Poem Details | by Greg Gaul |
Categories: confusion, hilarious, humor, integrity, patriotic, political, word play,

Are You Kiddin' Me

Let's start with our 45th President,
His flaws are so clearly evident.

I call him the "Orange Chaos King",
Doesn't it have a catchy ring?

His election should never have been,
Yet he calls it his "really big win".

He thinks he's a truthful disruptor,
But we know that's really all bluster.

His morals and ethics some ignore,
The rest of us simply deplore.

As he destroys what America believes,
The majority can't wait till he leaves.

Poem Details | by James Edward Lee Sr. |
Categories: celebrity, community, engagement, funny, identity, patriotic, satire,

Prez Don

Prez Don  by James Edward Lee Sr.

Prez Don
Has won

Millions
Billions

No one
Cares sad

More cash
than Clairol

How he
Get job

Messy
Prissy

Hair comb
Best left on

Worst yet
Best kept

Got hunch
Didn’t launch

Clear dump
Vote Trump

11/15/17
by james edward lee sr.

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: crazy, funny, horror, humor, patriotic, political, sports,

Golf

I do not like our national leader
If I had a pet shark, he'd be a feeder
Hard to believe he's not a big joke
Oh what a homely pumpkin-head bloke.

I saw a rat, I saw a mouse
I saw a gobshyte near my house
His name ain't Paddy, his name ain't Rolf
He's a big cheater at the game of golf.

Poem Details | by Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories: anger, humanity, humor, loss, patriotic, satire,

Pretrumpian Pronouncements

I saw there was a mow-down in Las Vegas
of country western loves.
And also heard our President
was about to share his view.
But before he had his chance
to enlighten one and all,
I figured his best solution
was to hope before the next time
we'll all do our patriotic duty,
go out and buy the best automatic multi-repeating rifle
with scope that we can afford to buy,
so everyone can keep a well-scoped eye
on all the other country western wise
before we blast each other's patriotic duty
to stand and salute both our flags of equally good history,
leave no child with any color standing,
left unpatriotically behind.

Poem Details | by Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories: history, humor, mental illness, patriotic, usa,

King Donald Twitter

I wonder if King Donald
is an unhappy reincarnation of King George,
and now is his time to take back the royal throne
to get even with the common people
and those who would be their eyes
and ears
and noses,
smelling something rotten.

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: flying, food, humor, thanksgiving day,

Poor, Patriotic Samuel Lelune

Poor, patriotic Samuel Lelune
    welcomed November's Thanksgiving new moon

  Snarfed turkey non-stop, onward from noon
    ascended to heaven ~ human hot-air balloon

Poem Details | by Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories: health, humanity, humor, integrity, nature, patriotic,

Powers To Pardon

Dear Donald,

Some of us are wondering
Do your infinite powers to pardon
whomsoever thou shalt so desire,
include yourself?

Are you not only infallible,
like the Pope,
but also unimpeachable,
like God?

Just wondering,
waiting for your further divine enlightenment.

With warm regard,

The Village WitchHunter

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: america, humor, patriotic, satire,

Pre-Game Ceremony

The country's gone to pot
    Our politics is rot
  The climate is too hot
    United we are not

        PLAY BALL!

Poem Details | by Joe Dimino |
Categories: analogy, humorous, meaningful, patriotic, political, satire, wisdom,

Faith

Courts can free
or incarcerate the body--
we are subjects of laws,
both legislated
and those self imposed:

"Faith" is a double-edged sword--
it may work fine in heaven 
but fails miserably when it comes
to politicians.

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: america, humorous, patriotic,

Thee Nocturnal Ryde of Pall Revere

Pall Revere was renouned four his audacious mid-knight Ryde,

End alsow fore his silversmithin', inn witch he took grate pried!

Butt he is most famed four ridin' like a bat outta ewe no where,

Two alert Hancock, Adams, et al, fore there lives two spare!

Two lanterns inn a church belfry signaled en a-salt bye see;

(Pall gnu thee Brits were cummin as soon as they'd sipped there tee!)

On a borrowed hoarse he flu thru thee nite, thee patriots too summon,

Yellin' two ever'won, "Thee Brits ar cummin!  Thee Brits ar cummin!"

Pore Pall was later captured end his hoarse was confiscated two boot,

Butt thee Brits released him two thumb it back too Lexington afoot!

Poem Details | by Nick Trim |
Categories: england, humorous, passion, patriotic, people, silly,

Sarcasm

Freedom of speech is suppressed, 
it’s no more, seen a theft, 

I write this poem and know they won't arrest 

They say history is distorted, 
and true England replaced,
shame, 
that story of the dragon and George a fine patriotic taste 
they take Brunel’s cigar away and true England hard to trace.

And I am proud to be English while there is no pride, 
and you agree you are too and are for life,
both proud whilst pride there isn't.

Sarcasm

Poem Details | by Joe Dimino |
Categories: freedom, humanity, humorous, patriotic, perspective, political, wisdom,

Valentine Bemoaning

Warning: Political satire from a 
Conservative point of view -- if you feel you may
be offended, do not read. Sincerely, Joe. 

Valentine bemoaning to Cupid
what are we to do? Not an arrow
of yours launched this year has
found a political-heart that's true – 
blame it on the masks, you say, 
because Joe's went to Bill – and 
now Hillary is complaining, blaming
her loss on Jill. Oh what sorrows
we inadvertently send, when missing 
noble marks; freedom's trusted
guard-dogs, exposed as pretentious 
barks – next year, more gold in
their own socks, while the
people they serve get, the same 
empty promises, weighted down
with rocks –

Poem Details | by Brandy Morrison |
Categories: america, humor, patriotic, political, pride,

There Once Was a Man Named Trump

Once there was a man named Trump,
Whose hair was quite the frump,
He tweeted and he blustered,
But his speeches all just flustered.

He called himself a businessman,
But really just a Twitter fan,
He touted his great wall plan,
But ended up with no real stand.

With each golf game he played,
The American people just brayed,
For they knew this man's charade,
Would lead our country to fade.

So let us all come together,
And vow to make Americba better,
Without this man's orange weather,
We'll prosper and succeed forever.