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Funny Poems About Red or Red Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Red poems and/or funny poems about Red. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Red funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Red Poems.

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, valentines day, roses are red,

MY FUNNY VALENTINE

Roses are red Violets are blue I’m up for a quickie Do you fancy one too? 13th February 2015


Poem Details | by P.S. AWTRY |
Categories: goodbye, humor, moving on, red,

Red-Dress-Fabulous Goodbye

Oh no! What are YOU doing here? I haven’t seen you in a year! But I’m sure it’s perfectly clear, I’m still red-dress fabulous, Dear! You thought you could steal my spotlight? You sauntered in like it’s your right. But now you know, it's no fair fight— I’m red-dress fabulous, tonight! Surely you see, it’s my parade! You’ve been upstaged. You’ve been out played! And now your welcome’s been overstayed, there in my red-dress-fabulous shade! It's getting late and you should fly- I bid you, red-dress-fabulous Good-bye! January 15, 2019 Poem of the Day ~ January 17, 2019

Poem Details | by john beharry |
Categories: bird, color, humor, red, sky, water,

Bird Poop In My Eye

Looking up into the sky
a bird pooped in my eye
as it was flying overhead
causing me to see red

It was warm and soggy
making me feel queasy
I scurried into the house
like an upset little mouse

I headed for the kitchen sink
and got there in a blink
Using the faucet spout
I tried to flush it out

When it was expelled
it had a funny smell
and the sink water
had a dirty colour

So when a bird is flying overhead
keep your head down instead
Do not look up into the sky
or you may get poop in your eye



Poem Details | by Poet Destroyer A |
Categories: addiction, art, funny,

Red Bull

~ADHD~

Beautiful Coffee spree
Close your eyes and fell high like a tree
Nothing beats the sugar in my energy
I can't live my life caffeine free
Somebody stop me!!!!!


 :)


Poem Details | by Jackson LaBaugh |
Categories: age, arabic, assonance, beach, bird, giggle, judgement,

Haiku for the Color Red

As heat bursts around,
silence lets me ponder on,
where I left my phone.

Poem Details | by A.O. Taner |
Categories: beautiful, beauty, courage, cute love, dark, deep, depression, desire, destiny, devotion, dream, first love, funny love, grief, happiness, heart, heartbreak, heartbroken, how i feel, i am, i love you, i miss you, innocence, irony, jealousy, lonely, longing, loss, lost, love, love hurts, miss you, missing, missing you, night, passion, psychological, romance, romantic, sad, sad love, silence, sky, sleep, solitude, sunset, true love,

Red Light

have you ever felt like 
the flashing red light on the roof,
lonely as ever
visible at night, useless by day?

in sync with its partner next door
for a quick kiss over a few flashes only 
then arguing again and again 
night in, night out.

have you ever felt like 
the flashing red light on the roof,
not signaling a warning to keep away
but sending a call for compassion?

using the dark pauses in between 
to yell the same name 
over and over and over
into the emptiness of each night.

have you ever felt like
the flashing red light on the roof,
being your silent cry
only heard by your eternal love?

Poem Details | by valerie bellefleur |
Categories: funny, roses are red,

Valentine Rejection

Roses are red and pink and yellow
Go find yourself another fellow

You promised you'd lose a ton of weight
By February of 2008

I don't want a gal in a size forty dress
If I wanted a monster, I'd visit Loch Ness

So very good wishes on this Cupid's Day
Go look for a guy who cares not what you weigh

Poem Details | by The Grahamburglar |
Categories: color, fun, funny, insect, nature, red, silly,

The Streaker

I peeked under a clover flower
and saw a ladybug in the shower
She turned bright red across her shell
and in her wrath began to yell.

Although her rage was crystal clear,
her voice was just too soft to hear
so I got closer to the ground
in hopes that I could hear the sound
and understand her tiny scream,
which swirled in the shower steam.

As I got close to listen hard
she jumped and flew across the yard.
But she was wet, and in a hurry
and somehow in the crazy flurry…
I think she simply just forgot,
she wasn’t wearing a single spot!

Poem Details | by George Aul |
Categories: humor,

Red Light

Love is never having to say, "My dearest, slow down on the chocolates!"


For "Roses are Red - One Liner" contest by Alexis Y.

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: humorous, military,

How The Red Baron Met His Doom

Alas, the famed Red Baron bit the dust.

   His last flight in his Fokker was a bust.

      Some thought Snoopy shot him down,

         But t'was a dude named Roy Brown,

            Leaving Charlie Brown and his friends nonplussed!



Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved


NOTE:  There is controversy to this very day about who and how the
Red Baron actually died.   Canadian pilot Roy Brown claimed he shot
him down but there is some evidence that he may have been hit by a
rifleman from the ground.   Here's hoping this will keep you awake at
night worrying about it!!!

Poem Details | by Poet Destroyer A |
Categories: funny, nature, roses are red,

ROSES FOR YOU-

Roses for you!

**
petals all over
sexy, sexy as can be
press the flesh tonight

**
my roses are black, 
did I forget the water 
dry flower bed!!

**
my roses are red, 
give me a kiss, sweet as you
potion pucker lips

**
flowers for the dead
roses running through my head
zombies are blue.

**
ouch! ouch! prickly thorns 
rose blood, falling all around, 
snake under my bed

**
I did not mean it
I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!
here have 2 roses

**
baby bash, ice cream
only In America
roses in demand 


by;pd

Poem Details | by Lawrence Ingle |
Categories: funny

REDNECK RED RHYME

RED ON THE HEAD,
LIKE A WEENIE ON A DOG,
LIKE A NOODLE ON A POODLE,
LIKE SOME KETCHUP ON A LOG,


Poem Details | by Khaleel Graham |
Categories: funny, red,

Anger

A man turned red with rage,
He was going through an angry stage,
He saw a black man named Ray,
Get hung by the KKK,
And he just had to flip the page

A man turned red with rage,
He was going through an angry stage,
He saw a Jew named Joshy,
Get killed by a Nazi,
Then he just had to turn the page

Then he saw a Japanese man named Sukai,
So he thought this page was okay,
Then he saw a plant go boom,
And everyone went zoom,
So he just had to throw the book away

Poem Details | by Ngoc Nguyen |
Categories: humor, love, romance, wisdom, women, youth,

Florid Lines on Lavender and Lovely, Red Roses

Like lavender and lovely, red roses,
they’re meant for your immaculate sweethearts
and their fine, little delicate noses;

not to damage the most sensitive parts
or overwhelm the olfactory senses,
bedaub with the finesse of the fine arts,

as love’s a game of great consequences.
Mates decide on the mere whiff of a scent,
so smell good or lead to major offenses!

Too much strong scent is wholly unpleasant;
a little hint on the neck and the wrist
is enough to smell attractively fragrant.

So don’t offend like my face hitting your fist: 
if you heed these lines you will get the gist.






Poem Details | by Cona Adams |
Categories: bird, humor,

Red Robin

With scarlet breasts
and charcoal backs
they came today
like jumping jacks
and brought our lawn alive.

They passed on by
the seed in place
plus water bath
to pace their chase
in groups of four or five.

I watch one hop
through still-green grass
ignoring me
on every pass
to bob head for his food.

That oil-well bob
to pull with beak
the hapless worm
into his cheek
is uncommonly rude.







Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: earth, earth day, funny, humor,

The next red hot real estate market

Earth's death seems to be in our stars
End comes from the greed planet's scars
But the rich have reach
And will visit the beach
Near estates they've purchased on Mars

Poem Details | by Katherine Stella |
Categories: adventure, black african american, childhood, dedication, family, fantasy, children, funny, history, imagination, inspirational, life, passion, people, seasons, thank you, uplifting, visionaryhalloween, red,

My Boo

<                          halloween haunting's
                       black shoe polish foundation
                             ruby red lipstick
                       pillow stuffed under big dress
                        red white bandana for hair

                               spatula in hand 
                       eggbeater in dress pocket
                              pillowcase for loot
                       daddy's boots causing blisters 
                          aunt jemima memories 




Entry For
Paula Sweanson's
Halloween Of Tears Past
GL AL


Tribute To Childhood Memories

Poem Details | by Elton Camp |
Categories: humor,

The Red-Faced Sunday School Teacher

The Red-Faced Sunday School Teacher

By Elton Camp

The Sunday school lesson she must teach
Jesus to Lazarus inside his tomb did reach

About the great love it did take 
From death his friend to awake

So to be sure to reach the childish heart
A question asked prior to the lesson start

“Who can tell what “resurrection” does mean?
A little girl to answer seemed to be very keen

“I’m not exactly sure, but I know one main thing.
If it lasts more than four hours, to a doc you bring.”

The teacher stammered and her face turned red
She was unable to reply to what the child said

From the room, she carefully slipped away
“As teacher I resign,” to the pastor she did say

Poem Details | by Allié-Marie Smith |
Categories: food, funny, roses are red,

COOKIE

Roses are red,
Violets are pleasant.
You're getting a cookie 
Instead of a present.

Poem Details | by William Robinson |
Categories: animals, children, funny, people, red,

****-A-DOODLE-OOO

A noisy, Rhode Island Red rooster
Awoke, from his dreams, Simon Schuster.
Simon got mad as heck
And adjusted Red's neck.
Now Red doesn't crow like he uster.

Poem Details | by Peter Dome |
Categories: animal, creation, garden, humor, insect, nature,

Red Bug

Red bug

*spotted *

on leaf.


Lady bug.


Peter Dome.copyright.2013.Dec.

Poem Details | by Samantha-Jane Smith |
Categories: funny, roses are red,

How I Would Make A Sweet Revenge Poem

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
What the h***
Happened to you?

Poem Details | by Gerard Keogh Jr. |
Categories: anniversary, confusion, funny, places

Red Cheeks. ( Both Sets.)

After tossing back too many shots,
My tummy got tied up in knots.
But the outhouse fell down,
now a king with no crown,
I cover up where I must: "Thank You Scotts'!"

Poem Details | by Sonia Walker |
Categories: humorous,

I Wore My Red Scarf Today

I wore my red scarf today,
feeling sassy and full of play,
I am the epitome of a drama queen,
wherever I am there is always a scene
as I walk down the street foxy and lean.

Poem Details | by Allié-Marie Smith |
Categories: funny, roses are red,

Poor horse

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Horses that lose races
Are turned into glue