Funny Poems About Psychological or Psychological Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Psychological poems and/or funny poems about Psychological. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Psychological funny poems!

Written by Tasha Taylor
Categories: boyfriend, funny love, girlfriend, psychological, relationship,

Schizophrenia

"Doctor!
Doctor!
How is he?"

"Quite terrible, Miss.
He will not survive the night,
Probably not even the hour."

"What does he have?
Terminal cancer?
Pneumonia?
Cardiac Arrest?"

"No.
It is worse then all of those.
Even combined."

"Oh no! 
Can I see him?

"I imagine you can, Miss.
But that's the problem.
I'm afraid I can't treat him
Since I can't--"

"Doctor! Please tell me.
I love him. 
He's my boyfriend.
We have no secrets."

"Then you may wanna sit down.
Miss, I am sorry to inform you,
Your boyfriend is ailed with
A severe case of nonexistence."

Written by M. L. Kiser
Categories: fire, humor, humorous, psychological,

Oops

A pyromaniac named Jack, Who hailed from the town of Hackensack, Decided one day, with matches he’d play He’s a mummy now, flat on his back!


Written by Gerald Dillenbeck
Categories: community, health, humor, integrity, psychological,

Predicting Assault Patterns

I've noticed,
As our economic and politically empowered
too consistently lead with their Right,
All us non-elite women
people of color
LGBTQ
and indigenous people
predictably lean to our Left

To find a space
where we feel safer,
and a sacred place
where we might imagine
our lives actually matter.

Written by Duke Beaufort
Categories: funny, marriage, men, psychological, relationship, trust

How To Give a Guy a Premarital Suitability Exam

Before the "I do" she must choose
A man that does well in dance shoes
His psyche gives a clue
When employing step two
Ply him to the limit with booze

Written by John Beam
Categories: corruption, humorous, hyperbole, political, psychological, satire

Conspiracy Nut

when some one else is                                                                                                   caught it's a conspiracy                                                                                                   when I say something


Written by Gorlum Gorlum
Categories: crazy, funny, health, humor, jobs, psychological

Limerick: Shrinks, Part 2

Once attending professional course
Shrinks attempted to fix mind flaws
They gorged on cocaine
But primitive brain
Has failed to achieve sacred pause

Written by Cynthia Buhain-Baello
Categories: conflict, funny, gender, identity, psychological,

Sadly Confused

He said he was a "woman",

Just trapped in a wrong body.

When time came he had to pee-

Used the room.... for "Men".
 
All rights reserved~~Cynthia Buhain-Baello~~05.28.15


The Dodoitsu is a fixed folk song form of Japanese origin 
and is often about LOVE  or HUMOR. It has 26 syllables, 
four lines of 7, 7, 7, 5 syllables respectively. 
It is unrhymed and non-metrical.

Written by Jerry T Curtis
Categories: anxiety, humor, psychological, stress,

Newsing and Boozing

There's a virus going around
And people getting sick
Some are even dying 
From a germ, that they can't kick

There's an asteroid, it's flying
on it's undetected path
Aiming for the earth
To just unleash its wrath


chorus
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear
So, just relax and have another beer


There are terrorist, they say, came home to roost  
Others over seas are busy buying Nukes
The end of the world, could be happening today
If it isn't now, it's likely on it's way

chorus 
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear 
So, just relax and have another beer

Written by S. O. Fasrus
Categories: bullying, humor, innocence, psychological, scary, wife

Ted

Ted was a proper torturer
he'd gag me after tea
he'd ram a flannel down my gob
then dangle me on his knee

A virgin when I married
my mums and dad were Mormons
home-schoolers don't do sex Ed. much
though they did go on about hormones

I thought Ted's ways were normal
it was all new ground to me
my terrified eyes would turn him on
so I didn't have the heart to flee

I got used to the violent jerking
I got used to a gob full of flannel
but I wished I'd prayed and made a fuss
when he hid me behind his panel.

S O F

Written by John Beam
Categories: allusion, humor, irony, psychological, river, word play

Juvenile

When the young Nile decided to run opposite of its peers.

Written by Gorlum Gorlum
Categories: crazy, dedication, humor, psychological,

Limerick: Shrinks, Part 1

Once a crowd of shrinks with goatees
Tried to put their mind at ease
They tried medication 
And then meditation 
But failed to achieve their bliss

Written by Gail Foster
Categories: crazy, fish, flower, humor, mirror, psychological

Narcissus and the Carp, a Tanka

narcissus, the pond
across the surface ripples
disillusionment
dead in the water, floating
not so koi now, bloated carp

by gail

Written by John Beam
Categories: community, green, humor, humorous, life, psychological

Rose Colored Glasses

If grass is always greener                                                                                                 on the other side of the fence                                                                                             that means I would have                                                                                                   to mow more grass

Written by Gail Foster
Categories: computer, confusion, humor, internet, poetry, psychological

Glitch

rainy retail park
turning on and off again
techno logic love

lost rhyme and losing reason
my computer saying 'O'

Written by Arthur Vaso
Categories: appreciation, brother, fate, humorous, psychological,

King Arthur's Proclamation

I knight thee
master chef of the Royal S Soup
let them pick their poison
and serve them their just desserts
little cupcakes hiding in the pan
why even peter was more of a man
Every kings chef has a great kitchen
The masons have built you a great stoic oven
lets put this to good use
after we shall have an ale or two
along with some laughs
leprechauns and trolls we turned
to ash

Written by Mark J. Halliday
Categories: depression, humorous, psychological, self, suicide, visionary

Escape To Nowhere

My reality sucks.
What's the point of being sane?
....................................................................................Can't escape myself.

Written by Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories: funny, humor, mythology, philosophy, psychological, religious

The Minds of Mina and Eunice

Mi: Does God eat his boogers? 
Eu: No of course God doesn't eat his boogers.
Mi: But I thought God could do anything.
Eu: Well he could eat his boogers but he just wouldn't.
Mi: So he does have boogers.
Eu: I don't know, I don't think God has boogers.
Mi: God can have anything he wants.
Eu: I don't think he wants boogers.
Mi: I don't think we can understand the mind of God.
Eu: We can't.
Mi: Maybe god is a booger.
Eu: God's not a booger.
Mi: But if God is all things, he's an all-knowing booger. 
Eu: Stop it.
Mi: He's a wrathful all-knowing booger.
Eu: I'm not talking to you anymore.

Written by Al Juman
Categories: dark, fear, funny, imagination, irony, psychological

Said the Shadow

Said the shadow
I am always crawling behind you.
look carefully!
I am a ghost!
I am yours!
no! I am his, hers, theirs.
Did I scare you?
No ---oo!
I just pull the pee out of you.

11/2/2015                     © Al. Juman - The said Poet
Type In (Al. Juman) For A relaxing and astonishing moment with all my POEMS

Written by Gail Foster
Categories: bible, humor, irony, judgement, psychological, satire

Casting Stuff On the Waters

He cast a crouton on the water
Watched it sog upon the swell
What came back was lava bread
And Chelsea buns as well

She threw in an expensive cake
‘Twas softer than a futon
But what came back upon the waves
Was just a soggy crouton

© Gail Foster 2016

Written by Christian Guild
Categories: confusion, giggle, psychological, write, writing,

Giberrish

The language I speak. 
O zpbr yp vpmgidr arpazr
No one understands but me. 
Pmzu o imfrtdysmd
My way to express feelings
Yjtpij tsmfpq zryyrd
Forgive me
Vpmgidom sy oyd gomrdt.

Written by Volodymyr Knyr
Categories: food, humorous, men, people, psychological,

A Leek and Leaking

He who eats his leek
does not let this leak.

Volodymyr Knyr
2014

Written by Gail Foster
Categories: bird, death, garden, humor, psychological, seasons

Winter Garden

As the ice began to harden
And the bitter breezes blew
In the lady's winter garden
A cold dove whispered 'Coo'
Oh, when will it be summer
The wistful lady cried
Not for ages 
It's a bummer
Said the dove
And promptly died

© Gail Foster 20th December 2016

Written by Gail Foster
Categories: character, humor, identity, loneliness, psychological, sad

Hello Kitty Man - a Surreptitious Sonnet For Surreptitious Sonnet Day

Once upon a time there was a man
Who had a life so boring no-one knew
That he was there, and nothing fun to do
But work a bit and drive a little van
And buy a Subway and a cheeky can
Of Redbull, or in summer sometimes two
Around and round the motorway he flew
Another almost was, and also ran

Or so it seemed. At sunset he would change
Into his costume and go up the street
And hide behind a lamppost. Oh how sweet
It felt, how surreptitious and how strange
They called him Hello Kitty Man. Hey, Hi!
They'd say, and oh so quickly walk on by

© Gail Foster 3rd August 2022

Written by Michelle Born
Categories: anxiety, confusion, how i feel, humor, husband, psychological

What Time Is It

I am lying here wide awake
Thoughts running in my head I can't shake,

My hubby is sleeping so peacefully
And here I am turning constantly,

So I finally decide to get out of bed
Too many thoughts still boggling my head,

The pain in my neck feels like it is here to stay
It really needs to just go away,

Time is flying and I don't know why
It won't be long there will be light in the sky,

So I drink me some hot tea to help my neck
Then I realize I am still alive so what the heck.


Written By: Unique Poetry 11-25-2015

Written by Gary Onderisin
Categories: humanity, humor, life, psychological,

Cinquain

Folly

brought down a notch,

outrageous fortune foiled,

shot down by due irreverence,

humor.